Submit Your Candidates for October Screwballs of the Month

[jpholding]

If you don't know the rules by now, you've been dead, right?

[Darth Executor]

Yay today is comic update day.

[technomage]

If you don't know the rules by now, you've been dead, right?
Rule 1: Spring ... but never Flag Day!

:huh:

Why are you all looking at me like that?

[SteveF]

GW Bush.

[Bill the Cat]

LDSTrue
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1216693&postcount=107

In response to my saying that the original languages dictate the meaning of a passage and that exegesis is needed to understand them:


Revelation from the Holy Ghost is my Rock (besides Jesus of course) and REVELATION is my FOUNDATION and not your “sound exegetical method. I would not trade my old friend The Holy Ghost (aka HG) in for a ton of your method! No make that 10 to the millionth power. No make that 10 to the …!

And the beauty of SOLID GOLD!!



Jesus didn't speak English, and neither did Matthew write in English.

to which LDSTrue replied:

I know, but the Holy Ghost DOES!!! (aka HG) (aka my Old Friend)!!!!!!!!!!

:rofl: That's the most ostrich head in the sand comment I've ever seen...

[Cynic Sage]

Lazy Agnostic gives a "psychological profile" of JP, right in the same post where he said he wouldn't:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1217618#post1217618

I won't offer a psychological profile of JP but to characterize him as elitist is an understatement of great magnitude.

His underlying sense of inadequacy, though, compels him to his daily raison d'etre: the search for pale comparison. He is utterly un-equipped to live without insult and derision. He won't stop it for Christ or anyone; he can't.

Though his brand of comportment is eschewed by widely-respected apologists, he will declare that any Christian who fails to condone his actions, is worshipping a false Christ. He will compose reams of rationalization to cling to his insults. JP holds himself accountable to no one; he declares he has no need for growth.

It is apparent JP has not yet yielded his ego to a noble embrace of faith. It is his intellect he worships so frequently and so fervently.

He has talents which could be beneficial to Christianity. Don't let his intellectual bullying deter you from giving him occasional reminders which prod him toward wisdom. Perhaps you could have a trusted pastor offer to speak with him.

I look forward to the day when I can consider JP an honorable man. I suspect that day is far off.

Is even a little consistency too much to expect from this guy.

[Darth Executor]

LakeGeorgeMan, for hilarious irony:

You probably don't have enough humility to deal with that basic fact. I understand, it takes some getting used to.

You probably don't have enough humility to deal with that basic fact. I understand, it takes some getting used to.

[Cynic Sage]

LakeGeorgeMan, for hilarious irony:



You probably don't have enough humility to deal with that basic fact. I understand, it takes some getting used to.
Link and context please.

[Darth Executor]

Link and context please.

I could've sworn I posted a link. Oh well.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62517&page=3&pp=16

After reading thourgh that thread though, I'm not sure if LGM deserves a screwball as much as he deserves a jaw breaking uppercut.

[Cynic Sage]

I could've sworn I posted a link. Oh well.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62517&page=3&pp=16

After reading thourgh that thread though, I'm not sure if LGM deserves a screwball as much as he deserves a jaw breaking uppercut.

LGM ain't a screwball in that. I don't think Vance should've mentioned her name.

[Cynic Sage]

POST DELORTED!


Misunderstanding, my bad. :blush:

[Darth Executor]

I don't think Vance should've mentioned her name.

Why does it matter? It's not like people are gonna figure out how to track her down to tell her how some guy named "Vance" on tweb is having a crisis of faith over her imminent demise. And it does not justify the fact that LGM was kicking somebody when they're down.

[jpholding]

Email I just got too good to keep....

*****

JEHOVAH UNMASKED!
The True Identity of the Bible-God Revealed

The author, Nathaniel J. Merritt, has been hitchhiking his way to Enlightenment since he was a teen. Becoming a Jehovah's Witness at age 15, he was later shunned by them at 19 for smoking pot and having sex. Later in 1973, he was born again as a Jesus Freak. This spiritual renewal led him to become a Baptist minister in 1980, where he remained for 15 years. Then he dove into the deep waters of Zen Buddhism, and even became a Buddhist priest. After 10 years, he returned to Christianity, but some say he returned as a heretic and blasphemer...
This book is the culmination of all his seeking and study. In this book, Merritt draws back the curtain on an ancient mysterious, spiritual path that the Catholic church has suppressed since Christianity began. Keeping it light and easy to read, the author takes the reader down the rabbit hole of the real Matrix, and turns the world upside down and inside out. Discover for yourself the lies of God in the Garden of Eden, and the Truth told by the Serpent.
http://www.lulu.com/mojavenate

[jpholding]

Also, another letter too good to keep. It's also rather disgusting in a way, given the stench of political correctness.


I have read and studied some of the information on your web site for some time and would like to make some comments.

First let me mention that I’ve been a Christian for 17 years and although through a long and painful process I have become more and more of a skeptic, I still believe some of the core of the Christian doctrines and I truly hope that there may be a legitimate answer to many of my doubts. I came across your site because of the exchanges and debates between you and some unbelievers on the Internet which I have read in hopes of finding answers to the problems I see in Christianity. Your site has many good articles and in-depth apologetics but much of it is presented in a manner that makes it ineffective with some of your audience. Let me elaborate. Your tone is too often sarcastic and prone to insults; name calling and parodies of your opponent’s opinions. You paint a caricature of much of what skeptics say and try to destroy their arguments with a mixture of scholarly research and childish insults. I have tried many times to read more of what you have to share as again, much of it is pretty good, but it is a nightmare having to struggle through your sarcasm to get to the core of what you have to say.

Other means you employ are similar but with a different twist. What you find below are examples of the answers you gave to an article by James Buckner. Some of your answers are very good but on these ones you use unneeded tricks that border on dishonesty. There are many others like these. Let me explain:

1. Why is the Bible unclear about how to be saved? Is there anything more important that the Bible could communicate? Why is it ambiguous and contradictory on this subject?

How is it ambiguous or contradictory? Again, we are simply amazed that Buckner had these problems. But it is easy to see why:

You know what he means. In my 17 years as a Christian I have come across churches and whole denominations that have quite different views about salvation. Although James’ question has to do with HOW to be saved, let me expand the question to include important questions regarding salvation that millions of Christians struggle with:

a) Are we saved because we are predestined or do we choose salvation or a mixture of both? I am sure you have your opinion and may even think it’s clear but for millions of Christians (many of them NOT stupid), this is not clear at all.

b) Can we lose our salvation? It depends who you ask.

c) The whole age of accountability issue.

d) Is baptism necessary for salvation? Again, that you think you have the answer is not relevant, ALL sincere Christians should be able to understand and clearly see what is the truth about this subject.

4. Why is the nature and practice of the two sacraments - baptism and the Lord's Supper - left ambiguous in the Bible, and a cause of discord among churches?

It's hard to answer without specifics, but in terms of the idea that baptism is required for salvation, see here -- the confusion is all our own and comes of reading our own agenda into the text. As for "discord", I see plenty of healthy discussion, but I don't see congregations burning down each others' houses of worship over this. Do you?

You again pretended not to understand his point. You know what he means. Your caricature of the effects of the different beliefs within Christendom is a smokescreen, there ARE many views about baptism and the Lord’s Supper in the Christian world, as to purpose, method, meaning etc.

5. Why is the book of Revelation incomprehensible if it is really "not sealed" (Revelation 22:10)? Why are the prophecies in the book of Daniel actually easier to understand, if they are sealed (Daniel 12:9)?

Revelation is incomprehensible only to those who don't do their homework. Again, why does Buckner have problems I don't? How about some specifics?

I would not have asked the question the way James did it, but your answer is simply untrue. There are many interpretations of the book of Revelation, once more, you may think you know what is the correct approach and for sure we can find ways to apply what’s there to help us in our Christian walk, but no one knows really what the book is about. Many bright and able scholars disagree and they have done their homework.


I will check your site from time to time, hopefully one day you’ll clean it up and decide to post more mature, serious articles. All the good information that lies behind all the insults and sarcasm will then be more helpful to those looking for the truth.


P.S. I am sure there are thousands of people who find your writings just fine and who have no objection to your methods.

Phew! PC certainly stinks, don't it? :lol:

[Darth Executor]

JP, what's up with all the morons who ignore your articles because you wrote them despite the fact that they often consist of you gathering the opinions of qualified scholars in the field?

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1220778

Oh, he quotes from "The scholar." Quick, everyone take a bow. :bow:
Please, not him. Not him! :egad:

Oooooh. Link me over to your favorite superhero, JP Holding, as if what he says is the word of God.

[spl_cadet]

I nominate Kenite for thinking that Greek and Latin words for priests make for totally different meanings.



Then what pray tell are Lutheran and Anglican priests?
They are presbyteroi, not sacerdotes. The English word is ambiguous.

[jpholding]

JP, what's up with all the morons who ignore your articles because you wrote them despite the fact that they often consist of you gathering the opinions of qualified scholars in the field?

It's called, "I don't have an answer." :lol: That's the usual from 2 of my favorite non-answerers.

[Bill the Cat]

It's called, "I don't have an answer." :lol: That's the usual from 2 of my favorite non-answerers.
sonofyah here: http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1162603&postcount=1

I can't even explain it...:no:

[Mark_S]

Kenite for his thread here: http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62658&page=1&pp=16

My favorite part is when he delicately guides me into proving his point. (The relevent snippits)

Fit the choosing of Matthias into your theory please.
And who chose him?
Matthias? The 120 believers gathered and had a vote, he was elected 73 - 46 with one abstention. :ahem:
Which was all of them. So democracy took over where Jesus Himself had before made the choice.
Oh boy..... Sorry, I was being sarcastic....
Not sarcastic. Hallucinating.

Unbelievable.

[Lazy Agnostic]

Also, another letter too good to keep. It's also rather disgusting in a way, given the stench of political correctness.Phew! PC certainly stinks, don't it? :lol:Oh, I don't know. He seems to be another reasonable, stable Christian who suspects you are a dishonest distracting detriment to Christianity.

Put him in touch with me, please.

[Lazy Agnostic]

JP, what's up with all the morons who ignore your articles because you wrote them despite the fact that they often consist of you gathering the opinions of qualified scholars in the field? And what does Mr Holding say when it is mentioned that widely-respected apologists view his brand of comportment as undignified and un-Christian?

[Lazy Agnostic]

I'm not sure if LGM deserves a screwball as much as he deserves a jaw breaking uppercut.There's a man with some Holy Spirit wisdom.

