Submit Your Candidates for February 2006 Screwballs of the Month [Archive]

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 02:15 PM

http://discussions.godandscience.org/viewtopic.php?t=686

I went back to a site I used to visit a while ago. Before, I had posted a link to the "Jesuits are lizards site" and it didn't take long for a Nobel Laureate to show up:

An internet tital:

Diet and sexual dimorphism in the very catholic lizard genus Leiocephalus of the Bahamas.
leio is latin for smooth, cephas is aramaic for rock, (Peter, the foundation of the church), phallus is greek origin into latin.

the rock of cybele was moved from phrygia to rome, and is known in the church as cephas, it is a natural radio crystal that allows for the amplification of telepathic communication, which is the foundation of the catholic church, even though they are all trained to lie about it. if you know what you are doing you can listen in and monitor whatever you want.

the test of occult practice is whether you can fool the people so completely they can't see the truth even when you give it to them. i'm sure that in the medical and scientific latin vocabulary there is more stories right out in the open.

i have been watching the catholic priesthood for several years now and know that they sacrifice children on saturday night, and practice "black tantric left hand techniques, for the purpose of raising kundalini", which is sex based black magic based in the belief of capturing the immortal soul of your torture victim. it is the technique of creating a sex addicted sociopath within the structure of a peer group.

i have uncovered allegorical passages in the new testament that refer to tantric technique, and emasculation of Jesus.

the catholic church hierarchy began as the priesthood of the mystery cults of rome. the cult of cybele and the rites of bacchanalia give the most obvious connection to the current indoctrination of the priesthood. they rose up and joined numbers at a time when the jewish nation was weak after losing a revolt and the roman economy was on the rocks, partly because of internal destabilizing by the catholics.

this is an article of a current trial of a priest that sacrificed a nun on holy saturday:

http://toledoblade.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20050421/NEWS02/504210415&SearchID=73227858255385

in the new testament it says that the eyes are the windows to a mans soul. if you look into the eyes of a person who is conscious (enlightened) the eyes are light or have a glow.
a priests eyes are black reflecting the evil sex based gluttony of being conscious in the lower earth based chakras.

these idiots are subhuman, exhibit blunted emotions, no problem solving skills and display the morals of a sex addicted sociopath. all the illuminati and all the other outerspace lizard [poop] is a way for them to make you think that this super race is out there, there is nothing you can do about it because the conspiracy is underway, when in reality, it's just disinformation posted on the net by a [homosexual] priest down the street, and it's pretty easy to do something about it because these retarded morons are scared to death of normal human beings, and when exposed, explode into a cloud of fear. 911 is tracable to the vatican as is aids. if you back them into a corner they start admitting crimes in order to float there self esteem as their delusional self image starts to fade away. the cult indoctrination is so demanding that they must be stripped of any identity to get in, they then harvest self esteem by exploiting the normal people around them.

a catholic lay person is the first level of indoctrination, as they believe that the priest is a viable authority figure commensurate to God, next thing you know, God starts handing out self esteem. each lay person is held in control by blackmail. a priest watches his flock until a person is caught doing something they would'nt dare want the community to know, more often then not, a sin is suggested to them by the very person that records the activity for future discipline. kinda like the structure of the cia.

always IMHO Dennis

the catholic church consists of etheric structures, (thought forms) constructed between individual's chakras so one person can moniter and influence another, actually whole congregations. what the church does is open one for audible comunication, keep the others closed for subliminal suggestion (subconscious, the angel and devil on your shoulder, is actually your priest.) if you are learned, all chakras are open so you can't be inadvertantly influenced. the following is the first paragraph from a vatican disinformation page the vatican posted 1 day after i posted my above 1st post. it is an attempt to provide for an explanation beyond the fact that it just the catholic church involved in this behaviour.

reference: the Etheric Double and the Astral Body by Aurthur Powel, these books will outline the knowledge needed. all the church does is use routine knowledge of physics against people who are ignorant because their chakras are closed.

IMPLANTS FOR A TOTAL "MAK"E-OVER ...INTO A LIZARD
AND HOW TO COUNTER THEM
Almost everyone on this planet has at least 5 implants,( they are installing approximately 10 in everyone as i write this) especially in America..... the Dracs and their other lizard helpers the Greys, have developed a new method of shooting darts in 4-D at us... and therefore implanting people rapidly.. this is my story which relates to others who have been taken over by the lizards....fortunately i have about 3 major helpers who continually help me take out implants or neutralize them.... from the beginning of my life i knew i would be implanted... when i was a little girl my mother would put curls into my hair and she always ran across the implant on my right ear. That has remained to this day.......i have tried to remove it without success,as the implant moves....
Recently because i have been such a threat to them of exposure, they have tried to take me over completely like they have done to many of our leaders...( Senators, Congressmen, Military, Business -Corporate heads, etc.... and especially MEDIA controllers... although some of them are shapeshifter Dracs....like Rupert "Wotz his MUR-Dak name?" ) What i'm going to do is describe what i believe to be the major process to INSTALL A LIZARD INSIDE A PERSON TO HAVE TOTAL CONTROL....MY HOPE IS THAT WHEN THIS IS EXPOSED

a little more, when christ, in the new testament speaks of driving the demons from a person, he is speaking of freeing the chakras (opening them). mary magdelene is said to have been freed from 7, the traditional number in the hindu belief system.

below is the URL where the sample paragraph came from, look at the text that shows up on the google search response page, the idiot that posted it forgot to edit out references to the catholic church, notice in the article there are NONE.

http://www.wiolawapress.com/implants.htm

:lmbo:

FormerFundy

January 30th 2006, 04:10 PM

Starting a little early aren't we?

jpholding

January 30th 2006, 04:15 PM

Starting a little early aren't we?

As I noted near the end of the January thread, I'm going out of town so I had to do everything today; won't be back until next weekend.

I'll have public library access a bit but that won't help me with work that needs to be posted.

FormerFundy

January 30th 2006, 04:16 PM

As I noted near the end of the January thread, I'm going out of town so I had to do everything today; won't be back until next weekend.

I'll have public library access a bit but that won't help me with work that needs to be posted.

Oh, Okay. I just saw the thread and I thought--have I missed a few days but then I looked at the calendar.

Heading out for vacation are you?

jpholding

January 30th 2006, 05:00 PM

Oh, Okay. I just saw the thread and I thought--have I missed a few days but then I looked at the calendar.

Reminds me of a toon I saw once where some kids convinced their uncle it was Saturday and not Friday so they could get their allowance early. :teeth:

Heading out for vacation are you?

More like a business trip, though I'll be suffering in Cocoa Beach. :lol:

Time to load the car up after one more message, in fact. Laterz, all. :thumb:

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 05:27 PM

Reminds me of a toon I saw once where some kids convinced their uncle it was Saturday and not Friday so they could get their allowance early. :teeth:

More like a business trip, though I'll be suffering in Cocoa Beach. :lol:

Time to load the car up after one more message, in fact. Laterz, all. :thumb:

Have fun. I'm working on a Farrell Till dancing scene. Maybe I'll show it to you when you get back. :teeth:

Cynic Sage

January 30th 2006, 05:39 PM

Have fun. I'm working on a Farrell Till dancing scene. Maybe I'll show it to you when you get back. :teeth:

Already done before:

[attachment]

(Ironically, I found it on Jimbo's shrine to JP)

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 06:04 PM

Already done before:

[attachment]

(Ironically, I found it on Jimbo's shrine to JP)

:lol:

No, mine's gonna be better. :tongue:

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 07:15 PM

It's pretty obvious to me that most of you who claim Mary to be the Mother of God are Catholic. You belong to the Pagan Catholic church. For one thing Yeshua wasn't devine, He was not God and He was not part of a trinity or One of Three Gods. He is not God incarnate, He was a man, born of a women who walked the earth almost two thousand years ago and who at Gods command became the worlds sin sacrifice and its savior. He originally came to the Jew first, because it was the Jews who sinned against God and who God sent to be the Messiah to save them.
So, now you can claim I'm a sinner, or non-Christian anything you want, I will say this, I am a born again believer in Yeshua and God my Father. You can say what you will, but all the things I read on this thread is a bunch of rubbish born of the Catholic church.

:lol:
I'm sure the calvinists in that thread will be happy to know they are now Catholic. :ahem:

Cynic Sage

January 30th 2006, 09:33 PM

:lol:
I'm sure the calvinists in that thread will be happy to know they are now Catholic. :ahem:
Linky Linky.

(BTW: You should show that to Jude3b just to see his reaction :grin:).

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 09:39 PM

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=69654&page=4

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 10:27 PM

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=70262
THIS IS THE MESSAGE YOU MUST HEAR ( Acts 4:4, 10:44, Rom 10:17)
BEFORE YOU DIE
AND BELIEVE(Act 16:31,Rom 10:9,1Cor 15:2, Mark 16:16) WHILE YOUR ALIVE
TO BE SAVED (Acts 16:31, Rom10:9,1Cor 15:2,Mark16:16)
FROM THE COMING WRATH (John 3:36, Rom 2:5, 2:8, Rom5:9,Col 3:6, 1 Thess 1:10)

Mark Wilson, one who declares the great good news by the will of God, to those who are perishing; by the will of God to those led away to death; and to those staggering toward slaughter, that is, to those exposed to eternal death and deprived of eternal life; to those lost to the owner “God” and found by the owner’s enemy “the devil, or Satan”; to those upon whom God’s wrath remains ( John 3:36), to those who are perishing in Portland OR, Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
The LORD, the LORD the compassionate and gracious God
want’s you to hear the Gospel message,
Listen, I proclaim the facts of the Gospel message and tell the truth:

WHAT GOD PROMISED THROUGH HIS PROPHETS HE HAS FULLFILED
The good news God promised beforehand through His prophets in the Holy Scriptures( Acts 1:1-2).
What God promised the Hebrew fathers He has fulfilled for their children and Us! (Acts13:32).The message God sent to the people of Israel, telling the good news of peace through Jesus Christ ( Acts 10:36).

JESUS WAS DAVID’S DESCENDANT
Good News regarding His Son, Jesus, who as to His human nature was a descendant of King David
(Rom 1:3)
God has brought from King David’s descendants to Israel and to Us the Savior Jesus, as God promised.
(Act 13:23, 2Tim 2:8)

JOHN THE BAPTIST PREPARED THE WAY FOR JESUS
Before Jesus came, John preached repentence and baptism to all the people of Israel (Acts 13:24), toward the end of John’s work, as he was completing it, he said: 'Who do you think I am? I am not that one. No, but he is coming after me, whose sandals I am not worthy to untie” (Acts 13:25)
John also asks the crowds…. “Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath?”(Luke 3:7)

CHRIST, JESUS DIED FOR OUR SINS
“Sin is disobedience of God’s will and exploitation or disregard of the rights of other people”
The people of Jerusalm and their rulers were blind, and ignorant, they did not even recognize Jesus, yet in condemning him, the people of Jerusalm and their rulers fulfilled the words of the prophets that are read every Sabbath. Though they found no proper ground for a death sentence, they asked Pilate to have Jesus executed (Acts 13:27)
Clearly, see Jesus Christ before your own eyes crucified, (Gal 3:1)
Nailed to a cross, hanging from a tree (Acts 2:23,10:39).
Can you see the horrible agony?
His cursed body entering death for you and me (Gal 3:13).
The Lord Jesus Christ gave Himself for our sins (Gal 1:4)
He gave Himself to RESCUE US from the present evil age (Gal 1:4)
Most importantly I pass on to you what I received:
Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures (1Cor 15:3)
Christ Jesus DIED! (Rom 8:34)

THE CRUCIFIED JESUS WAS BURIED IN A TOMB
When all that was written about Jesus was carried out, they took His lifeless, blood drenched, body down from the tree and laid Him in a tomb, He was buried in a tomb (Acts 13:29,1Cor 15:4)

GOD RAISED JESUS FROM THE DEAD
Jesus was raised on the thrid day according to the Scriptures(1Cor 15:4), God raised Jesus to life(Acts 10:40, 13:30, Rom 8:34). Jesus was then seen alive, He appeared to Peter, and then to the Twelve (1Cor 15:5). After that, Jesus appeared to more than five hundred brothers all at once(1Cor 15:6). Then he was seen alive and appeared to James, then to all the apostles(15:7).
Listen, I proclaim the facts of the Gospel and tell the truth.
God raised Jesus from the dead, Jesus was seen for many days by those who traveled with Him from Galilee to Jerusalm (Acts 13:30,31)
It is Jesus Christ who was seen and who was raised to life by God (Acts 2:32,3:15,4:10)

CHRIST IS EXALTED
God exalted him to his own right hand as Prince and Savior (Acts 5:31)
Jesus, exalted to the right hand of God(Acts 2:33)
...And who through the Spirit of holiness was declared with power to be the Son of God by his resurrection from the dead: Jesus Christ our Lord. (Rom 1:4 NIV)
Jesus....is at the right hand of God [and is also interceding for us]. (Rom 8:34(c)NIV)

GOD SENT THE SPIRIT OF JESUS
God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts (Gal4:6 NIV).
God gives the Holy Spirit to those who obey Him (Acts 5:32).

CHRIST WILL RETURN AS JUDGE AND RESCUER
...to wait for his Son from heaven, whom He raised from the dead—Jesus, who rescues us from the coming wrath. (1Thess 1:10 NIV)
and that He (God) may send the Christ, who has been appointed for you—even Jesus. He must remain in heaven until the time comes for God to restore everything, as He (God) promised long ago through his holy prophets(Acts 3:20,21)
This will take place on the day when God will judge men's secrets through Jesus Christ, as my gospel declares. (Romans 2:16 NIV)
He commanded us to preach to the people and to testify that He (Jesus Christ) is the one whom God appointed as judge of the living and the dead (Acts 10:42)

HERE’S WHAT YOU MUST DO
YOU MUST REPENT ( Mark 1:15,6:12, Acts 3:19, 20:21, 26:20,Luke 5:32)
AND ACCEPT THE GOSPEL MESSAGE! (Acts 2:41, 8:14, 2Cor 11:4)
YOU MUST CONFESS AND BELIEVE THE GOSPEL MESSAGE!(Acts 15:7,Rom 1:16, 1Cor 15:2, Eph 1:13)
YOU MUST BE BAPTIZED INTO THE NAME OF THE LORD JESUS,
INTO CHRIST, INTO HIS DEATH (Acts 19:45, 22:16, Rom 6:3)!
Repent: change your mind about your specific habit patterns of sin, turn away form your sins, turn to God and believe the GOSPEL message!
Repent: Turn away from sexual immorality and turn to God and believe the message.

Repent: Turn away from impurity and turn to God and believe the message.
Repent: Turn away from lust and turn to God and believe the message.
Repent: Turn away from evil desires and turn to God and believe the message.
Repent: Turn away from greed which is idolatry and turn to God and believe the message.
Because of all these sins, the wrath of God is coming.
Please! Change your mind and turn away from sin and turn to God and believe the Message.
God wants you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to You!
Through Jesus everyone who believes the message is justified from everything they could not be justified from by the law of Moses (Acts 13:38,39 NIV)
8(b)…The word of faith we are proclaiming: 9That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. (Romans10:8b-9 NIV)
Jesus will rescue you from the coming wrath.

PRAY FOR
HE IS RISEN EVANGELISTIC ENTERPRISE (HIREE)
HIREE@MSN.COM

TuckEverlasting

January 30th 2006, 10:36 PM

Why is that screwy? Isn't that the gospel? :eh:

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 10:38 PM

Why is that screwy? Isn't that the gospel? :eh:

Turn or burn apologetics. Not to mention the plug at the end.

Sparko

January 30th 2006, 10:42 PM

Why is that screwy? Isn't that the gospel? :eh:

yeah, other than the trollish/spamish way it was posted, I don't see anything actually screwball being said in it. I didnt read it carefully though.

Darth Executor

January 30th 2006, 10:56 PM

yeah, other than the trollish/spamish way it was posted, I don't see anything actually screwball being said in it. I didnt read it carefully though.

That's why I nominated it. The message is correct, but the delivery is :lolo:

Cynic Sage

January 31st 2006, 05:09 PM

Seasanctuary decides to play "Josh McDowell" for a larf and get's mistaken for a xtian by Shunyadragon, getting this response from him:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=70510&page=1&pp=16

Now Thomas (called Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, "We have seen the Lord!"

But he said to them, "Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe it." A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, "Peace be with you!" Then he said to Thomas, "Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe."

I've heard that so-called "skeptics" are willing to believe all sorts of extremely unlikely things without any historical evidence whatsoever. Sounds a lot like faith to me! As a challenge, can you explain who else besides JESUS would have pierced hands and side? :clueless:

Do you really think that some other person would knowingly mutilate his own body just to trick Thomas? That's preposterous. :duh: Let's just apply Occam's Razor to the situation and realize the simple explanation was: it was Jesus. :thumb:

Yes. Actually self mutilation is not uncommon in religious movements. I saw this several times in Latin America among Christians.

