View Full Version : Messages of Condolence for Bandecoot's Family
November 28th 2006, 02:11 PM
This thread is specifically for messages to the family of Mr. Andrew Bentley, whom we all knew as Bandecoot. It will be forwarded to the family when complete.
Note: This thread is very strictly non-debate and any post deemed inappropriate will be deleted.
November 28th 2006, 02:13 PM
I don't really know what to say, but he meant a lot to us and we really miss him. I know that doesn't compare to your loss but I just wanted to let you know.
Stupid hug smilies really don't do the job, but it's all I can do for now.
November 28th 2006, 02:29 PM
I am sorry for your loss.
He was a wonderful guy, and loved by many.
He is sadly missed.
November 28th 2006, 02:33 PM
Bandecoot was a great person to talk to and know. He'd provide laughs and smiles to everyone he talked to, whether he agreed with them or not. His humor and personality will be missed by all he knew.
I'm sorry for your loss.
November 28th 2006, 02:35 PM
To the family of Bandecoot (Andrew) -
Our sincerest condolences on your loss. We will miss him.
November 28th 2006, 02:58 PM
Andrew touched a lot of hearts here in our Tweb community. He will be sadly missed. You are in our thoughts and prayers.
November 28th 2006, 03:20 PM
We shared a similar wicked and dark sense of humour. He was the master, and in the short while I knew him, it was a privilege to witness a few of his fine moments. We shared a fondness for Scottish malt whisky, in particular Laphroaig. We often shared a virtual glass (or two). On Paltalk, he always greeted me as "ya manky Scots git", which was as fine a term of endearment as I could have wished for. I gather we also had a similar sense of fashion!
I cannot begin to comprehend your loss, but for all of us here at Tweb, it's as if one of the pillars has been removed. A dear friend has been taken and I miss him terribly.
With love and deepest sympathy,
John (Glasgow, Scotland)
November 28th 2006, 04:01 PM
Andrew was a fixture here at Tweb. All of us who have gotten to know him, even a little bit, will miss him more than we can express.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you go through these difficult days.
November 28th 2006, 04:44 PM
As you probably know, Andrew touched the lives of people all over the world. We all loved him. I am from the USA (Kentucky) and he was a dear friend even though we never met in person. We used to chat online in Pal Talk every weekend. He used to love to tease me about the silly little numa numa video I made and my hillbilly accent. He brought the chat room to life with his humor and personality. I will miss him so much. I send my prayers out for you, his family.
Sparko, his hillbilly pirate buddy.
November 28th 2006, 05:44 PM
I'm known at TheologyWeb and PalTalk as "Jardin," pronounced phonetically because so few seemed to be able to manage the French or even realized what the word was. Andrew always seemed to be in the PalTalk room when I arrived and could be counted on to greet me with the proper pronounciation - Szhar-dahn - with a relish that gave away much more than his intellect. I experienced him as fiercely mischievious...showing off his considerable knowledge not so much for boastful purposes but for the sheer joy of rubbing the noses of others in the dust at his feet (in an utterly lovable fashion). Andrew teased, educated, sang, laughed, and somehow managed to make this Christian forget he was an atheist - even as he was clearly articulating the words, "There is no God." There was so much love in his heart and so much respect for those of us he seemed to believe were misguided in our faith, I am want to believe there may have been more going on there than met the eye.
I lost 4 family members in 2004...a year that I sometimes thought I would never recover from. Three of those losses were sudden and unexpected, so I believe I can claim I may have some notion what you are now enduring. Andrew offered me some well-placed and well-phrased words of condolence and encouragement during that time. How I wish I could remember them clearly enough to offer them back to you now.
I pray you find some comfort in the knowledge that Andrew's life touched many he never met...some of us finding out later than we would prefer just how remarkable an individual this man was. Many tears have been shed as this news reaches our online community. Mine are not yet spent.