[Cynic Sage]

Oh, I don't know. He seems to be another reasonable, stable Christian who suspects you are a dishonest distracting detriment to Christianity.

Put him in touch with me, please.

Pfft. The letter sounds like you wrote it. That guy just kept whining that people disagree with each other therefore why bother to look for truth.

Can we lose our salvation? It depends who you ask.

It is "seekers" like that I find utterly disgusting. Instead of actually analyzing the information and forming a counter argument. They simply spew out "There are xtians/athiests/whatevers who disagree with you on the subject" and leave it at that. They are called "seekers" of truth but will jump through hoops and swim through crocodile-infested waters to avoid making any attempt to know the truth.

[Darth Executor]

And what does Mr Holding say when it is mentioned that widely-respected apologists view his brand of comportment as undignified and un-Christian?

That their personal opinion regarding his behaviour doesn't matter? I'm not even gonna remind you that those apologists agreed that his behaviour is NOT unbiblical. Oh wait, I just did.

[Lazy Agnostic]

Have you two been issued uniforms yet?


That their personal opinion regarding his behaviour doesn't matter? So the personal opinions of widely-respected apologists are based on anti-biblical notions? How likely is that?

I'm not even gonna remind you that those apologists agreed that his behaviour is NOT unbiblical. All the widely-respected apologists argeed that the behavior of James Patrick Holding is NOT unbiblical? Surely you can't mean all---just list the top ten of the widely-respected apologists who specifically addressed the subject of his behavior which many, skeptic and Christian alike, find objectionable.

It is "seekers" like that I find utterly disgusting. Instead of actually analyzing the information and forming a counter argument, they simply spew out "There are xtians/athiests/whatevers who disagree with you on the subject" and leave it at that. They are called "seekers" of truth but will jump through hoops and swim through crocodile-infested waters to avoid making any attempt to know the truth.The only Christians I know who may've swum through crocodile-infested waters are the Jim Jones followers. It seems, generally, a good idea to question the words of those who claim to have a divine-anointing to speak for God. There are persuasive purveyors of all sorts of religions and cults. Surely, you don't suggest we accept their well-crafted arguments without incredulity.

An honorable man is responsible for more than coming up with a captious or feasible-sounding argument or a loud imprecation. Look at the life, look at the background of those whose words and actions seduce you. An honorable man who is a man of God should have no reason to be anything other than straightforward and forthcoming.

He shouldn't need clever tricks and insults.

[Darth Executor]

Have you two been issued uniforms yet?


So the personal opinions of widely-respected apologists are based on anti-biblical notions? How likely is that?

The "widely-respected" apologists are not conservative Christians and in Malina's case he does not believe we should be acting like ancient people were acting. Not everything falls under "biblical" or "unbiblical". For example, the bible doesn't say anything about how much TV I should watch.

I'm going to take the rest of your post to the locker room. You need a good public trashing.

[Cynic Sage]

DDW found this in LA's Public Profile (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/member.php?userid=387), and it's still there (although he might be changing it soon):

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1221883&postcount=5


Interests:
Musician. Learning more about myself to help make Christianity more noble.

[attachment]
click here

[Darth Executor]

DDW found this in LA's Public Profile (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/member.php?userid=387), and it's still there (although he might be changing it soon):

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1221883&postcount=5


Interests:
Musician. Learning more about myself to help make Christianity more noble.

[attachment]
click here

I've known that thing was in his profile for ages. Never occured to nominate him for it though. :hehe:

[Anthem]

LA spelled his occupation wrong. left out a 'p.' should be Krankenpfleger.

well, ive filled my spelling nitpicking quota for the day.

[Darth Executor]

Nomination to Lazy Agnostic for implying I'm "enamored" with jp. He deleted it quickly but I took a screenshot of his post.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1222664#post1222664

[Darth Executor]

Lazy Agnostic's jphocd seems to be getting worse.

Good job, LGM.

I was just imagining if JPH were to follow suit. Is there enough bandwith?
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62653&page=4&pp=16

Also make sure to read JohnnyEC's post here:
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1222504&postcount=74

:thumb:

[Cynic Sage]

Teo1:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62485

Nuff said.

[Cynic Sage]

Is there any subject Zipperhead can post on and not be a jerk?:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=55721

I didn't know it was possible to be diagnosed with this condition [Asperger's Syndrome] as an adult. Does anyone have any experience of this?

This kid at college was 18 and had aspergers and he was a complete nutball.

All he did was rant and rave about how much he hated God.

I'm sure God hates him a lot more.

[attachment]
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[Teallaura]

Teo1:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62485

Nuff said.


:uneasy:I'm not sure which worries me most - his post or the idea that you actually read all that... :twitch:

[Cynic Sage]

Michael Cadry:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1220515&postcount=597


In the latter years it is written, "And Michael shall stand up for the children of your (Daniel's ancestors and Israel's children and children's children and further), people and there SHALL BE a time of TROUBLE SUCH AS NEVER was even to a nation at that same time, and at THAT TIME shall thy people be delivered, everyone who is found written in the BOOK. And many of the dead shall awake, some to everlasting life and some to SHAME and CONTEMPT. And they that be WISE shall SHINE like the Brightness of heaven (the firmament) and they that turn many to righteousness SHALL BE AS THE STARS forever and ever." When our spiritual energy inside our earthly body leaves our dead body behind, we go to heaven, for those who are so blessed, and we inhabit the stars with our energy and we can move at the speed of light, but not with wings. Just by God's saying so. And we are a ball of energy among many balls of energy that inhabit each star. And this is heaven, where there are many mansions, and I (Jesus) go to prepare a place for you (Venus). I (Jesus) am the bright and morning star (Venus) and even as I received it from my Father, so I give it to those who honour me.

You Preterists have SO MUCH TO LEARN!! YOU are so FAR from the Lord that you are just Satan's Parasites, confused by him so much that you are ready to die for your false beliefs and you are not one iota of being closer to God than anybody in the earth.


:lol:

[Cynic Sage]

Paul Prucell aka "Freelight:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62630&page=1&pp=16


I would like propose a universalism which posits that all souls and angels(however fallen or depraved) will ultimately be restored to the Light. God must love all sentient beings eternally if He is Eternal LOVE. Can a Father confine His angel sons to everlasting destruction, detention or suffering? The angels are actually higher sons of God than us they being prior and more original creations/offspring of Deity. Lets recall that all things/beings also were created thru the Logos so angels too must return by Way of the Christ-Light.

As far as the angels go....the human perspective(from some writers of the NT) is kinda bleak for the rebels....BUT...such could represent imperfect knowledge and bias on mans part. Perhaps God has a salvation/redemption plan for His fallen sons among the angels that we are not wholly privy about. This would seem to be Loves will, plan and ultimatum.


Okay, SO this guy is saying that because the writers of the NT were human beings (though claiming divine inspiration), we should assume errancy with them and side with his opinion even though he is indirectly admitting that his is is human in origin?


Here we have tensions between the omnipotence of Gods Love, the dynamics and sovereignty of free will among the angels, and certain laws which govern souls relative to their eternal or final destiny. This discussion will be on the 'angels' only (given what knowledge we have and/or can elaborate) - naturally we will filter our logic thru human senses/feelings, etc. - try to be open minded and consider that even though the Bible does not give us a replete knowledge on angels and their destinies.....all of creation is in birth pangs waiting for the revelation of the sons of God thru the redemptive-mediation of the Christ - I see this saving grace covering the Whole of Creation and must include all the sons of God - Angel and Man. With the angels the dynamics, effects of the salvation wrought by the Christ may certainly be different...but of a good and divine benefit nonetheless. I may be guilty of being an eternal optimist, but consider the doctrine of Irresistible grace from a univeralist purview...wherein Gods Will ultimately reigns in every plane,(every heart and soul), dimension and world in His vast and infinite Universe. This is at last....the triumph of Love.


"Filter Logic through human senses/feelings" :huh:?

And yes the large pink font at the end is his.

[Cynic Sage]

Post delorted, already did this guy.

[jpholding]

And what does Mr Holding say when it is mentioned that widely-respected apologists view his brand of comportment as undignified and un-Christian?

The same thing I've said and you've never answered the last 712,756 times I answered you on this point. :lol:

What further ravings come from your unprincipled mouth are of very little interest to persons of intelligence. :rofl: But I'll send Sheila over to thrash you as needed from here.

[Sparko]

Mickiel:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1223077&postcount=3

Theres a place in theologyweb for christians only, I'm not christian and have been put out of it before. Can you explain why that is not racist?

:duh:

signature material:

Mickiel:
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1223920&postcount=19
I'm not a bigot, I just don't like white people all that much.

[Darth Executor]

LA thinks he's joking in this post. I have a feeling he can't really stop. :hehe:

I want to apologize to LGM for diverting this thread. It is one of the more evocative and meaningful threads I've ever seen in the Locker Room.

I was just imagining how epiphanous and growthful it might be for JP. I do look forward to...

...oops, I did it again.


http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1224014&postcount=78

[Darth Executor]

Hmm, now I'm JP apparently. Dang JP, you seem to be suffering from an acute multiple personality disorder much like Malina's. First you're this whiz apologist. Then you're the creator of a web site dedicated to explaining why atheism sucks. Now you're a Dark Lord of the Sith. When will this madness end?

:rofl:


Goodnight, JP.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=62803&page=6

[jpholding]

When he takes his meds I guess. :lol: He's one of those people who sees my name on all his mail -- except for his bills.

I'd engage him for a while but I've sworn off stupid people until I'm done reviewing old articles.

[Cynic Sage]

Kenite, on Mass, Eucharist, and Cannibalism in the early Church:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=22946&page=2

"Unless you eat of my flesh and drink of my blood, you have no life in me"

When did Jesus say that?

where does the bible say "don't do the eucharist"?

'But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions- it is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus.' (Eph 2:4-6 NIV)

But not Catholic cultists. They go back to being unsaved every time they go to mass, so they can kill Christ again.

53Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. 54Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. 55For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. 56Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. 57Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. 58This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your forefathers ate manna and died, but he who feeds on this bread will live forever."

So that was before the Last Supper! Ah! He can't have meant the Lord's Supper, then.

Certainly... so he must have been talking about gnawing off his arm then. Unless his disciples were to sieze him and gnaw his arms off, they would have no life in them.

You've got it. So either the Roman farce follows disciples who were intending cannibalism, or there was a spiritual meaning to 'bread'.