Self-mutilation in a Jewish religious movement? Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't the worse they ever did was snip the tip?

Point one) The disciples knew what Jesus looked like. If it were some imposter, the difference would be clear as day. :whack:

Actually Jesus was not always so clearly recognized. This scenario could easily have been worked out by a good PR spin doctor, and a little makeup and special effects.

So I guess that Peter and Paul had the staff Industrial Light and MagicTM among their ranks as co-conspirators. :lol:

And im the same thread another gem from the "LOL-Scholar", Provoker:

Hello Sea:
This passage has been added, or edited, by Bishops of the universal religion of the Roman empire, for 2 reasons:
(1) It was politicly expedient that the dead Jesus be seen as a spiritual king over a spiritual kingdom, and (2) it was necessary to cover up the fact that Thomas was Jesus' twin brother.
The true message, and focus, of the apostolic church was the good news that the Davidic kingdom is going to be resurrected, and Jesus had been executed, to prevent him from attempting it, and Jerusalem was destroyed, to stop the apostolic(Zealot) church from attempting it.
Over the 250 years following the destruction of Jerusalem, the "underground" church became completely divided through the introduction of pagan doctrines which the Romans were more familiar with, and when Constantine brought the church into the open, he unified it with a democratic vote...the pagan doctrines won the day, and the rest is church history.

I can't believe that everyone that posted until LGM pointed it out to everyone did thought Seasanc was being serious.

jpholding

January 31st 2006, 07:14 PM

Have fun. I'm working on a Farrell Till dancing scene. Maybe I'll show it to you when you get back. :teeth:

That's gonna be Monday now. :glare: At least back home for any length of time. Three hours back on Friday then I'm back on the road for a day or two.

The good news is ST #2 is getting inked some. Eidolon helps resolve the Von Lucre situation...with just a twitch of a finger. :teeth:

Darth Executor

January 31st 2006, 07:16 PM

What are you doing? Giving lectures?

Cynic Sage

February 1st 2006, 03:28 PM

Mpromptu/tormentingmentor, the ideological Gigolo:

http://cgi.ebay.com/Send-an-Atheist-to-his-local-Church_W0QQitemZ5660982226QQcategoryZ31448QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

I got these screenshots from Minn (there are only a few days left until the ebay-page is taken down.

[attachment=1]
[attachment=2]
click to enlarge

His blog is right here:

http://www.ebayatheist.blogspot.com/

Darth Executor

February 1st 2006, 04:22 PM

LakeGeorgeMan, for joining the Christ Myth camp. Richard Carrier apparently did as well.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=69536

Although in LGM's defense, he probably doesn't even know what he voted for. :hehe:

Cynic Sage

February 1st 2006, 06:10 PM

JSDileo

February 1st 2006, 06:35 PM

Darth Executor

February 1st 2006, 06:55 PM

How do you know LGM even voted in that thread?

By clicking on "View Results"?

Darth Executor

February 1st 2006, 06:56 PM

Carrier has an account on TWeb?

No. John Powell says he did somewhere in that thread.

Cynic Sage

February 1st 2006, 07:10 PM

Kim Miller and his Concerned Christians cult (not to be confused with concernedchristians.org), which ironically started as an anti-cult movement (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concerned_Christians)):

http://www.kimmillerconcernedchristians.com/index.php

Has a history of false phophecies, and has even tried to start a war between Arabs and Jews to usher in Armageddon:

http://www.apologeticsindex.org/news2/an020219-01.html

http://www.time.com/time/reports/millennium/jerusalem.html

Covers his tail here:

http://www.kimmillerconcernedchristians.com/msg.php

For those of you who do want to serve the Lord, don't be deceived by the amateurish and pathetic fabrication of a continually repeated story that I predicted an earthquake would strike Denver, Colorado, in the United States, in October of 1998. Individuals opposed to me, and the media in opposition to me, contributed to, participated in and delighted in the wickedness of manufacturing and / or perpetually repeating the earthquake lie for the purpose of publicly striking at the very issue of whether or not I am a prophet of the Lord. I am not only a prophet of the Lord; I am the prophet of the Lord, the direct spokesman for the Lord. The Lord speaks to me mouth to mouth, as he did with Moses.

jpholding

February 1st 2006, 07:13 PM

What are you doing? Giving lectures?

Nope. At a school for my secondary job counting agricultural commodities for the US feds. It's a darned good job, let me tell you! :teeth:

Cynic Sage

February 1st 2006, 07:16 PM

Nope. At a school for my secondary job counting agricultural commodities for the US feds. It's a darned good job, let me tell you! :teeth:

"One bean,
Two beans,
Three beans..."

:hehe:

jpholding

February 2nd 2006, 06:10 PM

"One bean,
Two beans,
Three beans..."

I see you've worked for USDA before. :shifty:

(Funny, because we ARE about to do the spring veggie survey, and snap beans are on there.)

Darth Executor

February 2nd 2006, 08:18 PM

I see you've worked for USDA before. :shifty:

(Funny, because we ARE about to do the spring veggie survey, and snap beans are on there.)

Chuck Norris doesn't need to count beans, he just glares at them and they count themselves.

Cynic Sage

February 2nd 2006, 11:35 PM

I see you've worked for USDA before. :shifty:

(Funny, because we ARE about to do the spring veggie survey, and snap beans are on there.)
No, but I have done inventory before.

spl_cadet

February 3rd 2006, 12:28 AM

Fundies who just don't get it (http://p197.ezboard.com/fformercatholicsforchristfrm1.showMessage?topicID=10594.topic)

jesustheway:
"Impossible... there is no way. The Word tells us that the dead know nothing. They can't even worship the Father... if that is the case than how can you justify this?"

Chocolategaltwo:
"So you pray to this Saint who prays to Mary who prays to Jesus who prays to God (Whew) to help you not get a flat tire or find your lost keys?"

Cynic Sage

February 3rd 2006, 01:42 AM

TroLonda whines about how that people that work in the ministry, uh, work in the ministry:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=70675&page=1

In my experience, I see a lot of people severely limited by their personal foolishness, lack of awareness, and inaction in the face of opportunity. Many of these losers wind up in "The Ministry."

Here are some probable reasons why they cannot find a real job:

1.) They get hooked on the free ride provided by charitable giving. Such a systyem of giving is nicely perpetuated by calling their gifts, love offerings, free will offerings, tithes, special gifts, faith promises, "your best gift," "support for God's work," and any other label which seems to fly.

2.) As is easily seen by their gradeschool level of pulpit speaking, these guys are not that bright, and would probably, and most likely have been, ousted from real workplaces.

3.) There are not many other positions where they get to wear a suit, have a title, their own desk and phone, a few people to be in charge of, get special tax breaks, get lots of sympathy from nice little old ladies, can blame a lack of money on someone else, do no real labor, and have some kind of ex officio respect.

4.) For the actual time on the job, minus travel, meetings, phonecalls, and nonperformance tasks, they actually get some decent scratch.

5.) They are a part of a real backscratching group of peers. They never are required to break the brotherhood for the sake of Godly principles, but can always claim their duty to maintain "Unity" in the Body of Christ.

6.) If any particular position does not work out because of personal insufficiencies, or stupidity, as is common, all they have to do is move on. There will always be some congregation somewhere that will like their style of putting on the preach.

7.) A lot of junior guys, like "Youth Leaders," are really stuck in their spot, especially if they are kinda short, or not bright enough to play the Head Pastor game. Nobody likes a short little guy on his tiptoes peering from over the top of the pulpit.

8.) And a lot of youth leaders like to be a little emperor in their special group of kids. It is better to have some power over a few weak and gullible people, than no power in the real world.

9.) If a career church guy does decide to try to get a real job, he knows that if his employment resume says "Former Pastor," the HR people kinda go, ("Yah..., Okeyyy. This guy cannot make it as a preacher, what is he doing here....?") Then they say, "You sound very qualified, but we do not have anything at this time. We will keep your application on file. Alright? Thanks!" ("In the round file, clown.")

10.) And finally, they know after a being some kind of a big dog in their church, they will never get the same strokes trying to be a regular, working guy, having to face the real world.

Let me know if you know of any other reasons which Professional Church Guys cannot get a real job.

JoLonda.

Dude, what an idiot! My Dad (who is a minister), worked in the bush since the age of 14 before he went off to University. What a load of Bullcrap! :rant:

BTW: Didn't Till become an English teacher after he apostasized?

jpholding

February 3rd 2006, 03:03 PM

BTW: Didn't Till become an English teacher after he apostasized?

Yes -- he apostasized first, but kept it secret so he could get his degree in English. He has a bio at http://www.errantyears.com/members/ldjil.html in which he says:

These were extremely difficult times for my family, both economically and emotionally. We were a family of five, so, needless to say, it wasn't easy to provide our needs and pay tuition too while I was an unemployed student, to say nothing about the psychological stress from the religious upheaval in my life that I was trying to cope with. Guilt and shame had forced me to be secretive about my plans for the future with everyone but my wife. When people asked why I was back in college studying English, I told them that raising funds for foreign missionary work was difficult to do, so I was qualifying myself for teaching credentials so that I could support myself in a mission area within the United States. Yes, I lied, but at the time that seemed a better alternative to me than openly confessing my skepticism.

If I did that, jimbo would start a new website about me. :lol:

Cynic Sage

February 3rd 2006, 08:33 PM

I was reading David Wood's response to Richard Carrier's "Sense and Goodness without God (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1420802933/sr=1-1/qid=1139012966/ref=pd_bbs_1/002-7655297-9315263?%5Fencoding=UTF8)" when I found this:

http://www.answeringinfidels.com/index.php?option=content&task=view&id=78

This lack of skepticism is nowhere more apparent than in his book. A person can only make the sort of arguments Richard makes if he has abandoned caution and careful reflection. Perhaps a few examples are in order. Consider Richard’s argument that breasts are evidence for the nonexistence of God:

[F]emale breasts do not need to be large, or prominent at all—as instruments for nursing, small breasts are just as effective, while large breasts create increased strain on a woman’s back and increased risk of injury and lethal malfunctions like cancer. . . . [T]hey are a liability, a needless waste of energy. . . . What possible use such an inefficient tactic would have in the eyes of an intelligent engineer is hard to fathom.[ii] (http://www.answeringinfidels.com/content/view/78/#_edn2)

Oddly enough, he dedicates his book to “Jen . . . My buxom brunette.”

Women with naturally large breasts prove that God doesn't exist? :hrm:

JSDileo

February 3rd 2006, 08:58 PM

spl_cadet

February 4th 2006, 01:02 AM

Women with naturally large breasts prove that God doesn't exist?

Most men would consider them proof that He does exist!

Cynic Sage

February 4th 2006, 06:48 PM

Michael Cadry and and his "Sign" of Christ's Second Coming:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1372874&postcount=681

You haven't said much of what I disagree with, so that is good. When the Lord God sends the sign He will that I was telling the truth, then and only then, shall you believe.

Did you see that incredibly bright star in the south-southeastern sky this morning. It MUST be a sign of His Second Coming. Even the angel that spoke to me was not as shining.

That star is the planet Venus (http://www.astro.umd.edu/openhouse/news/2005-12-30.html), and it's been there for a while (http://www.space.com/spacewatch/venus_morning_021122.html).

:lol:

Cynic Sage

February 6th 2006, 02:57 PM

TroLonda again, this time on the subject of the education of Ministers:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=70675&page=3&pp=16

Johnny,

Did you know that the "Education" of pastors consists of nothing significantly more than reading, listening to people talk, and learning how to talk "Preacherese?" All just a lot of words and ideas.

Some "Education."

JoLonda.

Uh, doesn't education in most fields involve reading, listening to people talk, and learning the "lingo" of whatever field you are studying?

:hehe:

Cynic Sage

February 6th 2006, 03:41 PM

I reply to Jello, then Jello replies back to me:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1373122&postcount=52

Let's try something new for you.

Go ahead and pick up your Bible to read the Gospels and the first part of Acts, so that you can, if you feel like it, see how Jesus taught Theology, that is, "The Knowledge of God" to people.

Can you find anything he taught with words for people to believe which he did not observably demonstrate or give strong physical evidence for, beyond mere words?

How could Jesus give "strong physical evidence" for his "Father's House" having "many masions" or The Kingdom of God being like a "pearl of great price" anyway?

So I looked up Acts 1 (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Acts%201&version=31), and in it Jesus comes back to life, hangs with the disciples, promises the Holy Spirit, then ascends into heaven. Does JoLonda expect Theology professors to come back from the dead before they are deemed worthy of respect or something? :lol:

Cynic Sage

February 6th 2006, 08:35 PM

Provoker:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=70939

Jesus selected 12 understudies from the very anti-Roman province of Galilee, taught them the good news of the kingdom, and commissioned them as apostles, to go and preach the gospel of the kingdom to every person in the world.

The point is, that Jesus and the apostles were converting "nominal" Jews, and gentiles, into "true" Jews(Paul's term), and apostolic Christianity, was simply a revival of 6th century BC messianic(true) Judaism.

The reason that the messiah has not yet come to resurrect the kingdom, is because the body of Christ is not yet a large enough force to take and hold the promised land, and the reason it is not large enough, is because Christianity, as we know it, is not a continuation of the apostolic church which went underground in the last quarter of the first century.

It is currently my opinion that this is the true story of Christianity. The radical departure from the true story, began when the misnomer; "The divided kingdom", was given to the era of the two warring, enemy nations, which resulted from the fall of covenant Israel, and which were both destroyed without repenting.

"6th century BC Messianic Judaism" :lol:

Cynic Sage

February 9th 2006, 05:34 PM

Troy, from the Ultra-fundy forum bliblocality.com (http://biblocality.com/forums/), gives an apologetic against, well, apologetics:

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=124

" . . . Inquire not after their gods, saying, How do these nations serve their gods?" (Deut. 12.30b).

Do not inquire after other gods through curiosity. God forbids us to make such an investigation for this will only lead to following the ways of the nations.

What agreement has the temple of God with idols?

"Nor take their names (other gods) upon my lips" (Ps. 16.4). Even on the pulpit we should be careful not to mention the names of other gods unless it is absolutely necessary for illustration.

The past is totally concluded. If believers can not separate themselves from idols wholly, how can they escape the greatest idol of the future, even the image of the anti-Christ?

The day is coming when the man of sin shall have a living image. Do not even worship the image of Christ. Make no image of anything above, on the earth, under the earth or in the sea.

In the Vatican there are over 2000 images of Christ.

"And not a few of them that practised magical arts brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all: and they counted the price of them, and found it fifty thousand pieces of silver" (Acts 19.19).

Even though they are worth so much money, they were worthless, so the church set them to the fire. Praise God they were not sold by the church so the church might use the proceeds. If Judas was present, he certainly would have objected for the value was far greater than 30 pieces of silver.

All doubtful things must be dealt with! Some things are so plagued with sin they can not merely just be altered. They must be destroyed.

What has that got to do with Apologetics? Thanks,
Kevin H.

It is already explained in the first post, even in the first sentence. In other words, do not move beyond the Spirit's leading to always defend yourself or your faith; this can be an idol for you which produces inordinate behavior. What often happens is those who have an apparent ministry in such work, make so many mistakes because they are overwhelmed by studying one group after another in their assessment of Christianity. Jesus often ran away and when forced with belligerent accusations said nothing. Some versions of the Bible even write in John 8.25, "Why do I speak to you at all?":wink:

I for one have nothing to apologize for in my faith in Christ, so why do they? Christianity is solid and true, and needs no apologizing. I think it is Satan who brings in such words such as "apologetics" to confuse as though Christians in Christianity must apologize for something. It is not the case at all.

Uh, Jesus ran away when they were trying to stone him, not when people asked him questions or made honor-challenges.

When Kevin pointed out that the Greek word apologia means "to give a defense" Troy responded with this:

Kevin,

Acts 17.17 says, "Therefore disputed he in the synagogue with the Jews, and with the devout persons, and in the market daily with them that met with him".

This is not to dispute beyond proper measure, nor is it apologizing, nor is the word apologia in Greek in this verse.

That being said, words change: today's word for defending the faith is not apologetics, for this word is too closely related to apologizing. The English is language is more adept to come up with a better word.

This must stand. As Satan tries to use language to deceive, we counter his deception with language that is more fitting. I can tell you lots of people think this about this word. And I can tell you also, that most apologetics sites are not very good, for they make a plethora of errors because they spread themselves too thin. Indeed, they need to apologize for their taking on more than they can chew. They are causing more problems then they are solving.

Think about it. Be careful you don't come up with lame excuses like "doing apologetics against apologetics" and propagating the same problem.

Kevin once again contends for the Greek definition, then Troy responds with a Chewbacca Defense (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chewbacca_defense).

Defending the Scriptures is good, yes, but not inordinately, nor in a word that comes across apologetically in the English language. Come up to speed! Classic terms are just as deceiving as new terms. Just because something is classic does not mean it does not aim to deceive. This takes discernment.

