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Zymologist
04-01-2016, 07:27 AM
How does someone determine if they have a personality disorder?

Catholicity
04-01-2016, 08:30 AM
How does someone determine if they have a personality disorder?

Well to be honest Zym, from the textbook perspective and from personal experience, those who have personality disorders generally refuse to acknowledge that they are sick or need help. I have known a few people to get help but typically its when there is a crisis situation. The idea that a person thinks they might have a personality disorder generally represents that they don't have a personality disorder but traits of another mental disorder that may have overlapping features. However if you are curious about yourself speak with a professional, if its someone else, still speak with a professional but there are a few books that can help you figure out the criteria and whether a person matches them, but remember it can only give you a general zone of a person...

Sparko
04-01-2016, 08:40 AM
I think generally your friends and family might become worried about your actions and let you know that what you are doing or thinking is abnormal. Then you would go see a psychiatrist and talk to them about it.

Zymologist
04-01-2016, 08:45 AM
Well to be honest Zym, from the textbook perspective and from personal experience, those who have personality disorders generally refuse to acknowledge that they are sick or need help. I have known a few people to get help but typically its when there is a crisis situation. The idea that a person thinks they might have a personality disorder generally represents that they don't have a personality disorder but traits of another mental disorder that may have overlapping features. However if you are curious about yourself speak with a professional, if its someone else, still speak with a professional but there are a few books that can help you figure out the criteria and whether a person matches them, but remember it can only give you a general zone of a person...

I did some Googling yesterday on a whim and it got me thinking. I know, I know...self-diagnosing via the internet is a terrible idea. I'm just bouncing the idea around, at this point.

...But I can say that Avoidant personality disorder (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder) sure describes me with freakish accuracy. Literally every indicator that wiki lists in the summary applies to me, and has since ~junior high.

Maybe the idea is ridiculous. Most other people seem to think that it is. But this would sure explain a lot about me and, though it might sound weird, it would be a big relief.

Sparko
04-01-2016, 08:59 AM
I did some Googling yesterday on a whim and it got me thinking. I know, I know...self-diagnosing via the internet is a terrible idea. I'm just bouncing the idea around, at this point.

...But I can say that Avoidant personality disorder (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder) sure describes me with freakish accuracy. Literally every indicator that wiki lists in the summary applies to me, and has since ~junior high.

Maybe the idea is ridiculous. Most other people seem to think that it is. But this would sure explain a lot about me and, though it might sound weird, it would be a big relief.Heck that describes me too in many points. I bet it covers 80% of twebbers. A lot of people are shy and feel inferior and awkward in social situations and try to avoid those situations. I don't think it rises to the level of a personality disorder though. I think the APD would be extreme shyness to the point of not being able to function in society. It mentions things like self-loathing too. That is something I hope you don't feel, and your posts don't seem to indicate anything like that. Most of us feel crappy about being so shy but it doesn't rise to the level of loathing ourselves.

I tend to be shy around new people but around friends and family they would say I was not shy at all. I also tend to take negative criticism to heart a little too much. But I am aware of that and compensate for it by telling myself that it is just ME reacting wrongly and I actually have value and what that other person said is just their opinion and could be just being said out of spite.

Most personality disorders are normal traits that everyone experiences, but taken to a level that it interferes with their life.

Zymologist
04-01-2016, 09:07 AM
Heck that describes me too in many points. I bet it covers 80% of twebbers. A lot of people are shy and feel inferior and awkward in social situations and try to avoid those situations. I don't think it rises to the level of a personality disorder though. I think the APD would be extreme shyness to the point of not being able to function in society. It mentions things like self-loathing too. That is something I hope you don't feel, and your posts don't seem to indicate anything like that. Most of us feel crappy about being so shy but it doesn't rise to the level of loathing ourselves.

I tend to be shy around new people but around friends and family they would say I was not shy at all. I also tend to take negative criticism to heart a little too much. But I am aware of that and compensate for it by telling myself that it is just ME reacting wrongly and I actually have value and what that other person said is just their opinion and could be just being said out of spite.

Most personality disorders are normal traits that everyone experiences, but taken to a level that it interferes with their life.

I would definitely say it interferes with my life. It has for a long time. I'm glad to hear that a lot of this stuff isn't evidenced in my posts, but that's because I have to make a conscious effort to do so, ironically, because I'm worried about what people think.

I just have a hard time getting past the fact that social interaction has always seemed different for me than everyone around me, and it seems like more than just my being introverted. I could try to get into details of why I think I might actually have this disorder, and try to give evidence, but I don't want to do that. (Ironically again, this supports the whole "avoidance" part.)