[Darth Executor]

Kenite, on Mass, Eucharist, and Cannibalism in the early Church:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=22946&page=2


:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

This guy has jude3b beat.

[{Tim}]

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

This guy has jude3b beat.
I have wondered a few times if he is Jude3b.

[Rayado]

And we have a winner for the first ever Florence Nightingale Memorial Hot Water Bottle!

This rare and prestigious award goes to Doubting John, for his spectacularly bad behavior in his own debate discussion thread and subsequent "departure" from Theologyweb. This is for the injuries sustained to your intellect and ego that precipitated your frustration with this forum.

Congratulations...you've earned this one.

[Cynic Sage]

And we have a winner for the first ever Florence Nightingale Memorial Hot Water Bottle!

This rare and prestigious award goes to Doubting John, for his spectacularly bad behavior in his own debate discussion thread and subsequent departure from Theologyweb. This is for the injuries sustained to your intellect and ego that precipitated your frustration with this forum.

Congratulations...you've earned this one.

What, so is he leaving for good this time?

Oh yeah, link and context please.

[Rayado]

Check that....make that "departure" in quotation marks. :hehe:

(Wow...that thread was started two months ago. well then.)

[Cynic Sage]

David A. Reed for his Bible Answer Machine:

http://bibleanswermachine.ww7.com/BibleAnswerMachine/cgi-bin/question/answer.cgi

99% of the time it just 404's ya, and since it was made by Dave Reed, I thinks that's a good thing. Do you really want to get your Bible answers from a guy who believes the Bible predicts WW7?

http://ww7.com/

Doesn't even bother forming an argument for it. Just cuts Bible verses and pastes them together.

[Doubting John]

rayado:

I'll confess, I'm sort of addicted. It's a hard habit to break, like quiting smoking. Why? Do I annoy you or something?

I don't know you, but any award given to me here by a screwball, is an honor.

Thank you, Thank you very much.

[Cynic Sage]

rayado:

I'll confess, I'm sort of addicted. It's a hard habit to break, like quiting smoking.

Ask your doctor to see if the Theologyweb PatchTM is right for you.

[Cynic Sage]

The Globe and Mail, on "The Chronicles of Narnia" movie that is coming out in December:

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/Page/document/v4/sub/MarketingPage?user_URL=http://www.theglobeandmail.com%2Fservlet%2FArticleNews%2FTPStory%2FLAC%2F20051001%2FFALL01%2FTPEntertainment%2FFilm&ord=11463562&brand=theglobeandmail&redirect_reason=2&denial_reasons=4769141%3A0%3B4023181%3A0%3B4198441%3A0%3B4667681%3A0%3B3795681%3A4%3B5287161%3A13%3B3795701%3A0%3B4769101%3A0%3B4181381%3A0%3B4737221%3A0%3B4198421%3A0%3B4667621%3A0%3B4023161%3A0%3B&force_login=false

The Chronicles of Narnia:

The Lion, the Witch and

the Wardrobe. (Dec. 9)

Is this the next super-franchise? The series starts with the most famous of C. S. Lewis's Narnia stories, about English kids who go through the back of a wardrobe into a new world, where they must overthrow an evil witch with the help of a messianic lion.

Be alert for hidden Christian messages.

Wow, gee, ya think? :ahem:

As TLM said "As hidden as an elephant behind a toothpick".

[Darth Executor]

When you feel like starting to feal with morons again JP you might want to check out this guy.

http://members.iinet.net.au/~quentinj/Christianity/index.html

Christianity started with Paul, a Gnostic, who spoke of a Christ Jesus who was purely spiritual yet personally knowable, using terms and methods of mystics and the mysteries, and like Paul, many early Christians were Gnostics who wrote in Esoteric terms.

I then check out his timeline:

First Century (1 CE - 99 CE)
No historical evidence for Jesus exists,

No historical evidence for the Evangelists or Jesus' followers exists,

In this period Jesus Christos is seen as a spiritual being or Principle.


Hmm, so nobody knew he existed and had no followers but somebody somehow saw him as a spiritual being. :duh:

Paul shows absolutely no knowledge of Jesus of Nazareth or the Gospel events

Of course not, Paul was talking about cows.

And tweb's moses:


Pagan winter solstice. Also from Horus and Mithra. As was most of Christian dogma!
Allan
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63060

These people really don't know when to quit.

[anewlife]

"Q" ball corner pocket...

Here is a character that goes by Slakemoth (same guy) on Google answers, Real Debates (home of Automaton, whoweepsforkirk, and Gog aka three stooges), and NBC Revelations forum. Slakemoth is also a Sunday school teacher, or so he states. Let’s hear what the Sunday school teacher has to say about the Gospels shall we? Oh BTW Slake is an Atheist (teaches in Church).


I teach adult Sunday School classes (for many years) and have done extensive research into many oddball beliefs and concepts.



Here is what Slake writes on NBC Revelations forum:




[quote]One thing most scholars agree on is that there is no such thing as prophecy, meaning people do not predict future events in a specific manner. Therefore if the author of Mark mentions the fall of the Temple, or the imminent fall, then he is writing just before, or just after 70 A.D.




It is also important to realize that the “gospels” were not written by “eyewitnesses” to Jesus’ life. The books were compiled much later on after Jesus died and just like most books, had a specific agenda and target audience they were aiming to convert. The earliest book Mark was composed around 70 a.d. with the others following, with John clocking in around 100 a.d. Accuracy of Jesus’ life was not the focus of these books. They clearly contradict each other in specifics related to the same event. The power of their writing comes from how each of them weaves the narrative of Jesus, his teachings and his life around the message they are trying to send to their audience.




People also mention “outside” sources that corroborate Jesus, but again they are not eyewitness accounts. I have seen Josephus mentioned, but he simply refers to “a Christos who was crucified by the Romans”. This is no different than saying “David Koresh who was persecuted by the government”. Just because I mention something doesn’t mean I support what Koresh’s followers believed. Josephus’ account in the history of the Jews tells us one thing though, that there was a movement spreading that was based around an individual, and it had enough momentum to be noticed. Was Jesus a real person? I would say absolutely….was he divine?.. I say no.



http://boards.nbc.com/bb/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=159793&page=6&view=expanded&sb=5&o=&fpart (http://boards.nbc.com/bb/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=159793&page=6&view=expanded&sb=5&o=&fpart)=

[jpholding]

Email too good to keep --

Honor/shame? How silly to think that God can be shamed or have honor
taken away. He sounds more like a Samurai or a Klingon.............all
wrapped up in concern over his "honor". Only the insecure fret over
"honor".

[spl_cadet]

http://www.maryisgod.bravehost.com/index.html

So rich of idiocy.

[Tux314]

Richard Stallman (http://www.stallman.org/) probably deserves a Lifetime Achievement Award for the stuff on stallman.org (http://www.stallman.org), but here's a sample:

Get even for 9/11: support gay marriage!
People will say, "That makes no sense--what does one have to do with the other?" Which provides a chance to explain:

We don't know who the perpetrators are--perhaps Muslim fanatics, perhaps Christian fanatics, perhaps both. It is hard to get even with people when you can't identify them. How can we do it?

Both of those groups hate gays and oppose gay rights. Thus, supporting gay marriage offers us a way to thwart the perpetrators, even not knowing which group it was.

Here's another one:

Then we headed for Muro, to see the annual festival of Moros i Cristians (Moors and Christians). In this festival, many groups parade in medieval or fanciful costumes, each followed by a marching band (http://stallman.org/photos/espana/muro-2005).

After I saw the festival last year, I had an idea for a hack: to add a third group, the Atheists. We could make it the festival of Moros, Cristians i Ateos.

My friends seemed enthusiastic at first. They know lots of local musicians--surely they could arrange for a band and appropriate music. (I suggested Also Sprach Zarathustra.) I also began imagining costumes; my idea was that we would dress as various kinds of scientists. The family also connected with the town government, and they said this would be approved as an official part of the festival. However, my other friends said this was too good to be true.

Six months later I found they were right. My Muro friends told me that they didn't dare proceed with this, neither officially nor as a private surprise.

They expected too much disapproval at such joking with tradition. So we did not have a real parade of the Atheists. I can only share the idea with you here.

You have to see Wikipedia's article on the festival (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moros_i_Cristians) for this one. Not surprisingly, it's a historical throwback to the wars between the Christians and Moors between the 8th and 15th centuries. Sorry Stallman, but there were no atheist armies involved in that particular set of conflicts!

(Note to computer geeks: this post is not intended as an attack on open source software such as Linux. I would nominate some of the extremist views on http://www.gnu.org/philosophy, however, if they were more relevant to this forum. Do note, also, that in my first sentence of this clarification I used two terms Stallman doesn't like!)

[Sparko]

OK this is not necesarily screwball, but it is ironically funny:

I don't see it that way. Even if Jehovah showed up in my kitchen and answered my questions to my satisfaction, showed me the that he was, indeed, responsible for the creation of the universe, I still would not automatically worship him. My worship is precious coin -- I don't spend it lightly. Beyond the question of faith, there is the question of ethics and morals.

The God of the Bible, Jehovah, simply doesn't measure up to my standards.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1229296&postcount=103

So he is the judge of God?

sheesh.

[Cynic Sage]

Long Hair and Justified, on water Baptism:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=4306&page=1

I just recently studied the topic of baptism in the Bible and I have come to believe that WATER baptism is not commanded in the Bible. Does anyone else agree? (Also ducking!)
:ddw:

I agree with you!


Baptism was the initiatory rite into the New Covenant community so how do you defend the idea that it was not commanded?

Welcome to TWEB justified!

Because Jesus was one mightier than John the Baptist and he came and baptized with the Holy Ghost. The water baptism was for the Jews in the transitionary period.
When we believe we ARE baptized. We are baptized with the Holy Ghost. That IS our baptism. Ephesians 4:5 One Baptism.

GP is certainly right -- water baptism was the initiatory rite for the Church, as is shown by these passages since Jesus ascended:

Acts 8:36 And as they went along the road they came to some water, and the eunuch said, "See, here is water! What is to prevent my being baptized?"
Acts 8:38 And he commanded the chariot to stop, and they both went down into the water, Philip and the eunuch, and he baptized him.
Acts 10:47 "Can any one forbid water for baptizing these people who have received the Holy Spirit just as we have?"
Evidently the Apostles understood Jesus's command to include water:


Go ye therefore and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit

This is not the same as saying that Baptism is a salvation requirement, as erroneous... Rather, baptism is what saved people should submit to.

