Marriage- does God pick your spouse?

[makemesmile]

Hmmm, newbie here, not positive this is the correct forum, forgive me and move it if I'm wrong.

I have a question about Christian marriage. it seems some people think there is "the one" right person for them and if they marry the "wrong one" God is going to really mess up their lives

for example.
http://www.evangelicaloutreach.org/christiansingles.htm

"The devil has and still is tempting single Christians with a potential spouse that is not right for him or her, or one that is not a real Christian at all. It only makes spiritual sense that he would do this since his chief goal is to destroy souls. He can also manipulate circumstances and people at times, according to the Book of Job. Be sure the devil will have some of his children attend the same so-called Christian single events that you do—so be on your guard!"

Others think that it us up to them to chose a spouse and God will bless them as long their choice has been made within defined scriptural boundaries.



What do you think and do you have scripture to support it? There are some really personal reasons I'm asking this, so it's not just theory to me. I AM married and my spouse has informed me he believes he missed God's will by marrying me but has not biblical reason for divorce. What do I do with that???

[ApologiaPhoenix]

Oh geez. This is the kind of stuff I hate to hear espoused in Christian circles. Let's assume that view is true and let's assume you married the wrong person.

Well, you two were meant for someone else so those others have to marry someone else. There's 4 with bad marriages.

Then the same happens. There's 8.

And on and on and on.

Congratulations. Your one mistake screwed up God's plan entirely for humanity and marriage.

NO! There isn't one person you ought to marry. You're to marry a type of person and you're to be a type of person in marriage. This idea is a more individualistic concept. Marriage should not be based on feelings but on who the other person is and who you are.

I urge you to go to STR.org and get a copy of "Decision Making and the Will of God." You can also buy a book of the same title. I HIGHLY recommend them.

Hope this helps!
ApologiaPhoenix

[lee_merrill]

1 Corinthians 7:39 ... if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.

Not "anyone she wishes who is not someone else's perfect spouse"!

Blessings,
Lee

[Teluog]

So how does one wisely go about deciding who to marry or start dating?

What other verses does the Bible give? There's all this cultural stuff that is rampant even in the church and here at Bible College where people talk about compatibility in the same way that the rest of the world does. Yet the Bible doesn't seem to say much, making it seem like anyone can just get together and work things out. So why don't we all just pick someone and start dating that person?

[ApologiaPhoenix]

Teluog. Go for it. Pick someone and start dating that person. Here are the biblical requirements.

Someone of the opposite sex.
A Christian.
Someone who will help you grow to be more like Christ.

It might serve you well to ask what kind of husband you'll be.