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Sparko
11-07-2017, 08:15 AM
Taz is a mostly blind, mostly deaf, crotchety old dog. And I think he has it out for me.

I don't know how he does it, but he wakes up two hours before I have to get up in the morning insisting to go out. Which means if I don't let him out, he will just pee on the bed. He doesn't care, he is an old fart. Or he will jump off the bed and pee on the carpet. Either way he is gonna pee. So I have to get up and let him out. After which he decides it is now morning and will not go back to sleep. Which means I cannot go back to sleep.

I am trying to put him in his cage after his morning wakeup which is in the kitchen, hoping to get a couple hours of sleep. So far it is sort of working. He will bang around in his cage for a while and then lay down. but then about an hour later (which is still about 40 minutes before I have to get up and I have JUST managed to fall asleep again after his first waking me up) he starts whining and barking to be let out.

Behold, the face of evil:


24788

rogue06
11-07-2017, 08:43 AM
Taz is a mostly blind, mostly deaf, crotchety old dog. And I think he has it out for me.

I don't know how he does it, but he wakes up two hours before I have to get up in the morning insisting to go out. Which means if I don't let him out, he will just pee on the bed. He doesn't care, he is an old fart. Or he will jump off the bed and pee on the carpet. Either way he is gonna pee. So I have to get up and let him out. After which he decides it is now morning and will not go back to sleep. Which means I cannot go back to sleep.

I am trying to put him in his cage after his morning wakeup which is in the kitchen, hoping to get a couple hours of sleep. So far it is sort of working. He will bang around in his cage for a while and then lay down. but then about an hour later (which is still about 40 minutes before I have to get up and I have JUST managed to fall asleep again after his first waking me up) he starts whining and barking to be let out.

Behold, the face of evil:


24788
He has you wrapped around his paw :hehe:

Sparko
11-07-2017, 08:53 AM
Don't let the cutsey face fool you. He is doing this on purpose.

Catholicity
11-07-2017, 09:06 AM
Umm dogs get a little senile when they get old especially about food and bathroom business. next time get a cat and a litter box. they take care of their own business. Although the food thing when they get old is the same in cats as it is dogs. 5 am I AM HUNGRY!

mossrose
11-07-2017, 09:30 AM
Poor little boy.

Give him a hug for me.

One Bad Pig
11-07-2017, 09:47 AM
Umm dogs get a little senile when they get old especially about food and bathroom business. next time get a cat and a litter box. they take care of their own business. Although the food thing when they get old is the same in cats as it is dogs. 5 am I AM HUNGRY!
I just leave (dry) food out for my cat. She doesn't overeat.

Sparko
11-07-2017, 09:57 AM
I just leave (dry) food out for my cat. She doesn't overeat.Taz would eat till he threw up, then eat that.

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 10:11 AM
Dogs have the cognitive capacity equivalent of a young human toddler and thus are incapable of actually being evil. He's just a senile dog that can't hold it anymore.

One Bad Pig
11-07-2017, 10:19 AM
Dogs have the cognitive capacity equivalent of a young human toddler and thus are incapable of actually being evil. He's just a senile dog that can't hold it anymore.

You haven't met many young toddlers, have you?

:outtie:

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 10:23 AM
You haven't met many young toddlers, have you?

:outtie:

I have. They aren't cognitively aware that their actions are causing harm. You have to be capable of ""knowing better to commit moral evil.

mikewhitney
11-07-2017, 10:28 AM
Don't let the cutsey face fool you. He is doing this on purpose.

have you tried exorcism?

Sparko
11-07-2017, 10:29 AM
Dogs have the cognitive capacity equivalent of a young human toddler and thus are incapable of actually being evil. He's just a senile dog that can't hold it anymore.

Ha!

I recorded his barking when he was in the cage this morning and ran it through Google Translate for Animals. (https://www.google.co.uk/intl/en/landing/translateforanimals/tour.html)

This is what he said:

"Let me out of this *bleeping* cage right now and FEED ME or I swear I am going to pee on you tonight when you are asleep, you *bleeping* *bleep* *bleep* *BEEEEEEEEEP*"

Sparko
11-07-2017, 10:40 AM
have you tried exorcism?