Now watch Long and Justy ignore all that.


Paul was an apostle sent not to water baptize but to preach the gospel.

Steadle then gives them a lesson in the proper exegesis of 1 Cor. 1:10-17 here (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=93762&postcount=10).

Keep reading further in the chapter (verses 18-31).
The Jews require a sign and the Greeks seek after wisdom.
Water baptism was a sign to the Jews. Paul was sent to PREACH (which was foolishness to the Greeks), not baptize with water (that was John the Baptist). The goal isn't water baptism, but salvation of the called, both Jews and Greeks.

Steadle then gives them another lesson here (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=93929&postcount=13), which they also ignore.

It goes on like that for a while.

[Sparko]

Long Hair and Justified, on water Baptism:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=4306&page=1

Uh.. Johnny..?

You might want to check the dates on the posts you nominate. These were from 2003...

[Cynic Sage]

Uh.. Johnny..?

You might want to check the dates on the posts you nominate. These were from 2003...
aw dang

[Mark_S]

Uh.. Johnny..?

You might want to check the dates on the posts you nominate. These were from 2003...

Worse, they were in May

[Cynic Sage]

David Icke:

http://www.davidicke.com/

This guy thinks the Matrix is real. :hehe:

[Darth Executor]

David Icke:

http://www.davidicke.com/

This guy thinks the Matrix is real. :hehe:

That looks like a scam site.

[jpholding]

I get queries about Icke now and then. I decided he was too stupid for a reply.

[Darth Executor]

Btw, an acquaintance of yours and a Thomas Paine fanboy is here JP.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63293

Don't forget to stop by and say hi. :wink:

[TuckEverlasting]

Btw, an acquaintance of yours and a Thomas Paine fanboy is here JP.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63293

Don't forget to stop by and say hi. :wink:

Yeah, and he's already on his way (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1231122&postcount=15) to a Lifetime Achievement Award:

Notice how my refutations will be succinct, as they appeal to the notion of common sense in people, while your counters will go on and on, seemingly without end.

rofflecopter!!!!!!!!! :lmbo: Yep, you heard it here, folks - being thorough is completely unnecessary as long you appeal to 'common sense' (and 'common sense', by the way, isn't. :wink:). :doh: I can't wait to see what this guy says next... Is he Johnny Skeptic again? :nsm:

[Darth Executor]

Might as well make a few specific nominations:

LOL, Darth...

It is from those two links that I first discovered JP. I would hope someone would bother to actually read what Paine wrote. And then compare it with JP's analysis. :lmbo:

JP offered zero-evidence he ever bothered to read what Paine wrote.


That he wrote a critique of the bible without having a bible as a reference is reason enough to believe the Age of Reason isn't worth anybody's time. Of course, feel free to provide me with an example where JP misread something Paine wrote.


Again, you mischaracterize. The first part is not so much a critique of the Bible as it is of "revealed religion". Part 2, in which he had full access to a Bible, was a scathing criticism of it's authenticity as the Word of God.

Under these disadvantages, I began the former part of the Age of Reason; I had, besides, neither Bible nor Testament to refer to, though I was writing against both; nor could I procure any: notwithstanding which, I have produced a work that no Bible believer, though writing at his ease, and with a library of Church books about him, can refute.

Notice in my quote I didn't say Part 1 of AR had nothing to do with criticism of the Bible. It did. To suggest someone that has read the Bible thoroughly, knows it inside out (earlier on he was a minister and many quotes from Common Sense are from the Bible) cannot render a valid criticism of the document exposes a disturbing lack of "Common Sense". The fact that his recollection was unflawed, except in the sense (in his own words) that

This is where it gets good. He quotes Thomas Paine:

They will now find that I have furnished myself with a Bible and Testament; and I can say also that I have found them to be much worse books than I had conceived. If I have erred in anything in the former part of the Age of Reason, it has been by speaking better of some parts of those books than they have deserved.

:lmbo: This guy is either working undercover for Christianity or is dumber than a brick wall.

Heck, I think Thomas Paine himself deserves a nomination.

[Cynic Sage]

Allan Jannsen (aka "Moses") show us the bibliography of his book: "God 101 (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0973798009/104-0694548-4813540?v=glance&n=283155&s=books&v=glance)":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63060&page=3&pp=16

Darth, just to shut you up, read some works by Edmund D. Cohen and Sherwin T. Wine, Joseph McCabe, Joseph Wheless, Ken Smith, etc. etc. Also since you mentioned the Internet you really should go to "religioustolerance.org" for a balanced view on religion.

Yes I have now read some of the works of Arkadyia or whatever the hell her name is and I agree with a lot of what she says.

Also here is a list of reference bokks used in the compilation of my book God-101.
Mere Christianity – C. S. Lewis
The Sociology of Religion – Max Weber
Modern Man in Search of a Soul – Carl Jung
The Will to Believe, and Other Essays – William James
Judaism – Arthur Hertzberg
The Pagan Christ – Tom Harpur
The Silence of Jesus – James Breech
Protestantism – J Leslie Dunstan
The Lost Gospel, the Book of “Q” – Burton Mack
The Hutchinson History of the World – J. M. Roberts
The Story of Civilization, Vol. 1 - 10 – Will and Ariel Durant
The Varieties of Religious Experience – William James
The Elementary Forms of Religious Life – Emile Durkheim
The Phenomenon of Man – Pierre Teilhard De Chardin
Holy Blood, Holy Grail – Michael Baigent, Richard Leigh, Henry Lincoln
When Religion Becomes Evil – Charles Kimball
The Rules of Sociological Method – Emile Durkheim
The Selfish Gene – Richard Dawkins
Language, Truth and Logic – Alfred J. Ayer
The Emergence of Man – John Pfeiffer
Hinduism – Luis Renou
The Four Loves – C. S. Lewis
Consciousness Explained – Daniel Dennett
The Meme Machine – Susan Blackmore
The Road less Traveled – M. Scott Peck
Buddhism – Richard A. Gard
For Christ’s Sake – Tom Harpur
Further Down the Road Less Traveled – M. Scott Peck
Cultural Anthropology – William A Haviland
Catholicism – George Brantl
Viruses of the Mind – R. Brodie
The Problem of Pain – C. S. Lewis
Islam – John A. Williams
-and-
(In case these books get a little too dry!)

Sex in History – Reay Tannahill

Oy vey, it saddens me to see someone use such poor source material to write a book. I can't believe that someone claiming to be from the Canadian chapter of Mensa fall for the whole "Holy Blood, Holy Grail" load of crap.

[BronzeArcher]

RP (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1230856&postcount=2):

"This is just common sense. How can a document which only includes detached anecdotes covering less than half of Jesus' life...be considered a history of that life?"

That was excellent. I'll use that one day as an argument to assert that some ancient bio can't be considered history. I could make lists of these silly things to try to make my profs go "wtf?"

[Darth Executor]

This dude (the atheist quoted). You need a Yahoo account to see the original.

I called the Thomas More Law Center, and they sent me a .pdf file that contains print-outs of Mr. Paulson's (aka hasd1973, "Humanist Phil Osophy") postings. I found them on their Yahoo Group (the URL is http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Atheist_Coalition/message/2626). This is the main excerpt:

Why should such ideas be protected from ridicule? I say, Atheists should rebut the anti-Science religious right with their own claims about talking snakes, plankton eating whales swollowing up one of their biblical characters and spitting him out on land, ad nauseum. Then, we need to make a full attack on Jesus. Jesus wrote nothing of himself or his life, not a line of the New Testament in his own hand. All the books of the New Testament were written after his death, not only of Jesus, but also only by the men to whom they are attibuted. Well, Jesus believed that the earth was flat when he went up to the pentacle and saw the four corners of the earth. When Jesus was carried to the top of the highest mountain and shown all the kingdoms of the world, how is it America was not included? Jesus chased the moneychangers out of the temple. And the religious right republicans put the name of God on the currency. The Bush Bible reads, "And Supply-Side Jesus wept "verily I say unto you, blessed are the wealthy for they shall receive tax cuts and corporate welfare." But then of course there is Deuteronomy 23:2 KJV - "A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord..." Well according to the Holy Bible, Jesus Christ was a bastard and a rape baby. After all, the christian god the father raped the Virgin Mary when she was only 13 years of age, and then the all-knowing and all-powerful god became a dead-beat dad who later set up his own bastard son's execution.

He later sums up this last sentence in message 2629 when he said, "America was not around when Jesus, the bastard son of the dead beat father, was living."
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63358

[Cynic Sage]

This dude (the atheist quoted). You need a Yahoo account to see the original.


http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63358

Name?

EDIT:

Found out who it is. It's Philip Paulson.

http://www.thomasmore.org/news.html?NewsID=362

[Darth Executor]

So all of this is contrived to justify your putatively objectionable behavior in the 21st Century?

In the past, I speculated that no apologist would approve of your behavior. You invoked the name of Bob Passantino, who was recently dead.

Please give us a list of several living widely-respected apologists whom you believe would endorse your objectionable behavior. You collect money as a professional apologist and it is not unreasonable to expect a review from your peers.

Unless you feel you have no peers---in which case, the issue enters a different realm altogether.

You also declare that Christians who object to your behavior, worship a false Christ. Which apologists would agree with that?


If he was a Star Wars weapon, he'd be a repeater rifle. Man I love Star Wars.

[TuckEverlasting]

If I were a Star Wars weapon, I'd be a Death Star. :grin:

[Cynic Sage]

If I were a Star Wars weapon, I'd be a Death Star. :grin:
If you were a Star Wars weapon, you'd be a rock one of the Ewoks would throw.

:hehe: Sorry, I couldn't resist.

[Darth Executor]

McDonad's Happy Meals contain thinly veiled Christian theology:

When you can combine the forces of Disney, the McDonald's Happy Meal and Gov. Jeb Bush in one tidy package - all working together to cram thinly veiled Christian theology down the gullets of Florida's schoolchildren - you've got yourself a hell of a plan.

This December, just in time for Christmas, the movie version of "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" will be in theaters everywhere, much to the delight of Christian evangelicals, who see the children's tale as it was intended - a way to subtly introduce the Christ story to young people.

By Frank Cerabino

http://www.tallahassee.com/mld/democrat/news/opinion/12884897.htm

[Cynic Sage]

McDonad's Happy Meals contain thinly veiled Christian theology:



By Frank Cerabino


(Hint: The Jesus-lion allows himself to be tortured and killed to spare the life of a selfish little boy.)