Apologizing for a false apology is lame! This is Satan's work. This is a self-refutation just like saying it's true there is no truth, using your words, to compare, to show it is like saying it is ok to be falsely sorry for being wrongly sorrowful. This does not represent the absoluteness of truth which is like a pillar; the objectivity of truth is unaffected by your bad choice of words, misreading the purpose of this thread, and the constant behavior of always apologizing with mistakes as we see exhibited in many apologetics sites seemingly apologizing and spreading themselves so thin they never touch anything deeply. At best these are carnal Christians.

You're totally missing the point in your petty self. Do not argue for apples, while I am making a point about oranges. This is belligerent.

p.s. I have sent you 4 links to show you in your profile what you hold in your heart that is not right before God. I do not want your flesh to be excited further, so you are banned. Take the time to review those links as they will be most helpful to you.

Whuh!? :huh:

Darth Executor

February 9th 2006, 08:03 PM

http://www.killermovies.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-385879-iran-to-hang-teenage-girl-attacked-by-rapists.html

Not the article, the first post below it.

shame that these things happen...

But remember those countries are far behind us in bad religious acts... Anyone remember the crusades??

While we might look at these countries now and be repulsed by how they are acting, that is how our countries acted in the past...

and they don't hold a candle to the Spanish inquisition..

:ahem:
Someone needs a history lesson.

However, La Reconquista was not such a defensive attack...heh. Yay for Spanish history.

He'd be heartbroken to learn about how the muslims got to Spain in the first place. :lol:

jpholding

February 9th 2006, 08:34 PM

Provoker:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=70939

"6th century BC Messianic Judaism" :lol:

Almost as funny as his idea about 16th century AD Koine Greek. And the excuse he made when Jaltus called him down on it....

jpholding

February 9th 2006, 08:46 PM

EMail too good to keep -- subject, my article on The Da Vinci Code...

Idiot. Read the book a little closer and try not being so ready to throw it under the bus. Mary's tomb was not supposed to be full of "documents" disproving Christianity, but she was meant to be THE Holy Grail. That's the problem with you dip(spinach) religious jackasses. You have no sense of humor, only read what you want to read and have a problem with dissenting opinion. Religion is crap and so is the whole of the Church.

I smell Platinum already! :thumb:

Darth Executor

February 9th 2006, 08:51 PM

EMail too good to keep -- subject, my article on The Da Vinci Code...

I smell Platinum already! :thumb:

:lmbo:

btw, you need to censor swear words completely (and not with *s either, with something like <CENSORED>) or the mods get edit happy.

JSDileo

February 9th 2006, 08:53 PM

Troy, from the Ultra-fundy forum bliblocality.com (http://biblocality.com/forums/), gives an apologetic against, well, apologetics:

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=124

Uh, Jesus ran away when they were trying to stone him, not when people asked him questions or made honor-challenges.

When Kevin pointed out that the Greek word apologia means "to give a defense" Troy responded with this:

Kevin once again contends for the Greek definition, then Troy responds with a Chewbacca Defense (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chewbacca_defense).

Whuh!? :huh:

Oh gosh, my brother (who is very annoying) holds similar viewpoints. He was actually disappointed when I told him I wanted to become an apologist.:ahem:

jpholding

February 9th 2006, 08:53 PM

:lmbo:

btw, you need to censor swear words completely (and not with *s either, with something like <CENSORED>) or the mods get edit happy.

How about now? Everyone except Popeye should be happy. :eww:

G'night. :thumb:

Darth Executor

February 9th 2006, 08:57 PM

How about now? Everyone except Popeye should be happy. :eww:

G'night. :thumb:

Should work, but don't take my word on it. I got modded at least a dozen times for words I didn't even know were considered inappropriate. :lol:

Sparko

February 9th 2006, 09:03 PM

Should work, but don't take my word on it. I got modded at least a dozen times for words I didn't even know were considered inappropriate. :lol:

If you wouldn't use the word to talk to your grandma, then don't use it on tweb.

Darth Executor

February 9th 2006, 09:07 PM

If you wouldn't use the word to talk to your grandma, then don't use it on tweb.

One of my grandmas says "hell" all the time and the other one curses like a sailor.

Sparko

February 9th 2006, 09:12 PM

One of my grandmas says "hell" all the time and the other one curses like a sailor.

well then if you were talking to MY grandma then. She was a preacher's wife and would whoop the tar oughta ya for cussing or taking the Lord's name in vain.

Cynic Sage

February 10th 2006, 01:14 AM

well then if you were talking to MY grandma then. She was a preacher's wife and would whoop the tar oughta ya for cussing or taking the Lord's name in vain.

Big woop. :ahem:

My mom wouldn't let me watch Pinky and The Brain when I was young because she thought "NARF" was a dirty word. Wouldn't let me say "fudge" either.

Cynic Sage

February 10th 2006, 01:30 AM

CoM is apparently a hypocrite/pharisee for admitting that he is a sinner, according to VFarris01:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=71143&page=3&pp=16

hypocrite...

Also wrong. I know the immensity of my sins, and refuse to claim that I am better than any other sinner on this earth.

By standing on your soap box "proclaiming" you have sins you show yourself for what you are... a hypocrite (recall Matthew 6)...

Hypocritically claiming to be a sinner? Must be like that "I am lying" thing, eh. :hehe:

Cynic Sage

February 10th 2006, 04:21 PM

Troy Brooks bans someone for quoting a scripture about Mary:

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=319

The best example for women in the church would be the woman that Jesus Christ chose to be His mother. We can all learn from her humility and loyalty to her Son.
Who knows...maybe she was instrumental in the development of Holy Scripture.
By her cooperation with God, she helped to redeem us when she agreed to bring Jesus into our world.
"Hail Mary, full of Grace"
"Blessed are you among women."
That, of course is from Holy Scripture.

Peace on you. ....tdog

Torchdog,

This is not a roman catholicism forum of idolatry towards Mary: the great harlot of religious Rome (Rev. 17) who sits on the beast to makes drunk the nation with the wine of the wrath of her fornications (14.8).

Please find another forum more to your liking, since you can't repent. You are a banned.

Dude, did he just call Jesus' mom a whore!? :twitch:

Raptor

February 10th 2006, 04:29 PM

Troy Brooks bans someone for quoting a scripture about Mary:

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=319

Dude, did he just call Jesus' mom a whore!? :twitch:
Has anyone managed to make more than 2 posts at this place? I guess it's also not a good sign when the last post in every section is made by the same person.

Cynic Sage

February 10th 2006, 04:30 PM

A Chewbacca prosecution from Troy on "Why it is wrong to say you are non-denominational":

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=165

It is just as wrong to say you are denominational as it is to say you are non-denominational. To say you are denominational is like say you are of Cephas or Apollos. This is wrong for God does not divide the church on persons.

It is also wrong to say you are non-denominational because that, the Bible says, is like saying you are of Christ, even dividing the body of Christ by saying you are of Christ and other Christians are not under your breath with a point of pride.

What is the solution? It is so easy I wish people could see, but alas, they will not for something blocks them, even as I was blocked for seeing for a time. For over 1900 years the blockage has been most apparent and will remain a blockage until men in Christ rise up to do something about it. It has started with seeds planted somewhere in a place almost none know about yet.

Ever since the first century the church has moved away from Christ by the Holy Spirit breaking into the church through the apostles appointing elders to take care of the churches. 2 denaris was given to the Inn Keeper (the 4 fold Ministry in Eph. 4). 1 danaries is a day's wage, and a day is like a thousand years, so that 2 danaris is like 2000 years of the church history in which Christ and the apostles would not be let into the inns, which represents the church. Just like the good samaratan (Christ) took the man that was half dead (sinner) on the samaratan's beast (the cross) to the inn with the good samaratan.

For 2000 years Christ has been trying to break into the church which He was once, in the first century, when the apostles appointed elders to take care of the local churches. e.g. church of Ephesus in the churches of Asia Minor or the church of Jerusalem in the churches of Judea or the church of Dallas in the churches of Texas.

The devil does not want this information to get out! It threatens his very life with the soon return of Christ. Christ will not return until the relationship of the apostles and the elders is restored.

:huh:

Cynic Sage

February 10th 2006, 05:30 PM

Troy gets upset that he was banned from Christianforums:

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=72

christianforums.com is not Christian though it is the largest forum on the internet today claiming to be Christian. It operates in the outward appearance of the kingdom of heaven, but its owner is not a born-again Christian, for he has no desire to accept authority in God's kingdom and will ban those with authority. Give me an opportunity to prove this by reading the rest and accept what God says, we shall know them by their fruit.

I have been banned no less than thirty times from this forum with no valid reason. Sometimes I am banned after 10 posts, other times after 150 posts. There is no consistency, except for one. Once they realize it is me, by my IP address, the banning takes place; and now, I am unable to even view the forum at all.

...

Experientially, I know what people do. They will fabricate all kinds of accusations and sin bearing false witness. Those who have over a thousand posts and contribute financially to christianforums.com, called Site Supporters, have much such by their funds who gets removed, even when they are not bred as moderators by Erwin, its owner. That is what has happened. This is the way the world works. This is how Satan tries to enter into the kingdom of heaven and work his wiles. Let us not think otherwise. Notice on this forum every second or third post has an advertisement in between.

Do not take this lightly. It is a real problem. It will not get better. It will only get worse. One wonders what Satan's next ploy will be. I can see him using christianforums.com in a more substantial way against the Church. Time will reveal this.

When people get banned it is for one of two reasons: 1) either the person being banned is wrong and deserves to be banned, or 2) the person being banned is right, but the banner does not want to accept this truth revealed, so the banner bans the person to cover up the truth so the banner can remain in their flesh, so they think.

That loud explosion in the distance was every irony meter in the world exploding. :bomb:

Troy, I have lurked this forum for a bit, but i've noticed you ban EVERY person that does not support your belief.

Now tell me is this a discussion board? Or an online cult?

A cult is a high control group where apposing views is shunned.
For once forget your an administrator, with "banning" power, please open up your mind to other views and examine what you think is "truth", being closed minded is certainly not going to get you anywhere!

Do you realize you sinned bearing false witness? I have not banned everyone who disagrees with me, otherwise you would see only profiles that said Yes to all 17 questions. People are banned for belligerency and obstinacy. Opposing views here are not banned on their disagreement. You can see when I ban someone it is not for that reason.

Okay, so when Troy breaks forum rules by starting multiple accounts and gets banned, the mods are afraid of his "Truth" and "Authority", when Troy bans someone for being "obstinate", they "hate truth" and deserve to be banned.:lolo:

Cynic Sage

February 10th 2006, 05:49 PM

Another Troy moment (this guy is a goldmine):

http://biblocality.com/forums/showthread.php?t=72&page=4

Plus its [The RCC's] liberalness has gotten so bad, that it does nothing to the thousands of pedophiles
Please read http://www.catholic.com/library/A_Crisis_of_Saints.asp (http://www.catholic.com/library/A_Crisis_of_Saints.asp)

God bless

Maiden

I reccomend you follow that link and read that article. Now check out the edited quoted section in Troy's reply to Maiden:

Please read [the RCC site link was removed, which was trying rationalize pedophilia and other false teachings, from the words of a false priest, because he was RC]

Note this piece did nothing to address the fact that RCC does nothing to its priests who can only be male in their pedophilia, nor does this article show repentance from the Mary idolatry, abuse towards women in the Work, paying for indulgences, historicalism, non-OSAS and other such sins.

Cynic Sage

February 11th 2006, 01:53 AM

Another "miracle" of Michael Cadry (from January, but still pretty funny):

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1354996&postcount=674

Dear All,

I have been praying to God that He beat the all-time record of Phoenix having no rain. Looks like it's gonna be this Saturday. I hope that is enough for you all, but I know for some, probably not. You are a very hard bunch of people, like nothing will penetrate your hearts. I don't know what else to do. It says that these two witnesses have power that it rain not in the days of their prophecy, but it doesn't say that these two also have power that it rain to boot. You are misunderstanding the Scriptures. Do you think that God will not send rain for 3 and 1/2 years?? That is not the correct translation of the Scriptures and you are believing in vain.

A bright star in the southeast (planet venus), and a dry spell in Pheonix, Arizona, Wow! After he performs his third sign of turning beer into urine, the Dark Lord Uri Geller will be overthrown and God's kingdom can finally come in power, where the lamb will lay down with the other lamb.:ahem:

Darth Executor

February 12th 2006, 01:02 AM

http://www.yourgoingtohell.com/

'nuff said.

Also http://ruskosplanet.blogspot.com/

Its owner is currently spamming the rec room with "humanist" (fundy atheist) jibberish.

Christy

February 12th 2006, 03:40 AM

I saw that devil face that was in the corner of that "you're going to hell," site on something else, but I can't quite remember what it was. :huh:

jpholding

February 12th 2006, 08:15 AM

Email too good to keep...emphasis added --

Sir James! I'm Gary DeVaney thegodmurders.com website.

I read your blurb on C. Dennis McKinsey's Biblical Errancy. I can see a dozen reasons why YOU wouldn't buy Dennis' books at any price. It is not his excellent scholarship you take issue with. It's Dennis himself. Dennis is not the topic of his scholarship. I started my Biblical investigation in 1982 and had transcribed my findings before I became aware of Dennis' monthly newsletters in the early 90s. I ordered and paid for his $53 BE book 6 months before it was released. I did the same with his second book that sold for over $100. Not much got past me = I thought. But - Both of Dennis' books showed me how much did NOT jump off the Bible pages as I thought I hast captured most of it.

Since 1995, I have been on Dennis' BE panel and we answer all who inquire. Most believers get nothing of content from his C&V issues. They just want to demonize Dennis instead of verifying the C&Vs.

Your comments head off believers who care to normally inquire. Why not let them think for themselves?

I guess BE doesn't head off anyone who wants to inquire from the Bible directly. :lolo:

Excellent scholarship in EBE = Brainwashed Award. :lol:

jpholding

February 13th 2006, 12:37 PM

http://www.stjamesucclimerick.org/

An apologetics list I am on made note of this bunch. I think there may be a party supply store next door. :eww:

Top 10 Reasons to check out the United Church of Christ

10. What if church is like spinach...?
You know, like something that you hated as a kid but you love as an adult because you eat it in ways that suit you much better. Guess what? A lot of people are having the same sort of experience with church . . . In the UCC, things are often quite different and worth checking out.

9. Variety...
UCC churches tend to tailor themselves to fit the people they feel called to serve in their local community. The result: A wide variety of musical traditions, expressions and values that have integrity and purpose. From conservative to liberal, we’re not short on variety.

8. No apologies...
You are what you are...and so are we – we like ourselves just fine. Find a church where you will fit in, be nurtured and challenged to grow.

7. No waiting...
You don’t have to join to be active in many UCC churches. If you want to get involved, many of our churches will find a place to help fulfill your need to give – whether or not you decide to join.

6. No boxes
God can blow the lid off any box, unfold it and turn it into a dance floor. We tend to be the “out of the box” people. Among our many firsts, we were the first mainline church to take a stand against slavery (1700), the first to ordain an African American person (1785), the first to ordain a woman (1853), the first in foreign missions (1810), and the first to ordain openly gay lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered persons (1972). We value education for all people. We founded Harvard and Yale, as well as many historically black colleges, six of which remain affiliated with the UCC to this day.

5. One God, One Faith, One Baptism for All
When we baptize you into our community, we promise that we will never take it back – no matter what you discover about yourself or what others discover about you along life’s journey. We believe that baptism places each of us into the “body of Christ” and lasts forever. Some are baptized as infants, others as adults. Some are sprinkled. Others are immersed. Some reclaim their baptism from a previous church life. For each of us, however, baptism is big enough, strong enough and cleansing enough to last forever. We believe that everyone – old, young, straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, physically or emotionally challenged, rich or poor, sure or unsure, lost or found, Democrat or Republican has a place in the body of Christ. Baptism is like a badge that says, “you’re a full member of the church and no one can take that away from you.”

4. Good News People
We believe that No. 5 is good news!

3. “Party” Church
God is having a party and we are all invited. At God’s party our spiritual hungering is fed and our thirsting is satisfied. At God’s party we get strength, stamina and community support that helps us through the tough times that come to everyone. Feeding our spiritual hunger helps reduce those, “I can’t believe I’m so stupid” moments – but we’ll never eliminate them all. That’s why we need friends and companions and not judges (no offense to judges) for the journey.

2. Spiritual Guidance...
It’s not about commandments. It’s about relationships – even with God. The most important relationship is our relationship with God. Second most important is our relationships with the rest of the human family. In balance, these relationships produce justice amid injustice, kindness in the face of meanness, and the humility of self acceptance that comes as we sense the presence of a God who knows our inmost thoughts and loves us uncontrollably – just as we are. Spiritual journeys can be like the exercise equipment we buy and leave under the bed. Without coaches and workout partners, most of us don’t stick with it. We’re the “Journeys Wanted” people . . . bring yours.