24792

Catholicity
11-07-2017, 10:41 AM
I just leave (dry) food out for my cat. She doesn't overeat.

We feed our cats wet food with a little dry sometimes. They are the rottenest cats. But I think they believe they are dogs. They even lick you to death and act like you are a chew toy (I don't know how they manage to be gentle with those canines) And then one instead of being a lap cat lays next to you with his belly out stretched to be scratched. and they play fetch....... Of course it should be noted that the kind of cat I have (mostly Abyssinian) is noted in cat and dog circles for being "the Border Collie of the Cat World" They even try to heard family in the same room and steal meat from your fingers. especially jerky and chicken.

Sparko
11-07-2017, 10:43 AM
We feed our cats wet food with a little dry sometimes. They are the rottenest cats. But I think they believe they are dogs. They even lick you to death and act like you are a chew toy (I don't know how they manage to be gentle with those canines) And then one instead of being a lap cat lays next to you with his belly out stretched to be scratched. and they play fetch....... Of course it should be noted that the kind of cat I have (mostly Abyssinian) is noted in cat and dog circles for being "the Border Collie of the Cat World" They even try to heard family in the same room and steal meat from your fingers. especially jerky and chicken.

This is a dog thread. No cats allowed!

24793

One Bad Pig
11-07-2017, 10:55 AM
We feed our cats wet food with a little dry sometimes. They are the rottenest cats. But I think they believe they are dogs. They even lick you to death and act like you are a chew toy (I don't know how they manage to be gentle with those canines) And then one instead of being a lap cat lays next to you with his belly out stretched to be scratched. and they play fetch....... Of course it should be noted that the kind of cat I have (mostly Abyssinian) is noted in cat and dog circles for being "the Border Collie of the Cat World" They even try to heard family in the same room and steal meat from your fingers. especially jerky and chicken.
My cat plays fetch. She's a little hazy on the concept of returning the object all the way back to me, though. If she drops it half-way, she expects me to go pick it up from there and throw it again. In certain moods, she'll bite.

Catholicity
11-07-2017, 11:03 AM
I was speaking about a mysterious hybrid animal It appears to be a cat, but acts like a dog, it even sort of has a "bark meow" from time to time. Never let outer disguises fool you, here's is one of said mystery creatures. 24794

rogue06
11-07-2017, 11:07 AM
Ha!

I recorded his barking when he was in the cage this morning and ran it through Google Translate for Animals. (https://www.google.co.uk/intl/en/landing/translateforanimals/tour.html)

This is what he said:

"Let me out of this *bleeping* cage right now and FEED ME or I swear I am going to pee on you tonight when you are asleep, you *bleeping* *bleep* *bleep* *BEEEEEEEEEP*"
You never share even a scrap from your bacon vaults, right?

Sparko
11-07-2017, 11:07 AM
Everyone already knows CATS are evil. duh.

This is about a dog being evil. It is unheard of since the time of Cujo and he was sick.

Oh no! I wonder if Taz has been possessed by the spirit of a CAT???

rogue06
11-07-2017, 11:14 AM
Everyone already knows CATS are evil. duh.

24795

mossrose
11-07-2017, 11:35 AM
Cats are better.

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 11:35 AM
My dog thinks he's a cat.

rogue06
11-07-2017, 11:35 AM
Cats are better.
At being evil. :yes:

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 11:48 AM
At being evil. :yes:

They lack the cognitive capacity! They're just scared that the bumbling giant human might hurt them.

rogue06
11-07-2017, 11:53 AM
:no: Pure, unadulterated, concentrated evil.

mossrose
11-07-2017, 11:55 AM
At being evil. :yes:

At everything.

rogue06
11-07-2017, 11:57 AM
At everything evil.
FIFY n/c

Sparko
11-07-2017, 11:59 AM
are you all still talking about cats? This thread is a cat free zone. :glare:

