For mature only

[Seeton]

All right yall. I'm coming to my brethren and sistren to find out information. I don't want to cause a stir and I don't want little kiddies reading this. However, since I'm too embarrased to ask anyone their opinion, I'm just gonna ask the whole world on the internet.

This is a question about sexuality.

Do Not crank on this thread. Please keep all snide remarks away. This is racey enough as is.

What are the moral implications of oral sex? I don't want crazy details. What I'm wondering about is whether or not a man and a woman who are in the confines of marriage could morally consider this as an acceptable and pure expression of their love for each other.

Are there aspects of devaluation involved even in the best circumstances, or are there cituations where it is a noncoercive enjoyable pastime.

Thank you brethren and sistren ahead of time for your maturity.

I pray that this will be an edifying thread as opposed to one that gets me banned.

[Xmansmommy]

:nc:

[Jaltus]

I would say that it is within the confines of marriage, and thus between husband and wife.

Freedom in Christ, I'd say.

[yxboom]

I am keeping this open for discussion. He did ask permission to post this and has been given it. It will remain open and any participant who can not reply in a mature, respectable manner will be asked to not post anymore in this thread.

[bar Jonah]

Today @ 11:44 PM post located here (http://www.theologyweb.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&postid=160813#post160813)
Jaltus:
I would say that it is within the confines of marriage, and thus between husband and wife.

Freedom in Christ, I'd say.
I definitely agree with Jaltus. There is absolutely no moral or legal prohibition on it. If a member of a marriage believes it's wrong, the couple should abstain. It should not be a spiritual stumbling block to someone. I believe Romans 14 covers this.

That said, freedom in Christ.

[studyhound]

:eeke:
As long as both sides are in agreement, and both are understanding in what is going to happen (no spurising the other). Talking about sex with your spouce can make the over all experince better.

[Little Cow]

Well I must say I was quite suprised to see this thread.

My opinion in the matter goes along with what I have read so far. As long as husband and wife are consenting, I see nothing wrong with it. :eek:

[Paulbarbee]

I can't see anything Biblically wrong w/ it and my interpretation sees it in Song of Solomon 2.3, possibly elsewhere.

[RevSteve45]

Seeton,

I would say that, as a general rule, consentual sexual acts between a man & wife are permitted, unless it involves sexual sin, such as bringing a third party into the couple's sex life:

1 Cor 7:3-5, The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.
4 The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. (NIV)

Heb 13:4, Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. (KJV)

I would say that this word, "undefiled," would cover all connsentual sex between a man & wife that does not involve sin.

In His Service,
Steve

[Xmansmommy]

Great response RevSteve! :thumb:

[RevSteve45]

Let me re-emphasize here that I am referring only to CONSENTUAL sexual acts between a man & wife.

I am not married, but if I was, I would never ask my wife to take part in sexual acts that she did not like, or that she found distasteful or perverted. Just because I think that I might enjoy a particular sexual act, does not mean that SHE will enjoy it, and vice-versa.

That's what I believe the verses from 1 Corinthians 7 are talking about, is a mutual respect for our spouse's sexual wants & needs. If she wants sex a certain way, or a certain number of times, I should do my best to meet her desires, and she should do the same for me. In that sense, my body "belongs" to her, and her body "belongs" to me, for we are one flesh in the sexual relationship. To withold sexual pleasure from each other would be selfish, and not loving each other as Christ loved the Church, and gave His life for it.

Eph 5:28-29, So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: (KJV)

In His Service,
Steve

[mickiel]

It is the answer i would agree with. It can also be a reverse pain. What if the wife believes it is unholy to kiss? What if the man believes it is spiritual for the wife to be covered while engageing in sex? What if the wife believes God does not want her to have sex on sunday? What if the husband believes his wife is boring, so he decides that God wants him to take another woman? Who in their right reason would consent to these?

I know a man who had his wife shave all her hair off below her head because he saw that as "manly". Spiritual teaching MUST be reasonable or people will exalt it to unreasonable heights, all still in THEIR effort to be spiritual. One minister can perminantly damage a couple trying to find reason in their spiritual lives, which is why i would STRONGLY SUGGEST to a couple to N E V E R allow anyonelse to referee your bedroom. Do not allow OTHERS OPINON to influence your relations with your wife. If you don't know how to be in relations, learn between each other or wait till you know to have relations.

[Dee Dee Warren]

I agree with everything said. Thank you for your sensitivity and tact in such a subject.

[Iceman]

I'm amazed that not a single post has supported abstinence from oral sex. Does anyone have something to offer from another viewpoint?

[RevSteve45]

I'm amazed that not a single post has supported abstinence from oral sex. Does anyone have something to offer from another viewpoint?

