Phobias

[Dee Dee Warren]

I have some deep seated phobias, and it seems as I get older they get worse. That isn't really what the post is about though, and I ask for Christian or Christian-friendly only responses.

I was listening to Adrian Rodgers today and he had a sermon about fears and phobias. And I dunno, it just left me feeling guilty and condemned. He in no way intended that, but its not just so easy as saying to kick fear out of your life. Also I was speaking to someone today about my phobia of airplanes, and he was like "so what happened to you that made you have this fear"

It isn't like that. :argh: Nothing bad has EVER happened to me on an airplane, and when I was younger I traveled with my mother to visit relatives up north regularly. But as far back as I can remember I had been terrified of flying.

Once a pastor at a church I used to attend also preached about those who are cowardly and he talked about his fear of flying and preached in Revelation where it said the cowardly are one of the sins condemned. Again, I just felt condemned.

Isn't it possible in a fallen world that it isn't that phobic persons WANT to have phobias. Heck, if I would fly I could visit friends more often. Just as physical ailments are not promised healing, why is it that emotinal ailments are treated so differently?

After that sermon, I really and truly prayed long and hard about my phobia of flying. I even determined that I was going to do it, but even thinking about it makes me panic. There are plenty of things I am "afraid of" that I stand up to. I am not a coward, I have done plenty of things in great fear and trembling, but true phobias aren't like that. They are not a choice, and they are not rational. In fact being open and transparent about my phobias and battles iwth depression have taken courage as they can be used against me, to dismiss what I have to say. I don't care anymore - there are too many people living in guilt and shame.

Anyways, thoughts? Please no condemnation, I hear enough of that already.

[technomage]

Isn't it possible in a fallen world that it isn't that phobic persons WANT to have phobias. Heck, if I would fly I could visit friends more often. Just as physical ailments are not promised healing, why is it that emotinal ailments are treated so differently?

Dee Dee, the reason why emotional illnesses are treated differently is not because phobias are "wrong" or "sinful" (they aren't) but because all too often as human beings, we don't understand why they happen. And it's not always just emotional illnesses--look at Word of Faith doctrines, that blame those who are physically ill for their illness, stating that they "don't have enough faith" or some such drivel.

Dear friend, in as much as you can, do not let stuff like this get to you. Yes, phobias, depression, and anxiety (all of which I deal with) are just as much physical illnesses as diabetes or a broken leg. Please do not allow well-intentioned but still ignorant people who do not understand that to get to you.

[Dee Dee Warren]

It really got me thinking today though when the co-worker asked what had happened for me to have this phobia. A lot of people just don't get it. There are things that have happened to me that makes me scared of something, for instance I have been in car accidents so when I see someone driving recklessly towards me I get scared, but not phobic. I drive often, in fact that is my substitute for flying.

I always just blame it on my mom smoking while she was prenant (they didn't know any better then)

[technomage]

It really got me thinking today though when the co-worker asked what had happened for me to have this phobia. A lot of people just don't get it. There are things that have happened to me that makes me scared of something, for instance I have been in car accidents so when I see someone driving recklessly towards me I get scared, but not phobic. I drive often, in fact that is my substitute for flying.

I always just blame it on my mom smoking while she was prenant (they didn't know any better then)

*nods* In my case, I'm phobic about heights. I've never fallen from a height, never been traumatized about heights. Heck, I used to work rigging lights at Founder's Memorial Auditorium at Bob Jones ... 150 feet above the floor. But lately, I can't get on my house roof without some severe panic.

Phobias are no more rational than depression--which means you can't just "snap yourself out of it," any more than you can for depression. And anyone who tells you that you can just doesn not know the facts.

:hug:

[themuzicman]

The subconscious portion of the human brain is a funny thing. It's neither rational nor subject to rational processes.

I have a fear of heights. I've "confronted" my fear many times, and I've learned to be comfortable with it, but it never goes away.

In my hometown, there are several places where there are metal walk bridges that go over a wide (5-lane) street. They are high enough that even taller semi-trucks don't even come close. For me... terrifying. However, in "confronting" my phobia, I endeavored to cross one. I got about half way, and almost froze. It took everything that I had to push myself the rest of the way, and I haven't done that again since.

I also think it's a result of being fallen humans. I don't think you really get over it. If you can face it, you might be able to learn to live with it in limited circumstances.

But I would certainly understand if you could not.

And shame on any preacher who condemns phobias. It's needless condemnation.

Michael

[$cirisme]

I have a few fears, especially heights, though I have more or less conquered it. Still sorry for what you're going thru. :hug:

[Teallaura]

Phobia is irrational by definition - I don't see anything in Scripture that requires us to be rational when we cannot. When Scripture speaks of not fearing the presumption seems apparent that it means insomuchas one is capable. Scripture nowhere requires that which we are genuinely incapable of.

Not a justificatin for not trying to overcome whatever phobia we might have - but like depression it is not a failing.

[Philosophickle]

I am absolutely terrified of spiders.
And ever since I saw Night of the Living Dead when I was 6 (!), zombies have both scared and intrigued me.

[Dave G]

Dee Dee, I'll email you...
I don't want to post this for public perusal.

[Dee Dee Warren]

I don't like spiders, but I am not phobic of them. My phobias have taught me to laugh at myself.

[ApologiaPhoenix]

DDW. You know I have a phobia as well and one in particular that kind of plays havoc in my life.

My best advice is to not condemn. Instead, it's to allow others to be supportive in that time. You also know that it's been the TWeb family that has pushed me to be strong and overcome my phobia.

So what do you do with a phobia? Pray of course. I'd also suggest talking to your family and I don't necessarily mean biological.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Oh I talk about my phobias quite often. Pretty much anyone on Paltalk knows all of them.

[Ishmael]

im afraid of the ghetto bird myself,,, he's like "arrraw, arraw, arraw!!"

[Pitchforkpat]

And I dunno, it just left me feeling guilty and condemned.
Guilty? Condemned? Uh uh. Remember it wasn’t that long ago that phobias, anxiety, and depression were little understood and even less talked about. Just dealing with this and pushing through is courageous. Actually being able to openly talk about it in an informed and articulate way is brilliant. I’m sure the sermon was well meant, but I doubt many preachers have the time to thoroughly research such complex matters.