Cerebrum123
11-07-2017, 12:00 PM
At being evil. :yes:

Like Disastro in Atomic Puppet, or Evil the Cat from Earthworm Jim. :yes:

rogue06
11-07-2017, 12:17 PM
are you all still talking about cats? This thread is a cat free zone. :glare:


24804

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 12:34 PM
Nothing in the order Carnivora has the mental capacity for evil. Only sapient beings are capable of being evil. Because you have to know that you know the right and choose to do the wrong instead. So, only humans that have reached a certain development stage(formal operational thought? Except that someone can become a Christian while still in the Concrete operations stage...) are capable of choosing good or evil.

Sparko
11-07-2017, 12:35 PM
Nothing in the order Carnivora has the mental capacity for evil. Only sapient beings are capable of being evil. Because you have to know that you know the right and choose to do the wrong instead. So, only humans that have reached a certain development stage(formal operational thought? Except that someone can become a Christian while still in the Concrete operations stage...) are capable of choosing good or evil.:twitch:

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 12:40 PM
:twitch:

What? Dogs and cats are not smart enough to be evil. Neither are babies and small children. God is too smart for evil. So evil is for creatures who are just smart enough to choose to do something stupid that harms others unjustly.

Sparko
11-07-2017, 12:44 PM
What? Dogs and cats are not smart enough to be evil. Neither are babies and small children. God is too smart for evil. So evil is for creatures who are just smart enough to choose to do something stupid that harms others unjustly.\

This is a joke thread, CBW.

One Bad Pig
11-07-2017, 12:56 PM
Nothing in the order Carnivora has the mental capacity for evil. Only sapient beings are capable of being evil. Because you have to know that you know the right and choose to do the wrong instead. So, only humans that have reached a certain development stage(formal operational thought? Except that someone can become a Christian while still in the Concrete operations stage...) are capable of choosing good or evil.
You're taking this thread way too literally and seriously, cbw.

rogue06
11-07-2017, 01:11 PM
Nothing in the order Carnivora has the mental capacity for evil. Only sapient beings are capable of being evil. Because you have to know that you know the right and choose to do the wrong instead. So, only humans that have reached a certain development stage(formal operational thought? Except that someone can become a Christian while still in the Concrete operations stage...) are capable of choosing good or evil.
This is a Poop Deck thread. Don't take it seriously :hug:




















Except the part about cats being evil. They truly are.

One Bad Pig
11-07-2017, 01:13 PM
Except the part about cats being evil. They truly are.
The NSA's losing too many recruits to them again, aren't they?

Sparko
11-07-2017, 01:20 PM
This is a Poop Deck thread. Don't take it seriously :hug:




nuh-uh

rogue06
11-07-2017, 01:23 PM
The NSA's losing too many recruits to them again, aren't they?
:huh:

We have to turn them away in droves even tightening the requirements for joining because we are getting too many qualified candidates don't have enough facilities and want only the best of the besterest.

Cerebrum123
11-07-2017, 01:55 PM
:huh:

We have to turn them away in droves even tightening the requirements for joining because we are getting too many qualified candidates don't have enough facilities and want only the best of the cheapest.

fify/nc.

rogue06
11-07-2017, 02:07 PM
fify/nc.
Pffft. They already literally work for peanuts.

Cerebrum123
11-07-2017, 02:12 PM
Pffft. They already literally work for peanuts.

Kind of proving my point.

Christianbookworm
11-07-2017, 02:22 PM
I think this thread doesn't belong in animal husbandry!

rogue06
11-07-2017, 02:45 PM
I think this thread doesn't belong in animal husbandry!
What. Wait. You mean this isn't in the poop deck?


Squirrels! My office! NOW!!

rogue06
11-07-2017, 02:49 PM
Kind of proving my point.
:no: It's all about the honor of serving. Little squirrel babies go to sleep at night dreaming about serving in the NSA.