I like the part where he refers to the characyer that represents the human race in CS Lewis's allegory as a "selfish little boy", it sounds like something Clive would say himself. :hehe:

[TuckEverlasting]

If you were a Star Wars weapon, you'd be a rock one of the Ewoks would throw.

Hey! :glare: If you're gonna make me something ineffective, at least make me something cool and ineffective, like a Chewbacca yell.

[Teallaura]

Hey! :glare: If you're gonna make me something ineffective, at least make me something cool and ineffective, like a Chewbacca yell.
:whistle: Could have been that pipe Luke tried to stop the garbage disposal with....

[Darth Executor]

Doubting John begging for a POTD nomination:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1233231&postcount=10

[Doubting John]

Doubting John begging for a POTD nomination:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1233231&postcount=10

Begging? Is that what I did there? Hmm. Nope. I was merely pointing out a pretty good post. And it seems to have worked too. Now that you have just nominated me for being a screwball, more people will go to that post and read it. People who donate to JP will go read it. And that can ONLY be good! I recommend that everyone reads that post, whether it's nominated or not makes no difference to me, but surely the curious will do so, and that can only mean that what I write is read by the people who donate to JP.

Hmmm. "I like it, I love it, I want some more of it..." [It's a song, ya know].

"Thank you, Thank you very much." --From the still very much alive Elvis, like Jesus.

Have some fun. Drink some beer. Be "nice" like DE :lol: .

[jpholding]

Begging? Is that what I did there? Hmm. Nope. I was merely pointing out a pretty good post.

Yep...

Looka me. Me funny! Ha ha ha. Ha ha.

[Doubting John]

Yep...

Looka me. Me funny! Ha ha ha. Ha ha.

One thing, no, two things about Holding. Sometimes he's just too funny, and I like it; I really do. Now for the second thing; he usually shows up when he feels threatened, which is even more reason to read that post. :lol:

[jpholding]

One thing, no, two things about Holding. Sometimes he's just too funny, and I like it; I really do. Now for the second thing; he usually shows up when he feels threatened, which is even more reason to read that post. :lol:

Better yet, I have psychic powers that tell me when a threatening post is posted. :thumbd:

That did it. I'm sending Sheila over to beat you up. :rasberry:

[Doubting John]

Better yet, I have psychic powers that tell me when a threatening post is posted. :thumbd:

That did it. I'm sending Sheila over to beat you up. :rasberry:

Ya know, for all of your ignorance and arrogance, I think I like you..... :kiss:

[One Bad Pig]

Begging? Is that what I did there? Hmm. Nope.
Yep. You also more or less called Jaltus a liar.

I was merely pointing out a pretty good post. And it seems to have worked too. Now that you have just nominated me for being a screwball, more people will go to that post and read it. People who donate to JP will go read it. And that can ONLY be good! I recommend that everyone reads that post, whether it's nominated or not makes no difference to me, but surely the curious will do so, and that can only mean that what I write is read by the people who donate to JP.
Actually, I didn't bother reading it. I figured, if the writer has to beg for a post to be considered for POTD, it must not really be good enough to merit a pick on its own (kinda like a glowing book review written by the author).

Have some fun. Drink some beer. Be "nice" like DE :lol: .
Unfortunately, I'm all out of beer at the moment. :frown: I'll do my best to have fun anyway.

[Sparko]

Maybe we should pick Doubting John's post where he says he is leaving as POTD?

:lmbo:

[Cynic Sage]

Maybe we should pick Doubting John's post where he says he is leaving as POTD?

:lmbo:
:rofl:

[Darth Executor]

Doubting John:

The meaning of the passage transcends the context.

:rofl:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1235833

[Darth Executor]

Bagger Vance:

This is actually interesting. If you know nothing of it how can you disbelieve it? Can you at least say that it is possible the Koran is correct based simply on the fact that you don't know anything about it?

You believe that the Bible is the true divine word but by believing that you are commenting on the other religious books that you know nothing about by your own admission.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63333&page=9

[Darth Executor]

Babinski:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63292&page=10

agonistic persons (which means 70% of the world today)


70%? I admit to being a little agnostic about that figure. But then with you being nearly an inerrantist Bible believer you probably view anyone with less than your own level of certainty as an "agnostic."

What do you think of people whose views include some dilution of agnosticism, i.e., whose views are a mix of religious or spiritual faith, hope, love, and agnosticism?

________________________

All great religions in order to escape absurdity have to admit a dilution of agnosticism. It is only the savage (whether of the African bush or the American Gospel broadcast) who pretends to know the will and intent of God exactly and completely.

H. L. Mencken
__________________________

Believing hath a core of unbelieving.

Robert Williams Buchanan: Songs of Seeking
____________________________


Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.

Thomas Jefferson, Writings, Vol. II, p. 43


Yup, he thought you said agnostic.

[Darth Executor]

Taken from the amphitheater.

http://www.newsarama.com/SDCC05/DC/Vertigo/SDCCTestament.html

A quick summary:

Some dude is making a cominc supposedly based on the bible. Some of you will be surprised to find out that:

Israelis used to drop babies into furnaces as a sacrifice.
The Abraham and Isaac story got changed around during the Crusades (not sure how, exactly, but the simple notion of it is ridiculous).
Moses has man sex on top of mount Sinai
Aliens are having sex with human women
This one is too good to summarise:"Joshua was Moses’s apprentice, and the Bible talks of their encounters ‘face to face’—which, as any Greek knows, is the sexual position reserved for man-to-man sacred sex - women are to be done from behind."

:lmbo:

[BronzeArcher]

Babinski:

Yup, he thought you said agnostic.

I'd say that's gold. I'd also be laughing really hard except I thought (actually, expected) that Babinski was at least a little knowledgeable. It's the agon, the contest... :sigh:

JP, sometimes I wonder what goes through your head when you see the same <whatever you call it> for the millionth time. Do you ever get tired of this?

[spl_cadet]

http://www.newsarama.com/SDCC05/DC/...CTestament.html


I don't think that something produced under the influence of crack ought to be eligible. There's just no other excuse for that.


This one is too good to summarise:"Joshua was Moses’s apprentice, and the Bible talks of their encounters ‘face to face’—which, as any Greek knows, is the sexual position reserved for man-to-man sacred sex - women are to be done from behind."

Now, forgive me for not keeping up on ancient sexual positions, but how in the world could you have "man-to-man sacred sex" and be face to face? They'd have to go from behind as well.

[jpholding]

JP, sometimes I wonder what goes through your head when you see the same <whatever you call it> for the millionth time. Do you ever get tired of this?

Just for short periods and usually only when some other crisis distracts me (like the AC breaking). Otherwise I enjoy it. :lol:

[Cynic Sage]

Rahab, on Jesus praying to the Father:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1237110&postcount=175


I don't understand how that is a problem, considering Jesus prayed to the Father on many occasion. Did he "pray to himself" then?


Some would describe it as "looking for the inner oneself". Yet still the product of self introspection. Reflection. Meditation on what to do next. Who gave up the "Holy Ghost" at the time He expired? Who dispensed the Holy Spirit on the Disciples? Do you or not separate the Holy Spirit from Christ? Where does the Holy Spirit come from? Who is He by essence and nature? Who is Christ by essence and nature?

[Teallaura]

I don't think that something produced under the influence of crack ought to be eligible. There's just no other excuse for that. :lmbo:



Now, forgive me for not keeping up on ancient sexual positions, but how in the world could you have "man-to-man sacred sex" and be face to face? They'd have to go from behind as well.

You don't want to know... :hrm:

[Sparko]

Mickiel:

christmas is a pagan celebration, period.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1238269&postcount=71

I am trying to figure out why Pagans would want to celebrate Christ's birth.:huh:

[The Laughing Man]

You know, I have to admit it's hard for me to participate in this because I have so many of the screwballs here on ignore...

[The Laughing Man]

Rahab, on Jesus praying to the Father:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1237110&postcount=175

What. The. Hoo-ha?

Who gave up the "Holy Ghost" at the time He expired?

Nothing like pounding a metaphor into an unrecognizable mess. "Giving up the ghost" means dying. Jesus did not "give up the Holy Ghost" when he died.

Who dispensed the Holy Spirit on the Disciples?

You mean like out of a jug?

Do you or not separate the Holy Spirit from Christ?

They are seperate persons of the Trinity, yes. But they are both God.

Where does the Holy Spirit come from?

A question equal to "Where does the Son come from?" or "Where does the Father come from?" God didn't come from anywhere. He has always existed, which means that the three persons of the Trinity have always existed.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but does Rahab sound like a modalist?

[jpholding]

.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but does Rahab sound like a modalist?

She's someone who changes what she believes in terms of whatever direction the wind blows for her that day.

Meanwhile, email too good to keep:

[Darth Executor]

Hmm, I spend a few minutes on gamefaqs and run into this (in a Christianity pro/con topic)


Cons:
-You hate videogames, they kill people.
-You hate the hip-hop, it has to much drugs and sex in it.
-You hate the rock, it is Satan spawn.
-Your automatically sent to hell
-Your afraid of your God, and do not embrace him
-Half the world calls you an infidel
-Your a Christian
-You deny concrete evidence
-The Sun revolves around the world
-The World was created 4400 years ago, give or take.

Pros:
-Theres so many of you, its not funny
-You run everything
-Your God might, just might, kill all of your faily, inflict you with boils, and take all of your money, just to prove something to the Devil. You will get them back, maybe.
-You just <censored> someone related to you.


edit: btw, I reread the first half of the Age of Reason and scanned through half of it looking for biblical references. Paine butchered more than half of them (many of which quite well known and difficult to mess up) yet somehow managed to memorize something as obscure as a verse from Jeremiah...

[Cynic Sage]

Wiltex (article by Michael Forsyth), on communion with demons for fun and profit:

http://tv.yahoo.com/news/wwn/20051013/112921560003.html

...

"About 95 percent of what demons say should be ignored -- for example, if they tell you to drown your children," explains Albert Wiltex, author of the upcoming book, How to Use Demonic Chatter to Improve Your Life.

...

Wiltex, a former exorcist, says his approach evolved out of an analysis of hundreds of hours of audiotapes of his sessions with possessed people.

"Most of what the demons said was blasphemous gibberish," he reveals. "But I also found intriguing nuggets of information -- including the names of hot companies like Microsoft long before they existed."

...