Sparko
04-01-2016, 09:18 AM
I would definitely say it interferes with my life. It has for a long time. I'm glad to hear that a lot of this stuff isn't evidenced in my posts, but that's because I have to make a conscious effort to do so, ironically, because I'm worried about what people think.

I just have a hard time getting past the fact that social interaction has always seemed different for me than everyone around me, and it seems like more than just my being introverted. I could try to get into details of why I think I might actually have this disorder, and try to give evidence, but I don't want to do that. (Ironically again, this supports the whole "avoidance" part.)

Here are a couple of articles dealing with shyness that I found insightful.

http://lifehacker.com/how-i-got-over-being-shy-and-embraced-talking-to-people-1692295385
http://lifehacker.com/don-t-be-shy-others-are-too-busy-worrying-about-themse-1660966638

Basically everyone else is shy too, and they are spending most of the time wondering what you think about them while you are wondering what they think about you. They aren't thinking about you at all. And if you do goof up and say something embarrassing, they understand because they have been there too, and will dismiss it and not automatically think you are some fool. Just like you would think if they said something embarrassing.

Catholicity
04-01-2016, 09:22 AM
I did some Googling yesterday on a whim and it got me thinking. I know, I know...self-diagnosing via the internet is a terrible idea. I'm just bouncing the idea around, at this point.

...But I can say that Avoidant personality disorder (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder) sure describes me with freakish accuracy. Literally every indicator that wiki lists in the summary applies to me, and has since ~junior high.

Maybe the idea is ridiculous. Most other people seem to think that it is. But this would sure explain a lot about me and, though it might sound weird, it would be a big relief.

Careful there...Avoidant personality disorder an also label folks with Aspergers, introverts, folks with PTSD, Agorophobia, those with OCD, those with severe depression and a host of other mental disorders.... Avoidant personality disorder is a class unto itself athough it tends to cooccur with BPD, and even pops up in other cases. Personality disorders like this take a specialist and not just Dr. Google, which I recommend people stay away from....

Zymologist
04-01-2016, 09:30 AM
Careful there...Avoidant personality disorder an also label folks with Aspergers, introverts, folks with PTSD, Agorophobia, those with OCD, those with severe depression and a host of other mental disorders.... Avoidant personality disorder is a class unto itself athough it tends to cooccur with BPD, and even pops up in other cases. Personality disorders like this take a specialist and not just Dr. Google, which I recommend people stay away from....

Yeah, that's why I said I know it's not a good idea, and I'm just bouncing the idea around.

Alright, I'm going to open up a little more than I usually do. This whole thing is really ironic to me, and maybe this will help explain why:

My first, kneejerk (and unfair) reaction is to comment something along the lines of, "Ok, fine. The thread was a stupid idea, and this whole thing is ridiculous. Just forget I asked anything." That is actually often my first reaction to people's responses to the threads I post.

But here's the thing: it's unfair to the responders, and I know it. I don't think you're intending to be dismissive, and most people wouldn't read you that way. It's purely my own negativity and self-consciousness that's giving me that conclusion. It's irrational, and I know it, but I can't just turn it off. (If only.)

So there's the thing: I'm actually beginning to wish that I hadn't posted the thread, because, as usual for me, it's going to get nowhere. But this thinking is excessively negative on my part. Except this negativity is how I always am, and how I've been for a long time. Trying to interact with people with a more open mind has never helped, and it's never gotten better. So it suggests to me that it might just be more than me being shy.

I guess I'm asking for a little bit of understanding here, because I'm actively fighting the urge to be negative and feel stupid for even asking the question. If my posting history hasn't tended to evidence that thinking, that's awesome, but I'm faking it, I promise.

Sparko
04-01-2016, 09:33 AM
Like that myers/briggs thing that is so popular on the internet. I think that is a bunch of baloney. "I am in INTJ!" "I am an ENTJ!" "I am an ISTP" "I am a poptart!" wait, what?

Zymologist
04-01-2016, 10:35 AM
It just occurred to me that I posted a thread on April 1st, speculating that I might have a personality disorder. :lol:

Carrikature
04-01-2016, 02:05 PM
Here's my take on this:

If you're worried about it, and you are, go see a professional. Let them diagnose you (or not). Let them help you find a path forward. There's no shame in it. We need outside help, sometimes, and the internet isn't always the place to find it.

