Rubia Warren
October 12th 2005, 09:01 AM
This isn't just about selling lots of stuff, but about gift-giving too.
Ever since I was homeless for a short time back in 1999, I look at material things differently. They don't mean much to me in that, I don't hold onto them like some other people do. I'm constantly either selling stuff or giving it away. There are very very few things in my possession that I actually would not consider selling. I just don't attach anything to my material possessions anymore- at least not often- it's rare when I do. It's just stuff. To me, stuff comes, and stuff goes. It means nothing, and it could be gone tomorrow anyway.
This sounds really bad, but I'll be honest about it anyway: even photographs don't mean much to me anymore. I wouldn't sell pictures of my family or anything like that, but I don't have that emotional, nostalgic thingie that other people do when I look at them. It's like, since that experience a few years ago, I am almost completely detached emotionally from material objects. They are but a tool and nothing more.
But people always make wisecracks and comments to me about stuff that I sell. If a friend or family member doesn't want something anymore and offers it to me for free, they almost always attach the condition, "but you can't SELL IT, r00bz." or "You want this? You can have it, just don't SELL IT." "Here, I bought you this thing, rubia, cuz I knew you like this stuff. Now don't turn around a get rid of it later, ok?" Or here is the biggest one I hear, "I gotta get rid of this thing. It's in my way. You want it r00bz? If not, I'm gonna give it to Goodwill. But if you don't want it in the future don't sell it or give it away, give it back to me."
Well, why not? WHy can't I sell it or give it away later? What if a month from now I have no use for it? What do I do? Stick it in a closet? Just cuz YOU got it for me? Do I keep it FOREVER??
I appreciate the thought and the generosity behind people giving me things or buying me gifts. I think I appreciate that way more than whatever the gift is. But why, if you don't want something anymore anyway, or you are giving a person a gift, why get offended if they pass it along to someone else, either for free or by selling it?
Why is it that when people give something away, they almost always want to make sure the person is going to use it in a way that THEY, the giver, think they should use it?
People always make wisecracks about me selling stuff. In fact, my neighbor was over yesterday, and saw me selling something online and smirked, "Dang, r00bz. You'd sell anything wouldn't you?"
And my reply to her was dead serious. I said, "As a matter of fact, I would. I'd sell just about anything. It's just STUFF. It comes and goes."
I know that some of you like to give gifts and you want that gift to really really mean something to the person you're giving it to. You want it to mean so much that they love it forever and never get rid of it because they can't bear to part with it it means so much. That is a wonderful sentiment that I truly apprieciate. But people, sometimes stuff is just stuff, and maybe we attach too much meaning to material objects when what means more is someone's motivation and relationship. And maybe at the same time, I need to find a way for things to mean more to me, I dunno. :nsm: I think maybe something is wrong with me.
Ever since I was homeless for a short time back in 1999, I look at material things differently. They don't mean much to me in that, I don't hold onto them like some other people do. I'm constantly either selling stuff or giving it away. There are very very few things in my possession that I actually would not consider selling. I just don't attach anything to my material possessions anymore- at least not often- it's rare when I do. It's just stuff. To me, stuff comes, and stuff goes. It means nothing, and it could be gone tomorrow anyway.
This sounds really bad, but I'll be honest about it anyway: even photographs don't mean much to me anymore. I wouldn't sell pictures of my family or anything like that, but I don't have that emotional, nostalgic thingie that other people do when I look at them. It's like, since that experience a few years ago, I am almost completely detached emotionally from material objects. They are but a tool and nothing more.
But people always make wisecracks and comments to me about stuff that I sell. If a friend or family member doesn't want something anymore and offers it to me for free, they almost always attach the condition, "but you can't SELL IT, r00bz." or "You want this? You can have it, just don't SELL IT." "Here, I bought you this thing, rubia, cuz I knew you like this stuff. Now don't turn around a get rid of it later, ok?" Or here is the biggest one I hear, "I gotta get rid of this thing. It's in my way. You want it r00bz? If not, I'm gonna give it to Goodwill. But if you don't want it in the future don't sell it or give it away, give it back to me."
Well, why not? WHy can't I sell it or give it away later? What if a month from now I have no use for it? What do I do? Stick it in a closet? Just cuz YOU got it for me? Do I keep it FOREVER??
I appreciate the thought and the generosity behind people giving me things or buying me gifts. I think I appreciate that way more than whatever the gift is. But why, if you don't want something anymore anyway, or you are giving a person a gift, why get offended if they pass it along to someone else, either for free or by selling it?
Why is it that when people give something away, they almost always want to make sure the person is going to use it in a way that THEY, the giver, think they should use it?
People always make wisecracks about me selling stuff. In fact, my neighbor was over yesterday, and saw me selling something online and smirked, "Dang, r00bz. You'd sell anything wouldn't you?"
And my reply to her was dead serious. I said, "As a matter of fact, I would. I'd sell just about anything. It's just STUFF. It comes and goes."
I know that some of you like to give gifts and you want that gift to really really mean something to the person you're giving it to. You want it to mean so much that they love it forever and never get rid of it because they can't bear to part with it it means so much. That is a wonderful sentiment that I truly apprieciate. But people, sometimes stuff is just stuff, and maybe we attach too much meaning to material objects when what means more is someone's motivation and relationship. And maybe at the same time, I need to find a way for things to mean more to me, I dunno. :nsm: I think maybe something is wrong with me.