Some years ago I started to get panic attacks. Even my doctor was clueless. I went to the library and got a couple of books on the matter and somehow understanding the physiology cured me (I still have other fears like heights). As far as my reading went, people who suffer from phobias and anxiety are almost always highly intelligent and very far from weak. Society’s slowly catching on but it will take more bravery and insight from people like you for some time to come.

[Ishmael]

no really, ever since coming home from Iraq I freak around helecopters

[Dee Dee Warren]

I don't think the pastors meant to condemn, but sometimes I feel like you said, it isn't always entirely understood. If someone doesn't have a phobia, it is hard to understand, and I think people use the word phobia to refer to things that are not exactly phobias. Phobias are extreme and totally irrational fear. If I even contemplate flying, I get physically ill to the point where if I continue to think about it, I could vomit. And then whenever I see anything that reinforces the phobia, it gets worse. For instance, watching doumentaries on plane crashes and stuff.

[Pitchforkpat]

Right and when people mention "heights" I don't think it quite qualifies. I think a real phobia is something that interferes with your life in a significant way. Most people have no idea just how debilitating phobias can be.

[moose7237]

I have some deep seated phobias, and it seems as I get older they get worse. That isn't really what the post is about though, and I ask for Christian or Christian-friendly only responses.

I was listening to Adrian Rodgers today and he had a sermon about fears and phobias. And I dunno, it just left me feeling guilty and condemned. He in no way intended that, but its not just so easy as saying to kick fear out of your life. Also I was speaking to someone today about my phobia of airplanes, and he was like "so what happened to you that made you have this fear"

It isn't like that. :argh: Nothing bad has EVER happened to me on an airplane, and when I was younger I traveled with my mother to visit relatives up north regularly. But as far back as I can remember I had been terrified of flying.

Once a pastor at a church I used to attend also preached about those who are cowardly and he talked about his fear of flying and preached in Revelation where it said the cowardly are one of the sins condemned. Again, I just felt condemned.

Isn't it possible in a fallen world that it isn't that phobic persons WANT to have phobias. Heck, if I would fly I could visit friends more often. Just as physical ailments are not promised healing, why is it that emotinal ailments are treated so differently?

After that sermon, I really and truly prayed long and hard about my phobia of flying. I even determined that I was going to do it, but even thinking about it makes me panic. There are plenty of things I am "afraid of" that I stand up to. I am not a coward, I have done plenty of things in great fear and trembling, but true phobias aren't like that. They are not a choice, and they are not rational. In fact being open and transparent about my phobias and battles iwth depression have taken courage as they can be used against me, to dismiss what I have to say. I don't care anymore - there are too many people living in guilt and shame.

Anyways, thoughts? Please no condemnation, I hear enough of that already.


Hello and Peace be to you friend,

I am not a christian but I will try to give you some advice and hopefully it can help out.

I have never been on a plane to tell you the truth. but the way I sometimes look at life is that, we are limited on earth. We all get sick, we all go through different moods, we are all surounded by corruption and sin. Sometimes I look at something sinful and wonder, "I wish I could do that" I can, its not like God will throw a lightning bolt at me, I mean it could happen. But I fear the wrath of God like I am going to anger him. So I try the best I can to please him, and sometimes I wonder, when will this life be over, and hopefully if God wills it, I can enjoy paradise. Its like you can't wait for this life to be over. I guess what I'm trying to say is, the only fear you should have, is fearing God. I mean its even written in the OT to fear God, but why? Because it inclines you to do good. No matter what, we will all die, and I'm sure for some that time will be fearful and for others it means finally being free of the corruption of this life. So I say, don't worry about anything else, whether its animals, heights, or flying. Because if you know deep down in your heart, that you have spent your life trying to please him and you are repentful, then death shouldn't be so bad for you. I hope this helps, again, I truly do not know what you are going through because I have never really been on a jet liner. You could just avoid flying all together, but just know fear God and when the time of death approaches get to the stage where you will be happy to accept death.

"They say death smiles at a man, and all a man could do is smile back" From Gladiatior.

Usually phobias relate to the fear of death. So I hope this helps, if it doesn't pm me and tell me I'm a klutz or something :)

[Dee Dee Warren]

That is so true. My flying phobia comes up quite frequently because my job requires travel. But I have to drive to wherever we have to go. And there is a thing with certain kinds of bridges such that I have hard time driving on them. I can do it if I don't know about it ahead of time, or can force myself through it, but there is a bridge in Tampa that I am absolutely terrified of, that when I have to go there for work, someone else has to go with to drive over it. I can't do it.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Hello and Peace be to you friend,

I am not a christian but I will try to give you some advice and hopefully it can help out.

I have never been on a plane to tell you the truth. but the way I sometimes look at life is that, we are limited on earth. We all get sick, we all go through different moods, we are all surounded by corruption and sin. Sometimes I look at something sinful and wonder, "I wish I could do that" I can, its not like God will throw a lightning bolt at me, I mean it could happen. But I fear the wrath of God like I am going to anger him. So I try the best I can to please him, and sometimes I wonder, when will this life be over, and hopefully if God wills it, I can enjoy paradise. Its like you can't wait for this life to be over. I guess what I'm trying to say is, the only fear you should have, is fearing God. I mean its even written in the OT to fear God, but why? Because it inclines you to do good. No matter what, we will all die, and I'm sure for some that time will be fearful and for others it means finally being free of the corruption of this life. So I say, don't worry about anything else, whether its animals, heights, or flying. Because if you know deep down in your heart, that you have spent your life trying to please him and you are repentful, then death shouldn't be so bad for you. I hope this helps, again, I truly do not know what you are going through because I have never really been on a jet liner. You could just avoid flying all together, but just know fear God and when the time of death approaches get to the stage where you will be happy to accept death.

"They say death smiles at a man, and all a man could do is smile back" From Gladiatior.

Usually phobias relate to the fear of death. So I hope this helps, if it doesn't pm me and tell me I'm a klutz or something :)

I think that is an element of it, but not totally. Perhaps fear of a horrible death? Because death in general is something I am at peace with in most ways due to my faith. But plummeting out of the sky isn't a good way to go. But it isn't even just that. I have a hard time even driving through airports or anything to do with planes. The whole thing creeps me out very badly.