1. We’re waiting for you.

For a bit I thought it was a Landover Baptist type parody, but I guess not. :glare:

JSDileo

February 13th 2006, 12:42 PM

Cynic Sage

February 13th 2006, 12:51 PM

http://www.stjamesucclimerick.org/

An apologetics list I am on made note of this bunch. I think there may be a party supply store next door. :eww:

For a bit I thought it was a Landover Baptist type parody, but I guess not. :glare:

I made this sign at churchsigngenerator.com a while ago. I'm sur prised how well it fits the church you just described:

[attachment]

jpholding

February 13th 2006, 01:09 PM

Oooooh....I have a new toy....

Darth Executor

February 13th 2006, 01:15 PM

This one was good.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=71439

JSDileo

February 13th 2006, 06:33 PM

Hey JP, I just got your e-mail. The girl in that video wasn't that pretty.:hehe::lol:

For those of you who don't know, he sent me a "Monk-E-Mail".:yes:

One Bad Pig

February 14th 2006, 02:50 AM

Came across this on a Google search:

This is not a pleasant story. Billy Graham has been built up to be the most respected popular person in America, Who wants to find out they have been deceived? We will try to give you the facts, or evidence, and may God grant you wisdom as you read this. This section is not propaganda for our own personal views. Years ago, when Fritz set out on his search, he had no final outcome in mind. Fritz isn’t concerned with concealing facts one way or the other. There is no desire to stampede our readers any where. We do want to clarify many issues. We do want to help the truth seeker. But the co-authors personally have no battle to win, except that truth be brought forth.

The issues at stake are not trivial. Historically, Billy Graham’s deception is one of the ,,greatest" deceptions that has ever been perpetrated. Some might argue the greatest, making Benedict Arnold, Quisling, and the Trojan Horse pale into insignificance. Allow us to introduce you just briefly into the world of the Illuminati, All top hierarchy Satanists are required to have covers, The Illuminatus will have multiple personalities, and he or she will have one personality that is particularly shown to the outside world. They (the Programmers, handlers and the Illuminati councils) try to get the best covers that they can. They like to be clergymen, but they are also mayors of big cities, lawyers, doctors, etc. A Christian psychiatrist who has worked with numerous victims of Satanism and Multiple Personality Disorder wrote this observation after having worked with a large number of ex-multi-generational programmed Satanic multiples, "Some Satanists have invaded the church as it is the perfect cover for them. They masquerade as angels of light and gravitate towards positions of leadership in order to have more influence. Because much of what they say is sound doctrinally, they are rarely detected. Most survivors whom I have worked with had satanist parents who were in high positions in churches; many were pastors." (Dr. Fox, Loreda. The Spiritual and Clinical Dimensions of Multiple Personality Disorder. Salida, CO: Books of Sangre de Cristo, p. 196.)

Let us repeat what Dr. Loreda Fox said, "Most survivors whom I have worked with had satanist parents who were in high positions in churches; many were pastors." She didn’t say "some," she said MOST. Independently, we have discovered the very same thing. People don’t grasp that just because a preacher can sincerely preach what seems a "perfect sermon," doesn’t mean that he can’t also be part of the Satanic hierarchy. What is happening with the Illuminati’s ability to create programmed multiples is that we are getting perfect preachers who are secret hierarchy members. Some of their "perfect sermons" are full of slides, such as "the Christian people need to get involved in the voting process. Christians love to hear such things, it tickles their ears, but the truth is that the entire voting process has been captured and corrupted. Voting machines have repeatedly been exposed to have been rigged, and the controlled media and public denial have prevented Americans from giving up their myth that the common man’s votes run this nation. VoteScam - So Easy As To Be Laughable

(The subject of election corruption is dealt with in Fritz’s newsletters, etc.) In Fritz’s Be Wise As Serpents book (which exposed Billy Graham as a Luciferian in 1991), it is explained that high level Satanism is Gnosticism which requires that "the Force" of these great satanic magicians be balanced. In other words, in high level Satanism your good deeds must balance your evil deeds. People do not realize that unless someone does "good" deeds they cannot be a high level Satanist.
Source (http://thechristianbbs.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=print_topic;f=2;t=002155)

:twitch::twitch::twitch:

Apparently, Xavier's in good company. :duh:

jpholding

February 14th 2006, 07:29 AM

Email too good to keep -- it's another one of those thorough rebuttals:

I can change the word home into the word barn in just a few moves, by simply changing one single letter at a time. Each time I change a letter, it will form another whole real word. You've heard of these little brain teasers, haven't you? I think most adults have. Well, that's what you, and most christians are doing, when you are slowly twisting the words of the bible to make it mean something other than what it so plainly reads. And the really sad part is, that most of you actually believe you are doing the right thing. Pathetic. I feel sorry that you are still so disallusioned.

Nice spelling error at the end. Somehow they always come with one.

Hey Jon -- she's pretty by some of Hearthstone's standards, anyway. :lol:

Spheniscine

February 14th 2006, 09:11 AM

Argument from "Change A Letter Game". :lmbo:

LilPunkishOfTerror

February 14th 2006, 06:14 PM

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1386389&postcount=19
NonTrinitarian said:

Besides, if the lowest of the lowest of angels was spoken of in Ps 110, and this angel was going to be given the throne of David, and God transferred the life of this lowly angel to Mary, that same prophecy could be said of that angel. He was David's son because he came from his lineage and he was David's lord because God put him their. Kind of like in verse 1 where the LORD is telling the Lord what to do and that the LORD will tell this Lord when he can go out and rule. (see the first three verses) It's pretty clear which "lord" has more authority. Nope, nothing in there about a two headed Jesus.

Classic! :lmbo:

Cynic Sage

February 14th 2006, 06:29 PM

Hey JP, I just got your e-mail. The girl in that video wasn't that pretty.:hehe::lol:

For those of you who don't know, he sent me a "Monk-E-Mail".:yes:

"Monk-E-Mail"? :huh:

jpholding

February 15th 2006, 07:44 AM

"Monk-E-Mail"? :huh:

You can send an e-card of a chimp speaking any message you want.

jpholding

February 15th 2006, 04:57 PM

Website award for losingmyreligion.com

Check this incorrigible stupidity:

http://www.losingmyreligion.com/essays/brad/pagangods.htm

Christian writes: Firstly, even the experts will acknowledge that there is virtually no literary evidence as to the beliefs of Mirthraism (please refer to "The Origins of the Mithraic Mysteries" by David Ulansey).]

The experts? Experts are a dime a dozen. The experts at the Christian Institute for Creation Research declare that the earth is only about 6,000 years old. For every Christian "expert" on pagan religions, I can cite one who isn't a Christian and establishes that Mithra was a savior God who was worshipped prior to Jesus and whose origins date long before Jesus was supposed to have been born.

*****

This Christian can sing and dance and quote any number of books he wants.
Here's what the Encarta online research source says about Mithra:

*******

Also, from a web site which examines Mithraism:

(end quotes, ref Dr M. D. Magee AskWhy! Publications Website, www.askwhy.co.uk/christianity/0690Mithras.html)

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 02:07 AM

Website award for losingmyreligion.com

Check this incorrigible stupidity:

http://www.losingmyreligion.com/essays/brad/pagangods.htm

I was Checking out their FAQ page, and look what I found:

http://www.losingmyreligion.com/faq.htm#youarequoting

You are quoting Bible verses out of context. If you understood the times and the history surrounding the circumstances, you'd see it very differently.
True. We are not Bible scholars, and do not pretend to understand the historical, cultural and linguistic background behind ancient texts. In addition, we are looking at ancient documents through multiple filters spanning time, culture, language, and our own biases, so hold no illusions that we (or the opposition) understand the Bible as it was originally penned.

All this being said, we'd like to point out one thing: most evangelical Christians are in the same boat. They are not qualified Biblical scholars, nor are their clergy. They hurl their diatribes at society from a similar platform of Biblical misinformation. Our job, therefore, is to take their claims at face value, and judge them on their moral and ethical merits, rather than their Biblical accuracy. It is Christian beliefs and doctrines we take issue with, regardless of how Biblical or unBiblical they may be.

Why don't you try to understand the Bible more accurately then, instead of propagating the misinformation you accuse evangelical Christians of spreading?
Though we respect the field of Bible history, it is of limited usefulness to the average person, because the understanding of ancient texts requires a level of training and academic facility beyond most people. But more importantly, untrained Christian practitioners abound. And the most vocal of these-- the ones through which our society at large encounters Christianity--are the evangelical types whose work you see dominating the media, college campuses and car bumpers. They include the world's largest Protestant denomination, and America's most influential Christian political organizations. These people, unfortunately, are the de facto interpreters of scripture. Their narrow, literalist view of the Bible, and the weird morality it creates, are what most of us understand Christianity to be. These Christians take their English-translated Bibles at face value, and draw moral and ethical conclusions straight from what they selectively read.

In this arena, we are as qualified as they. We too can examine scripture on such a level, and weigh the resulting moral and ethical implications. Our fight, therefore, is against conservative, fundamentalist Christianity, which concerns itself more with faith and dogma, than ethics and reason, or academic accuracy.

"Fighting Fundy-Xtian Ignorance regardign the Bible with Fundy-Athiest Ignorance regarding the Bible, because truth and accuracy doesn't matter as much as PWNing xtians."

:rofl:

Sparko

February 16th 2006, 12:01 PM

Tladatsi thinks that even though the bible condemns homosexuality, it doesn't mean that God forbids Gay Marriage because it doesn't specifically ban such.

Homosexuality, sex between men, is an abomination. Just read Lev 18:22 "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it [is] abomination.". Lest there be any misunderstanding this ban on sex between men is repeated in Lev 20:13 is says "If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood [shall be] upon them." The Bible says twice that two men have sex as a man and a woman do is an abomination.
It is also an abomination if a divorced couple to have sex (Deu 24:4). Further, it is an abomination for a woman to wear pants (Deu 22:5). It also says that that eating any sea other than fish is an abomination. Eating lobster, crabs, crawdads, clams, mussels, scallops, shrimp, and prawns is also an abomination (Lev 11:10). It actually says that four (Lev 11:10, 11:11, and 11:12) times, twice as much as homosexual sex.

However what it does not says is that two cannot love each other or be married.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=71393&page=1&pp=16

The rest of his posts in the thread are just as ridiculous.

JSDileo

February 16th 2006, 01:04 PM

I nominate this guy:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0335345/board/thread/36266388

We think of Islamic martyrs as insane and brainwashed for killing themselves for some religious belief. But, wasn't, dare I point out... Jesus Christ a martyr who died for his religious belief? Isn't the main point of The Passion of the Christ about how great Jesus was for being persecuted by the Roman Empire (much like America in today's world) for his beliefs and dying for them? Wow, this is kind of weird to think about. But Jesus WAS a martyr. What's the difference between him and the nuts to kill themselves (or allow themselves to be killed) for their religious beliefs? At least William Wallace allowed himself to die for something real. Jesus just died for some theological belief, just like any other martyr. He's not "the greatest person that ever lived". He's just a martyr! No greater than any other brainwashed nut in today's world who feels persecuted by the dominant empire and dies for his religious beliefs.

PS I don't mean to offend anyone, I'm just pointing out something.

Yeah, because Jesus dying on the cross to save the world is the same as blowing yourself up and killing a crowd of people.:twitch::lmbo:

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 02:19 PM

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 02:38 PM

Provoker, again:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1387671&postcount=54

...
When Judaism was new(in 6th century BC Babylon), and it's goal was clear, it was converting people to messianic, nationalistic, Judaism, and it was using the rite of baptism to seal one's committment to the movement. Baptism respresented the death of Israel, the burying of the covenant, and the coming resurrection of covenant Israel, which would set God's covenant plan, to bless all the peoples/nations of the world, back into motion.
The death, burial, and resurrection, of Lazarus, and Jesus, may have been elaborate enactments of the baptism ritual, and that is also suggested by the gospel statement that Jesus' crucifixion took place in a garden which coincidently contained the tomb of Joseph of Arimethea, further suggesting that the crucifixion took place in Joseph's own garden.
It has been suggested by many bible scholars, that there was a close family connection between Joseph of Arimethea, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus of Bethany, and that the tomb which Lazarus was raised from, may be the very tomb that Jesus was raised from, at Bethany, just outside the walls of Jerusalem.
The stories that Jesus appeared after being raised from the dead, along with the many stories of his much later death in India, Rome, England, etc, and accounts in the gnostic gospels, suggest that maybe Jesus did not actually die at the "crucifixion".
There is one other point; The only sign that people will receive, but will not understand, is "the sign of Jonah", which is interesting in that Jonah, for all intents and purposes, appeared to die, but in actual fact he remained alive for the three days he was in the whale's belly, before he was resurrected on the beach at Nineva. Is the meaning of this interesting sign that people will refuse to understand, that Jesus was alive inside the tomb, and did not die on the cross?

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1389637&postcount=68

Hello Sparko:
Thanks for the response:-)
I see your point, and raise you one point...LOL
If "the crucifixion" took place in Joseph of Arimethea's own garden, as one of the gospels states, then the crucifixion and resurrection was probably a staged representation of the death of the covenant kingdom of Israel, the burial of the everlasting(old) covenant, and the good news of the coming resurrection of the covenant kingdom of Israel from the dead, in which case all the problems you suggest, would simply have been part of the act.
What do you think?

Which is stupider? The notion that the Apostles gave their lives for what they knew to be a lie, or that they gave their lives for what they knew to be a play?

Sparko

February 16th 2006, 02:45 PM

Provoker, again:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1387671&postcount=54

his next post gets even worse:

Hello Sparko:
Thanks for the response:-)
I see your point, and raise you one point...LOL
If "the crucifixion" took place in Joseph of Arimethea's own garden, as one of the gospels states, then the crucifixion and resurrection was probably a staged representation of the death of the covenant kingdom of Israel, the burial of the everlasting(old) covenant, and the good news of the coming resurrection of the covenant kingdom of Israel from the dead, in which case all the problems you suggest, would simply have been part of the act.
What do you think?

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1389637&postcount=68

Reminds me of the wacky stuff Johnny Skeptic kept coming up with. Joseph being hopped up on drugs and whatnot.

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 05:31 PM

Crusader, in a humor thread about the Dick Cheyney hunting accident, on how political satire is Un-Christian:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=71550&page=4&pp=16

Proverbs 9:7-12

Of course the irony is that ven though you read the verse you still had to post it as a rebuke.

Of course, quoting scripture out of context is simply a form of eisogesis so I'm not sure where this leaves us. But as long as we're doing it, how about this one in regards to your devotion to a particular political party: Matthew 6:24.

Not out of context at all. If the shoe fits, wear it.

All you guys can do is stand around and gloat about this unfortunate incident - what kind of Christians are you? Remember, it was the mockers and gloaters who stood beneath the cross. Nice company you're in. Oh, yes, there were women followers of the Lord there as well - all the men had fled away.

Making a joke about a current event involving the VP = Mocking Jesus on the cross as he dies for your sins. Wow. :ahem:

So, in your analogy, Dick Cheney is equated with Christ? Thats a little....blasphemous doncha think? Are you really listening to what you are saying? The level to which you have raised VP Cheney and the Republican party is pretty much idolatrous.

No, I equate gloating over a man's misfortune with those who gloated over Christ's misfortune. I think that the fact that the thread is titled "Post your Cheney/Republican shooting jokes here," speaks volumes. It should just be titled, "Post your Republican jokes here." It's pretty obvious where you're coming from. Hey, I have an idea. Let's make jokes about all the aborted babies in America in the past year - we'll call it, "Post your abortion/Democrat jokes here."

Making jokes about an non-lethal hunting accident = Making jokes about millions of killed unborn children. Wow again.:ahem:

Sparko

February 16th 2006, 05:36 PM

Provoker, again:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1387671&postcount=54

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1389637&postcount=68

Which is stupider? The notion that the Apostles gave their lives for what they knew to be a lie, or that they gave their lives for what they knew to be a play?

Good point. you should post that in the thread.

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 05:44 PM

Steve F, on what love is (from a thread discussing Brokeback Mountain):

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1389336&postcount=18

BV defined love by commitment (and presumably some other things); I argued that the two protagonists do show commitment to each other (what they demonstrate towards their wives is irrelevant) and therefore by his criteria they are in love.

Man, what is it with "adultery is romantic" movies today anyway?

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 05:51 PM

Rayado (who is not a screwball) sent me this:

Website found here (http://rwor.org/a/1239/ba_religion.htm), written by Bob Avakian, Chairman of the Communist Revolution Party.