Here, are some tips on tricking demons into spilling the beans:

1 STRING THE DEMON ALONG -- If the evil entity asks you to sell your soul to Satan, feign interest to keep it talking as long as possible.

2 FOLLOW UP ON CLUES -- If the demon promises that surrendering to Lucifer will make you the richest person in the world in 10 years, nonchalantly ask who the second richest will be then.

"Later do an Internet search for the name," suggests Wiltex. "If you find it's a young entrepreneur, invest in his fledgling business."

3 PRAISE FOLKS YOU WANT TO SNOOP ON -- If you tell the demon your boss is an "upstanding Christian" who says the Devil is full of lies, the demon might shoot back, "He's boinking Judy in accounting" -- a useful fact to have in your pocket next time you ask for a raise.

"If you praise your daughter's morals, the demon may inform you that she smokes pot," says the expert.

4 ALWAYS CORROBORATE -- "If the demon says your wife is cheating on you, don't take it as gospel," says Wiltex. "Before you go for your shotgun, hire a private detective to make sure."


:lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo::lmbo:

[Teallaura]

:twitch:

[Sparko]

Wiltex (article by Michael Forsyth), on communion with demons for fun and profit:

http://tv.yahoo.com/news/wwn/20051013/112921560003.html

[BOX]...

"About 95 percent of what demons say should be ignored -- for example, if they tell you to drown your children," explains Albert Wiltex, author of the upcoming book, How to Use Demonic Chatter to Improve Your Life.

...


Uh, that's from the WEEKLY WORLD NEWS. Kinda one of those checkout line rags, like national enquirer. The whole thing is tongue-in-cheek satire.

You should go look up their article on the rapture! It's a hoot.

http://weeklyworldnews.com/features/religion/10628

You can be one of the lucky people taken up in the Rapture -- and avoid the horrors of the Apocalypse -- by following the tips of a top Bible expert!

...

SPEND PLENTY OF TIME OUTDOORS -- You want to be outside when the Rapture begins and the powerful beam begins to pull you physically up toward Heaven. Otherwise you could hit a ceiling and end up stuck down here with the other poor unfortunates...

[Darth Executor]

More from gamefaqs:
If God or Jesus appeared before you and told you that incest was OK how many of you would honestly start sleep with your cousins, sisters, aunts whatever



Uh, the Bible already says it's ok.

I mean, God made man and women, and Eve was Adam's daughter, and he <censored> her to create a bunch of kids, who intermingled and made more babies, etc.

And God, the Father of all mankind gave the <censored> to Mary, and she made Super Jesus.

And I saw an episode of X-Files with incest, and thigns were jsut fine.

[Sparko]

More from gamefaqs:

Gee no wonder Ninja's beat him up.

Apparently he never wondered why both his parents had the same last name before they got married.

[Teallaura]

Hey! He used X-files as his reference! What more proof do you want? :brood:











:twitch: I gotta stop reading this thread... :hrm: Dang, how many of these loonies are there? :noid:

[jpholding]

:twitch: I gotta stop reading this thread... :hrm: Dang, how many of these loonies are there? :noid:

Kajillions.

I just looked over the old Screwball feature and its been getting larger every month.

At the current rate of growth, every person on earth (6 billion plus) will be honored with a Screwball Award in the October 2046 edition. :uneasy:

[Sparko]

Kajillions.

I just looked over the old Screwball feature and its been getting larger every month.

At the current rate of growth, every person on earth (6 billion plus) will be honored with a Screwball Award in the October 2046 edition. :uneasy:

That's just screwy. :lolo:

[Shadow Phoenix]

Do we have anyone who is on the permenant screwball list every month just because they're still around?

JP. Not sure if you've considered it, but maybe you should take some highlights and towards the end of December have some voting for the Screwballs of the year.

[jpholding]

Do we have anyone who is on the permenant screwball list every month just because they're still around?

Not yet.


JP. Not sure if you've considered it, but maybe you should take some highlights and towards the end of December have some voting for the Screwballs of the year.

That is indeed in the works, though I had in mind for the voting to be in January so that the year could be complete. My little bro even designed a Platinum Screwball Award.

[Darth Executor]

Hey JP, ask your brother to make another "true confessions" page for next month's survivor toon. The last one was hilarious. Plus, it got LGM worked up something awful which is always something to be proud of. :thumb:

[jpholding]

Hey JP, ask your brother to make another "true confessions" page for next month's survivor toon. The last one was hilarious. Plus, it got LGM worked up something awful which is always something to be proud of. :thumb:

He has some other stuff already, but we'll see what he can do.

Looks like I may get Barker's challenge done now that the AC is working and it's cool in the place I draw. :thumb:

[Cynic Sage]

Gary Cook, in the OP of his thread titled "WHY AM i NOT HEALED?may be a reason here?":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63625

What most people can not understand is?GOD IS 1ST INTERESTED IN OUR SPIRIT.It MUST COME 1ST.If we need sickness to be humble or too follow HIm.Then it may happen.HIS perfect will?Is us healed and having all spiritual blessing.WALKING ON THE WATER!But HE will not put anything,before your spirit or your growing too be like HIS SON JESUS CHRIST!It may take sickness to keep us humble and in fellowship with HIM .If that be the cases with you?Thank HIm.HE LOVES YOU THAT much.BECAUSE as you know?When we suffer?HE SUFFERS.
JUSt as our kids suffer?We suffer
WE MUST SEE this simple truth!We need to get in touch with our spirit,if they are feed and used by the LORd.The rest falls into place.
It has always been the spirit 1st.
I personally think?Everything recieved of us ,given by the HOLY GHOST is auto matic.of course we should or could LAY HANDS ON OTHERS for them to recieve.But it does not have to be this way.As we see?PAUL recieved most everything right from GOD.Even most of the WORD we now live by!We indeed have full access.We count some things above another.But the truth is?HE counts most every thing as important .The things that are best are the things that bless many.it has always been to give.HE gives ,WE give.Never just for us to selfishly have.But even then ?HE will give,But not a great deal.HE is a giver .WE MUST BE GIVERS.We must quit thionking I want.And start thinking,I want! to give
LORD GIVE ME,THAT I MIGHT GIVE IT TOO OTHERS
I WANT TOO LIFT YOU UP LORD.AND LOVE AS YOU LOVE ME!
USE ME BY GIVING TO ME !THAT I WILL BOLDLY GIVE IT TO OTHERS OR USE IT,NOT FOR ME LORD !BUT TO SHARE AND BLESSS OTHERS!I WANT NOTHING FOR ME LORD!Then if we truly believe our own WORDS.GREAT MIRACLE WILL HAPPEN!
Our minds must be renewed to think like our LORD.WE CLEARLY SEE?HE GAVE EVERYTHING FOR THE CHURCH and died for the world.CAN WE DO LESS?You can take this teaching to the graveand still reap from it.it will never be worthless!It is the very mind of GOD!
_________________
Joh 17:16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. (Jud 1:23) And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.

It's like what if a Word of Faith minister got to close to a flame and suddenly exploded.

I hope he practices the laying of hands on his keyboard so his Spacebar and Shift key can finally get healed.

[BronzeArcher]

Someone who's amazed (http://www.christianforums.com/t2244123).

It amazes me that a rational and intellectual society like the one we live in, still believes in gods.

Just about anything the bible says, goes against science and proof. The proof is undeniably true, and is proven beyond any rational doubt. Yet, people seem to turn a blind eye to it, saying it can’t be true, because a book says otherwise, and believe only what they are brought up to believe.

All religions in the world have the exact same characteristics. They simply don’t die out, because people keep convincing each other that what they believe in is true.

Ever wondered why religion is geographically based? Like in the western world we believe in Jesus, and on the other parts of the world, they believe other religions?

The answer is as mentioned above. People believe only what they are raised up to believe, and people keep convincing each other that their religion is true.

To further support my arguments, I know of a professor in Norway, Paul N Dukro, I believe it was, who has made an article on the subject. From his work, he can conclude that religion grows during war and epidemic times. This was also backed up by a psychology professor, who made the claim that we need religion to be able to cope with the death of our loved ones. Or simply, religion is a necessity for our psychological well-being.

Whenever I encounter a Christian and ask him why he believes in a religion which I find to be illogical, he will simply say that he can feel the power and love of god, and that no one can prove that he doesn’t exist.

Seeing as only 16 percents of the worlds population belong to Christianity, the rest of the world must obviously be lying or imagining when they say they can feel god.

Let's all convert to Islam, twice.

[dizzle]

for some strange reason I now want to make the list....

[Sparko]

for some strange reason I now want to make the list....

OK. Just say something completely moronic and wacky, like Xena is the 4th member of the Trinity (I guess that be Quadinity) for instance. Or that you think that Jesus came back in AD 70 or something. :hehe:

Then submit it here for JP to judge.

Good luck.

[One Bad Pig]

OK. Just say something completely moronic and wacky, like Xena is the 4th member of the Trinity (I guess that be Quadinity) for instance. Or that you think that Jesus came back in AD 70 or something. :hehe:

Then submit it here for JP to judge.

Good luck.
:rofl:

[One Bad Pig]

"Yahuwshua is Yahweh" on Paltalk was advocating this stuff:

Debunking the lies and revealing the truths to the whole English and Spanish-speaking world concerning - yahweh and the name of yahuwshua, false names and titles including yeshua, yahusha, yahuwsha, yashua, messiah, yeshua messiah, yahshua, yeshua, yahushuah, yaohushua, yahshuah, yehoshua, yahwehshua, jehovah, yehowah, yahua, yahowah, yaohu ul, christ, xristos, xristianous, krishna, sect of the nazarenes, lord, god, almighty, messiah, baal-gad, fortune, baal, señor, herr, domine, dominus, master, joshua, and all its associated variations, with explanations about scriptural prophecy and the antichrist and the name of the beast adding to 666, the two witnesses, Elijah and Enoch (EliyYahuw and Chanowkh) and where they are alive now, Paradise, including hebrew about yeshua, jehovah, jesus, chezvs, yehoshua, yahweh, lord, baal, señor, herr, domine, dominus, the virgin birth, michael, apostasy, falling away, prophecy, end prophecy, judgment day, day of the lord, seven seals, seven trumpets, missing j, anson rainey, alcohol, pork, leviticus 11, antisemitism, word of god, word of yahweh, false doctrines emanating from so called "sacred name" groups calling themselves beth or house yahweh, assembly yahweh, community yahweh, congregation yahweh, bin yahweh, and their near-miss names and rejection of the Truth about yahweh elohim and exploring the truths and myths of christianity, christian hellenism, jews, jewish, kosher, torah, replacement theology, yaaqov, jacob, Israel, Yisrael, zionism, legalism, antichrist, beast, image of the beast, 666, abomination of desolation, great tribulation, hell, sheol, paradise, heaven, gospel, with a free scripture translation, restored scriptures, with apocryphal books, noncanonical, the Truth versus the Lie, truth about scripture versions, such as the king james version, kjv the establishment authorized version, and more.