Iceman,

The reason why no one has supported abstinence from oral sex, is that Scripture is silent on the subject. Unlike, for instance, homosexuality, Scripture offers nothing either positive or negative to say about oral sex. Therefore, we must address it as Scripture would address all OTHER sexual activity between a man & wife.

In His Service,
Steve

[Glenn P]

We can do whatever God does not forbid.

[Pilgrim]

I think we have pretty well answered this question and I'm very pleased to see it handled in such a mature way. TWeb rocks.

[Socrates]

RevSteve45:

Iceman,

The reason why no one has supported abstinence from oral sex, is that Scripture is silent on the subject. Unlike, for instance, homosexuality, Scripture offers nothing either positive or negative to say about oral sex. Therefore, we must address it as Scripture would address all OTHER sexual activity between a man & wife.

In His Service,
Steve


Theonomy:

We can do whatever God does not forbid.

:idea: I think you're both right! :thumb:

[Seeton]

I want to thank everyone for their participation in a racey thread.

Since I posted, It was my last day working at Lifeway.

I went over to the marriage books and peeked a look at Roseneau's "The celebration of Sex with illustraitons." (also known as Christian porn. Chris Chillin calls it the Christian Kama Sutra.) On page 137 it talked about Oral sex. It said exactly what ya'll said that it is between the man and the woman. Then it gave some tips. I had to put the book back at that point. Me being a young impressionable man who is far from marriage.

I appreciate ya'll honesty. Now we can all go back to our snickering of huddled addolescence.

[bar Jonah]

Yesterday @ 11:48 PM post located here (http://www.theologyweb.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&postid=166531#post166531)
Seeton:
I want to thank everyone for their participation in a racey thread.

Since I posted, It was my last day working at Lifeway.

I went over to the marriage books and peeked a look at Roseneau's "The celebration of Sex with illustraitons." (also known as Christian porn. Chris Chillin calls it the Christian Kama Sutra.) On page 137 it talked about Oral sex. It said exactly what ya'll said that it is between the man and the woman. Then it gave some tips. I had to put the book back at that point. Me being a young impressionable man who is far from marriage.

I appreciate ya'll honesty. Now we can all go back to our snickering of huddled addolescence.
To be honest, I find books like that to be highly inappropriate and unedifying. Few people know that Tim LaHaye wrote a book like that, although it wasn't quite as explicit. My friend Adam found it in the books he bought off a closing Christian used book store for his own store. We were both shocked and disgusted.

[Seeton]

To be honest, I find books like that to be highly inappropriate and unedifying. Few people know that Tim LaHaye wrote a book like that, although it wasn't quite as explicit. My friend Adam found it in the books he bought off a closing Christian used book store for his own store. We were both shocked and disgusted.

Are you married? Everyone that I've talked to who is married, has been blessed by those "Christian Sex Manuals."

A friend who is in the room right now says that his brother really enjoyed that roseneau book.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience. I agree though, if your not married, those books could be very bad. I could see how they could be bad even if you are.

[bar Jonah]

Today @ 12:49 AM post located here (http://www.theologyweb.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&postid=173241#post173241)
Seeton:
Are you married? Everyone that I've talked to who is married, has been blessed by those "Christian Sex Manuals."

A friend who is in the room right now says that his brother really enjoyed that roseneau book.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience. I agree though, if your not married, those books could be very bad. I could see how they could be bad even if you are.
I was not only communicating my own opinion but that of every married Christian I know here in Denver who has seen that book. Adam himself is happy in a wonderful Christian marriage. Why people should seek to "benefit" from an explicit, vulgar "sex manual" as you put it... is beyond any of us.

[Esther]

If that's the one you mean, I don't remember anything [visually] explicit except illustrations of anatomy, which is no different than what you'd see in a science or health textbook. I thought that and Intended for Pleasure were tastefully done (as tasteful as one can be when publishing a Bible-based sex book) - but then I'd rather read about something like that than risk the embarrassment of talking to another living soul about it. :shocked: Were you referring to the illustrations or the advice?

[ChrisChillin]

Esther:

According to Seeton, the book is called The Celebration of Sex with Illustrations

RightIdea:

I would appreciate some elaboration on what makes that book vulgar, explicit, and wrong. Is it wrong to suggest technique? Do you think certain acts would be sinful? Or are you reacting mainly against the illustrations? Do you feel that there is something wrong with seeking to enhance the pleasure of the experience, or the way these books go about it?

[Esther]

I was wondering if it was the LaHaye's Act of Marriage book that RightIdea was referring to.

[Mike K]

Don't do it! It's morally wrong, and is a sin!


Not really, but since no one else would post in the negative... :smile: