Announcement

Collapse

Biblical Ethics 301 Guidelines

This forum is for Christians to discuss ethical issues within Christianity. Non-theists, non-christians, and unorthodox Christians should not post here without first getting permission from the area's moderators.

If you have a question about what's OK and what's not OK, please contact the moderators.


Forum Rules: Here
See more
See less

My predicament.

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • My predicament.

    I am in a bind.

    My family does not believe and as my faith grows stronger I inevitably come into contact with their unbelief. It has lead my family into screaming matches. It is horrible.

    When they see I have or am reading the bible they say I believe a myth. When I say I want to read Narnia they say "Aslan is Jesus thats it." They have said I am insane.

    I want to leave at some point. Get my own house. Get a job. Find a church.

    I need some prayer. I need some advice.
    If I stay I am like a candle to be snuffed out. If I leave my grandparents will take care of me but my family will be even more antoginistic


    I want to see my family come to faith.
    I am unsure of what to do.
    sigpic

  • #2
    I feel I should point something out. I plan on moving out at some point anyway. So should I try to move out later or earlier?

    It is bearable at home but it is just that. Bearable.
    sigpic

    Comment


    • #3
      Doesn't sound like they respect you very much. It's hard living under that kind of scrutiny. Best to exit gracefully before it gets too bad, IMHO
      That's what
      - She

      Without a clear-cut definition of sin, morality becomes a mere argument over the best way to train animals
      - Manya the Holy Szin (The Quintara Marathon)

      I may not be as old as dirt, but me and dirt are starting to have an awful lot in common
      - Stephen R. Donaldson

      Comment


      • #4
        Pray for Wisdom.
        Seriously

        And start the Proverbs Bible Reading Program!

        No matter what day of the month it is -- today is the third -- read that chapter of Proverbs.

        If you get out of the habit, no problem - just pick up your Bible, turn to the chapter of Proverbs corresponding to whatever the day of the month is.

        I'll be praying for Wisdom for you, and I'm contemplating sharing a story that you might appreciate.
        The first to state his case seems right until another comes and cross-examines him.

        Comment


        • #5
          Do not sever or irreparably harm relationships with your family. Learn to smile at their attempts to help you see things the way they do. It is motivated by their love for you just as is also your desire for their conversion. In the end, your forbearance, patience, and active love for them in the million little things of daily life will have more impact on them than most anything else. As you reach out to them with love and respect, they too will learn to better respect your choices and faith. It may take a while and you may never see the fruits of your devotion to them, but I suspect you will, and God will bless you immensely with much wisdom and and grace for your patience.
          βλέπομεν γὰρ ἄρτι δι᾿ ἐσόπτρου ἐν αἰνίγματι, τότε δὲ πρόσωπον πρὸς πρόσωπον·
          ἄρτι γινώσκω ἐκ μέρους, τότε δὲ ἐπιγνώσομαι καθὼς καὶ ἐπεγνώσθην.

          אָכֵ֕ן אַתָּ֖ה אֵ֣ל מִסְתַּתֵּ֑ר אֱלֹהֵ֥י יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מוֹשִֽׁיעַ׃

          Comment


          • #6
            Proverbs reading program? Its brilliant. It also fits well with my current reading the bible in a year goal.

            I to pray for wisdom. I pray for my daily bread or rather our daily bread.

            I in no way want to burn the bridge to my family. My behavior will be the best shot I have.
            sigpic

            Comment


            • #7
              Thank you guys.

              Hey CP you sais you had a story right? I think we should hear it
              sigpic

              Comment


              • #8
                I would recommend that you get a job and find someplace else to stay, if only so you can become financially independent (and if living at home is stopping you, go to church). You could still spend time with your family, especially on holidays, but it would give you a better environment.
                Enter the Church and wash away your sins. For here there is a hospital and not a court of law. Do not be ashamed to enter the Church; be ashamed when you sin, but not when you repent. – St. John Chrysostom

                Veritas vos Liberabit<>< Learn Greek <>< Look here for an Orthodox Church in America<><Ancient Faith Radio
                sigpic
                I recommend you do not try too hard and ...research as little as possible. Such weighty things give me a headache. - Shunyadragon, Baha'i apologist

                Comment


                • #9
                  OK, for what it's worth....

                  We had a girl in our youth group who faithfully attended Church, and was just a joy to be around.
                  One day she showed up with what seemed to be an unusual amount of makeup. I had a feeling she was hiding some abuse, but she insisted she fell in her bedroom and hit her bedpost.

                  A couple weeks later, she had a cracked lip, and bruising around her mouth. Another fall - no worries, all is well!

                  The next time, she was wearing dark glasses, and when I tried to talk to her, she wouldn't look at me. I knew for sure she was being abused.

                  My wife and I took her to another room, where she opened up - her Mom had left several years earlier, and she lived alone with her Dad. He was a drinker. She said "when he's sober, he's a good guy, and we get along great". But, apparently, when he's drinking, he comes home, and if she hadn't done the dishes exactly right, or put them away exactly right, or made the beds or put her school books just so, he would fly into a rage and scream at her, and slap her.

                  It was heartbreaking to hear her story, and I had already been told by an older couple in my Church "if she needs a place to stay, we'll be glad to let her live with us". (My wife and I were just a young couple then, with a newborn baby in a small apartment)

                  When I offered Linny the opportunity to move in with some loving "grandparent" types, she just started sobbing. What she said next was absolutely incredible.