And I don't mind nonChristians participating as long as they are friendly and understand that I am coming at this from within a Christian context.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Here is the bridge in Tampa I can't drive over. I am getting very nervous just with the picture, seriously.

[technomage]

Yikes! I don't blame you!

Is there another route into Tampa that avoids the bridge?

[Kelp]

Dee Dee, I believe that that pastor got the wrong verse from Revelation. A more appropriate on would be, "And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away." [Revelation 21:4]
I wish that I could say something that doesn't sound hollow, but I cannot even imagine what you are going throgh. All I can say is that this too shall definitely pass. That there will come a time when all things will be new. If you have been as honest with God as you know how and have asked Him for help, I know that you will not be condemned. A phobia is a disease of the body and is not promised healing in this life. But, like every aspect of this fleshly tent, it will be transformed into everlasting peace and glory at our marvelous Resurection.
I hope that this helps and I want you to know that I am praying for you.
If you evrer nedd my help with anything, you kno where to find me.

In Christ,
Nick

[Dee Dee Warren]

Hi Kelp, I don't have my Bible handy, but it was the verse that something like the cowardly, the unbelieving, liars, will have their place in the lake of fire or something like that.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Yikes! I don't blame you!

Is there another route into Tampa that avoids the bridge?

Isn't it horrible? Technically it is into St. Petersburg, I use Tampa when speaking to people from all over since it is a more well known name. It crosses Tampa Bay, and no I don't think there is any other way.

It is truly a horrible bridge.

[Kelp]

Hi Kelp, I don't have my Bible handy, but it was the verse that something like the cowardly, the unbelieving, liars, will have their place in the lake of fire or something like that.
Yeah, that's Revelation 21:8. The fact is, you essentially have a disease, not of the soul, but of the brain chemicals. It is a rough anology, but I really do not see God condemning you for having a debilitating fear that you cannot control anymore than he would a child who was born brain dead and could not repent and trust Him for slvation.

Now, certainly you've tried to get rid of this fear and you have even taken measures to work past it on occasion. You are obviouslt not a coward simply giving into and indullging fear you are someone who strives mightily to conquer here problem. God does not send people to Hell for being sick.

[Xorex]

I have had a phobia about getting blood drawn since I was a small child. Every time I went to get blood drawn I would faint and everyone made a huge fuss, it was scary and afterwards I felt like crap because I'd be weak and sometimes injured myself from falling.

I can remember having to get blood drawn as a child and waiting in the queue utterly terrified. As time went on it wasn't the prick of the needle I feared anymore but the fainting.

As I got older I tried to meet it head on and thought I had conquered it. Then one day I went to get my blood drawn, sat down and the next thing I knew I was lying on the floor looking up at several faces through the faint fog. The phobia has extended a bit to medical tests and doctors in general which has led to my avoiding them.

I have learned to treat it as part of my life now. I go into the lab and explain that I'm a fainter and allow the staff to take care of me. The last nurse who drew my blood had me lie down, put a pillow under my legs, placed a fan in front of me to give me some air and got me a drink of juice after it was over. I remain calm and do not resist the needle at all and am a model patient. It has helped a great deal. I prayed before my last round of tests and that helped me a think - to trust in God and I believe God was with me in the kindly staff and the people who supported me.

Phobias are irrational and are very difficult to overcome. I don't think I'll every be free of my needle phobia but I have decided to no longer be embarassed or "try to tought it out alone'. I need all the support I can get when facing a phobia. I hope you have or are able to find the support you need too.

God Bless.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Yeah MJ, I am very open about these kinds of things. I went through up to adulthood hiding many of my issues and it wasn't until the Internet that I was really able to research and learn that I wasn't the only person who certain issues. I have mild OCD (was much worse when I was a child) that contributes. It was a great relief to read stories and articles by people describing exactly what I have gone through. I am not lying to say that one night I just sat at the computer screen crying at the stuff I found, not in sadness, but in astonishment at how not alone I was.

[lao tzu]

Aw shucks, Dee Dee,

{{{{Dee Dee}}}}

I'm really sorry to hear about this. I can't say I share your problem. As far as I know I have no real fears. If anything, my problems tend toward adrenaline addiction. When I find myself at a great height, my first thought is whether it would make for a good base jump. I know it's dangerous, but I can't help myself.

But in its own way, it goes to the same point. Your phobias are no more a sign of lack of faith than my lack of phobias are a sign of being right with god, if you can follow my logic.

The first thing to do when you're dealing with a physical infirmity is to treat it like a medical condition. Feeling guilt about an illness is counterproductive. There are things we can tough out, and other things that need treatment. I believe phobias are a real illness. I'm sure there are medical professionals who know how to treat them.

And I hope, for your sake, that you'll seek them out.

As ever, Jesse

[Gromit45]

The following is just my own thoughts and ideas. I am not trying to give a definitive answer:


Sometimes I see phobias as akin to certain addictions. The body has a certain physical response to both. The psychological aspect of addiction is often much harder to break than the physical. Phobias are heavily grounded in psychological but they certainly have physical aspects. (Dizziness near heights, etc.)

Often accountability is a key ingredient for getting free from addictions. I wonder if accountablity would be helpful with phobias. This is an off-the-cuff idea, but some people do get past phobias just like they get past addictions. Perhaps a gentle hand can guide some away from phobias. Just like with addictions, don't expect 100% success.

[Abigail]

I think there is also a verse in Hebrews about people being cowardly and shrinking back. I know exactly where you are coming from DDW as I have a few phobias myself and there are things I just cannot do because I panic and start to become physically sick...as in vomiting and getting light-headed and fainting. I know how you feel when you say you feel condemned by those verses...I feel the same.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Abigail, thank you for sharing that. The panic you described is exactly what I get even if I think too long about flying. Flying is the worst phobia I have. The others, if I get enough willpower, I can handle for limited durations.

[Dee Dee Warren]

The following is just my own thoughts and ideas. I am not trying to give a definitive answer:


Sometimes I see phobias as akin to certain addictions. The body has a certain physical response to both. The psychological aspect of addiction is often much harder to break than the physical. Phobias are heavily grounded in psychological but they certainly have physical aspects. (Dizziness near heights, etc.)