Teallaura
11-07-2017, 02:49 PM
Taz is a mostly blind, mostly deaf, crotchety old dog. And I think he has it out for me.

I don't know how he does it, but he wakes up two hours before I have to get up in the morning insisting to go out. Which means if I don't let him out, he will just pee on the bed. He doesn't care, he is an old fart. Or he will jump off the bed and pee on the carpet. Either way he is gonna pee. So I have to get up and let him out. After which he decides it is now morning and will not go back to sleep. Which means I cannot go back to sleep.

I am trying to put him in his cage after his morning wakeup which is in the kitchen, hoping to get a couple hours of sleep. So far it is sort of working. He will bang around in his cage for a while and then lay down. but then about an hour later (which is still about 40 minutes before I have to get up and I have JUST managed to fall asleep again after his first waking me up) he starts whining and barking to be let out.

Behold, the face of evil:


24788You're evil. You should know your own kind.

TheWall
11-07-2017, 03:36 PM
You're evil. You should know your own kind.

He ain't evil he's chaotic good.

tabibito
11-07-2017, 11:17 PM
only humans that have reached a certain development stage(formal operational thought? Except that someone can become a Christian while still in the Concrete operations stage...) are capable of choosing good or evil.

Obviously, you haven't met Pyfillun.
24817

Sparko
11-08-2017, 05:04 AM
I think this thread doesn't belong in animal husbandry!

Animals can't get married! It's against the law!

Sparko
11-08-2017, 05:12 AM
So this morning, Taz let me sleep until 5 AM! that's an hour later than usual! He must have felt sorry for me.

Anyone know of any good doggie drugs to knock him out all night?

One Bad Pig
11-08-2017, 11:16 AM
The last thing Master Po saw in his final match, as captured by Hisakata Hiroyuki:

24822

He will be missed. :candle:

rogue06
11-08-2017, 12:59 PM
So this morning, Taz let me sleep until 5 AM! that's an hour later than usual! He must have felt sorry for me.

Anyone know of any good doggie drugs to knock him out all night?
Do you remember the "commercial" on Saturday Night Live for Puppy Uppers and Doggy Downers (http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/puppy-uppers-doggie-downers/3004208?snl=1)?

mossrose
11-08-2017, 01:03 PM
The earth belongs to cats.

24826

rogue06
11-08-2017, 01:08 PM
The last thing Master Po saw in his final match, as captured by Hisakata Hiroyuki:

24822

He will be missed. :candle:
Yeah that cat got thrown clear into the next county as Master Po executed a flawless example of a Tomoe nage sacrifice (Ma-sutemi) throw.


Years ago when I did one as I got rushed by a drunken assailant in a parking lot I slammed him upside down into the side of my car. Put a dent in the door. :brood:

rogue06
11-08-2017, 02:16 PM
The earth belongs to cats.

24826


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mG4VgNbdk1g

Catholicity
11-08-2017, 09:25 PM
So this morning, Taz let me sleep until 5 AM! that's an hour later than usual! He must have felt sorry for me.

Anyone know of any good doggie drugs to knock him out all night?
yes. If he's really having a bladder control issue there is a drug the vet can give him called phenylpronalamine which strengthens the sphincter giving better control. Realize at this point meds are going to make him comfortable and could prolong his life a littleso take him in for a thorough exam. If his blindness is from cataracts and nothing else, see what stage they are, OTC drops with anti-inflammatory properties can help avoid surgery. Deafness, I don't know the cause it could be congenital it could be heart related. If its heart related Keep the dog's teeth clean and see if there is a cheapish drug to help his heart pump well (beta- blockers and calcium channel blockers are choice among vets for dogs, they also control anxiety.) You can give your dog glucosamine and chondroitin for his joints and fortify the food with fish oil and a vitamin supplement for his eyes fur and coat. (best given in treats or wet food or even canned salmon which you don't have to do much with just the vitamin supplement.) Just some things we did with our seniors

Teallaura
11-09-2017, 01:51 PM
:no: Pure, unadulterated, concentrated evil.
Squirrels are, yes, we agree. :yes:

Teallaura
11-09-2017, 01:54 PM
He ain't evil he's chaotic good.Try taking his bacon and see if you still think that.

