Chatroom Suicide

[yxboom]

Brother's pain over online 'suicide'
BBC News (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/2773547.stm)
"You see people laughing about it and encouraging him to take more," Rich told the BBC World Service's Outlook programme.

[Patroclus]

:huh:

[$cirisme]

I read this awhile ago on another forum, it is truly sad.

[yxboom]

The story was filed
Wednesday, 19 February, 2003, 08:19 GMT
:hrm:

[Em7add11]

So you found that story an hour after it was published?

[$cirisme]

Actually, I believe it was from a different source other than the BBC. :hrm:

[dizzle]

Or it has happened more than once....

[Pilgrim]

That's just horrible.

[Lizard]

:bawl: This is disgusting.

[dizzle]

It is like those mob mentalities that encourage people who are contemplating jumping off of bridges or buildings.

[Ishmael]

Dee Dee Warren:
It is like those mob mentalities that encourage people who are contemplating jumping off of bridges or buildings.

I don't think so. I think that people in a chat room have no idea whether someone is just joking and being a retard (especially teens) OR serious about something.

Even in real life, as a trained professional, I am constantly amazed by the presenting of suicidal thoughts/gesture/threats to get attention or to work the system.

Of course, I treat all talk of suicide seriously, just in case. But I see no reason why untrained chatters in cyberspace should have known that the young man wasn't just a Troll looking for attention.

[dizzle]

I differ with you on this one Cal.. he was not just typing words,he was in front of a webcam and displaying the effects of ingesting too many drugs.

[Ryokan]

If no one is there to remind us, it seems like many of us forget we are human. It is very disturbing. I feel sorry for the man wwho committed suicide. He must have been very very lost.

[ACow]

Hmmm. Stupid person + Stupid People = Stupid outcome.

On the one hand its sad he died.

On the other hand at least he won't try to prove how "hardcore" he is to anyone in the future. Darwin award nominee anyone?

[Ishmael]

Dee Dee Warren:
I differ with you on this one Cal.. he was not just typing words,he was in front of a webcam and displaying the effects of ingesting too many drugs.

Even the web cam is not a sure bet in this age. The guy could've been taking sugar pills and acting like he was being "hardcore."

It's sad. I defineately, as a trained professional would have reacted to the talk and behavior immediately.. I am just not convinced that the people online with him can be held responsible in the culture WE have created.

My opinion of course...

[Pilgrim]

It is a point well taken though Cal. Definately something to think about.

[Lizard]

Calvinist:


Even the web cam is not a sure bet in this age. The guy could've been taking sugar pills and acting like he was being "hardcore."

It's sad. I defineately, as a trained professional would have reacted to the talk and behavior immediately.. I am just not convinced that the people online with him can be held responsible in the culture WE have created.

My opinion of course...

That is one reason it is so frightning. I don't think that this is a reflection on the individuals so much as on the culture WEhave created. I agree with your observation on our culture. That just makes it worse.

[wienerdog]

It's stuff like this that makes me look at the sky and think "OK Jesus, any time you want to come back and set things right would be fine with me." Preterism notwithstanding.

[Pilgrim]

"even so Lord jesus, come quickly"

[brother vinny]

dum-dee-dum-dee-dum

[Rahab]

The atmosphere which reigns in the majority of chat rooms remains deceptive and definitly thrives on the vulnerability of the participants.

As Ishmael mentionned, any announcement of the intent to harm oneself must be taken seriously. Even as one may be dealing with an "attention getter", it is clear that when folks resort to attempting to get emotions high by announcing their death wish in a public forum, something dysfunctional is going on in their lives. From that point of view, any potential "attention getter" is there to fulfill a need his/her real life does not provide.

If we reflect on the phenomenon of chat rooms, we can make some interesting observations: chat rooms have become a mean for many people to create a social circle they can manipulate, disengage from, play with and face no consequences for their choices. The worst consequence being rejection from the usual audience or the symbolic hammer of the moderator exercising its booting power.(or a bot).

There is no accountability factor to hold participants responsible for their actions and communication. That is the very downside of cyber communication.

The chat room dependent is often someone who suffers of social isolation (at times self imposed or created by the fear of being rejected as the person he/she is in real life). It becomes addictive for such person who seeks a contact with the "outside world" yet wants to avoid rejection or confrontation. Remaining anonymous and creating a persona which can be fabulated upon becomes tempting. In that environment, one may project any type of self created fantasy and confuse it for a reality. And other participants will receive that fantasy as the person's reality.


The tragic incident mentionned in the OP ought to be no surprise to any of us. We may not know of the number of folks who harmed themselves and disappeared permanently from our computer screens. Those who are so dependent on any positive validation in cyber communication that being dismissed or ignored is lived as the most intense tragedy.

Some will neglict their real life obligations. Work may be missed after a sleepless night of self tormenting thoughts. Spouse and children may be told "leave me alone"...that is "with my chat buddies". School attendance may be disturbed and attention from the 14 year old be focused on getting home as fast as possible to log in fantasy land. The chat room lunch break of the computer equipped clerk progressively becomes a misuse of his/her employment time as it extends past the legitimate break.


I must ask: can we expect normal reactions in an atmosphere where so many have disconnected from their own reality? Can they truly connect with someone else's reality? In that case, a young man seeking to impress an audience and push his own limits which would result in his death if noone intervened. (his brother did mention that he did not have any intentions to complete suicide).

I had only once found myself in a situation (as a mod) when I spent 6 hours straight on line keeping a communication with a potentialy suicidal chatter. It was mentaly and emotionaly exhausting. I had to stay focused on getting as many personal information as I could from him. His location, family situation, name of a relative or close friend, anyone I could then alert to go to his home. I had to be manipulative and cover all sorts of topics to get the type of information we needed. And I was more than 3000 miles away from that person, in a foreign country.

As we found out he was located in Texas, it happened to coincide with the home town of a fellow mod from another christian chat. We deployed every resource possible to have an address which we communicated to the mod. As of the last news I had received a few years ago now, our chatter was rescued and not just from his suicidal thoughts. He was befriended by this christian mod who provided via his church a support system, including steady employment and covering some of the critical health care needs he had. He also accepted Christ a few months later.

Even as we may be willing and capable to connect with the reality of other people in a chat room, it is a difficult process to talk someone out of any possible self inflicted harm. The best thing to do is to locate where the individual is and contact local resources to make an immediate rescue intervention and follow up after the "crisis" has been contained.

The other important thing is to not hesitate to contact someone you know has been professionaly trained to deal with suicide crisis scenarios. Once you detect a possible crisis, make sure you pull all the resources you have available.

The internet lacks an organized network capable of intervening each time any of us comes across, in any cyber communication, a person who communicates their intent to harm themselves.