Sheepdog
August 22nd 2007, 02:25 PM
Milton Friedman, Nobel Prize winning economist, popularized the truism, "There is no such thing as a free lunch." WELLLLL, Friedman is a no-good lassiez faire capitalist pig, and he is proof that the Nobel Prize committee is ran by a right wing Republican conspiracy!!!
To illustrate my case against Friedman and the corporate interests he was bought off with, I have devised a game that outlines how government intervention benefits all of us! The idea here is, what if the government handed out free lunches, say for example, to the poor? What "benefits" to you or to society can you think of? Winning candidates will be edited into the list here on this OP. (Thank Bob for evil TWeb Admin abuse of powers!!!!! :onebaddog:)
Without further ado....
Benefits of a 'free lunch' program:
Several billions of dollars will be allotted per year to maintain an efficient 'free lunch' bearucracy, lovingly labled FBFLEGA (the Frederal Bureau of Free Lunches and Excessive Governmental Acronyms)
Democrats will amend the Federal Free Lunch for the People Initiative bill with amnesty for "undocumented workers" of French Canadian origin.
Republicans will amend the Federal Free Lunch for the People Initiative bill with earmarks for a bridge crossing Cuddeback Lake (link) (http://www.galleryplayer.com/browse/collection_detail.aspx?catID=1163&sku=2530&imageID=2701).
Between filibusters and congressional vacations, the Initiative will be passed sometime between now and the next geologic epoch.
People will wait two hours in lines at the FBFLEGA offices to receive their free lunches. Four hours if, in the mean time of waiting, the government workers go on break. (Lunch time!)
Large "subsidies" will go to farmers who grow the food needed to produce free lunches. More specifically, large "subsidies" will go to them to NOT grow the food.
It will no doubt involve "government cheese." Expect a little gassiness.
The bread will be a bit stale.
The meat... well let's not talk about the meat. :eww:
Market prices will explode for cheese, bread, and meat.
Vegans will sue the government for millions of dollars plus litigation costs for discrimination. Do to the lack of vegetables.
Carnivores will sue the government for millions of dollars plus litigation costs for discrimination. Do to the use of vegetables.
Third-shift workers will sue the government for millions of dollars because free lunches are not served at midnight.
Taxes will go up 3% across the board to pay for the program. But, all people will be entitled to free lunches!
[Note: for those tone deaf to political humor, this is what we like to call satire.]
To illustrate my case against Friedman and the corporate interests he was bought off with, I have devised a game that outlines how government intervention benefits all of us! The idea here is, what if the government handed out free lunches, say for example, to the poor? What "benefits" to you or to society can you think of? Winning candidates will be edited into the list here on this OP. (Thank Bob for evil TWeb Admin abuse of powers!!!!! :onebaddog:)
Without further ado....
Benefits of a 'free lunch' program:
Several billions of dollars will be allotted per year to maintain an efficient 'free lunch' bearucracy, lovingly labled FBFLEGA (the Frederal Bureau of Free Lunches and Excessive Governmental Acronyms)
Democrats will amend the Federal Free Lunch for the People Initiative bill with amnesty for "undocumented workers" of French Canadian origin.
Republicans will amend the Federal Free Lunch for the People Initiative bill with earmarks for a bridge crossing Cuddeback Lake (link) (http://www.galleryplayer.com/browse/collection_detail.aspx?catID=1163&sku=2530&imageID=2701).
Between filibusters and congressional vacations, the Initiative will be passed sometime between now and the next geologic epoch.
People will wait two hours in lines at the FBFLEGA offices to receive their free lunches. Four hours if, in the mean time of waiting, the government workers go on break. (Lunch time!)
Large "subsidies" will go to farmers who grow the food needed to produce free lunches. More specifically, large "subsidies" will go to them to NOT grow the food.
It will no doubt involve "government cheese." Expect a little gassiness.
The bread will be a bit stale.
The meat... well let's not talk about the meat. :eww:
Market prices will explode for cheese, bread, and meat.
Vegans will sue the government for millions of dollars plus litigation costs for discrimination. Do to the lack of vegetables.
Carnivores will sue the government for millions of dollars plus litigation costs for discrimination. Do to the use of vegetables.
Third-shift workers will sue the government for millions of dollars because free lunches are not served at midnight.
Taxes will go up 3% across the board to pay for the program. But, all people will be entitled to free lunches!
[Note: for those tone deaf to political humor, this is what we like to call satire.]