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Thread: Silence, Loaded Questions, and not knowing what to do.

  1. #1
    tWebber
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    Silence, Loaded Questions, and not knowing what to do.

    I often find that when my faith comes to clash with my family I am always put on the defensive. They jump down my throat and attack me. They tease me with blasphemous songs and crude and often intellectually slips hod jokes. When I am silent they think I am unwilling or beaten by their questions. They accuse me of bad etiquette despite their ad hominid and badgering. I dare not repay them with evil. When I arguever though they think I am pulling things from thin air like a magician. Yet they spread lies and misinformation like a disease.

    They know I am transformed yet refuse to see Christ as the root of the transformation. Perhaps they think I am just acting as if I am holier than thou. I pray I don't give that I pressing to anyone.

    The spirit often moves me when I don't know what to do. It tells me at times to be silent and reminds me the pain and mocking will not be forever. It compelling me to learn and fight against what tempts me. It compelling me to pray for them. Oh how I pray they can one day see the light.

    I wish I knew how I could show them the truth of Christianity. I wonder am I coward?

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    tWebber Faber's Avatar
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    Your silence probably speaks louder than words could ever speak. Living the Christian life is showing them the truth of the Gospel. Keep living it and don't give up.

  3. Amen TheWall amen'd this post.
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    tWebber
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    You know Faber I read something similar when I read a book by Ravi Zachariah. He talked about how Jesus'said silence before pirate and the San hedging said volumes.

    I must admit I often use something Jesus himself said in saying things like " you have said so" but yeah the silence says a lot. My soul cries out and sometimes I literally do cry.

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    Troll Magnet Sparko's Avatar
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    Before I was a Christian (long before) there was a Christian at work. He never preached or tried to convert anyone, but he was openly Christian, would tell anyone who asked, prayed at lunchtime before eating, and behaved in a very humble, Christianlike manner.

    People used to mock him, including me, not really mean mocking, but mocking nonetheless. Yet even then I felt guilty about it, and eventually stopped. Years later, his attitude still influenced me and I wanted to be like him. He made me open to becoming a Christian years later. All without saying a word, and never complaining about the mocking. I wonder where he is now? I would love to thank him.

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    Department Head
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheWall View Post
    I often find that when my faith comes to clash with my family I am always put on the defensive. They jump down my throat and attack me. They tease me with blasphemous songs and crude and often intellectually slips hod jokes. When I am silent they think I am unwilling or beaten by their questions. They accuse me of bad etiquette despite their ad hominid and badgering. I dare not repay them with evil. When I arguever though they think I am pulling things from thin air like a magician. Yet they spread lies and misinformation like a disease.

    They know I am transformed yet refuse to see Christ as the root of the transformation. Perhaps they think I am just acting as if I am holier than thou. I pray I don't give that I pressing to anyone.

    The spirit often moves me when I don't know what to do. It tells me at times to be silent and reminds me the pain and mocking will not be forever. It compelling me to learn and fight against what tempts me. It compelling me to pray for them. Oh how I pray they can one day see the light.

    I wish I knew how I could show them the truth of Christianity. I wonder am I coward?
    Honey, you not responding in kind and remaining silent will have it's influence. if you keep striving to live the christian life it will show the lies to be what they are. and one day they will ask you what truely transformed you.

    That you pray for your family shows your transformation.

    You are not a coward infact in remaining silence to unjust accusations and remaining true to Jesus's example shows your courage.

    as always you will be in my prayers

  7. Amen TheWall amen'd this post.
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    Professor Littlejoe's Avatar
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    You've gotten some good advice so far...building on what has already been said, respect of someone, IMHBAO, has to do with what I like to call Frame. This is a principle that took me many, many years to learn...It took a lot of years just to realize that I need it, then more time to cultivate it. I certainly didn't have at your age. But, you can start now, and improve with every passing day. Frame in your life, is similar to context in a quoted Bible verse...where it comes from and what it defines and how it defines it. You certainly need to continue to not respond strongly or negatively to their taunts and digs...but learn to develop a...nonchalant-ness about it. You are impervious to their crap. Think "Luke Cage", hardly anything can even hurt him, it just bounces off, he doesn't back down...he just calmly smiles or tosses the offender aside. You develop that in your personality (not physically). Look up the concept of A&A, (agree and amplify) React to blasphemous songs and digs with a eye roll and a little laugh...then say, "do you talk to you mother with that mouth" and smile real big...and with a shrug of your shoulders. Let it roll off. Water off of a ducks back, It's like dealing with a bully, they want you upset, scared, on your heels....don't go there. I don't know you well enough to point you to the correct analogy...but it's about holding your Frame like Captain Picard facing down the Romulans, Thor facing down the Ice Giants, no fear, no yelling, just calm assurance, and a wry smile. like this:

    wry1.jpgwry-picard.jpg

    Calm gentle assertiveness is what you want in your frame. Don't let them upset you...then you are in their Frame. You are in control so stay in your Frame...don't let them drag you into their Frame. Whoever maintains Frame is in control of the room, the conversation, the relationship. Be the Captain of the House...I hope this makes some sense.
    Last edited by Littlejoe; 11-30-2016 at 07:28 PM.
    "What has the Church gained if it is popular, but there is no conviction, no repentance, no power?" - A.W. Tozer

    "... there are two parties in Washington, the stupid party and the evil party, who occasionally get together and do something both stupid and evil, and this is called bipartisanship." - Everett Dirksen

  9. Amen Jedidiah, logician bones amen'd this post.
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    tWebber
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    Huh. Wow.

    Cool. They are talking about zoroaster right now. I wish she would realize how unhistorical they are being. For now I just sit back, relax, and pretend and imagine how C.S Lewis would react to them.

  11. Amen Littlejoe, RumTumTugger amen'd this post.
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    Professor Littlejoe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheWall View Post
    Huh. Wow.

    Cool. They are talking about zoroaster right now. I wish she would realize how unhistorical they are being. For now I just sit back, relax, and pretend and imagine how C.S Lewis would react to them.
    Yep! That'll work. Just like C.S. Lewis, their weird idea's don't faze you...I can imagine C.S. Lewis being right in the middle of that discussion calmly correcting their misstatements and eventually leading them around to the Gospel.
    "What has the Church gained if it is popular, but there is no conviction, no repentance, no power?" - A.W. Tozer

    "... there are two parties in Washington, the stupid party and the evil party, who occasionally get together and do something both stupid and evil, and this is called bipartisanship." - Everett Dirksen

  13. Amen TheWall amen'd this post.
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    tWebber
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    They make me more annoyed than anything.

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    tWebber
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    I say that not because they are annoying but because misinformation annoys me.

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