An excerpt I like to call "Jesus the slave-driver:"

For example, to illustrate the relationship between god and people on earth, Jesus will use a parable about masters and slaves. Now obviously he's not saying that relation is bad, because he's using it to illustrate the relation between god and human beings. He's accepting this relation of masters and slaves among human beings as a given. He's certainly not saying it should be struggled against and overturned. So the best that can be said for Jesus and his teachings, and for the early Christians, insofar as they followed those teachings, is that they would leave the oppressive and exploitative relations among people intact, and within those confines they would attempt to give some relief to the poor and oppressed. They would not attempt to put forward a basis and a way to overthrow and uproot such relations.

:doh:

The only source cited as a footnote: Asimov's Guide to the Bible. :haha:

Rayado

February 16th 2006, 11:32 PM

Thank you very very much for that qualification. :teeth:

That whole linked article is a goldmine for screwball awards, too.

Cynic Sage

February 16th 2006, 11:39 PM

Dude, you could have posted it here yourself.

Cynic Sage

February 17th 2006, 03:33 PM

David Ben-Ariel defends Herbert W. Armstrong:

http://ezinearticles.com/?Herbert-W.-Armstrong-Was-Ahead-of-His-Time!&id=110620

I'm often accosted by some who mindlessly cut and paste a list of Herbert W. Armstrong's "failed prophecies." I respond Herbert Armstrong was ahead of his time and served as an early warning system. What follows is one of these many exchanges:

...is it really enough to dismiss this written record as "being ahead of his time?"

Yes. Why don't you just be honest and admit you hate Herbert W. Armstrong because he spoke the plain truth that CANNOT be refuted? that your traditional Churchianity is merely baptized paganism the Bible condemns as part of Mystery Babylon? For exposing your SUNday as a pagan counterfeit of the biblical Sabbath; your pagan holidays you've sought with your replacement theology to replace the biblical festivals; that sheeple like you bleat they're born again and don't have a clue what they're talking about, since we're born again at the Resurrection only; that God is not the sadist traditional Christians make Him out to be; that the meek inherit the Earth - not float off to Heaven; that you're not an immortal soul, eternal life is a gift from God; the wicked will be destroyed, ashes under our feet; we can become literal God-beings, members of the Kingdom-Family of God? Why don't you just confess and forsake your sins of murderous hatred against HWA for slaughtering your "sacred cow" and exposing it as religious bull from Babylon?

Haven't I refuted Herbert Armstrong by showing his timing was off?

No. The Apostle Paul also thought Christ would return in his lifetime. He was ahead of his time, as he, like Herbert W. Armstrong, later realized.

Somebody needs to be whacked with a preterism stick. From what I take of it, this guy is the Hal Lindsey of Historicism :hehe:
The enemies of God and Herbert W. Armstrong can't refute the plain truth of the Bible that anybody can read and see for themselves. That's why they have such a murderous hatred against Christ in him, just like the "religious" violently opposed Jesus for standing up for the TRUTH over their tradition.

May such misguided folks repent of their mob mentality against God's servants, and learn to go against popular error instead and start teaching the plain truth of the Bible (that contradicts their present idolatrous traditions). Otherwise they'll die in their sins and traditional darkness (John 15:22).

David's right you know. When I read his work, I get so filled with murderous rage that I... I...

Hrrrrnn!

WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!?

RRRGH!

GRAAARGH!

HGRAAAAAAAAAAAAAALGH!!!!

[attachment]

...

...are you denying he said the things I posted?

I said Mr. Armstrong was ahead of his time. The PRINCIPLES of prophecy he spoke of remain absolutely true: a final revival of the unholy Roman Empire is prophesied and the EU is forging ahead with that Frankenstein Monster now.

I'm stating categorically that what you've thrown up against Mr. Armstrong is a DIVERSIONARY TACTIC, a dishonest attempt to discredit him, since you can't refute the black and white of the Bible he taught on the plain points I've made and you know it. Who do you think you're fooling by such pretense? God? Man? Why play your foolish games?

Dude could you just picture an OT prophet using the "I'm just ahead of my time" excuse to avoid being stoned to death. :lol:

Here's a link to a thread discussing his article here on Tweb:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=67039

Darth Executor

February 17th 2006, 06:15 PM

LakeGeorgeMan:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1391640#post1391640

The word “god” as used by FS in the OP of this thread is clearly biased. He is using it to refer to the Westernized, Christianized concept of a monotheistic, creator of the universe, omnimax, personal deity. That’s what he means when he says the word god. That’s how he’s been programmed. Christians like to use the word god as a brand name. The word “god” means something entirely different to a pantheist or ancient Greek polytheist.

:lolo:

Cynic Sage

February 17th 2006, 06:34 PM

LakeGeorgeMan:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1391640#post1391640

:lolo:

I don't get it? How is that a screwbish?

Darth Executor

February 17th 2006, 06:57 PM

I don't get it? How is that a screwbish?

"The word “car” as used by FS in the OP of this thread is clearly biased. He is using it to refer to the american concept of a red four wheel vehicle."

Basically, he's whining about FS's use of the word "god" because it doesn't include every single god in existance, much like in the above example, a red four wheel vehicle does not include every car in existance.

Darth Executor

February 17th 2006, 07:24 PM

LGM must be running for the gold.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=71512&page=7

If Christ was an immortal god, then by definition, he could not die. Thus he never really rose from the dead, because he never really could be dead. Thus the whole concept is incoherent.

If Christ was an immortal god-man that really lived on this planet and somehow really could "die" and then really "rose from the dead", in a physical body, then where is he? Why isn't he still here? If he "left", how did he leave? Why would he leave? Where did he go? How did he get there?

The simple answer is it is a made up story.

If you take time to develop your own argument for me about why I should not believe in the resurrection of Osiris or the Heaven Gate's cult members who comitted suicide, then you will have your answer.

JSDileo

February 17th 2006, 07:26 PM

LGM must be running for the gold.

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=71512&page=7

Maybe someone should introduce the concept of spiritual immortality to him.:ahem:

jpholding

February 18th 2006, 10:19 AM

Email too good to keep from Gary DeVaney, one of McKinsey's worshippers. I told him his whole site, the godmurders.com, was old news; then he pulled out some oddity by a guy named Arnold Murray (??) that Satan and Adam had a homosexual encounter in the Garden, and I noted that that sounded particularly stupid. His reply:

You quip that my material is old and tired yet when an issue is pointed out that Pastor Arnold Murray, who is on over 400 TV stations, you call it stupid. Your consistent hypocrisy is monument!!!

:lolo:

Darth Executor

February 18th 2006, 10:29 AM

JSDileo

February 18th 2006, 11:17 AM

Email too good to keep from Gary DeVaney, one of McKinsey's worshippers. I told him his whole site, the godmurders.com, was old news; then he pulled out some oddity by a guy named Arnold Murray (??) that Satan and Adam had a homosexual encounter in the Garden, and I noted that that sounded particularly stupid. His reply:

:twitch:

Where in the world did he get that from?:huh:

Darth Executor

February 18th 2006, 01:10 PM

http://www.bju.edu/prospective/expect/rhall.html

That list is hilarious.

New Age, jazz, rock, and country music is not permitted.
Contemporary Christian music is not permitted (e.g., Michael W. Smith, Stephen Curtis Chapman, WOW Worship, and so forth).

All weapons must be turned in for storage. Trigger locks are required for pistols. Fireworks are not permitted on campus.

:rofl:

lfellows

February 18th 2006, 02:09 PM

One Bad Pig

February 18th 2006, 03:36 PM

Email too good to keep from Gary DeVaney, one of McKinsey's worshippers. I told him his whole site, the godmurders.com, was old news; then he pulled out some oddity by a guy named Arnold Murray (??) that Satan and Adam had a homosexual encounter in the Garden, and I noted that that sounded particularly stupid. His reply:

:lolo:
There was a guy on Paltalk a couple weeks ago peddling the notion that the Serpent had sex with Adam and Eve. He was a disciple of Arnold Murray. :duh:

Cynic Sage

February 18th 2006, 06:49 PM

Why do you consider this screwball material?

You can't listen to rock or country music even if it is by Christians, yet weapons (which can actually be used to kill people) are somehow allowed on campus (although they are to be kept in storage).

:lmbo:

Man, and I thought Capenwray (where my sis is curretnly attending) had weird rules.

Darth Executor

February 18th 2006, 06:56 PM

foahchon

February 19th 2006, 01:41 AM

Apparently Richard Carrier, as a philosopher, thinks himself equal to Aristotle and Hume. In response to Wood's review of his book (http://www.columbia.edu/%7Ercc20/contrawood.html#philosopher):

At the very least, Wood cannot argue against the fact that I am no less a philosopher than Aristotle or Hume. My knowledge, education, and qualifications certainly match theirs in every relevant respect.

:lolo:

Also, as a sidenote, I chanced upon one of Rameus' speaking engagements, appearing on an atheist internet radio show called "Hellbound Alleee (http://www.hellboundalleee.com/archives.html)," (it's show #84) where he styles himself an expert on Ancient Near Eastern history. In this particular engagement he claims that the data we have from ancient times is too fragmentary or insufficient to do any reconstructing (concerning the Gospels), and then proceeds to do a reconstruction himself. :doh:I have to wonder if it's this sort of thing that keeps him from his debate with Holding.

Cynic Sage

February 19th 2006, 06:28 PM

PitchforkPat, on God "orchestrating rape":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1391983&postcount=49

Agreed. Now on to God allowing (I’ll contend even orchestrating rape):

...

2 Sam. 12: “11Thus says the LORD, 'Behold, I will raise up evil against you out of your own house. And I will take your wives before your eyes and give them to your neighbor, and he shall lie with your wives in the sight of this sun. 12For you did it secretly, but I will do this thing before all Israel and before the sun.'"

Notice how God says “I will raise up evil against you”. Pretty clear he’s doing it. He will raise up evil from David’s own house (or family). And this “neighbour” will have sex with David’s wives in “the sight of this sun” (or in public).

Now it turns out that the “neighbour” is actually David’s son, Absalom who has sex with David’s wives after marching on the palace to take over David’s thrown. Having sex with 10 of David’s wives was to show that they could never be reconciled. Now, these women had no say in this, so this in itself is rape that God has orchestrated. Unless, of course, it just so happened by massive coincidence that all 10 of the women were dying to have sex with Absalom cause he was so cute.

That’s not the only rape that God orchestrates in this Bible story though. The whole “evil” that was raised out of David’s house by God, and the reason for Absalom and David’s feud was because Absalom had David’s son Amnon killed, and had run into exile to avoid his father’s wrath. Why had Absalom had David’s son Amnon killed? Because the whole affair had been triggered by Amnon raping his sister (well half sister) Tamar.

Nothing would have happened without the rape. It took this horrible incident for Absalom to get mad enough to kill his own brother, then fear for his life and go into exile. So this poor innocent girl goes to help her brother who is pretending to be ill and give him some food. He forcibly rapes her then decides right afterwards that he hates her (no surprise since the idea of raping his own sister was God’s doing). Her life is in complete ruins and she goes crying to her brother Absalom and the family rift is in full swing.

How much you wanna bet Pat was a Calvinist before he apostasized?

See him get owned by Jaltus here (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1393504&postcount=52).

Cynic Sage

February 19th 2006, 07:23 PM

Bagger Vance has an interesting definition of the word "suicide":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1389482#post1389482

It is funny how suicide is stigmatized in some situations but not in others. When Jesus killed himself we were all supposedly saved...and yes he did kill himself because he said that he laid his life down for us. That is a suicide. The christians that allowed themselves to be fed to lions were suicidal. If they can submit to nature and die why can't someone kill themselves in the face of cancer?

Rayado

February 19th 2006, 08:43 PM

Communists prove their adroit (:hehe:) handling of the Bible:

From the website rwor.org: (http://rwor.org/godoriginalfascist/)

http://rwor.org/a/series/godoriginalfascist-children.jpg
"This engraving of a bible scene depicts the killing of children. The Bible is filled with dozens of similar scenes of slaughter, cruelty, and rape, approvingly written about provided that they are carried out on “orders from God.”"

What's comical about it is that the scene they depict is obviously the slaughter of the innocents. This may actually be the first time in history that it has been suggested that Herod's slaughter was 'on orders from God.' :ahem:

Cynic Sage

February 20th 2006, 06:24 PM

A nomination for Pastor Doyle Davidson:

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/metropolitan/3663101.html

The pastor of a charismatic Christian church attended by the Plano mother on trial, accused of fatally cutting off the arms of her 10-month-old daughter, told jurors Wednesday that mental illness is really demon possession that cannot be cured with psychiatry or medicine.

"I do not believe that any mental illness exists other than demons, and no medication can straighten it out, other than the power of God," said Doyle Davidson, the 73-year-old minister of the Water of Life Church that Dena and John Schlosser attended several times a week.

...

Davidson also testified that he has cast demons out of parishioners and seen evil spirits, including one that was 6 feet tall with a long tail. The former veterinarian, who has no formal religious training, has a cable TV show in the Dallas area and several states.

...

A police report states the pastor was in the home of another married member of his congregation, sitting on top of her and trying to choke out evil spirits.

Davidson told jurors that God had pledged the woman to him and that demons were keeping them apart, but he denied he was drunk or was trying to choke her.

:rant: It makes me want to vomit when I think about how people like this can make it to a leadership position in the Church.

Cynic Sage

February 20th 2006, 06:59 PM

Site Nomination:

http://www.geocities.com/b_r_a_d_99/index.html

:ahem: OY! Check out a load of this guy's Crap:

http://www.geocities.com/b_r_a_d_99/moralgene.htm

Many Christians promote the theological position that any action God takes is always perfectly good and moral.
To support this speculation, which they often advertise to the world as a universal fact, Christians implant a type of "moral" genetic code inside their God.
This form of Christian reasoning rejects the idea that moral standards are an arbitrary function of God's power.
They also reject the idea that there is a Law higher or outside of God.

"Moral genetic code inside God" :huh:
And I don't know what problem he has with the fact that we don't believe there is a "Law higher than God", considering how humanists don't believe in a law higher than man.

Cynic Sage

February 20th 2006, 07:39 PM

Another site nomination for ChristianityMeme.org (http://www.christianitymeme.org/).

A sample of it's crap here:

http://www.christianitymeme.org/stand.shtml

Abortion and Birth Control

The Christianity Meme is against abortion. Simply put, an aborted fetus is a missed opportunity to infect a new host. Instead, the Christianity Meme strongly supports intervention and religious indoctrination of mothers who are considering abortion. Such women are often at difficult times in their lives which makes them more susceptible to infection. (Not long ago, women who were pregnant out of wedlock were often sent to convents to bear their children. Without a doubt, religious (re-)indoctrination was also part of the program.) Through the parent-child bond, the Christianity Meme will likely be passed to the child, as well. For the Christianity Meme, this represents the potential infection two hosts for the effort of infecting one.
Christianity claims to be in the business of saving souls (not necessarily saving lives). An aborted fetus represents a soul free from sin that will automatically go to heaven. The soul of an aborted fetus is already saved. (In fact, this may be the most efficient means of getting souls into heaven.) The Christian outcry over abortion is at odds with the stated objective of saving souls. Some Christians have even gone so far as to encourage violence toward abortion doctors. The infamous "baby butchers" web site is no longer up, but this site (http://courses.cs.vt.edu/%7Ecs3604/lib/Freedom.of.Speech/BB.front.html) describes the controversy. The loud Christian outcry over abortion is much better explained by the Christianity Meme, that is missing out on a lifetime of influence over the unborn child. The objective of the Christianity Meme is aided by those people who are also sympathetic to the loss of a living (pre-)human.

The message of the Christianity Meme is for Christians to "go forth and multiply" and "raise your children in the Christian faith". Birth control of any form is taboo, since it interferes with the propagation of the Christianity Meme. In fact, not long ago, masturbation, oral sex, contraceptives, the rhythm method, and homosexuality were all considered "crimes against nature" as they all interfered with procreation. The Christianity Meme has lost some territory in the arena of control over human sexuality. Isn't it ironic that as another life form, the Christianity Meme has so much control over humans' breeding. Should we really give so much control over our human destiny to an unconscious life form with its own agenda?

The rythm method was considered a "crime against nature"? :rofl:

Wow, and all this time I thought I was pro-life out of compassion for the unborn, turns out it was my mind-virus just wanted me to feed it bebbies.

Uh oh, turns out there's another mind virus (http://www.godlessprolifers.org/) interested in saving bebbies so it can infect them (site not a screwball).

How the heck can anything unconcious have an agenda anyway?

Gun Control

While the Christianity Meme is neutral on the issue of gun control, Republicans, who are often True Christians, oppose gun control legislation. The Christianity Meme apparently benefits from massacres because they often create martyrs, fuel the cry for more religion, and "a return to Christian values". Both were outcomes of the recent Littleton High School shootings. See the news article " For the Right, Littleton's Tragedy became a 'Window of Opportunity' (http://www.christianitymeme.org/news.shtml#fall-1999-littleton)".