Andrew once spent months trying to figure out how to mail me a bottle of Portuguese wine he raved about in exchange for a special book I'd had inscribed and sent to him. US customs law would not allow him to honor his half of this arrangement and I know it irked him. When the dust settles, I would like to know the name of that wine so I can find it for myself, raise a glass in his memory, and close the deal my way. You may email me at email@example.com if you wish.
I will pray for God's comfort and covering for you. Thank you for sharing Andrew with us.
Jacksonville, Florida (USA)
November 28th 2006, 06:16 PM
I interacted with him maybe once or twice, but read enough of his messages otherwise to know that, indeed, he was a memorable fellow.
November 28th 2006, 07:37 PM
I'm a fairly recent member of TWeb, but I know he had a distinctive, clear style of writing and I enjoyed reading his posts. The topic of cooking was especially fun to peruse.
Praying for your comfort during this difficult time.
Barstow, California, USA
November 28th 2006, 07:49 PM
I can't improve on what others have said. He was a great guy and I was privileged to know him.
My deepest sympathy goes out to his family and friends.
Rest in peace, Andrew. The world is a poorer place for your passing.
(ex-pat Brit, currently living in Denver, Colorado, USA)
November 28th 2006, 08:07 PM
Dearest Kara :hug:,
My deepest and heartfelt sympathies go out to you and your family as you have lost such a special loved one as Andrew. As many have already expressed, he touched the lives of so many of us here on TWeb. My earliest memories of Andrew were of encouraging him to join TWeb and to yodel. His response was that it was an abomination to yodel. :hehe: I remember many times after the TWeb room would close, he would open his room on Paltalk and invite all of us in. On many occasion he would play his funky music and everyone would listen and chat in text. He was always so kind, witty and funny. He always said it was my fault that he joined TWeb because I badgered him into joining. :lol:
I've shed quite a few tears since I heard because I will truly miss him. And while he touched so many of us via the internet, I can only imagine your pain is all the more. May you find comfort during this difficult time and if there is anything any of us can do to help in any way, please let us know. May he live on in our hearts in all the many ways he touched each of us. For me, I will always think of him when I hear a yodel. Despite his aversion to it, I know he enjoyed our fruitless efforts to get him to do it also.
Our prayers are with you.
Dee Dee Warren
November 28th 2006, 08:09 PM
I am not great at writing stuff like this, but I cared for Bande very dearly. I was in utter shock the morning I got the news to the point where I couldn't stop shaking. I know we never met personally, but it was like losing one of my good friends. He was always there on Paltalk, and always just a great guy despite the vast differences in belief. While he didn't hesitate to speak his mind, he showed great respect and fairness to another point of view that was intelligently expressed. He was a great deal of fun. When we started this forum, we wanted to forge REAL relationships between believers and nonbelievers, not phoney or plastic gestures, and Bande was real. He always had something to share on various topics.
I remember one night we were talking, and I told him that I was watching a special on concrete, and I found an interest in the history of concrete. Everything thought I was kidding, but me and bande chatted for long periods of time on the history of Roman concrete. When I told him I was looking for art for my guest bathroom, he introduced me to the art of Waterhouse, and I am very grateful for that. I have a print of the Circe Invidiosa in my bathroom because of Bande. I think he would find it amusing now whenever I go into that bathroom I think of him!
I can still him making jokes about Xena's "leather knickers" and we would argue about that, and he would be saying, "Play the Xena song." I am going to miss him. It truly says something about his endearing qualities that a group of (some would say) fundamentalist Christians were so deeply fond of him and are in great grief at our loss.
I hope this gives some comfort or joy in reading how literally all over the globe, Bande had friends and those that cared for him, accepting him in all his differences from most of us, and he accepting of us in the same way.
November 28th 2006, 08:17 PM
My thoughts and prayers are with Bandecoot's family...
November 28th 2006, 08:31 PM
I always looked forward to talking to Andrew in the Theologyweb chat. We would always talk about history into the early morning (for America, anyway). We might have even played Battlefield 1942 online together, but from some reason the game wouldn't let us connect. He knew me as bogbrush because I used to have long hair and he was convinced I wore my pants too low. I keep praying God brings him to heaven. He was a great guy.