Zymologist
04-01-2016, 02:07 PM
Here's my take on this:

If you're worried about it, and you are, go see a professional. Let them diagnose you (or not). Let them help you find a path forward. There's no shame in it. We need outside help, sometimes, and the internet isn't always the place to find it.

In that case...how do I go about finding a professional to go see? This is a dumb question, but short of Googling "mental health professional" in my city I'm not sure how to find one.

Catholicity
04-01-2016, 02:11 PM
Yeah, that's why I said I know it's not a good idea, and I'm just bouncing the idea around.

Alright, I'm going to open up a little more than I usually do. This whole thing is really ironic to me, and maybe this will help explain why:

My first, kneejerk (and unfair) reaction is to comment something along the lines of, "Ok, fine. The thread was a stupid idea, and this whole thing is ridiculous. Just forget I asked anything." That is actually often my first reaction to people's responses to the threads I post.

But here's the thing: it's unfair to the responders, and I know it. I don't think you're intending to be dismissive, and most people wouldn't read you that way. It's purely my own negativity and self-consciousness that's giving me that conclusion. It's irrational, and I know it, but I can't just turn it off. (If only.)

So there's the thing: I'm actually beginning to wish that I hadn't posted the thread, because, as usual for me, it's going to get nowhere. But this thinking is excessively negative on my part. Except this negativity is how I always am, and how I've been for a long time. Trying to interact with people with a more open mind has never helped, and it's never gotten better. So it suggests to me that it might just be more than me being shy.

I guess I'm asking for a little bit of understanding here, because I'm actively fighting the urge to be negative and feel stupid for even asking the question. If my posting history hasn't tended to evidence that thinking, that's awesome, but I'm faking it, I promise.

It sounds a little more like you might have clinical depression. Even if you did have a personality disorder per se as opposed to clinical depression, (which can make you avoid crowds and people like crazy, believe me I know) one way to help both is to go through cognitive behavioral therapy which can challenge the negative thoughts you have about yourself and help you find social situations you might be comfortable in. BTW have you ever looked up the symptoms for clinical depression? I don't have that, I have a more complex mood disorder but part of it is very severe depression and I tend to avoid people even though I love being social. Negative thinking is also a part of it but for different reasons.

Catholicity
04-01-2016, 02:12 PM
In that case...how do I go about finding a professional to go see? This is a dumb question, but short of Googling "mental health professional" in my city I'm not sure how to find one.

Actually go to psychology today and look up therapists along with your insurance.

Sparko
04-02-2016, 08:35 AM
yeah if you have medical insurance that covers mental health, your carrier usually will have an online tool to help you find a doctor or therapist in your area that is in your plan. Log on to their website and take a look.

Carrikature
04-04-2016, 09:54 PM
Irony is me telling Zym that the internet isn't always the place to find answers while the answer to his next question requires the internet. :argh:

Carrikature
04-04-2016, 09:56 PM
yeah if you have medical insurance that covers mental health, your carrier usually will have an online tool to help you find a doctor or therapist in your area that is in your plan. Log on to their website and take a look.

I would suggest this first for money reasons, but Cath's answer is also good.

With that, there's only two pieces of advice I have:

1) Keep trying people until you find someone you can open up to and be honest with.*
2) Open up and be honest with that person.



*My understanding is that, statistically, good therapist/counselor match is the highest factor for continued improvement.

Zymologist
04-05-2016, 02:11 PM
Well I had an appointment yesterday. My first time talking to a shrink (his words, actually). We'll see how it goes after a couple more visits.

Carrikature
04-06-2016, 08:40 AM
:thumb:

Hope it works out for you.

leejosepho
04-09-2016, 06:08 AM
Well I had an appointment yesterday. My first time talking to a shrink (his words, actually). We'll see how it goes after a couple more visits.

Nothing much will ever transpire there. Shrinks typically just do medication management, psychologists do things like CBT and therapists try to help the "patient" or "client" make sense and/or use of whatever else.

I have no qualifications for diagnosing myself or anyone else, but I do happen to be a certified nut with much experience in survival as an escapee...


...from the textbook perspective and from personal experience, those who have personality disorders generally refuse to acknowledge that they are sick or need help...
Needing help does not necessarily prove one is sick...


I think generally your friends and family might become worried about your actions and let you know that what you are doing or thinking is abnormal. Then you would go see...and talk...


...find someone you can open up to and be honest with.*
...

*My understanding is that, statistically, good therapist/counselor match is the highest factor for continued improvement.
Yes, but the matter of "good therapist/counselor" is most-crucial.