"Christianity wants bebbies to be shot". :lolo:

Uh, don't massacres also fuel the cry for stricter gun laws. I mean, when you think about it. Using the same reasoning we can say that the Athiest Meme benefits from massacres (especially those propogated by religious fanatics) because they often create a negative image of religion and fuel the cry "How could a good God let this happen?".

jpholding

February 21st 2006, 07:52 AM

Pitchforkpat for this display of fundy atheism in a thread just started in Apol 301 -- typical but it deserves at least bronze.

It seems that very often when I, or others, raise an objection to a specific passage in the Bible, a very popular answer suggests a mistranslation or that the passage in question doesn’t really mean what it appears to be stating. When you start adding these mistranslations up the Bible begins to appear quite unreliable, so it makes one wonder if it’s the wrong version that’s being used and if there’s any that can be truly relied upon. While I realize that many here do not adhere to a literal translation, I would still like to here some opinions on what Bible constitutes the most reliable translation.

Further, I would like to know if anyone considers any Bible to be in fact accurately translated. If no Bible can be said to be reliably translated, it does make me wonder why, when the Bible states “God is not the author of confusion” that he would not provide us with at least one reliable translation of his word.

:lolo:

Cynic Sage

February 21st 2006, 02:06 PM

A nomination for THE UNDEAD!!!:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=31074&postcount=2

Asking a bunch of theologians about women's headcoverings will almost certainly get you a dissertation on why they should not be applied (culturally specific). However, most discerning people will soon cotton onto the fact that culture does not feature as reason for action or non-action anywhere in the NT.

It is obvious that 1 Cor 11;2-> is nothing to do with culture, or if it is, it is speciific to the culture of the true church (as opposed to the gnostic church that abandoned obedience to the apostles).

JSDileo

February 21st 2006, 02:08 PM

A nomination for THE UNDEAD!!!:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=31074&postcount=2
Hey! How come you don't have a Batman avatar?:glare:

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 02:12 PM

Yeah! What's with that crap avatar theme?

Cynic Sage

February 21st 2006, 02:28 PM

Yeah! What's with that crap avatar theme?

My last Batman avatar contained a Frank Miller-esque word in it that the Tweb mods thought were unapropriate. It was an animated gif based on this comic strip:

http://www.shortpacked.com/d/20051230.html

lfellows

February 21st 2006, 03:09 PM

You can't listen to rock or country music even if it is by Christians, yet weapons (which can actually be used to kill people) are somehow allowed on campus (although they are to be kept in storage).

:lmbo:

Man, and I thought Capenwray (where my sis is curretnly attending) had weird rules.

Huh? What does rules pertaining to music have to do with whether they can keep guns on campus? While guns can certainly be used to kill people, so can rope, shoe strings, pens, pencils, paper, books, glass, etc. You presume a danger in allowing guns on campus without basis in fact and then try to draw a comparison with the school's rules regarding music?

The mere fact that a Christian writes, or performs, music does not make that music Christ-centered or God-honoring. While a blanket ban on rock or country music might eliminate good music from being enjoyed, as a general rule such restrictions are understandable. Much of what passes as contemporary christian music is christian in name only.

My question was how these rules were "screwball". You may not agree with their choices in music, or their reasons, but before you can claim they are screwball, show where they are in any way unscriptural.

lfellows

February 21st 2006, 03:24 PM

Don't forget the "No violent videogames" rule. :lol:

Please show me were the Bible endorses and encourages us to fill our minds with violent thoughts: whether that be through violent video games or violent movies or books? Maybe the better question is: How does playing violent video games lead to a God-honoring and Christ-centered life?

My initial issue was with the claim that BJU's housing rules were somehow screwball material, which I understand from reading JP's "screwball" thread every month is concerned with unscriptural declarations or proclaimations. You may not agree with BJU's rules, but that by itself certainly does not make their rules unscriptural.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 03:27 PM

Please show me were the Bible endorses and encourages us to fill our minds with violent thoughts: whether that be through violent video games or violent movies or books? Maybe the better question is: How does playing violent video games lead to a God-honoring and Christ-centered life?

My initial issue was with the claim that BJU's housing rules were somehow screwball material, which I understand from reading JP's "screwball" thread every month is concerned with unscriptural declarations or proclaimations. You may not agree with BJU's rules, but that by itself certainly does not make their rules unscriptural.

I nominate this guy.

LilPunkishOfTerror

February 21st 2006, 03:39 PM

I nominate Nigerian Christians for burning down mosques and killing Muslims (!) in response to Islamic attacks on churches (and unfortunately, Christians died)

Revenge should be left to Him.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/nigeria_sectarian_violence

lfellows

February 21st 2006, 03:39 PM

I nominate this guy.

I take it then that "screwball" refers to one you do not agree with and not to what the Bible says. I am sorry to have wasted my efforts.

Thank you for your nomination.

One Bad Pig

February 21st 2006, 03:41 PM

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 03:48 PM

I take it then that "screwball" refers to one you do not agree with and not to what the Bible says. I am sorry to have wasted my efforts.

Thank you for your nomination.

Screwball award refers to stupid stuff. Allowing guns in a school (what the heck?) while banning games rated TEEN or higher definitely qualifies as stupid.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 04:07 PM

I suppose it's not a good idea to say you're wrong and not explain why, so let me retry:

Please show me were the Bible endorses and encourages us to fill our minds with violent thoughts: whether that be through violent video games or violent movies or books?

Violent books? Here's an excerpt from one of my favorite violent books:

Deu 13:6 "If your brother, the son of your mother, or your son or your daughter or the wife you embrace or your friend who is as your own soul entices you secretly, saying, 'Let us go and serve other gods,' which neither you nor your fathers have known,
Deu 13:7 some of the gods of the peoples who are around you, whether near you or far off from you, from the one end of the earth to the other,
Deu 13:8 you shall not yield to him or listen to him, nor shall your eye pity him, nor shall you spare him, nor shall you conceal him.
Deu 13:9 But you shall kill him. Your hand shall be first against him to put him to death, and afterward the hand of all the people.
Deu 13:10 You shall stone him to death with stones, because he sought to draw you away from the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.

It seems to me that the whiners who complain about violent movies/books/games either can't tell the difference between reality and fantasy (and assume nobody else can either) or don't realise that mankind in the west is so sheltered from the brutal reality that the rest of the world is exposed to that whacking virtual penguins into a target and getting a highscore in such a game needs to be banned from a school. To top it all off, you are allowed to bring guns there which, unlike video games, serve one purpose and one purpose alone: do harm. If only BJU was consistent, but apparently whacking evil scientists as a dirty bandecoot "fills our minds with violent thoughts" while bringing a shotgun that can redecorate an entire room with an unfortunate sap's brains is perfectly fine as long as you don't sleep and eat with it.

Maybe the better question is: How does playing violent video games lead to a God-honoring and Christ-centered life?

For some it keeps their testosterone in check by allowing them to blast away pixels instead of classmates with a BJU approved handheld mortar. On the other hand, picking my nose, wiping after I take a crap and writing inane drivel on the Internet hardly has anything to do with a God-honoring and Christ-centered life and I'm sure both of us have done all three.

My initial issue was with the claim that BJU's housing rules were somehow screwball material, which I understand from reading JP's "screwball" thread every month is concerned with unscriptural declarations or proclaimations.

No, it is concerned with stupid, religion related declarations or proclamations. By your definition he would give everyone he replies to a screwball award.

You may not agree with BJU's rules, but that by itself certainly does not make their rules unscriptural.

Scriptural or unscriputral isn't the issue, stupidity is. BJU is a fundy factory and their rules are idiotic.

jpholding

February 21st 2006, 04:19 PM

While guns can certainly be used to kill people, so can rope, shoe strings, pens, pencils, paper, books, glass, etc.

Good point. I seem to remember a guy at the prison I worked with who was in for 25 to 50 for killing someone with a shoe string. :ahem: They used to call him "The Knotter".

Much of what passes as contemporary christian music is christian in name only.

I'd seriously consider becoming the Weird Al Yankovic of contemporary Christian music....if only I didn't have such serious problems with congestion.

which I understand from reading JP's "screwball" thread every month is concerned with unscriptural declarations or proclaimations.

Well, no, Darth is right there. It's for stuff that's screwy. "Unscriptural" is a bonus if you can get it (and I guess 60% of all the nominees at least are promoting unscriptural stuff) but it isn't required.

JSDileo

February 21st 2006, 04:25 PM

Good point. I seem to remember a guy at the prison I worked with who was in for 25 to 50 for killing someone with a shoe string. :ahem: They used to call him "The Knotter".

I'd seriously consider becoming the Weird Al Yankovic of contemporary Christian music....if only I didn't have such serious problems with congestion.

Well, no, Darth is right there. It's for stuff that's screwy. "Unscriptural" is a bonus if you can get it (and I guess 60% of all the nominees at least are promoting unscriptural stuff) but it isn't required.

Oh! Casting Crowns is a good band!

I'm not gonna win a screwball for that am I? :noid:

Cynic Sage

February 21st 2006, 04:46 PM

Huh? What does rules pertaining to music have to do with whether they can keep guns on campus? While guns can certainly be used to kill people, so can rope, shoe strings, pens, pencils, paper, books, glass, etc. You presume a danger in allowing guns on campus without basis in fact and then try to draw a comparison with the school's rules regarding music?

How do I explain this?

The purpose of rope is to tie things.

The purpose of Shoe-strings is to keep your shoes on.

The purpose of pens, pencils, and paper is to be used for writing and/or drawing.

The purpose of Music (and other forms of art) is to convey thoughts and emotions.

The purpose of firearms is to convey hot lead.

BTW: I am actually a Pro-gun guy. I believe that the gun laws where I live (Canada) are too restrictive and only hinder law-abiding citizens from obtaining guns rather than criminals and gang-members. But come on! Don't tell me you don't see anything messed up about a campus that bans music that doesn't mention God or Jesus (whoops, there goes "Song of Songs") and games where you have to shoot a terrorist to rescue an innocent hostage, yet allows you to bring an actual firearm on campus. It's like a Christian college having a strict modest-dress policy yet allowing sex-toys on campus.

The mere fact that a Christian writes, or performs, music does not make that music Christ-centered or God-honoring. While a blanket ban on rock or country music might eliminate good music from being enjoyed, as a general rule such restrictions are understandable. Much of what passes as contemporary christian music is christian in name only.

My question was how these rules were "screwball". You may not agree with their choices in music, or their reasons, but before you can claim they are screwball, show where they are in any way unscriptural.

The way I see it is that music can be no more "Christian" than a cake can. Art is simply the droppings of Man's soul, whatever is in him will make it out, whether it be his dedication to God, love for a woman, sadness at the loss of a loved one, anger and hatred at what he believes is wrong in the world ect.

A chef may bake his cake to the Glory of God, another may simply bake because he is hungry, another because it's what the restaurant pays him to do. A chef could write "I LUV YOU JESUS!" on the cake, or even "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE!" or "I'M SORRY I FORGOT OUR ANNIVERSSARY JUNE!" in icing on his cake. Are any cakes that don't have "I LUV YOU JESUS!" written on them "carnal"? Does it honor God to bake or eat a "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE" cake? It's simply a case of straining a gnat and swallowing a camel.

That and I don't think anybody bled to death from someone playing an Amy Grant CD in their direction (although I did come rather close when my sister was listening to Michael W. Smith :hehe:).

One Bad Pig

February 21st 2006, 05:00 PM

Here's their rule about weapons again:
All weapons must be turned in for storage. Trigger locks are required for pistols. Fireworks are not permitted on campus.

Not exactly something to get all hot and bothered about. It's tough for them to "convey hot lead" if they're locked up in storage.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 05:08 PM

Not exactly something to get all hot and bothered about.

Allowing students to bring guns on campus doesn't bother you at all? Believe me, I'm the last guy here to argue against the right to bear arms but the place is a bible school, not a ranger training facility.

It's tough for them to "convey hot lead" if they're locked up in storage.

If I want to blow somebody's brains out I'm not gonna tell the people I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna take it out of storage first and give a number of excuses that will work, including but not limited to "I'm going hunting",
"I want to clean my gun" and "I'm going home to visit my parents and taking everything with me".

Cynic Sage

February 21st 2006, 05:09 PM

Omega7, on the "Chemical Composition of Angels" (actual thread title, which he posted in Natural Science until it was moved to Unorthodox Theology):

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72097

If you look at the Angelic beings mentioned in the Bible ,

you see common traits .

1.They Radiate Energy which is possibly radioactive.

2. They give off alot of Light.

3. Their Legs and feet have the appearance of Beryl or Burnished Brass.

4. Their bodies seem to be vibrating at a higher resinance than humans.

How did God make them ?

Are they made of Plasma , Radioactive Material or Spirit.

And if Spirit then what is Spirit ?

Your thoughts.

11Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand. They encircled the throne and the living creatures and the elders.

12Then I, John, looked at myself and noticed a strange, discolored lump on my right breast. Blood poured from my nose, and the hair fell of my head.

Sparko

February 21st 2006, 05:20 PM

Allowing students to bring guns on campus doesn't bother you at all? Believe me, I'm the last guy here to argue against the right to bear arms but the place is a bible school, not a ranger training facility.

If I want to blow somebody's brains out I'm not gonna tell the people I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna take it out of storage first and give a number of excuses that will work, including but not limited to "I'm going hunting",
"I want to clean my gun" and "I'm going home to visit my parents and taking everything with me".

Ever hear of "target practice" or "hunting?" both are kinda big in the south and midwest. Guns have other purposes than to harm people.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 05:23 PM

Ever hear of "target practice" or "hunting?" both are kinda big in the south and midwest. Guns have other purposes than to harm people.

Please walk into a normal school gun in hand and tell them you just need it for target practice.

jpholding

February 21st 2006, 05:28 PM

Oh! Casting Crowns is a good band!

I'm not gonna win a screwball for that am I? :noid:

I have no idea. I have no idea what they sound like. I do know they're from around here though.

I'm gonna go listen to Yankovic's "Hardware Store" some more. As a hymn to modern religious feelings about hardware it's much better than anything our music minister has put up these days. Besides, I *can* see it being added to Beamer and Jelica's hymnal selection.

Philbot

February 21st 2006, 05:30 PM

Please walk into a normal school gun in hand and tell them you just need it for target practice.
All I know is that when I need to plot some points on a coordinate plane, nothing beats the good ol' .44 Magnum.

lfellows

February 21st 2006, 05:32 PM

I suppose it's not a good idea to say you're wrong and not explain why, so let me retry:

Violent books? Here's an excerpt from one of my favorite violent books:

Deu 13:6 "If your brother, the son of your mother, or your son or your daughter or the wife you embrace or your friend who is as your own soul entices you secretly, saying, 'Let us go and serve other gods,' which neither you nor your fathers have known,
Deu 13:7 some of the gods of the peoples who are around you, whether near you or far off from you, from the one end of the earth to the other,
Deu 13:8 you shall not yield to him or listen to him, nor shall your eye pity him, nor shall you spare him, nor shall you conceal him.
Deu 13:9 But you shall kill him. Your hand shall be first against him to put him to death, and afterward the hand of all the people.
Deu 13:10 You shall stone him to death with stones, because he sought to draw you away from the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.

It seems to me that the whiners who complain about violent movies/books/games either can't tell the difference between reality and fantasy (and assume nobody else can either) or don't realise that mankind in the west is so sheltered from the brutal reality that the rest of the world is exposed to that whacking virtual penguins into a target and getting a highscore in such a game needs to be banned from a school. To top it all off, you are allowed to bring guns there which, unlike video games, serve one purpose and one purpose alone: do harm. If only BJU was consistent, but apparently whacking evil scientists as a dirty bandecoot "fills our minds with violent thoughts" while bringing a shotgun that can redecorate an entire room with an unfortunate sap's brains is perfectly fine as long as you don't sleep and eat with it.

BJU is being consistent. The problem is your presumption that allowing students to keep hunting weapons or shooting weapons is wrongheaded. What is wrong with first presuming that their students are mature enough to know that shooting someone is not an acceptable response when someone insults or injures them?

Playing violent video games tends to desensitize the players to violence around them. Has nothing to do with being able to tell the difference between fantasy and reality. Everything we put into our minds stays there and impacts us. You may disagree, but God knew why He told the Jews to meditate upon the law daily and memorize it.

For some it keeps their testosterone in check by allowing them to blast away pixels instead of classmates with a BJU approved handheld mortar. On the other hand, picking my nose, wiping after I take a crap and writing inane drivel on the Internet hardly has anything to do with a God-honoring and Christ-centered life and I'm sure both of us have done all three.

Wow. If playing violent video games had such a wholesome impact in containing violent tendencies, then why do so many of the people who have shot teachers, fellow students, or co-workers admitt to playing them? I am not claiming a link between violent games and shooting someone, but your justification for playing violent games does not hold water.

No, it is concerned with stupid, religion related declarations or proclamations. By your definition he would give everyone he replies to a screwball award.

Scriptural or unscriputral isn't the issue, stupidity is. BJU is a fundy factory and their rules are idiotic.