Albany, New York
November 28th 2006, 08:38 PM
I miss him terribly.
November 29th 2006, 12:32 AM
what can I say?
reading through the posts already here brought back the flood of tears. Andrew I wont call him bandecoot he already told me off for that a few weeks ago when he rang...I remember him saying "Kaz your a friend your allowed to call me andrew"
anyway andrew was someone I am going to miss heaps I remember the last paltalk he started talking about how I killed a kangaroo with a stick after he had told me he wouldnt for at least 2 weeks if I came to paltalk. I remember him telling me about how kara had been to a tupper ware party and got a rolling mat thing for free but he was still using the one he bought through me because I had taken the time to buy it and send it and stuff.
I loved his jokes and how he made aussie sheilas out to be these tough creatures that american guys shouldnt tangle with :lol:
I liked the email jokes he forwarded occasionally and how much he cared for people here at tweb...if he hadnt seen someone for a while he would ask about them. It was a priveledge to know Andrew for the last 2 or 3 years and even tho I will miss him lots I am glad I got the chance to know him and talk to him.
kara his freaks will miss him
I am sad I am too far away to be able to get to his funeral I would have liked to have been there.
Love Kaz (western Australia)
November 29th 2006, 12:44 AM
To Andrew's family:
I am glad that I was able to have contact with such a fellow as he. He was a truly erudite man who had the perfect combination to provide remarks that were both jovial and stinging. A man with Andrew's intelligence and his somewhat critical outlook of the world around him is truly hard to find. In a way, he reminded me of my father, just a bit. It hurt me to hear of Andrew's passing for it felt as if I had lost some aspect of my own father all over again.
The way he and I made some contact was actually through his critical teasing. I have a taste of music that he deemed as "garbage." It always brought a smile to my face whenever he would bring up the topic in PalTalk or simply through a random post in a thread. I am saddened because Andrew once expressed his desire to hear what my voice sounded like. I sadly never did speak to him via PalTalk, and I now wish that I had. I am still going through the odd transition of knowing that his screenname will not appear on Tweb any longer.
I just would like to let you know that things will be hard at first, but they will get better. I know this from some personal experience. It is hard to comprehend how all of this happened. You might feel anguish, anger, happiness, sorrow, joy and perhaps even a sense of peace over the loss. It is important to keep perspective in mind, to just remember to take one day at a time.
Andrew's presence will be greatly missed to us all here on TheologyWeb. I shall never forget him.
With My Condolences,
Barbara (Telleriab2) Miami, FL, USA
November 29th 2006, 08:23 AM
Andrew was well liked and respected by people around the world. I believe that the best anyone can do with their life is to leave the world a slightly better place than it was when they arrived. He achieved this comfortably.
My sincerest condolences and best wishes,
Steve, London, UK.
November 29th 2006, 09:08 AM
When something like this happens it is a shock, and we often think first of lost opportunities; and what we could have done.
But let's also think of what did happen, spontaneouly, while Andrew was active in the group. He was elected as the alumnus just last month. Many of us did get the chance to interact with him. His impact here is a testimony to how much people had taken the opportunity even before any of us knew it had such limited availability. And Andrew knew this also; he often spoke with affection -- and with some biting humour as well; this is bandecoot we're talking about after all! -- of the people he knew through this on-line community.
For myself, I'm glad I arranged to meet up with Andrew in person. After I left Brisbane it became a normal part of occasional return visits that I'd give Bandecoot a buzz and see if we could meet up for pool, and beer, and steak. And many of you have done this also; taking the opportunity to meet up on paltalk, or with posts here, and so on.
I trust it is the same with those who knew him best. I only met Kara the once; and that briefly. But I certainly heard about her whenever we met. So even although there are always lost opportunities; there are also opportunities that were taken. And I'm sure Kara had those. I hope the memory will, in time, be gladness and peace, alongside the sorrow.
With concern and sympathy -- Chris Ho-Stuart (aka "Sylas")
November 29th 2006, 10:50 AM
There is a scene in the Monty Python film The Life of Brian that always remimded me of Bandecoot.