Source (http://www.yahuwshua.org/index.htm)

[Cynic Sage]

Morton Gneiss:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1245500&postcount=11

Personally I think that, in the case of biblical discussion, attacking scholarship is the weakest and most dispicable of all strawmen. In most cases it says to me that the person lacks the ability to contest the argument itself. But attacking the scholarship doesn't refute the argument, it only begs refutation by a more 'appropriate' source. I'm surprised that a non-Christian would adopt this tactic on an issue that wasn't 'bible science' related. I only make this exception for bible scientists because, by thier own history, they are notorious for omiting and fabricating facts and evidence to make thier case.

Bible scholarship doesn't necessarily make someone an objective critic and expert of the bible. Very few people come away from that line of study with the ability to objetively criticize the bible.

...

As long as there is evidence supported to make the case, the debator has done thier job. It's rediculous to think that everyone should run out and get a PHD in every topic they wish to discuss, in fact that notion is fricken stupid.

[One Bad Pig]

Colossians (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1247494&postcount=24):
Adam was made a sinner from the beginning - that is why he sinned, for a good tree cannot bring forth bad fruit. Adam brought forth bad fruit.

Adam was made statally in sin, not (yet) legally. In as much as a state requires and invokes ratification and manifestation of itself, such state invoked the act of transgression, at which point he became a sinner from a legal aspect also.
[Then God created sin. Sin, being a creation of God, is then also classed as "very good."
Yes your point is logically constistent, and is therefore correct.
Such point is accomodated in my having said that the "very good" of Genesis speaks to function, not righteousness.
When God made that which was not Him, He made necessarily a sinner. Such sinner, and the sin associated therewith, was very good for its purpose: it would provide the necessary means to crucify His Son.

So then we have "I create evil" Is 45:7, and understand that such evil is functionally very good for its purpose.

[Raptor]

Colossians (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1247494&postcount=24):
Quoting Eddie Murphy from "The Vampire in Brooklyn"

"Don't you see? Evil is good."

:hehe:

[jpholding]

Morton Gneiss, for the Ignorance in Anthropology Award:


Did you mean to prove my point? Shame-based systems don't have a supreme power or diety, it's all honor based. That's the whole point. The impetus for being good is radically different.

Anthropologist generally call Judeo-Christianity 'guilt' based, and today that's a valid position. How often do Christians use the line 'but Jesus died for you!"? But the guilt is fear driven.

In a shame-based system the consequence for sin is bringing dishonor on yourself and invoking the shame of family and community. A shame-based system doesn't have invisible men watching to make sure you do good..they instill in you the sense that you should do good for the sake of being a good person.

The Bible and shame-based morality are entirely incompatible.

[Sparko]

Morton Gneiss, for the Ignorance in Anthropology Award:

Something seems awfully familiar about him, but he doesn't register as a former member when I look up is IP. But I get this strange vibe from him like he is all too familiar with stuff around here. Maybe his paranoia is rubbing off?

[jpholding]

Sparko,

The simple fact is that people like Morton, Johnny, etc. are just all over the place and use the same arguments and make the same mistakes time and time again. This is why I am nearly clinically insane now. :rasberry: Ten years of this same crap over and over again tends to wear thin.

This is why I need to spend more time with Sheila and her friends in my spare time. It keeps me sane....

[Piebald]

Gneiss doesn't seem familliar to me... however, he seems to be leaning on more naive skeptical arguments that are kind of "oudated," for this community, anyway.

[jpholding]

Also, another award for Lazy Agnostic for swooping like a vulture to that thread so he can scan for another list of Holdingisms. :lol:

[Sparko]

thebluetriangle, who has some weird bible code thing going, said this as to why...


Why am I so certain there really is a code there? Because I was given the task of finding the code by Jesus himself. It was and is an 'assignment' I have to complete. That shouldn't convince you the code is real. Only the evidence should do that. But you should understand that I am myself completely convinced that the code is real. The most startling piece of evidence was two verses that appeared on a bookmark belonging to my Alpha course director, which a voice twice told her was for me. This was on 11/15/01, a day when I myself received two signs, which were a mystery to me until this person confronted me with the bookmark and asked me what was going on. The words were exactly as follows:

Dear Bill

May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it.

Love Paul


These verses are I Thessalonians 5:23-24 (NIV) and I eventually discovered that they are encoded with the numerical signature of God. In fact they are the key that unlocked the entire code, because they show exactly how numbers are encoded, by the two systems I showed earlier, used in the correct combination.

I Thess 5:23 (o) = 1559
Our Lord Jesus Christ (a) = 1559

I Thess 5:24 (o) = 468
The Lord God (a) = 468

Total ordinal value of the words = 2194
NIV Genesis 1:1 (a) = 2194

A bookmark told him to do it.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1249530&postcount=69

[BronzeArcher]

I think this guy seriously confused truth with belief. uh (http://www.christianforums.com/t2257291)

Now, when I take the position that truth is relative, this means it does not apply to everyone, everything. Some relative truths may appear absolute because they are moral standards adhered to by a large majority. An example of this is murder. Most human beings believe murder to be wrong. However, there are some, murderers for example, who do not feel that murder is wrong. Thus, murdering being wrong is relative to the beliefs of “the majority.”

A rebuttal I am expecting is “how can you make the statement that truth is relative? Aren’t you making an absolute statement right there?” To answer this, one must realize that truth is relative to logic. And who are we to say that the absolute truth must be logical? We would not recognize absolute truth if it stared us straight in the face, because it is not testable, and therefore an not falsifiable idea. If something is not falsifiable, the burden of proof (resting on believers of absolute truth) cannot be gotten rid of, and, just like any other made-up idea, we may safely assume it does not exist.

So, what do I believe is absolutely true in this world? The only things that possibly could be absolutely true are formal ideas made up by human beings. A prime instance for this is mathematics. Two plus two is four. Always four. Why is this? Two is defined in such a way that the sum of two and two will always be four. Of course, if I was wishing to be extreme (some might say consistent) I could state that math is only relatively true when we are viewing it logically, however, since math is nothing more than a creation of the human mind (have you ever seen a “-1”?) it’s truth can be considered absolute in comparison to something we view in the “real world.” Then again, what the real world is only relative to my viewpoint.

So, what examples of relative truth are there in the real world? To exemplify my point, I am going to briefly discuss Galilean Relativity. This is a very old notion that there is no such thing as an absolute velocity. If I am on a bus going 25 mph, I might say I am going 0 mph, however, someone watching from the side of the bus could say I am traveling at 25 mph. Who is right? We both are. It is all relative.

then someone asks what happens to Jesus' father, then in an attempt to throw doubt on JoArimathea, someone else says,

What about that other Joseph, the one who bought a linen on the sabbath to bury Jesus. No mention before, no mention after. He just convenient swoops in, does his 2 or 3 lines, 1 gesture, and Gone.

I know, like, where's the detail about that guy's career, wife, foot size... but this is a little screwy as well

God is said to be a perfect, omniscient, omnipotent deity. Since a perfect, omniscient, omnipotent deity is capable of doing and creating anything, it has an infinite number of possibilities to choose from when deciding which particular state of existence the universe should be. Since it is impossible to traverse infinity, it is impossible for such a deity to consider an infinite number of possibilities in order to create a particular one. Therefore it is logically impossible that God created the universe.

another asks why christians alwas disagree and bicker. really now (http://www.christianforums.com/t2252473)

It might be easier if they all let go of their "organised" religions, and just read the bible without the control, manipulation and brainwashing...

Remember Thinker? Someone asked why Jesus didn't "stick around" longer after res. He has an argument he wishes to share (http://www.christianforums.com/showthread.php?p=19494487&postcount=8).

Now...here be an old argument I used to post here now and again...

Jesus comes back from the dead, visits the disciples, has a bite to eat, steps out the door...

...then gets picked up by one of the roman patrols turning the city upside down looking for him. He gets dragged before Pilate for the second time. Pilate, being a brutal thug in a land known for its magicians (the jewish rabbis of the time were regarded as some of the flat out best wizards in the roman empire) decides, rather reasonably, from his POV, that Jesus cheated death somehow with some sort of magic trick. His response is to turn to the nearest centurian and have him run Jesus through more or less on the spot. But: Jesus has beaten death! He *cannot* be killed. Instead, what the soldier *KNEW* should have been a mortal blow had no effect on him at all. At this point, Pilate decides to pass the buck, as it were, and has Jesus dumped on the next ship bound for Rome. Rome: first century AD - home to two million people, half of them slaves. Nearly everybody of any import in the empire at least visited the place, those with any status had residences there. Jesus, by virtue of being convicted for rebellion (tag nailed to cross) and with a reputation for black magic, gets tossed in the arena. Something on the order of 50,000 rabid fans see him take injuries there that should have killed him about five times over. After that, he's got several thousand of Romes citizens who are at least willing to listen to him. A few sermons, a few miracles, and six months later, he's probably got something on the order of a quarter of the city who are either his followers, or at least see him favorably. Twenty years later, its not just a quarter of Rome the city, but something on the order of a quarter of the Roman empire - call it 10 million or so people who are `christians'. AND THESE ARE ALL PEOPLE WHO WERE `CONVERTED' BY JESUS HIMSELF. No Paul. No John. No centuries of obscurity for the christian faith. (in the real world, the total number of christians in the empire remained at less than 200,000 (less than 1/2 of one percent of the empires population for well over 200 years - and that includes groups that were at very bitter odds with each other).

So when claiming that the rez is too spectacular, it's actually because they wanted something even more spectacular.

[Sparko]

Doubting John
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1248262&postcount=23

Here then are three conceptual problems with an incarnate God, that is, how can one person be truly and fully God, and at the same time truly and fully a man: 1) God is necessarily an uncreated being. Humans are essentially created beings. Therefore Jesus is both created and uncreated; 2) God is necessarily omniscient—he knows everything. Human beings are not omniscient beings. Therefore, Jesus is both an omniscient and also not an omniscient being. But in the New Testament Jesus didn’t act omniscient. He said he didn’t know the time of his own return; 3) God is a morally perfect being, and as such could not be tempted to do wrong. Human beings however, can be tempted to do wrong, and are imperfect. Therefore, Jesus could not be tempted, nor do any wrong, and yet we’re told that he was tempted to do wrong. 4) God is omnipresent, but Jesus as a human being, was not.