OK. I am sorry I misunderstood the intent of this thread and mistakenly believed your nomination of BJU's rules was off topic. I understand you do not agree with BJU, but your claim that BJU is a fundy factory and that their rules are idiotic are merely your views and not supported by your claims.

Sparko

February 21st 2006, 05:38 PM

Please walk into a normal school gun in hand and tell them you just need it for target practice.

Actually a lot of schools have and allow extraciricular activities such as hunting and fishing clubs, or target range groups. So, yeah, you can take a gun to a 'normal' school. You could check it in for storage and check it out for target practice or to go hunting.

Sparko

February 21st 2006, 05:41 PM

but your claim that BJU is a fundy factory and that their rules are idiotic are merely your views and not supported by your claims.

I disagree with Darth about the gun issue -- but BJU is a wacko factory of the highest order. It has to do with their theology not their rules.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 05:44 PM

BJU is being consistent. The problem is your presumption that allowing students to keep hunting weapons or shooting weapons is wrongheaded. What is wrong with first presuming that their students are mature enough to know that shooting someone is not an acceptable response when someone insults or injures them?

I don't know. Why can't they presume that their students are mature enough to know that just because they can whack a monster with a club in a video game doesn't mean it's acceptable to do the same in real life?

Playing violent video games tends to desensitize the players to violence around them. Has nothing to do with being able to tell the difference between fantasy and reality. Everything we put into our minds stays there and impacts us. You may disagree, but God knew why He told the Jews to meditate upon the law daily and memorize it.

Does reading a violent book like the Bible do the same thing?

Wow. If playing violent video games had such a wholesome impact in containing violent tendencies, then why do so many of the people who have shot teachers, fellow students, or co-workers admitt to playing them?

Because they need to blame somebody for their stupidity/insanity. Plus, many of the cases I read about involve people playing video games they weren't supposed to play (IE: 13 year olds playing M rated games).

I am not claiming a link between violent games and shooting someone, but your justification for playing violent games does not hold water.

Actually to say it doesn't hold water you'll need to do more than a broad generalisation. You can compare video game statistics with crime statistics and see if there is a relation between them. I provided a logical reason why video games help: it gives people an alternative to going out in real life and wrecking havoc: they can do it on a computer instead with less consequences.

JSDileo

February 21st 2006, 05:49 PM

I have no idea. I have no idea what they sound like. I do know they're from around here though.

I'm gonna go listen to Yankovic's "Hardware Store" some more. As a hymn to modern religious feelings about hardware it's much better than anything our music minister has put up these days. Besides, I *can* see it being added to Beamer and Jelica's hymnal selection.

You can listen to one of my favorites of theirs here:

http://www.youtube.com/?v=Vd7QwRg-_CQ

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 05:52 PM

Actually a lot of schools have and allow extraciricular activities such as hunting and fishing clubs, or target range groups.

BJU doesn't seem to have one.
http://www.bju.edu/campus/life/orgs.html

So, yeah, you can take a gun to a 'normal' school. You could check it in for storage and check it out for target practice or to go hunting.

Can you give me an example of such a school? I must say I've never heard of schools allowing kids to bring guns in them. I have a teacher who moved to the US and her school has metal detectors at the doors to prevent people from bringing weapons of any kind.

lfellows

February 21st 2006, 06:14 PM

How do I explain this?

The purpose of rope is to tie things.

The purpose of Shoe-strings is to keep your shoes on.

The purpose of pens, pencils, and paper is to be used for writing and/or drawing.

The purpose of Music (and other forms of art) is to convey thoughts and emotions.

The purpose of firearms is to convey hot lead.

BTW: I am actually a Pro-gun guy. I believe that the gun laws where I live (Canada) are too restrictive and only hinder law-abiding citizens from obtaining guns rather than criminals and gang-members. But come on! Don't tell me you don't see anything messed up about a campus that bans music that doesn't mention God or Jesus (whoops, there goes "Song of Songs") and games where you have to shoot a terrorist to rescue an innocent hostage, yet allows you to bring an actual firearm on campus. It's like a Christian college having a strict modest-dress policy yet allowing sex-toys on campus.

How is BJU's allowing students to store their guns at campus anything like a Christian college allowing sex-toys on campus?

You seem to be suggesting that shooting someone is the only purpose for having a weapon at school. Could it possibly be that BJU recognizes that some of their students enjoy hunting or are members of shooting clubs and yet live too far away to reasonably commute home to retreive their weapons during the school year? Or are you claiming that hunting and shooting cannot be God-honoring and Christ-centered activities?

The way I see it is that music can be no more "Christian" than a cake can. Art is simply the droppings of Man's soul, whatever is in him will make it out, whether it be his dedication to God, love for a woman, sadness at the loss of a loved one, anger and hatred at what he believes is wrong in the world ect.

A chef may bake his cake to the Glory of God, another may simply bake because he is hungry, another because it's what the restaurant pays him to do. A chef could write "I LUV YOU JESUS!" on the cake, or even "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE!" or "I'M SORRY I FORGOT OUR ANNIVERSSARY JUNE!" in icing on his cake. Are any cakes that don't have "I LUV YOU JESUS!" written on them "carnal"? Does it honor God to bake or eat a "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE" cake? It's simply a case of straining a gnat and swallowing a camel.

That and I don't think anybody bled to death from someone playing an Amy Grant CD in their direction (although I did come rather close when my sister was listening to Michael W. Smith :hehe:).

Man can use his gift(s) to bring honor to God, or to bring honor to himself. BJU is attempting to train up God-honoring and Christ-centered men and women. How does one do that? In part by getting them mentally focused on God and who He is and on all that He has done. Does music that brings honor to the performer, or glorifies man, or appeals to man's baser lusts focus our minds on God and all He has done, or are they a distraction? If the music you listen to takes your mind off all that God has done and leads you to a false sense that you are sufficient in yourself, how does that help you become the person God wants you to be?

Realize this: not all who attend BJU are saved. If they are listening to music that acts to draw them away from God, how will they learn of their need for a savior and that Jesus died on the cross for their sins?

One Bad Pig

February 21st 2006, 06:52 PM

BJU doesn't seem to have one.
http://www.bju.edu/campus/life/orgs.html

Can you give me an example of such a school? I must say I've never heard of schools allowing kids to bring guns in them. I have a teacher who moved to the US and her school has metal detectors at the doors to prevent people from bringing weapons of any kind.
Guns are similarly allowed at Penn State. Please note that we're talking collegiate-level schools, not high schools.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 07:03 PM

Guns are similarly allowed at Penn State. Please note that we're talking collegiate-level schools, not high schools.

Penn State also has a rifle club. BJU doesn't have anything of the kind as far as I can tell.

Sparko

February 21st 2006, 08:18 PM

BJU doesn't seem to have one.
http://www.bju.edu/campus/life/orgs.html

Can you give me an example of such a school? I must say I've never heard of schools allowing kids to bring guns in them. I have a teacher who moved to the US and her school has metal detectors at the doors to prevent people from bringing weapons of any kind.

http://www.nrahq.org/compete/coldir.asp

http://www.law.harvard.edu/alumni/bulletin/2002/summer/bf_03.html

Cynic Sage

February 21st 2006, 08:55 PM

How is BJU's allowing students to store their guns at campus anything like a Christian college allowing sex-toys on campus?

Correction: A Christian college with a strict "modest-dress" dress-code allowing sex-toys on campus.

You seem to be suggesting that shooting someone is the only purpose for having a weapon at school. Could it possibly be that BJU recognizes that some of their students enjoy hunting or are members of shooting clubs and yet live too far away to reasonably commute home to retreive their weapons during the school year?

Guns can be used for target shooting and hunting (okay) or blowing someone's head off (not okay)

Sex-toys can be used by faithful married couples (okay) or by an individual or fornicating couple (not okay).

A student can go to the gun-locker, tell the guy there he needs it for hunting, get it, and then go hunting.

A student can go to the "uhh-you-know" locker, tell the guy there he needs it because "me an' the missuz have a special evening planned", get it, and then go "be with" his wife.

A student can go to the gun-storage locker, tell the guy there he needs it for hunting, get it, and then go blow John Q. Public's head off.

A student can go to the "uhh-you-know"-storage locker, tell the guy there he needs it because "me an' the missuz have a special evening planned", get it, and then go to the nearest swingers club.

Or are you claiming that hunting and shooting cannot be God-honoring and Christ-centered activities?

Uh, no, I'm not claiming they can't. Are you claiming that "shredding" an electring guitar or shooting alien space-pirates cannot be God-honoring and Christ-centered activities?

Man can use his gift(s) to bring honor to God, or to bring honor to himself. BJU is attempting to train up God-honoring and Christ-centered men and women. How does one do that? In part by getting them mentally focused on God and who He is and on all that He has done.

Does music that brings honor to the performer, or glorifies man, or appeals to man's baser lusts focus our minds on God and all He has done, or are they a distraction? If the music you listen to takes your mind off all that God has done and leads you to a false sense that you are sufficient in yourself, how does that help you become the person God wants you to be?

Does hunting that brings honor to the sportsman, or glorifies man, or appeals to man's baser lusts focus our mind on God and all he has done, or are they a distraction? If the animals you shoot to takes your mind off all that God has done and leads you to a false sense that you are sufficient in yourself, how does that help you become the person God wants you to be? :ahem:

(BTW: I am also pro-hunting. I just used that as an example to show you the holes in your reasoning).

Realize this: not all who attend BJU are saved.

Reading that, I just got this funny mental image in my head of an teenage athiest trying to decide which post-secondary school to attend.

Teen-Athiest: Hmmm. Bob Jones U. is sure to help me have a successfull career outside christian ministry in a secular field. But it sure has rather strict rules. No smoking, no drinking, no sex, no posters of musicians or movie stars, no rock music... (looks closer) Wow! Not even Christian rock music... and... DUDE! YOU CAN BRING GUNS AND HAVE THEM PUT IN STORAGE! I AM SO THERE!

If they are listening to music that acts to draw them away from God, how will they learn of their need for a savior and that Jesus died on the cross for their sins?

I had no idea that the Awesome power of the Holy Spirit could be so easily thwarted by the likes of INXS.

Here's a tip, Ifellows. Take a young person, put him in a special enviroment where he will only be exposed to "God-honoring" art, music, entertainment, and ideas for a certain period of time, and if he has accepted the Gospel before leaving, you have not ensured his salvation, if anything you have merely delayed his apostasy. That's the difference between Evangelism and Brainwashing.

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 09:05 PM

http://www.nrahq.org/compete/coldir.asp

I only skimmed through it but there's no mention of people bringing guns to school.

http://www.law.harvard.edu/alumni/bulletin/2002/summer/bf_03.html

It seems to me that the club goes to a shooting range. They don't bring the guns to school.

Dude, don't get me wrong, I'm not against gun ownership. My sole problem is with people bringing and keeping privately owned guns inside a school. I'm thinking you might have misunderstood me as neither of those links is related to this problem.

JSDileo

February 21st 2006, 09:09 PM

I only skimmed through it but there's no mention of people bringing guns to school.

It seems to me that the club goes to a shooting range. They don't bring the guns to school.

Dude, don't get me wrong, I'm not against gun ownership. My sole problem is with people bringing and keeping privately owned guns inside a school. I'm thinking you might have misunderstood me as neither of those links is related to this problem.
This reading y'all's discussion is becoming very annoying.

Philbot

February 21st 2006, 09:14 PM

This reading y'all's discussion is becoming very annoying.
Let's nominate them for screwball awards. :grin:

Darth Executor

February 21st 2006, 11:57 PM

Fine, I'll stop debating BJU's habit of keeping a weapon warehouse inside a school. :tongue:

JSDileo

February 21st 2006, 11:59 PM

Fine, I'll stop debating BJU's habit of keeping a weapon warehouse inside a school. :tongue:
Ouch. I'll admit, I've been pwned.

Cynic Sage

February 22nd 2006, 02:32 PM

Another Omega7 moment:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?p=1397501#post1397501

According to John1:1 , there are only 2 Gods.

The Holy Spirit is just a spirit combination that is a combination
of the Spirit essence of Jesus mixed with the Life giving spirit of the Father.

When Jesus went up to the Father , the Father Re-Glorified Jesus
and then absorbed the mental chararcter and resistance to sin
that Jesus learned and mixed it with His own and sent it down
to the Apostles as the Holy Spirit.

Joh 17:5 And now, O Father, glorify thou me with thine own self
with the glory which I had with thee before the world was.

1Co 2:16 For who hath known the mind of the Lord,
that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ.

Joh 14:23 Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him.

Joh 14:20 At that day ye shall know that I am in my Father,
and ye in me, and I in you.

Joh 15:4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me.

Ro 8:9 But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.
1Pe 1:11 Searching what, or what manner of time the Spirit of Christ which was in them did signify, when it testified beforehand the sufferings of Christ, and the glory that should follow.

And Vfarris, from the same thread:

According to the Bible there is only one God.

According to Christianity there are three.

Cynic Sage

February 22nd 2006, 02:55 PM

Omega7 sets herself up as Tweb's Bible-Answer chick:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72130

Ask me a Serious Question and I will try to answer .

eg. What happened after the Dinosaurs died ?

or The Chemical composition of God .

Cynic Sage

February 22nd 2006, 03:02 PM

Provoker currently has the most ironic sig line in the world:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/member.php?userid=7986

[attachment]
click to enlarge

:lol:

JSDileo

February 22nd 2006, 03:16 PM

Maybe that's in his "Philosophies I Disagree With' list?:huh:

Cynic Sage

February 23rd 2006, 12:21 AM

Omega7:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72130

Here's a question. How exactly would you obtain the information to answer serious questions like "what happened after the dinosaurs died?" and "what is the chemical composition of God?"?
----------
GOD is an Energy Being .
What kind of Energy Composition is the Question.
We know that HE emits alot of Light.
We know that HE has hands feet eyes face feet etc.
We know that HE made Angels out of something that gives off light too.
Mt 28:3 His countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow:
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Ok, since we have the Mind of Christ and He was the one who did
most of the Creating, we have to ask ourselves , what would God do
in this situation.
1. We have here a Rebellious Angel called Lucifer who tried to Kill us.
2. Now you cannot trust any of your Angels because any one of them
could Rebel too.
3. So, Johnny ECHammer , what would you do if you were God
in this situation ??????
3a. Would you Kill off all the Angels and start anew ?
3b. Would you just forget about it and go off and make more stars.
3c. Or would you go off to another similar Solar System and
make a physical being that would Learn to Appreciate all the goodies
that God offers. eg . Immortal Life, Eternally Happy and interesting life?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Dude! It's like she gets her theology from Far-Side cartoons. :lmbo:

Cynic Sage

February 23rd 2006, 01:17 PM

Seasanctuary actually has a thread titled "I'm Better Than God":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72252

God is a morally odd fellow. No crime is too heinous for him to stop here on Earth; yet after this Earth every slight misdemeanor earns us an eternity in God's dungeon of torments.

He errs on both sides.

Today he bears the guilt of moral apathy. For he is able to safely save us from car accidents, tidal waves, murder sprees, and rapists...but he's not willing. The next time you hear about one of these atrocities, keep in mind that God was right there...not helping.

Tommorrow he promises to outdo every human who has ever caused another pain. All human crimes pale next to the eternal evil God will continually maintain to torment us. Bind - Torture - Never Kill. In restrospect, God's apathy should come as no surprise if his conscience is this seared and malicious.

Now I'm not perfect. No human is...or has to be to look like a shining example of virtue and care next to such a monster. We either fail to achieve such a level of moral detachment or fail to commit such infinite violations against our neighbor. We're better because we lack the capacity to be so bad.

There's only so many "evil for humans; good for God" explanations before this all becomes apparent. I wouldn't trust the tactics of appeasement to last forever against such a one. There is no safety against an evil God.

To be safe, we'd better bomb heaven. :hehe:

Cynic Sage

February 23rd 2006, 06:24 PM

Provoker, on "Bible Scholars":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72267

I have noticed that many Christian bible scholars have a tendancy to dismiss pre-first century scripture, and put more faith in post first century BC scripture.
Pre-first century scripture obviously has seniority, and was obviously the only scripture that Jesus and his apostles used to preach the gospel.
Post first century BC scripture was under the complete control of Romans, virtually from the time it was written, while pre-first century scriptures were well established, well known, and well travelled, long before Jesus and the apostles used them to preach the gospel, and long before Romans even had an interest in scripture.
Why is there an obvious Christian bias against pre-first century scripture?

:lmbo:

JSDileo

February 23rd 2006, 06:26 PM

Provoker, on "Bible Scholars":

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72267

:lmbo:
:huh:

I can't understand what he's saying. It's too incoherent.

Cynic Sage

February 23rd 2006, 06:29 PM

:huh:

I can't understand what he's saying. It's too incoherent.
Click on the link, notice the thread title?

He thinks the NT is "post first-century".