In the scene Jesus is giving the Sermon on the mount. The camera starts on Jesus giving the sermon as quoted in the bible. As He preaches, the camera pans away. It sweeps over a multitude listening to the words of Jesus. It comes to rest on a small group just on the outskirts. They are so far away Jesus is a tiny figure, his words almost unintelligable.
The group then begins arguing over the hard to hear words from Jesus, making such mistakes as turning "Blessed are the peacemakers" into "Blessed are the cheesemakers". The argument becomes heated with one man, played by the brilliant Eric Idle, beginning to insult others in the group in his frustration, telling them to listen up because there may be a bit about "Blessed are the Big Noses".
It is a funny scene that reminds me of our dear friend Bandecoot. The man was a combination of intelligence and quick wit. That wit was oft loosened on those he lost patience with for one reason or another. The insult was often quick and quite humorous. Where as Eric Idle quipped about "Blessed are the Big Noses", Bande's quip would have been more like "Blessed are the Gimboids". He would give you your chance to speak, but if you crossed that gimboid line, he would let you know.
I was surprised at how deeply Andrew's passing has effected me. He is a man I never met face to face, yet the sound of his voice ringing forth with acerbic wit will always ring in my ears, especially on the nights we gather in Pal Talk.
Bandecoot...I will remember you always with a smile. I now own a copy of the Oxford. I never finished it. You answered my questions when I had them. I guess I will have to finish it on my own now, but I thank you for making me aware of it. You will be missed here at Tweb. Thank you for brightening our world in your own unique way.
I know you would laugh to be reminded that we will now need another "token" athiest in pal talk. You would laugh. And in remmebering you, so should we. I think that is what you would have wanted.
Rest in Peace.
Brian Delaware, USA
November 29th 2006, 01:46 PM
Bande was one of a kind. I look forward to hearing him talk in PalTalk: He had such a quick wit about him.
I know just as he is missed in our circle, even more so in your circle in real life. My thoughts and prayers go out to you in your time of sorrow. May you be comforted in your grief.
--Talitha AKA Darth Jade
November 29th 2006, 02:02 PM
Sincere condolences to all Bandecoot's family. Rest in peace Bandecoot lad...Tweb will certainly miss your energy.
November 29th 2006, 02:16 PM
To Andrew's Family:
I hope it is an encouragement and comfort for you to see how we were all impacted by him. For me personally, he was a sort of mentor. He was one of the few I trusted to give an intelligent, truthful answer to my questions. And, he was always patient with my ignorance, telling me often that it was his duty as an educator to help me in these matters. He was a friend I wish I knew better. I hope that I am not over stepping my bounds by saying his loss is always on my mind. I wish that there were something more I could do for you during this time. But, all I can offer are my prayers and thoughts, in hope that you may be consoled.
God bless you and take care of you,
November 29th 2006, 02:30 PM
may you find comfort in this difficult time, and know that bande was loved and cherished. you're in our thoughts; you're in our prayers.
November 29th 2006, 04:04 PM
To Andrewís family:
When I first started on Tweb, Andrew took the time to send a personal email giving me some tips about how things work here. I thought that was so nice. Ever since then, I always felt comforted by his presence. He canít be replaced.
He was a thoughtful, caring, and very intelligent person, and thatís just about the highest praise you can give someone.
November 29th 2006, 04:32 PM
Andrew was one of the nicest, funnest, and kindest guys I've ever met on the internet. You were lucky to know him in person, and we are all praying for you. Robert
C. D. Ward
November 29th 2006, 05:07 PM
The World Wide Web is an amazing phenomena. Through it you get to meet and interact with hundreds of people from all around the world in a manner impossible before its invention. Truly an amazing opportunity to get to know individuals from all sorts of different cultures and walks of life.
But there's sort of a downside to this as well. You're also indelibly affected by these people in so many ways. Many of them to the point where their loss impacts you deeply. So it is here at TheologyWeb with our dear friend Andrew. He has left an impression on the hearts and minds of hundreds of people all around the world; an impression that cannot be erased even by his death.