Oh, wait, I see you already did...

Christianbookworm
11-09-2017, 02:11 PM
This thread needs movin' !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rogue06
11-09-2017, 04:50 PM
Squirrels are, yes, we agree. :yes:
Master Po assures me that no NSA trainee has snuck into the wilds of Alabamstan to clip off the whiskers of not just your cats but any cat for over a year now. So give it a rest.

Chrawnus
11-09-2017, 09:05 PM
This thread needs movin' !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why? This is a serious thread about a serious topic. :no:

One Bad Pig
11-10-2017, 05:55 AM
Master Po assures me that no NSA trainee has snuck into the wilds of Alabamstan to clip off the whiskers of not just your cats but any cat for over a year now. So give it a rest.
:no: The last graduating class attempting to do that in celebration ended up as a light snack for Teal's cats. She asks you to send more next time - there weren't nearly enough to go around.

Sparko
11-10-2017, 06:08 AM
So this morning, he got me up at 5AM again. sigh. And I swear I heard him snickering. Like Muttley.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9o58ypeFFWk

rogue06
11-10-2017, 04:54 PM
:no: The last graduating class attempting to do that in celebration ended up as a light snack for Teal's cats. She asks you to send more next time - there weren't nearly enough to go around.
:lmbo:

You've been smoking some of Teal's cat nip or what cause you be husilutinating big time.

The raids only stopped when I became aware of the tradition of an occasional trainee sneaking over after Teal's frantic calls blubbering about how the NSA had been picking on her "poor little kitties." Master Po put an immediate end to it (essentially by shaming them about the ignobility of going after such weak and unworthy targets) and I sent back near a pound of clipped cat whiskers (do you have any idea just how many whiskers it takes to make up a pound? I do.) and a bottle of roguetech epoxy.

Now those who feel the need to prove their mettle (as only a few of those barely passing have) do so in other ways.



http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/squirrel-with-balls-of-steel.gif


24861


2486224863


They particularly like battling super villains although Master Po insists that I don't show actual pictures but rather re-creations so as not to reveal any clues about the deadly secret techniques utilized.

Teallaura
11-10-2017, 05:08 PM
Master Po assures me that no NSA trainee has snuck into the wilds of Alabamstan to clip off the whiskers of not just your cats but any cat for over a year now. So give it a rest.
Oh, you're still trying, huh? That explains where the extra snack food came from.

Teallaura
11-10-2017, 05:10 PM
:lmbo:

You've been smoking some of Teal's cat nip or what cause you be husilutinating big time.

The raids only stopped when I became aware of the tradition of an occasional trainee sneaking over after Teal's frantic calls blubbering about how the NSA had been picking on her "poor little kitties." Master Po put an immediate end to it (essentially by shaming them about the ignobility of going after such weak and unworthy targets) and I sent back near a pound of clipped cat whiskers (do you have any idea just how many whiskers it takes to make up a pound? I do.) and a bottle of roguetech epoxy.

Now those who feel the need to prove their mettle (as only a few of those barely passing have) do so in other ways.



http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/squirrel-with-balls-of-steel.gif


24861


2486224863


They particularly like battling super villains although Master Po insists that I don't show actual pictures but rather re-creations so as not to reveal any clues about the deadly secret techniques utilized.
Snake, deer and super villain.

No cats.

Just sayin'...

rogue06
11-11-2017, 12:14 PM
Snake, deer and super villain.

No cats.

Just sayin'...
If you would have read what was written directly above it you would know that Master Po shamed those that went after cats wrt the "ignobility of going after such weak and unworthy targets."


And you gotta admit, that aerial flying mare throw of that deer was flawless in its execution

One Bad Pig
11-11-2017, 01:54 PM
And you gotta admit, that deer showed amazing agility when startled.
Fixed that for you.

rogue06
11-11-2017, 02:07 PM
Fixed that for you.
Bitter jealousy leads to yet another failure for the singular naughty swine.