                  She said, "I know my daddy loves me, and he's good to me when he's sober. He doesn't know Jesus, and he's mad at the world. I just know that some day he'll come home sober, and he'll want to talk, and if I'm not there, there won't be anybody to tell him about Jesus".

                  Wow - talk about a dilemma! I was concerned for her safety and well being, but her conviction to be a witness to her father was unshakeable.

                  I wish the story had a happy ending, but he ended up getting in a fight in a bar, got beat up really bad, and died a few weeks later from complications, including broken ribs, cirrhosis of the liver and damaged kidneys. (I don't remember all the details)

                  Linny, of course, was heartbroken, but she said, "I know I did everything I could possibly do to be a witness to him".

                  That was a very powerful testimony in my life, because I had been through some ugly teenage rebellion, and was, for a short time, incredibly disrespectful of my own good Christian parents, and caused them great grief and misery.

                  For months, my last thought each night before going to bed was "I deserved her dad, and she deserved my good Christian parents".

                  I'm not telling you what to do, brother - you know how tough it is in your home, I don't.

                  This story with Linny occurred over about a year, and there were times she told me her Dad wouldn't allow her to come to Church activities.

                  I remember telling her, "make it a game -- try to figure out what he'll want you to do, and do it before he has to ask. Make the beds, clean up the dishes, do the laundry... all the stuff you know he'll look for, and do it 'as unto the Lord'. And when he's sober, or you think you can reason with him, tell him, "Daddy, I did the dishes, the laundry, put all the (whatever....), so, would you mind if I went to the youth meeting tomorrow night?"

                  She told me once, "I was going down the hall to my bedroom, and I heard him talking to somebody on the phone - he was saying 'no, I think she must be into drugs or something because her whole personality is WAY different, and I can't figure it out". She laughed when she told me that.

                  This was all... probably... about 40 years ago. I hadn't heard from her in ages, but about 3 or 4 years ago she found me on Facebook. She's a beautiful woman with a good Christian husband, a couple of good kids, and she made me cry just telling me how much she enjoyed our youth ministry, and that God saw her through all her pain and sorrow.
                  The first to state his case seems right until another comes and cross-examines him.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I would recommend making sure that you can make it on your own financially before moving out. You don't want to find yourself in the position of having to ask to move back in.

                    I'm always still in trouble again

                    "You're by far the worst poster on TWeb" and "TWeb's biggest liar" --starlight (the guy who says Stalin was a right-winger)
                    "Overall I would rate the withdrawal from Afghanistan as by far the best thing Biden's done" --Starlight
                    "Of course, human life begins at fertilization that’s not the argument." --Tassman

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by TheWall View Post
                      Proverbs reading program? Its brilliant. It also fits well with my current reading the bible in a year goal.

                      I to pray for wisdom. I pray for my daily bread or rather our daily bread.

                      I in no way want to burn the bridge to my family. My behavior will be the best shot I have.
                      "Wisdom" is, as far as I can tell, the only thing the Bible commands us to "get" --- Get wisdom, get understanding... and, the promise that, if we lack wisdom, ask God, and he'll give it to us liberally.
                      The first to state his case seems right until another comes and cross-examines him.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I agree wholeheartedly on getting a job. My college schedule is designed for a job. I think I need to get serious and talk to my grandpa about that. He can help me find a job.
                        sigpic

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by TheWall View Post
                          I agree wholeheartedly on getting a job. My college schedule is designed for a job. I think I need to get serious and talk to my grandpa about that. He can help me find a job.
                          A wise choice appropriate for a discussion involving wisdom

                          I'm always still in trouble again

                          "You're by far the worst poster on TWeb" and "TWeb's biggest liar" --starlight (the guy who says Stalin was a right-winger)
                          "Overall I would rate the withdrawal from Afghanistan as by far the best thing Biden's done" --Starlight
                          "Of course, human life begins at fertilization that’s not the argument." --Tassman

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Yes, it is always good to be self-supporting. I wish more people would realize this and embrace hard work and productivity. Not everyone is in a position to do this, of course, but as soon as you can, it will afford you the opportunity to grow in wisdom and stature at an accelerated rate.
                            βλέπομεν γὰρ ἄρτι δι᾿ ἐσόπτρου ἐν αἰνίγματι, τότε δὲ πρόσωπον πρὸς πρόσωπον·
                            ἄρτι γινώσκω ἐκ μέρους, τότε δὲ ἐπιγνώσομαι καθὼς καὶ ἐπεγνώσθην.

                            אָכֵ֕ן אַתָּ֖ה אֵ֣ל מִסְתַּתֵּ֑ר אֱלֹהֵ֥י יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מוֹשִֽׁיעַ׃

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by robrecht View Post
                              Yes, it is always good to be self-supporting. I wish more people would realize this and embrace hard work and productivity. Not everyone is in a position to do this, of course, but as soon as you can, it will afford you the opportunity to grow in wisdom and stature at an accelerated rate.
                              One aspect of that wrt to TW's situation is that parents just don't tend to take what their children say all that seriously while they are still living under their roof. You need to show that your a mature, responsible adult before that will ever change.

                              I'm always still in trouble again

                              "You're by far the worst poster on TWeb" and "TWeb's biggest liar" --starlight (the guy who says Stalin was a right-winger)
                              "Overall I would rate the withdrawal from Afghanistan as by far the best thing Biden's done" --Starlight
                              "Of course, human life begins at fertilization that’s not the argument." --Tassman

                              Comment

                              widgetinstance 221 (Related Threads) skipped due to lack of content & hide_module_if_empty option.
                              Working...
                              X