Often accountability is a key ingredient for getting free from addictions. I wonder if accountablity would be helpful with phobias. This is an off-the-cuff idea, but some people do get past phobias just like they get past addictions. Perhaps a gentle hand can guide some away from phobias. Just like with addictions, don't expect 100% success.

I agree there is some aspect to that, one reason why I am pretty open about this issue. Things that are kept in the dark tend to fester.

[Keumkang]

Firstly, the preacher you mentioned is full of it. Sorry(no I'm not), but it takes a good heaping of ignorance to write off the intense anxiety (sometimes agony) a person goes through, just because the preacher himself doesn't have to deal with it. :glare:

I've one very infrequent, but intense phobia: tight spaces. This one I can trace back to my brothers and I playing games of tieing each other up in rope, a sleeping bag, or (the scarring one) a pillow case. It hardly ever comes up, but did just recently when I had to crawl through the attic at my parents' house to do some wiring. I found myself prone, arms outstretched in front of me, and unable to move them down, or to back out of the tight corner I was in. My immediate thought was the feasibility of literally breaking through the roof above me or the ceiling below me. I recited the Creed and quietly mumbled/sang "It Is Well With My Soul" and used what will power was available to remain mostly nonviolent, if not calm.

Dee Dee, I know very well that bridge in St. Petersburg--it's maybe 15 minutes from home. I take it once-a- week to once-a-month, to visit friends. A few times when driving a friend over it, they choose to close their eyes the entire time, it's that scary for them, though I don't mind it myself. Whatever rattles your cage, please know that it says nothing about your mettle, much less your obedience or faithfulness to God. Nothing at all.

[Kelp]

[QUOTE=Abigail]I think there is also a verse in Hebrews about people being cowardly and shrinking back.[QUOTE]Yes, that's Hebrews 10:29, "But we are not of those who shrink back to destruction, but of those who have faith to the preserving of the soul."[NASB]

But, it is in the context of discipleship and personal holiness. Hardly applicable to someone with a phobia that they have tried to get rid off.

[semmie'ssister]

I have some deep seated phobias, and it seems as I get older they get worse. That isn't really what the post is about though, and I ask for Christian or Christian-friendly only responses.

I was listening to Adrian Rodgers today and he had a sermon about fears and phobias. And I dunno, it just left me feeling guilty and condemned. He in no way intended that, but its not just so easy as saying to kick fear out of your life. Also I was speaking to someone today about my phobia of airplanes, and he was like "so what happened to you that made you have this fear"

It isn't like that. :argh: Nothing bad has EVER happened to me on an airplane, and when I was younger I traveled with my mother to visit relatives up north regularly. But as far back as I can remember I had been terrified of flying.

Once a pastor at a church I used to attend also preached about those who are cowardly and he talked about his fear of flying and preached in Revelation where it said the cowardly are one of the sins condemned. Again, I just felt condemned.

Isn't it possible in a fallen world that it isn't that phobic persons WANT to have phobias. Heck, if I would fly I could visit friends more often. Just as physical ailments are not promised healing, why is it that emotinal ailments are treated so differently?

After that sermon, I really and truly prayed long and hard about my phobia of flying. I even determined that I was going to do it, but even thinking about it makes me panic. There are plenty of things I am "afraid of" that I stand up to. I am not a coward, I have done plenty of things in great fear and trembling, but true phobias aren't like that. They are not a choice, and they are not rational. In fact being open and transparent about my phobias and battles iwth depression have taken courage as they can be used against me, to dismiss what I have to say. I don't care anymore - there are too many people living in guilt and shame.

Anyways, thoughts? Please no condemnation, I hear enough of that already.

I can't see how having a phobia is wrong or sinful. I have a phobia of water. but what's funny about it is that I really do like to swim, and I would swim more if I wasn't so terrified of being completed submerged in the water.

when I was a little girl, i remember getting tangled in some long grass in the water, and not being able to free myself and almost drowned.

I was little, so I guess my fearless inner child attitude allowed me to get over it. but a few years later, I was in a pool with ome friends, and another child got on top of me and I wasn't able to get free, and I could not get to the surface....I almost dronwed again.

as I continued to grow up, I was fine playing in calm water, but compltely gave up swimming, and wouldn't go into any water unless i could see the bottom and keep my head above the water.

well, I had to face my fear of water when I got to high shcool, becasue in order to graduate, I had to pass a swim test. :doh: it took my all four years of high school to pass that swim test. and even then, I would panic and freak out in the shalow end of the pool.

but teh swim instructor was very good, and worked with me, and I got through it. oh, I can swim, but I still have a very real phobia of the water and drownding. I can't even stand to watch shows with people drownding, or being trapped under water.

but i try not to let the phobia control me. when it's time fo rme to go back to the pool for requalification, I'm completely upfront with the instructor, I let them know I'm prone to panic attacks in the water, and at i am fully capable of doing all the requirements, and it usully takes me 3-4 times as long as others to get through the training, but I get through it, somehow.

I guess it's all part of facing your fears.

so I just wanted to share that little story. not sure if it helps with the discussion here or not.

[Smokering]

Ahh, phobias.

You know, there are times I envy people with 'normal' phobias like heights, tight spaces or the dark. People get that. Maybe they just make more sense to the average person, because they can be easily related (whether or not they do) to danger and death.

So here's the kicker--whales. Terrified of them, always have been. Isn't that weird? I'm not afraid of them as dangerous animals; I can appreciate, in that tiny logical part of my mind, that they are beautiful and graceful aspects of God's creation. But I can't stand seeing a cartoon pic of them on a T-shirt without getting a thudding shock and becoming all sweaty. Even typing the word right now is kinda creepy--seeing it on a page. Now *there's* a phobia.

I think I can remember the first really creepy moment I had; it may not have been the origin of the phobia. It was watching a scene in Free Willy, when the boy first sees in a lightning flash the whale in the underwater tank, and screams. So did I. And from that day till this, I still have nightmares about that scene.