Besides the whole paragraph being straw, I think the conceptual problem lies between his ears.

[Shadow Phoenix]

Doubting John
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1248262&postcount=23

Here then are three conceptual problems with an incarnate God, that is, how can one person be truly and fully God, and at the same time truly and fully a man: 1) God is necessarily an uncreated being. Humans are essentially created beings. Therefore Jesus is both created and uncreated; 2) God is necessarily omniscient—he knows everything. Human beings are not omniscient beings. Therefore, Jesus is both an omniscient and also not an omniscient being. But in the New Testament Jesus didn’t act omniscient. He said he didn’t know the time of his own return; 3) God is a morally perfect being, and as such could not be tempted to do wrong. Human beings however, can be tempted to do wrong, and are imperfect. Therefore, Jesus could not be tempted, nor do any wrong, and yet we’re told that he was tempted to do wrong. 4) God is omnipresent, but Jesus as a human being, was not.

Besides the whole paragraph being straw, I think the conceptual problem lies between his ears.

Let's see, four questions that have already been answered so now we have answered the three conceptual problems, wait a second....., is the fourth problem a bonus one? I thought it was just three!

[Cynic Sage]

Why in the world is Jimmy obsessed with DeeDee being obsessed with Xena.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=63350&page=1&pp=16

[Cynic Sage]

Sit back, children, and I shall tell you the tale of the Nanimose:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=64074&page=1&pp=16

Anything with a imaginative dramatic story line, which means movies, TV, Video Games and even books (fantasy, I'm refraining from saying all stories, cause I don't want to hurt feelers), is a big waste of time.



Video Games are childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time. What is there to benefit?

Fantasy literature is childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time. What is there to benefit?

Films are childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time. What is there to benefit?

The Theater is childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time. What is there to benefit?

Gourmet Cooking is childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time. What is there to benefit?

Art is childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time. What is there to benefit?

Your post is childish, and a person with an already developed mind is probably wasting his time reading it. What is there to benefit?

I do say that I have to agree, just giving my 2 cents and all things listed by Johnny EC do not fall into a hardcore believer's life or one who's close to God and is actually childish (personal belief), but I'm unable to list any evidence for this.

all I know is that when it comes down to what's going to be done. Stories, and testimonies don't tell Jack about what a person will do. When I was called to Christ at the age of 16 I spent so much of my time watching certain movies, and getting into RPGs (my favorite is FFX), I wasted so much of my developing in christ time. After looking back at it, I wanna say mostly christians are prone to this, but the things that attract us to characters and stories is the 'glorifying of one person' and 'our need for a saviour' or someone to look up to. Watch Spiderman 2 and listen to Aunt May talking to Peter about how we need heroes, it is that corny and sappy. Stories open us up to emulations which if I remember correctly is a manifestation of the flesh.

[Darth Executor]

This one is so good I had to come back to tweb one last time to post it:

http://boards.gamefaqs.com/gfaqs/genmessage.php?board=400&topic=24280488&page=2
Hmm. How about a famous one? The story of Romulus and Remus. They were descendants of a god and founded the city of Rome.
Jesus? the son of God, started Christianity. Also, read the Da Vinci Code, I am certain there were many examples of the connection.

Romulus and Remus founded Rome. Jesus founded Christianity. Therefore Jesus was a rip off of Romulus and Remus. :lmbo:

[Sparko]

This one is so good I had to come back to tweb one last time to post it:

huh? you left TWEB? when? WHY?

[Darth Executor]

huh? you left TWEB? when? WHY?

Didn't even notice eh. The why is not important. :wink:

And I really gotta stop doing this, I feel like Doubting John. Oh well, more from the same guy:

There you go, making my arguments seem stupid when they are clearly very valid.

The Romulus and Remus story is very similar to the story of Jesus.
Look at the connections --

**


Rhea Silva was forced to be a Vestal Virgin, she was not allowed to have any children and was forced to celebacy.

Mary, Jesus's mother, could not have children; she was a perpetual VIRGIN; Virgin Mary

~~
Mars, the god of War, impregnanted Rhea Silva, and she had two sons.

The Holy Spirit, or God, impregnanted Mary, and she bore a son.

~~

Romulus and Remus were found and taken care of by a shepard and his wife.

And how about Jesus? His birth was attended by shepards, or 3 wise men.

~~

And the must chilling connection between Romulus and Remus + Jesus.

Romulus..disappeared -- his body not found living or dead. The cloud's darkened, and rain settled on the earth.
Taken from Plutarch, "Life of Numa Pompilius" said
"Then a few voices began to proclaim Romulus's divinity; the cry was taken up, and at last every man present hailed him as a god and son of a god, and prayed to him to be for ever gracious and to protect his children.

Sound familiar..to Jesus? And if that wasn't enough..

Romulus, he declared, the father of our City descended from heaven at dawn this morning and appeared to me. In awe and reverence I stood before him, praying for permission to look upon his face without sin. "Go," he said, "and tell the Romans that by heaven's will my Rome shall be capital of the world. Let them learn to be soldiers. Let them know, and teach their children, that no power on earth can stand against Roman arms. Having spoken these words, he was taken up again into the sky. "


~~
I ain't no fool. GGGGGAAAAMMMME OOVVVVVEERRR.!!!!!
Nice try bro, but now you see the connections, and how I am right.

BTW, there are even more stories, in Greek and Mesopotamian fables that show MORE connections. Eygpt too.

I skimmed Plutarch's piece but could find nothing of the sort (big surprise). This isn't even comedy anymore, it's tragedy.

Here is another KO connection that proves the Bible wasn't necessarily written by divine inspiration.

The date of 25 December for Christmas was originally the pagan birthday of the sun god, whose day of the week is still known as Sunday. The halo of light which is usually shown surrounding the face of Jesus and Christian saints, is another concept taken from the sun god.

The theme of temptation by a devil-like creature was also found in pagan mythology. In particular the story of Jesus's temptation by Satan resembles the temptation of Osiris by the devil-god Set in Egyptian mythology.



^^^^^^^^^^^ Egyptian connection
...here is it summed up. I don't have the time to actually go about and research it myself in Egyptian texts, so
http://mama.indstate.edu/users/nizrael/jesusrefutation.html

Yep, he references the ben Yehoshua

[Cynic Sage]

Ray Fletcher messes up on the Trinity:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1251743&postcount=21



This is because the immediate suspicion of any hearer would be that the rez was concocted as a way to restore Jesus' honor.


Leaving the resurrection out of it for a moment, the fact that the story has an underlying premise that God forced his enemies to sacrifice 1/3 of himself (Jesus) automatically places Jesus in a different category.

[Cynic Sage]

Stevie Carr, for his interesting take on the Christ-Myth idea:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=64456

I have had a sneak preview of the forthcoming Mr. Incredible film.

The father Mr. Incredible is in his super-hero home, seemingly retired from active duty, while the wicked Dr. Death and Mr. Evil stalk the land.

The father sends his son to do battle with the supervillains.

For 3 years, the son battles the supervillains, doing incredible stuff, like turning water into wine, or talking to the head supervillain in the desert.

Such incredible deeds worry the supervillains, so Dr. Death and Mr. Evil decide to nail his hide.

They do all sorts of nasty things to him. He gets a right good flogging - a real working-over. They then go back to their usual business of spreading evil.

His dad decides to rebuild him, and the son goes back off to the super-hero home, where he now spends all his time telling people how he whupped those supervillains, good and proper.

The film ends with his dad asking him when he is going back down to finish off Dr. Death and Mr. Evil once and for all. The son replies that he can't say exactly what day or hour he is going back down there, but it will be real soon now.

Audience reaction in preview screenings has been mixed.

[attachment]
click image

[spl_cadet]

Kenite opens his mouth. (http://theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1251678&postcount=2)



How do you respond to statements from Catholics about how there are so many different denominations and interpretations and stuff like that? What all goes into the Protestant response?

When Catholics tell me that there are 30 000 Protestant denominations, I tell them that this is because Protestantism is 30 000 times more credible than Catholicism. At least!

[BronzeArcher]

'Nother from the low skeptic crowd (http://www.christianforums.com/t2260159) quoting Ingersoll

Couldn't have said it better myself!

"No human being has imagination enough to conceive of this infinite horror.

All that the human race has suffered in war and want, in pestilence and famine, in fire and flood all the pangs and pains of every disease and every death all of this is nothing compared with the agonies to be endured by one lost soul.

This is the consolation of the Christian religion. This is the justice of God the mercy of Christ. [...]

Oh, and stevecarr is posting on CF. I'm sure he'll have much more success over there.

[Lazy Agnostic]

huh? you left TWEB? when? WHY?'Cause he got caught.

[jpholding]

'Cause he got caught.

Wow. More pointless blatter from the egomaniacal delusionist. :lol: Here's one of my bro's new creations on you:

[Tux314]

You can't beat Slashdot (http://www.slashdot.org) postings.

i certainly do fight against theism, and irrational beliefs in general. i will fight it with my dying breath, even if it comes to burning down churches. you put me in power as dictator right now, i'll sterilize every last person i can find who has claimed theistic belief.

http://ask.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=166715&cid=13902697

One person who replied (could even be an atheist, as far as I can tell) did have a sense of humor. He caught Broken Ladder's failure to use grammar.

That said, I'd vote for you for Dictator. I like your lack of Capitalism. Oh, wait, that should be Capitalization. Whatever.

(same URL)

Broken Ladder's reply was priceless:

i do not support the use of two sets of the same letters, or "case sensitivity". i'd prefer all caps, but i know a lot of people say they find that hard to read. if you go to ahref=http://brokenladder.com/rel=url2html-3077 [slashdot.org]htt p://brokenladder.com/> you'll see my true nature.

http://ask.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=166715&threshold=1&commentsort=0&tid=103&mode=thread&pid=13902806#13902875

The problem with his hyperlink is not a problem from my copying and pasting. The guy apparently didn't know how to put hyperlinks in a Slashdot post. Another poster said that was the URL for his band.

[jpholding]

Will mods please close this thread as it is time to make up the feature for October.