That, and he is completely unaware of how Bible Scholars regard the NT, not surprising since he claimed to be one while saying his qualifications were grade 12 english. :lol:

Cynic Sage

February 23rd 2006, 09:38 PM

Tladatsi, on how God didn't want humans to have free-will:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72266&page=1&pp=16

One of the on-going arguments about the "Problem of Evil" is that God wanted mankind to have free-will. Evil is an inevitiable by-product (collateral damage if you like) of free will.

The main problem with this argument is that God did not want mankind (or at least Adam and Eve) to have free-will. In Genesis 2 and 3 we are told that God had planted two trees in the garden of Eden. The fruit of these trees gave whoever ate them certain powers. One was the power of knowing good from evil. The other was immortality.

We are also told that Adam and Eve did not know good from evil. I think it is safe to say that one cannot exercise free will without knowledge about the implications. How can one choose good over evil if you cannot tell them apart. This is how God created Adam and Eve, without that ability. Further, God forbids Adam and Eve from obtaining that knowledge and ability by eating the special fruit of knowledge of good and evil.

So God did not want mankind to have free will, it was the talking snake that did. Why did the snake want mankind to have free will, the Bible does not say. Nor does it explain why God placed the magical tree that could give mankind free will in Eden. There it is nonetheless.

God tells them "the day you eat therof you shall surely die" and they didn't have "knowledge of the implications"? :huh:

Pate

February 24th 2006, 03:34 AM

We have a new winner! :lol:

The following is my translation from a post in a Finnish discussion forum.

The writer uses the name "Logos", but JPH actually knows his real name. :wink:

This guy sees conspiracies everywhere in the ancient world, especially when it comes to something that's related to Christianity.

He now seems to endorse the absurd idea that Josephus and Paul were the same person. Here's his "evidence":

1. Both of them were Pharisees.
2. Both were hellenistic Jews.
3. Both are known for their literary works, and both produced their works with upper-class Koine greek.
4. Josephus tells that he knows many ancient dramas. In acts, there's an episode that narrates Paul's conversion, and the saying "hard to kick against the goad" which has its origin in a drama (written by Jospehus himself?), is used.
5. Paul (paulos) means "small". Josephus mentions Mathhias Curtus as his forefather. Curtus means "small".
6. Paul was in his famous shipwreck when he was on his way to Rome. Josephus also mentions that he was shipwrecked when on his way to Rome.
7. Both were in Rome during the well-known fire in 64CE
8. Paul spent 2 years in inprisonment in Caesarea when waiting for his trip to Rome. Josephus was inprisoned for 2 years during the Jewish war in 67-69CE and he was apparently kept in Caesarea. He too ended up in Rome.
9. Paul disappears into desert for three years after the Damascus incident. Josephus mentions that he had been in the desert with a hermit named Banus for a period of three years when he was young.
10. After the Jewish war, Josephus became a traitor in the eyes of the Jews, and he lived in Rome, apparently for reasons of safety, and wrote his apologies. Paul became a traitor and a 'renegade of the law' in the eyes of the Jews, and there were many attempts to kill him.

If I hadn't read some of the previous posts by this same person, I'd probably think that this was a joke, but no - I have every reason to believe that he's serious with this! :lolo:

Cynic Sage

February 24th 2006, 02:08 PM

JSDileo

February 24th 2006, 02:16 PM

Cynic Sage

February 24th 2006, 10:18 PM

Provoker, once again on Bible Scholars:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72267&page=1&pp=16

...
I'm not sure what the difference is between a scholar, and a "real" scholar, but I use the word "scholar", meaning anyone who reads with the intention of learning.

We have a failure to be consistent here.

Hello Jedidiah:
What is inconsistent here? Scholars were around long before colleges were, and people with scholarly qualifications are not necessarily scholars, but are more likely to be memorizers of some scholars opinions...LOL

"I'm a real Bible Scholar. 'qualifications' are for losers".

Honestly, it's like something Homer Simpson would say if he logged on Tweb.

Darth Executor

February 24th 2006, 10:40 PM

Some comic relief:

http://www.chick.com/seasonal/halloween/vampireletter.asp

JSDileo

February 24th 2006, 10:56 PM

Some comic relief:

http://www.chick.com/seasonal/halloween/vampireletter.asp
Ewww, that's gross.:eww:

jpholding

February 25th 2006, 10:32 AM

Email I just got -- in its entirety.

Watch for the 7 rings of fire
Daniel Joseph 3

I asked him:

"Why? Are you planning to jump through them?" :lolo:

Darth Executor

February 25th 2006, 12:33 PM

Email I just got -- in its entirety.

I asked him:

"Why? Are you planning to jump through them?" :lolo:

I think Sauron wants them back, though I didn't know you were a dwarf JP. :teeth:

jpholding

February 25th 2006, 03:16 PM

I think Sauron wants them back, though I didn't know you were a dwarf JP. :teeth:

Well, aren't they the ones who kick shins in battle? I'm good at that. :eek:

Darth Executor

February 25th 2006, 03:21 PM

Well, aren't they the ones who kick shins in battle? I'm good at that. :eek:

Well, everyone in LOTR can kick shins in battle. It's all a matter of how you do it. If hammers or axes are your thing, you're a dwarf. :tongue:

JSDileo

February 25th 2006, 04:38 PM

Well, everyone in LOTR can kick shins in battle. It's all a matter of how you do it. If hammers or axes are your thing, you're a dwarf. :tongue:
I always thought that Holding was a hobbit.

Maybe Pepper is Arwen?:huh:

Darth Executor

February 25th 2006, 04:44 PM

I always thought that Holding was a hobbit.

:lol:

Maybe Pepper is Arwen?:huh:

That would make me Aragorn, which is an almost perfect fit. :tongue:

Cynic Sage

February 25th 2006, 04:47 PM

Some comic relief:

http://www.chick.com/seasonal/halloween/vampireletter.asp

You think that's weird, check out this:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0094/0094_01.asp

Is that "New-Age healer" wearing a giant condom?

Darth Executor

February 25th 2006, 04:56 PM

You think that's weird, check out this:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0094/0094_01.asp

:rofl:

Is that "New-Age healer" wearing a giant condom?

Nut unless it's a condom for, err, special needs. :teeth:

JSDileo

February 25th 2006, 05:04 PM

You think that's weird, check out this:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0094/0094_01.asp

Is that "New-Age healer" wearing a giant condom?
If I didn't know better, I would think that was a Landover Baptist type parody of futurism. Unfortunately, it isn't.:lolo:

One Bad Pig

February 25th 2006, 06:25 PM

You think that's weird, check out this:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0094/0094_01.asp

:twitch:

Darth Executor

February 25th 2006, 10:53 PM

etb_wm_sharon is back. Go here for a good laugh:
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72456

Philbot

February 25th 2006, 11:40 PM

etb_wm_sharon is back. Go here for a good laugh:
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72456
Bah! You beat me to it. :wink:

Darth Executor

February 26th 2006, 12:29 AM

Same thread

Yes, you should remember me. You grilled me on the thread about Pornography and its negative effects on women.
Ever notice a woman's input is always irrelevant, unless it agrees with exactly what men want to hear?

Incidentally, Ed Babinski apparently feels slightly different than he once did.
Instead of hearing only opinions about what women like from those chauvenist magazines like Flynt's (out to make a fast buck selling women's flesh) --Ed's been hearing something from a victim of statutory rape (myself) oh, :lol: rape is just good clean humor isn't it Darth Executor?

Just "humor" when a rape victim suffers Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and must finally (no alternative) seek counseling, and sleeping pills ... it's just "humor" isn't it? :lol: You're not educated enough to know what PTSD is, or to empathise with rape victims. So who are you to talk man?

You are a sick demented person.

Ed Babinski has changed his mind about a few things it seems:

Ed Babinski's Dangerous Idea
January 30, 2006, Edward T. Babinski wrote: I think the majority of human male primates on this planet are muscle bound testosterone driven brutes who commonly seek either psychological or physical domination over other males, females, and children. Males continue to fill our prisons more than women do. Just google up all the major horror stories reported by the news any day of the year and males continue to make bold verbal threats and murder and wage wars. Males continue to murder males galore even in their own coutries in gang warfare, organized crime, family disputes, robberies, and of course rape, torture and murder of females and children as well.
And holy books continue to contain verses about females being there to "serve and obey" males, which is also the message of the apes of the secular world as well. Even Hinduism preaches that being reincarnated as a female is not equal to being reincarnated as a male. Actually, I suspect the reverse is nearer the truth and that being reincarnated as a female is something more Hindu males ought to aspire to. I also suspect that more Muslim and Christian male ought to listen to females and make plans together with them rather than continue to inculcate in the female mind the necessity of "serving and obeying" them.
Still, even in an ideal world without males being physically and psychologically more dominating due to the effects of testosterone, I imagine that communication would remain difficult, as it often is even between two females, or two males. So there is no obvious solution to all the world's difficulties in reaching agreements. Also, some males are quite good at science and technology and at devoting themselves toward fixing some of the world's problems. Other law abiding males are relatively benign in the effects they have on society. Still others make mistakes and ask to be forgiven. So, the domineering and violent tendencies of male human beings in general must not be confused with every male--that would be a case of irrational prejudice.
In the end the only real resource we have for the future of humanity is the education of both males and females, both being allowed to pursue the quest for knowledge and a higher education and creativity as far as they each can go.

Everyone place your bets. How many posts will it take until I become a rapist and a woman beater?

jpholding

February 26th 2006, 08:49 AM

etb_wm_sharon is back. Go here for a good laugh:
http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72456

Screwy? I'm mentioned in the thread title and the post doesn't have a thing to do with me. :glare: It addresses none of my articles (all that nonsense about leprosy etc I deal with in my article on ritual purity) and doesn't name me at all.

The troll trio is already there (Minny, Picth a Fit Pat, Moonbeam) I see. Have fun, boys. It's already past my threshhold of tolerance for fundy atheist stupidity these days. :thumbd:

If hammers or axes are your thing, you're a dwarf.

Hammers sound good. The type wielded by toons especially, that are 50 feet in diameter and you can pull out from behind your back at a moment's notice.

I always thought that Holding was a hobbit.

I'm a shapeshifter. I can BE a hobbit when the need arises. :rasberry:

jpholding

February 26th 2006, 08:55 AM

You think that's weird, check out this:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0094/0094_01.asp

Is that "New-Age healer" wearing a giant condom?

Amazing. The forces of the Anti-Christ are coneheads. :glare: Did someone inform Dan Akroyd?

Darth Executor

February 26th 2006, 09:56 AM

Screwy? I'm mentioned in the thread title and the post doesn't have a thing to do with me. :glare: It addresses none of my articles (all that nonsense about leprosy etc I deal with in my article on ritual purity) and doesn't name me at all.

The troll trio is already there (Minny, Picth a Fit Pat, Moonbeam) I see. Have fun, boys. It's already past my threshhold of tolerance for fundy atheist stupidity these days. :thumbd:

Actually I'm bored of it already. Amasing what a good night's sleep can do.

The Laughing Man

February 26th 2006, 11:14 AM

Another candidate. Not a very formidable one, though. Just your typical run-of-the-mill atheist trying to play Bible-debunker.

http://canadiancynic.blogspot.com/2006/02/dear-jinx-heres-your-chance-to-shine.html

Yes, that's me he's referring to. Notice how he's quite adept at burning straw men, particularly when I try to explain inerrancy to him.

The Laughing Man

February 26th 2006, 11:28 AM

You think that's weird, check out this:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0094/0094_01.asp

Is that "New-Age healer" wearing a giant condom?

Hey, get it right. He's "a famous New Age Healer." In fact, he's so famous that his name doesn't even need to be used. :lol:

Cynic Sage

February 26th 2006, 04:57 PM

Darth Executor

February 26th 2006, 05:09 PM

Uh, what the heck were you talking about regarding inerracny anyways?

I'm guessing it's not your spelling. :teeth:

Cynic Sage

February 26th 2006, 07:14 PM

A nomination for this site: http://members.shaw.ca/tfrisen/welcome.html

For this:

http://members.shaw.ca/tfrisen/Prayer/Prayer.html

Nothing could be clearer than the following verses: Matthew 6:5 - 7 5. And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites [are]: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. Jesus says you must definitely not pray as the hypocrites pray.

6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.
7 But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen [do]: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.

Here Jesus says when thou prayest, you must pray this way:
(1) enter into thy closet.
(2) shut the door.
(3) pray to thy Father which is in secret.
(4) use not vain repetitions. (Prayer must be in private, not in front of other people.
Do not repeat things over and over again in prayer) An attribute of a true Christian is: He only prays in private, never in public.

...

1 Thessalonians 5:17 17 Pray without ceasing.

Acts 1:14 14 These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication, with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brethren.(Paul seems to do the opposite to what Jesus says to do in prayer
-- they prayed together and he admonishes people to make long
prayers, that is pray all the time -- this seems impossible!)

(Referring to the last verse -- perhaps they each prayed in
silence, so they didn't pray in front of others)

He/She thinks Paul is literally telling folks to pray 24/7. :rofl:

I also found this article hillarious:

http://members.shaw.ca/tfrisen/Science/belief_control.htm

How can people control the religious aspect of our being for those that have this disposition?
Some possibilities:

(1) As mentioned, make use of and "talk" to your internal "God" knowing this God is personal and not some external reality outside of your brain.

(2) Believe the minimum that makes you feel comfortable -- realize that these beliefs are based on faith, not scientific evidence.

...

"You can believe a religious belief, just remember not to beleive that beleif to be true." :lol: I love it when they try to tell us how to be more "spiritual".

Cynic Sage

February 26th 2006, 07:25 PM

She ever always was a stupid fundy,
Hermeneutics never changed since her apostasy,
And when you read her latest postings, then you will see...
She is the one called Sharon Moon!

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72456

Darth Executor

February 26th 2006, 09:08 PM

Lazy Agnostic in sharon's thread:

Of course, it makes more sense to consider that the authors of the OT were basing their prohibitions on trial & error health concerns. Isn't the concept of "ritual purity" an apologetic device to cover for what amounts to the ancient pathogenic ignorance and the needless mysogyny of a supposedly omniscient and all-loving deity?

Shyure-it-is.

The Laughing Man

February 26th 2006, 11:13 PM

Uh, what the heck were you talking about regarding inerracny anyways?

It's from an eariler exchange. He tried to prove that the Bible was full of errors and contradictions, but not once did he show any understanding of the doctrine of inerrancy. He and his clan of fans thought it referred to the copies we have today. I attempted to explain that inerrancy refers to the autographs (i.e. the original writings by the original authors), but he twisted that into me saying that not only did you have to read the Bible in the original languages, but read the autographs, too.

Cynic Sage

February 26th 2006, 11:43 PM

Pitchforkpat, on women and the Bible:

http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1402857&postcount=19

Especially when it comes to the authors of the books of the Bible, one of the seminal forces of misogyny. Of course it had to be Eve’s fault that “sin” entered the world. If a woman has sex before marriage she is to be stoned to death. Not so a man. And of course we have Paul’s classic admonition for women not to speak in church.

Apparently Pat must've skipped Romans 5:12. :hehe:

One Bad Pig

February 27th 2006, 01:05 AM

Sheli, on church:

Home group fellowships are where it is at. Nowhere else.

Organized religion did not occur until Emperor Constantine appropriated Christianity. He mixed it with organized Paganism, its churches, priests, buildings, wealth, ceremonies, astrological celebrations, mythology, and popular acceptance. The result was Catholicism, and later its child, Protestantism.

Source (http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showpost.php?p=1403771&postcount=47)

{Tim}

February 27th 2006, 05:45 AM

Here's a nomination for LGM: http://www.theologyweb.com/campus/showthread.php?t=72206&page=4&pp=15

You kind of have to read the whole thread to get it fully, but here's a brief summary:

. "Brian" posted, detailing why he didn't think there was a rational basis for morality in an atheistic worldview.
. LGM replied by saying yes there was, and it was our herd instincts (or something along those lines -- it doesn't matter exactly what).
. Brian said he thought that LGM was using a different definition of rational than he was, and explained that he meant "logically derivable from the axioms of your worldview".
. LGM said that that wasn't the definition of "rational", and that brian was deliberately misrepresenting him.
. Brian posted again, and gave a precise definition of what he meant, and told LGM that this was what he meant by "rational" in his question, and if he (LGM) used a different definition, he wasn't actually answering the question that he (Brian) asked.
. LGM responded by saying that brian hadn't given a definition of "rational", and repeating his own definion.
. Brian (obviously he's very patient) posted once more his definition, explained his reasoning once more, and then said he wouldn't be participating any further.
. LGM told him that "[you] either haven't read my posts, or you don't understand them", and then said that "You still haven't given a definition of what "rational" is". :doh:

If that's not grounds for a lifetime Stupid Award, I don't know what is. :duh:

(And that's not mentioning all the red herrings and assorted other "debating" techniques LGM threw out and which Brian carefully ignored... :ahem:)