Now, as phobias go you'd think it would be a fairly convenient one to have--one isn't confronted with whales as often as say, spiders or lifts. But not being based on rationality, it has rather odd side effects. There are shops I can't go into, because of postcards. I hate walking by shops which have big windows at night, because they remind me of the dark viewing tank. When I owned a TV, I used to fear flipping the channels alone in case I came across a National Geographic documentary with scary underwater scenes. (That happened a couple of times over the years, and yikes). I stayed overnight with a friend for years, and was secretly scared because she was into dolphins and had a big seascape photo on her wall. (Yes, the phobia extends to include underwater shots of any kind, dolphins, whales, very big ships and loomy things in general). I love the water, but I get very nervous about any body of water bigger than a puddle, and when swimming I get panic attacks if I put my head under water. I'm a rotten swimmer, which isn't too surprising, but I bet none of those swimming teachers had a clue why I wouldn't float on my back. And... I'm probably the only New Zealander who hasn't seen Whale Rider!

I also have a few sub-phobias, some of which have faded or strengthened over the years. I used to be terrified of corpses, and the idea of finding a corpse. I'm not so ghouled-out by that nowadays, but I do have a possibly-related phobia about stuffed animals. The taxidermy kind I mean, not teddy bears... I get my husband to check out antique shops for me to make sure they don't have a moosehead on the wall, and I can't eat in my grandmother's favourite restaurant because of some moth-eaten deerlike beast lurking above the salads. It makes more sense than the whale thing for me, because the idea of stuffing dead animals is a truly macabre and grotesque idea. I mean, really. Whose wife was the first to put up with that on the living room wall?

And lest my weirdness not be attributed to the evils of my family, my mother gets panic attacks over the song 'Killing Me Softly' for no reason she can adequately name, and my little sister used to be terrified of rubber bands going ping.

Anyone equating phobias with cowardice is of the same ignorant ilk who would associate clinical depression with 'having a sulk', and should be spurned or enlightened accordingly. Darth Xena, the sympathies of a fellow loon are with you. ;)

[semmie'ssister]

Ahh, phobias.

You know, there are times I envy people with 'normal' phobias like heights, tight spaces or the dark. People get that. Maybe they just make more sense to the average person, because they can be easily related (whether or not they do) to danger and death.

So here's the kicker--whales. Terrified of them, always have been. Isn't that weird? I'm not afraid of them as dangerous animals; I can appreciate, in that tiny logical part of my mind, that they are beautiful and graceful aspects of God's creation. But I can't stand seeing a cartoon pic of them on a T-shirt without getting a thudding shock and becoming all sweaty. Even typing the word right now is kinda creepy--seeing it on a page. Now *there's* a phobia.

I think I can remember the first really creepy moment I had; it may not have been the origin of the phobia. It was watching a scene in Free Willy, when the boy first sees in a lightning flash the whale in the underwater tank, and screams. So did I. And from that day till this, I still have nightmares about that scene.

Now, as phobias go you'd think it would be a fairly convenient one to have--one isn't confronted with whales as often as say, spiders or lifts. But not being based on rationality, it has rather odd side effects. There are shops I can't go into, because of postcards. I hate walking by shops which have big windows at night, because they remind me of the dark viewing tank. When I owned a TV, I used to fear flipping the channels alone in case I came across a National Geographic documentary with scary underwater scenes. (That happened a couple of times over the years, and yikes). I stayed overnight with a friend for years, and was secretly scared because she was into dolphins and had a big seascape photo on her wall. (Yes, the phobia extends to include underwater shots of any kind, dolphins, whales, very big ships and loomy things in general). I love the water, but I get very nervous about any body of water bigger than a puddle, and when swimming I get panic attacks if I put my head under water. I'm a rotten swimmer, which isn't too surprising, but I bet none of those swimming teachers had a clue why I wouldn't float on my back. And... I'm probably the only New Zealander who hasn't seen Whale Rider!

I also have a few sub-phobias, some of which have faded or strengthened over the years. I used to be terrified of corpses, and the idea of finding a corpse. I'm not so ghouled-out by that nowadays, but I do have a possibly-related phobia about stuffed animals. The taxidermy kind I mean, not teddy bears... I get my husband to check out antique shops for me to make sure they don't have a moosehead on the wall, and I can't eat in my grandmother's favourite restaurant because of some moth-eaten deerlike beast lurking above the salads. It makes more sense than the whale thing for me, because the idea of stuffing dead animals is a truly macabre and grotesque idea. I mean, really. Whose wife was the first to put up with that on the living room wall?

And lest my weirdness not be attributed to the evils of my family, my mother gets panic attacks over the song 'Killing Me Softly' for no reason she can adequately name, and my little sister used to be terrified of rubber bands going ping.

Anyone equating phobias with cowardice is of the same ignorant ilk who would associate clinical depression with 'having a sulk', and should be spurned or enlightened accordingly. Darth Xena, the sympathies of a fellow loon are with you. ;)

whales, huh....and other marine life in general? I've not heard that one .

I had a friend once that was, (not sure how well of a driver she is now adays, becasue i've not driven with her in over 10 years) but she failed drivers ed twice, adn then her actual driving test three times, and I rememebr one time she was driving adn we were going somewhere, adn she hit (ran over) a squirel, so it made a small thud-thud as it went undr teh front tire and then teh back tire, and from that day forward anytime she hit a bump of anykind she' get hysterical thinking she ran over a person, and she was too scared to get out and check, so I'd have to get out and check.

[Dee Dee Warren]

I forgot to return to this thread. I have never heard the whales one, but I can commisserate. I don't like anything underwater and some huge mammal underwwater does sound pretty icky,.

[Lucy]

Once a pastor at a church I used to attend also preached about those who are cowardly and he talked about his fear of flying and preached in Revelation where it said the cowardly are one of the sins condemned. Again, I just felt condemned.


First of all, having a phobia does NOT make you a coward. Cowards are people who run from problems instead of trying to find ways to fix them. A coward will NEVER face his fear, no matter the circumstances. "Courage is not the absense of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear."