Sparko
11-12-2017, 06:26 AM
This morning I tried to sleep in.

24870

Teallaura
11-12-2017, 10:44 AM
This morning I tried to sleep in.

24870The water dish is empty, you dope. No wonder he's mad!

Sparko
11-13-2017, 04:54 AM
The water dish is empty, you dope. No wonder he's mad!
That's his food dish.

So today's evil strategy. I wake up at 5AM with him having put his head on my chest and probably pretending to be asleep. Now I have a choice. I am awake. If I try to go back to sleep, I will move and will wake him up and then have to take him out. If I don't move, I will lay there awake while HE sleeps. So insidious!

rogue06
11-13-2017, 07:32 AM
That's his food dish.

So today's evil strategy. I wake up at 5AM with him having put his head on my chest and probably pretending to be asleep. Now I have a choice. I am awake. If I try to go back to sleep, I will move and will wake him up and then have to take him out. If I don't move, I will lay there awake while HE sleeps. So insidious!
Obviously smarter than you are :hehe:

Sparko
11-13-2017, 08:19 AM
Obviously smarter than you are :hehe:You may want to hire him for your NSA. The Evil Blind Sensei.

Roland
11-27-2017, 02:22 AM
hello friends, I am new to this forum and I feel really interested in this forums.The mentioned discussions are quite interesting.I love animals.But my father hates animals. That's why we have no permission to care for any of pets in our home.But The dog that you described is interesting.I feel to hug the dog.Please don't ignore that it's an old dog he needs your good care.

mossrose
11-29-2017, 07:01 AM
hello friends, I am new to this forum and I feel really interested in this forums.The mentioned discussions are quite interesting.I love animals.But my father hates animals. That's why we have no permission to care for any of pets in our home.But The dog that you described is interesting.I feel to hug the dog.Please don't ignore that it's an old dog he needs your good care.


Hmmmm. But you said in another thread that you have a lovely cat that the neighbour's 2 dogs fight with.

You are indeed interested in this forum, hence your advert spam thread!

rogue06
11-29-2017, 12:14 PM
You may want to hire him for your NSA. The Evil Blind Sensei.
Sorry, but the only canines that the NSA works with is the Hover Dog Air Corp.




25105

25106

25107


They utilize them for rapid response and HALO drops


25108

Sparko
11-29-2017, 12:32 PM
So I had a scare yesterday. Taz wouldn't eat. This is a dog who would eat till he puked, then eat the puke. But he has been lethargic and not eating yesterday. I called the vet and set up an appointment for this morning thinking this might be the time I have to say goodbye. Then last night around 8:30 he decided to eat, and he ate again this morning. I noticed a sore or boil on his back that had burst and was oozing bloody puss (:eww:) and when I took him to the vet, she said that the sore might explain his lack of appetite and lethargy. So they are cleaning him up and doing some blood tests on him today and I will pick him up in an hour or so.

mossrose
11-29-2017, 12:37 PM
:hug:

:pray:

Cerebrum123
11-29-2017, 12:45 PM
So I had a scare yesterday. Taz wouldn't eat. This is a dog who would eat till he puked, then eat the puke. But he has been lethargic and not eating yesterday. I called the vet and set up an appointment for this morning thinking this might be the time I have to say goodbye. Then last night around 8:30 he decided to eat, and he ate again this morning. I noticed a sore or boil on his back that had burst and was oozing bloody puss (:eww:) and when I took him to the vet, she said that the sore might explain his lack of appetite and lethargy. So they are cleaning him up and doing some blood tests on him today and I will pick him up in an hour or so.

It might have been a tick. Those things can cause all kinds of issues.

Sparko
11-29-2017, 12:59 PM
It might have been a tick. Those things can cause all kinds of issues.He has all sorts of warts, lumps and bumps on him. Schnauzers are prone to them, especially when they get older. It usually is like a form of acne, but they can get infected and turn into boils.