Two families grieve for him, both his family in "real life" and the virtual family here at TWeb, but two families will also celebrate his life and carry on his memory. He will be missed, but he will also be remembered.
Thank you, Bandecoot, for sharing yourself with us while you were here. To Kara and his RL family: you are in our thoughts and prayers...
November 29th 2006, 05:37 PM
I've been a member of Tweb and I've visited Paltalk almost every weekend for more than a year now. Bande was almost always there. I'm not sure how close we were exactly, but I remember he was always there to answer my questions about tea and cooking and stuff. If it wasn't for his constantly asking me about my progress, I might never have gotten around to baking bread for the first time. It was good bread, by the way. I'm also another of the guys he invited to play Battlefield 1942 with him, but I didn't have the game so couldn't. I had the chance to get it once, but I didn't, and now I wish I had.
I'm not sure where I'm going with this anymore. I guess it's that now that I've had some time to really think about it, he was more important to me than I realized. But like it sometimes is with people who are always there, it's so easy to just take them for granted. I was kind of numb when I heard the news last Thursday, but the reality of the situation didn't really start to hit me until Monday. Rambling again, right. I guess I'll wrap things up. I'm really sorry for your loss, and like everyone's said, he will be missed. A lot.
Derek (Little Shepherd) Warner Robins, GA
November 29th 2006, 07:14 PM
Hi, I used to talk to Andrew fairly regularly on the internet... I really liked him and I had plans to get to know him better. I'm very sorry for your loss.
November 29th 2006, 08:59 PM
I was lucky enough to interact with Andrew while I've been here at TWeb and on Pal Talk.
The first time I ever went into the Pal Talk room, Andrew greeted me as "Ice Ice Baby". Every time I entered the room, that is how he'd greet me. I'll miss his special greetings.
Andrew liked to pick on me for some reason. The last time he picked on me, he teased me about arranging my marriage to a single guy here on TWeb.
He didn't know it but, if I ever get married, I was going to invite him and Kara.
My heart will never be complete again because I've lost a dear friend. I've never met Andrew in real life but I am so glad to have had the chance to know him.
The world is missing one of the most loving and beautiful men that God could have put here on Earth.
My heart and thoughts are with you always.
My deepest sympathy,
November 29th 2006, 10:19 PM
I don't feel as if there's much I can add to what's already been said. I didn't have as much to do with Andrew as some here, but I interacted with him enough on TWeb and Paltalk to appreciate his quick wit and good-natured humour. I regret not having had the chance to meet him in person, but I was glad to have known him even online. He was a top bloke.
One Bad Pig
November 29th 2006, 10:24 PM
Thank you so much for sharing Andrew with us. Many times we'd hear you in the background on Paltalk, conquering the world with the help of Garth Brooks while Andrew spoke on the mic about this or that. He and I shared a common bond through our military experience, and we shared a passion for history and cats as well. In fact, my current avatar on Tweb is a picture of a kitten he forwarded on from you just a couple weeks ago. I'm gonna keep it up a while to remember him by.
Luke, Washington DC, USA
November 30th 2006, 12:22 AM
Dear Bandecoot/Andrew's Family
I am sorry for your loss. I don't know how anyone who knew him in anyway could help but miss him. He was one of my favorite people on Paltalk and on Theologyweb, wish I could have gotten to know him better. I have a number of memories of Andrew (he was encouraging the night before I was to take a foodhandler's test, discussing a dislike of Mesoamerican history, discussing education in Australia, he came up with the screen name Molly Millions for me, I joined a somewhat more rabid theology board that was why he found a way to post there again, etc.). He was a good man. He will be missed and remembered with love.
God bless you
Anastasia (aka Molly Millions, aka Joan of Arc, aka Kira)
November 30th 2006, 01:48 AM
Whenever we forget that there are real people out there in cyberspace...
God be with you.