Secondly, from what I have experienced and what I have researched, most phobias deal with a fear of losing control. On an airplane, you have virtually no control. You can't control where the plane flies, how much feul it has, the altitude--anything. And not being in control while cruising several thousand feet in the air is a scary thought. Personally, I'm not afraid of lfying (I don't think, anyway. Haven't flown since I was 2) but I am horribly acrophobic. My dad jokes that I get a nosebleed in wool socks :ahem: For me, if I have something to hold on to then it gives me enough sense of control that I can handle it. I'll still be terrified with my heart pounding and my body trembling, but I'll be able to put one foot in front of the other (which is why I was able to survive visiting the Statue of Liberty. THAT was scary :eek: )

So maybe there's a way for you to maintain some feeling of control while flying. You CAN learn to overcome phobias--I have been working on my fear of heights, and while it still terrifies me, I'm learning to deal with it. (For example, I REFUSE to let anyone else change the lightbulb in my ceiling fan. Standing on a chair to fix it scares me, and it usually takes a good 20-30 minutes for me to do it, but it helps me get used to my phobia). If just looking at pictures makes you nervous, then start there. Focus on trying to stay calm while looking at a picture of a plane, bridge, etc. Use breathing/meditation exercises. When you start to get really nervous/scared, put the picture down. Keep going a little at a time, and eventually you can train yourself to handle the fear. I doubt that it will ever go away, but you will be better equipped at handling it.

[3kixintehead]

I have some deep seated phobias, and it seems as I get older they get worse. That isn't really what the post is about though, and I ask for Christian or Christian-friendly only responses.

I was listening to Adrian Rodgers today and he had a sermon about fears and phobias. And I dunno, it just left me feeling guilty and condemned. He in no way intended that, but its not just so easy as saying to kick fear out of your life. Also I was speaking to someone today about my phobia of airplanes, and he was like "so what happened to you that made you have this fear"

It isn't like that. Nothing bad has EVER happened to me on an airplane, and when I was younger I traveled with my mother to visit relatives up north regularly. But as far back as I can remember I had been terrified of flying.

Once a pastor at a church I used to attend also preached about those who are cowardly and he talked about his fear of flying and preached in Revelation where it said the cowardly are one of the sins condemned. Again, I just felt condemned.

Isn't it possible in a fallen world that it isn't that phobic persons WANT to have phobias. Heck, if I would fly I could visit friends more often. Just as physical ailments are not promised healing, why is it that emotinal ailments are treated so differently?

After that sermon, I really and truly prayed long and hard about my phobia of flying. I even determined that I was going to do it, but even thinking about it makes me panic. There are plenty of things I am "afraid of" that I stand up to. I am not a coward, I have done plenty of things in great fear and trembling, but true phobias aren't like that. They are not a choice, and they are not rational. In fact being open and transparent about my phobias and battles iwth depression have taken courage as they can be used against me, to dismiss what I have to say. I don't care anymore - there are too many people living in guilt and shame.

Anyways, thoughts? Please no condemnation, I hear enough of that already.


Well, phobias are completely irrational (and sometimes unexplainable). There are some psychologists who deal with phobia removal if you want to seek help there. I wouldn't reccomend psychiatrists because they will just give you medicine that you'll become dependent (not necissarily addicted to) on and it really wont help heal you. It will just heal the symptom (in this case the fear) if that makes sense.
Its certainly not something to be ashamed of. I have a phobia of dogs (Cynophobia I think is what its called). I highly doubt that God condemns people for their fears. Cowardice is something far different than fear however. And bieng afraid is not a sin. Even Jesus was afraid. When he was in the garden praying before he was crucified he was asking God that if there was any way he could possibly get out of being crucified could he take it? In Luke 22:44 it describes his sweat as drops of blood. This is a known medical (Hey, even though I dont trust medical doctors doesn't mean they dont have good definitions xD) condition called "hematohidrosis". Its extremely rare, but it can occur in an individual who is feeling extreme anxiety...also known as fear. Also think of it this way. Without fear there would be nothing to be courageous about. So don't get fear and cowardice mixed up. :wink:
I hope this provides some insight.

[Dee Dee Warren]

Thank you for the post and the PM.

[Psychic Missile]

Ahh, phobias.

You know, there are times I envy people with 'normal' phobias like heights, tight spaces or the dark. People get that. Maybe they just make more sense to the average person, because they can be easily related (whether or not they do) to danger and death.

So here's the kicker--whales. Terrified of them, always have been. Isn't that weird? I'm not afraid of them as dangerous animals; I can appreciate, in that tiny logical part of my mind, that they are beautiful and graceful aspects of God's creation. But I can't stand seeing a cartoon pic of them on a T-shirt without getting a thudding shock and becoming all sweaty. Even typing the word right now is kinda creepy--seeing it on a page. Now *there's* a phobia.

I think I can remember the first really creepy moment I had; it may not have been the origin of the phobia. It was watching a scene in Free Willy, when the boy first sees in a lightning flash the whale in the underwater tank, and screams. So did I. And from that day till this, I still have nightmares about that scene.

Now, as phobias go you'd think it would be a fairly convenient one to have--one isn't confronted with whales as often as say, spiders or lifts. But not being based on rationality, it has rather odd side effects. There are shops I can't go into, because of postcards. I hate walking by shops which have big windows at night, because they remind me of the dark viewing tank. When I owned a TV, I used to fear flipping the channels alone in case I came across a National Geographic documentary with scary underwater scenes. (That happened a couple of times over the years, and yikes). I stayed overnight with a friend for years, and was secretly scared because she was into dolphins and had a big seascape photo on her wall. (Yes, the phobia extends to include underwater shots of any kind, dolphins, whales, very big ships and loomy things in general). I love the water, but I get very nervous about any body of water bigger than a puddle, and when swimming I get panic attacks if I put my head under water. I'm a rotten swimmer, which isn't too surprising, but I bet none of those swimming teachers had a clue why I wouldn't float on my back. And... I'm probably the only New Zealander who hasn't seen Whale Rider!

Although not as strong as yours, I too have a phobia of whales. Mostly whales, but other large sea creatures as well, especially sharks. Drawings are usually okay unless they're realistic, but and pictures and I feel fear and anxiety. I don't know if you're familiar with it, but the Natural History Museum in New York has a large room dedicated to sea life, and suspended from the roof of that room (the walls of which are lined with specimens) is a fiberglass whale, actual size. Obviously, this museum is a regular spot for fieldtrips, and I would have to wait outside the room. Just walking past the entrance to that room and looking away felt terrible.

I'm sure you're familiar with people hearing that you're afraid of whales, and saying "oh, they can't hurt you!"