November 30th 2006, 02:02 AM
Like Luke I thank you for sharing Andrew with us. I shall miss his tenor singing "Won't you stay a little bit longer," when I tried to sign off on my self imposed curfew, and our mutual love of cats. I never believed him when he said he was not a nice man. There were times when I was feeling down and he knew it he'd give me a zen hug to cheer me up. And knowing I loved looking at natural beauty he found a beatiful picture of a solar eclipse which is now my desktop wallpaper, every time I look at it I shall treasure the memory of a man who's sometimes caustic wit hid a beautiful soul.
My prayers are with you in this loss.
Northern CA, USA
November 30th 2006, 03:49 AM
When I started reading the thread about shutting the forums down for a day in memory of Bande I laughed because it's just the sort of extended humor I'd expect the Tweb staff to engage in with a very much alive and playfully acerbic Bandecoot.
Then I realized it was serious and yeah...I'm shocked. Tweb Paltalk was improved two or three times over by his presence in the room. Thanks Tweb staff for handling this in such a respectful manner.
November 30th 2006, 04:41 AM
I am deeply shocked to hear the sad news. Although I never met Andrew in person, I regarded him as a friend, and I think he returned the feeling. The world is a sadder place without him and we all feel a loss.
My heartfelt condolences go to his family.
November 30th 2006, 08:32 AM
A hello and a warm hug to Andrew/Bandecoot's family.
Because I'm newer here, I never had the opportunity to talk to Andrew. But I can tell you from the bottom of my heart that every day I see the messages from people who knew Andrew, I'm touched deeply. He was incredibly, incredibly loved and looked up to here, and I know you yourself have so many precious memories of him. My thoughts are with you and your family. Thank you for sharing Bande with my fellow posters. He enriched more people's lives than I could ever know. :hug:
November 30th 2006, 08:44 AM
I never met Andrew, but he still had a beneficial impact, as I know he did on others.
He will be missed.
November 30th 2006, 11:29 AM
Hello Kara and family,
I did not interact a great deal with your beloved, being a fellow atheist we usually agreed and did not debate much. I did enjoy reading what he had to say. He was intelligent, honest, and kind. He will be missed at Theology Web and I wish I could've met him in person. I cannot imagine the pain you are experiencing at this time, and my thoughts are with you.
Heather (Illinois, USA)
December 2nd 2006, 05:06 PM
Sadly I was unable to take the opportunity to contribute to this thread before Tweb shut for the day at the end of Thursday, but Kara, and Andrew's family were in my thoughts yesterday. I too shall miss Bande very much when we are on Paltalk, for his kindness and fun and humour. My first visit to the Tweb Paltalk room coincided with him talking on the mike, and he immediately welcomed me, before carrying on, and the same happened the second time I visited, drawing me into the Paltalk group, for which kindness I was always grateful. There is going to be a feeling that the group just isn't complete from now on, we shall miss Andrew very much. He had been looking forward to coming back to the UK and I am sure that at some point we would have been able to meet up, and shared a cup of Yorkshire tea. Kara, I do hope that knowing how much Andrew meant to us all here is a comfort to you, and I pray that you might know the Lord's comfort too.
God bless you,
December 31st 2006, 07:24 PM
Kara - I am so very sorry.
I have just heard the news a few minutes ago.
I used to talk to Andrew. I used the name RaggedyAnnie1 in chat. Like Andrew, I usually disagreed with what was discussed in the chat room.
He would recommend some good Australian wines to me. I liked his perspectives.
I haven't been online much. When I'd peek in, and he wasn't online, I wasn't so interested to pop into the chatroom. I am so terribly sorry to realize why that was now.
God bless you Kara, in your grief and in your memories.
December 31st 2006, 10:34 PM
Ah, I'm late as usual. I was shocked to hear that Bandecoot had passed from us and from you. Your loss is real while ours (mostly) only virtual but we mourn with you, we will miss his wit and charm and his typically Aussie sense of humour.
May there be moments of support and love in your sorrow, may you be aware of the love and support of folk you have never met & from this Kiwi to you, May the Wise Lord bless you in your sorrow and support you as you travel on.
Naku noha, na
Anglican Church International
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