[Jimmy Higgins]

So maybe there's a way for you to maintain some feeling of control while flying. You CAN learn to overcome phobias--I have been working on my fear of heights, and while it still terrifies me, I'm learning to deal with it. (For example, I REFUSE to let anyone else change the lightbulb in my ceiling fan. Standing on a chair to fix it scares me, and it usually takes a good 20-30 minutes for me to do it, but it helps me get used to my phobia). But unlike fear of height, which is irrational (hence a neurosis) at least these days, the fear of flying isn't nearly as irrational. Of course, people don't fear flying (or at least in my case). I fear plummeting in my last moments in life wishing to all things decent that I'd of taken the train instead! This is a rational fear. Planes have and will again crash, killing all those aboard. Fearing that this will be your end... not irrational. However fearing while, standing on the glass flooring on the top of the CN Tower... that's irrational. That flooring isn't going anywhere! Granted, there is an evolutionary reason why the irrational fear exists... making it have a rational source. But phobias are merely instinctual fears. Nothing more. Doesn't make the fear any more or less real... just makes it seem very real to the observor. As to the pastor in the OP... whatever dude.

Personally, I got over my fear of flying by telling myself I didn't care if the plane did crash. But then I found my lovely, on both flights since, scared of the plummeting again.

[Dee Dee Warren]

I often joke, it's not's the flying part I mind so much, it's the crashing part that I have an issue with.

[Jimmy Higgins]

I often joke, it's not's the flying part I mind so much, it's the crashing part that I have an issue with.Fear of flying... irrational.

Fear of plummeting... rational. :smile:

[Abigail]

The problem with plane crashes is that there is usually lots of fire ...and planes have those teeny tiny windows that I dont think a baby could even squish through

[Smokering]

Psychic Missile: Wow, it's... okay, I don't know what it is... to find someone else with the same phobia! 'Encouraging' is probably the wrong term. ;p Interesting, anyway.

I avoid museums completely. Entirely. Hate 'em. Te Papa museum, which is an extremely good, rather famous museum in Wellington NZ, is probably still reeling from the time I went there. My family forced me to go, and I did okay... until we got to the foyer, in which a huge and ancient anchor is suspended on the wall. Then I started to get a bit shivery. Next we had to go past a (reconstructed) 'stuffed' moa (extinct emu-like creature), which I had to do with my eyes closed and a sister dragging me past on each arm, covering my face. I kid you not. We went to see the 'Courtship' exhibition on the third floor, which I hoped would contain innocuous cases of Victorian fans. But nooo... stuffed stags at bay, ostensibly to demonstrate some point about courtship in the animal world. I'm sure there was a lot of room really, but it felt like I had to squeeze past them, close enough to touch... It was really horrible. Anyway, I more or less completely lost it when I read the sign for some of the 'nature' exhibits... Not a pretty sight. I wasn't exactly twitching on the floor, but if I hadn't gotten out within the next five minutes, that would have been me. Going back to the museum a year or two later, to see the LOTR exhibit (and the LOTR exhibit only!!), was possibly the bravest thing I have ever done. Curiously enough, seeing lifelike, life-size models of Uruk-hai and trolls, and even a replica dead-Boromir-in-the-boat, didn't bother me at all. Maybe geekdom simply transcends fear! :)

Anyway, I have since resigned myself to the fact that the British Museum, parts of which I would give my eyeteeth to see, is never going to have my patronage. I just couldn't deal with it. Even the tiny museum in my town, which boasts one waka and a few pottery sculptures, gives me the screaming heeby-jeebies. It's unfortunate.

And yes, I've heard the 'they won't hurt you' line. SO not the point. Incidentally, I get a bit creeped out by plesiosaurs and Nessie as well.

[Lucy]

I often joke, it's not's the flying part I mind so much, it's the crashing part that I have an issue with.

Yeah, the fall isn't the problem--it's that sudden stop at the end :wink:

[spazz]

Crazy. Smokering is the first person I've ever come across who seems to be going through exactly what I am. I always thought I was the only one with an absurd phobia of whales, and I too believe it may have been triggered by that scene in Free Willy... it's bloody ridiculous. I can't even look at a picture of one without feeling sick and having to turn away. As for life-size replicas, you can forget it. Free Willy was torture enough...

Any suggestions on how to deal with such ridiculous irrationalities?

[Dee Dee Warren]

I dunno.

[Carico]

Actually, I think it's perfectly natural to fear airplanes. If God had wanted us to fly, he would have given us wings. Afterall, the only thing that holds us thousands of miles above the earth are nuts and bolts and furthermore, we have no choice to get off. But what helps me is knowing that my life is in God's hands and he'll take me at his own time.

[NeilUnreal]

I have a phobia of spiders that seems to have first started, like in the movie Arachnophobia, when I was frightened by a spider as a toddler. Even after going through various biology classes, collecting, studying, and examining them, they still give me the horrors. I would honestly be more comfortable going to sleep with a hundred snakes crawling over me* than going to sleep in a room where I had seen a single quarter-inch spider.

The weirdest part of all is that it doesn't apply to tarantulas; they don't bother me. My mind seems to put them in a different category, presumably that of small, furry animals, rather than spiders. Another odd thing is that images of spiders have little effect on me; it's just the real thing that freaks me out, and in a totally irrational way that not even habituation (like when I studied spiders in biology) can seem to change.

-Neil

*I have zero, zilch, nada fear of most of the traditional animal horror fare: snakes, rats, bats, etc. :lol:

[Rahab]

I have a phobia of spiders that seems to have first started, like in the movie Arachnophobia, when I was frightened by a spider as a toddler. Even after going through various biology classes, collecting, studying, and examining them, they still give me the horrors. I would honestly be more comfortable going to sleep with a hundred snakes crawling over me* than going to sleep in a room where I had seen a single quarter-inch spider. In some ways, Neil, your fear of "single quarter inch" spiders is justified considering the small size of venomous spiders such as the Brown Recluse or the Red Back Spider.( hasseltii). However, spiders happen to be your useful pest control in your own home. I had learned in my childhood to cohabit with those creatures as they were efficient in controling the population of various bugs and insects in our homes. You can imagine what types of insects would crawl at night in the boonies of Senegal!

My phobia was bats.. I wrote "was" because since watching a documentary on the usefulness of bats, I have overcome my irrational fear of those gentle creatures. I am even considering placing a bat house in my yard.


The weirdest part of all is that it doesn't apply to tarantulas; they don't bother me. My mind seems to put them in a different category, presumably that of small, furry animals, rather than spiders. Maybe because you are aware of some folks in South America having them as pets. Even children do.Once we identify any creature as a potential pet we seek to domesticate and interact with, the rational tends to take over.




Another odd thing is that images of spiders have little effect on me; it's just the real thing that freaks me out, and in a totally irrational way that not even habituation (like when I studied spiders in biology) can seem to change.

-Neil

*I have zero, zilch, nada fear of most of the traditional animal horror fare: snakes, rats, bats, etc. :lol: Scorpions freak me out because I was stung by one as a child. I cannot help but relive the experience if I see one. Maybe your "spider trauma" as a kid takes you back there each time you see one.

Let me toy with your phobia for an instant... when my father lived in French Guyana, he would hear at night a "tapping" sound he could not identity. Until he woke up with an intense burning sensation on his leg. To discover the presence of a horrible looking spider, with one anterior leg longer than the others. He was told by a native about the "araignee bequille" (literaly translated as the "crutch spider"), whose longer leg taps the surface it walks on to intimidate its adversary. Those critters secrete an acid based substance which burns human skin and will dissolve the shell of most bugs.(brrrrr). Imagine now not just the visual effect but also the sound effect while you attempt to fall asleep with one of those in your room!

[Teallaura]

Spiders are cool - so long as they are not within three feet of me. Then they are very dead very fast.

They aren't allowed in the house either - but that's just routine pest control.


Still can't get above tht third step on a ladder though... :uhoh:

[Crow]

I am terrified of shotguns. This is particularly funny in a woman who will shoot any caliber of rifle or handgun and who has blown up a stainless steel Ruger Redhawk playing with hot handloads at the range and laughed at the guys who dropped and scattered.

My father was fearless around airplanes and explosives. But a common garden spider could have him in a cold sweat just watching it from 10 feet away.

I've handled large monitor lizards, tarantulas, 18 foot pythons, and venomous reptiles. I'm scared of a parrot or a parakeet. I wouldn't touch one for a thousand bucks. The thought of it makes my skin crawl. Something about that nasty sharp hooky bill.....

I think that on some subconscious level we make risk assessments that aren't entirely grounded in reality for whatever reason. It's funny that many people with phobias of stuff that seems absurd when you sit and think about it are fearless in other areas.

[Griggsy]

Amongst other neuroticisms, I have phobias.I think they can be due to chemical imbalances in our brains and do I have imbalances for which medications are doing their best to help me.Maybe a therapist could help you. I am not going to try to overcome my neausousness of height!

[Crow]

I feel that phobias are significant to the extent to which they hamper and bother us.

My shotgun phobia is a matter of comment and comedy amongst my range buddies. Since I've outshot many of them with AKs, 44s, 45s and 50s at one time or another, I laugh along. It is pretty strange and funny, even to me.

As far as hookbills go,it's been a source of big laughs too. Someone laughs at me and I chase them with a spider. More laughs.

I keep it in perspective. Yeah, it's dumb. Yeah, it doesn't make sense. And when all is said and done, it doesn't matter much to me. It's just another reminder to me that I'm far from the perfectly fearless critter that I once thought I could be. Maybe it's just a part of getting older that I can accept that I'm flawed just like the rest of humanity. Maybe we each need our Achilles' heel.

[Teallaura]

:shy: I'm afraid of Achille's heel...

[medical 2933]

A phobia is a type of anxiety disorder. It is a strong, irrational fear of something that poses little or no actual danger. There are many specific phobias

[Teallaura]

:hrm: Dude, are you gonna dig up every old thread you can find?

[Gabby]

It's called archive OCD. :wink:

[medical 2933]

Phobia is also used in a non-medical sense for aversions of all sorts. These terms are usually constructed with the suffix -phobia. A number of these terms describe negative attitudes or prejudices towards the named subjects. See Non-clinical uses of the term below.

[medical 2933]

# Abluthophobia8: Fear of bathing.
# Acarophobia: Fear of itching or of the insects that cause itching. Fear of skin infestation by mites or ticks3
# Acerophobia: Fear of sourness3.
# Achluophobia: Fear of darkness.
# Achluophobia: Fear of the dark or of night3. Synonyms: Nyctophobia, Scotophobia.
# Acousticophobia: Fear of noise
# Acrophobia: Fear of heights.

[Teallaura]

Nah, it's called 'our boy is a bot' (most likely).

[Storico]

# Abluthophobia8: Fear of bathing.
# Acarophobia: Fear of itching or of the insects that cause itching. Fear of skin infestation by mites or ticks3
# Acerophobia: Fear of sourness3.
# Achluophobia: Fear of darkness.
# Achluophobia: Fear of the dark or of night3. Synonyms: Nyctophobia, Scotophobia.
# Acousticophobia: Fear of noise
# Acrophobia: Fear of heights.

http://www.ojohaven.com/fun/phobias.html

And this is of course another unoriginal direct copy and paste from the above website. Well, medical, you're either a medicine-geek bot, or you're a bored plagiarist. You take your pick. :teeth:

[medical 2933]

The results of the experiment showed that it took far fewer shocks to create an adverse response to a picture of a snake than to a picture of a flower, leading to the conclusion that certain objects may have a genetic predisposition to being associated with fear.

[Griggsy]

Do any here use the placebo of religion to overcome phobias?

[Teallaura]

Take it elsewhere, Griggsy - this is not a debate area.

[Teallaura]

Phobophobia: Fear of phobias. [Book].

Source (http://www.ojohaven.com/fun/phobias.html)

:lmbo: I just knew it had to be there!

[Griggsy]

I should have asked: how does one use religion to overcome phobias?

[Smokering]

Well, I discovered a few days ago that my father has a fear of CHICKENS. Electophobia, I think it's called. He's not keen on swans or geese either; something about how they might flap in his face. Which is funny, because as the owner of two chickens I'd call them the LEAST flappy birds around. I get that swans are scary, though. :p