Dad

[Sparko]

Yeah, I'm not worried about "being there when he passes", as we (Mrs CP and I) and a really good visit with him earlier this year. My sister sent pictures of him in the nursing home, and he doesn't even look like "Dad". He's kinda bloated, and looks bald, and just... It's not him.

When Mom passed, I preached her funeral, and I think we hit the perfect balance of reverence and joy. It was, indeed, a celebration of a woman - a prayer warrior - who spent a long time on this planet making a difference in a lot of lives.

Heck, if it weren't for Mom and Dad - Tweb wouldn't have ME!

Don't tell Sea!

[Sparko]

When I was about 18, my oldest brother, Paul, died of cancer at the age of 27. I didn't know how to pray. (I've mentioned this elsewhere, I know)

I saw him lying there in the hospital, ridden with cancer - he had cancer in his cheek walls, inside his nose, all his vital organs - and I'm thinking "how do I even pray?" Should I pray for complete healing, knowing it's entirely unlikely, or does that show how little my faith is. If I pray for God to let him live, will he be in this pain and misery? It was a really tough time and one of those "Crisis of Faith" things Blackaby talks about.

Later that night I went out on the fishing pier where he and I used to fish, and I told the Lord what I just described - I don't even know how to pray... is it my lack of faith?

For one of the VERY few times I feel I heard God "talking" (nothing audible, but something deep inside) I felt God clearly say "I'm bringing him home".

An incredible peace came over me, and I finally knew how to pray.

When I stopped by my parents house, where my 5 younger sisters were crying, I was able to be strong. I told them "God has everything under control", but I didn't tell them about my experience at the pier.

I was able to comfort them, and be strong for them. When my brother passed, it was "OK" with me - not a shock - I was prepared.

Meanwhile, I had taken some college classes an hour away, and had an "adopted mom and dad" there - people in the church I attended who, for whatever reason, decided to be my "adopted parents" while I was in their town. They had been praying for Paul, and I wanted to tell them he was gone.

As "dad" (my "adopted" dad) met me at the door, I smiled and said "My brother...." and that's all the words I could get out, and just began crying like a baby. "Dad" was a big tough Marine kind of guy, and he just hugged me real hard, didn't say a word, and we just stood there for a minute. Then everything was OK.

I think the 'moment' at the Rebel Alliance meeting was like that - I seem to need just one time to "let it out", then I'm good.

So, for the record -- I'm good!

When my Dad died and I wasn't there, I felt guilty. Not just for missing his passing (it was sudden and he was in the hospital about 2 hours away from me so I couldn't get there) but because I felt guilty for not even wanting to see him. Not that way. He was always a strong man and to see him wasting away with cancer in a hospital bed with them having to vacuum out his lungs so he wouldn't choke, it was too much for me. My mom went a lot more peacefully. And it made me feel at peace with her passing.

[Bill the Cat]

When my Dad died and I wasn't there, I felt guilty. Not just for missing his passing (it was sudden and he was in the hospital about 2 hours away from me so I couldn't get there) but because I felt guilty for not even wanting to see him. Not that way. He was always a strong man and to see him wasting away with cancer in a hospital bed with them having to vacuum out his lungs so he wouldn't choke, it was too much for me. My mom went a lot more peacefully. And it made me feel at peace with her passing.

You guys remember how I was when my mom passed 2 years ago. I felt the same. I didn't want to watch mom deteriorate. Having her not remember my girls' names was hard on me. Watching her gasp for air near the end was excruciating. And missing her by less than a mile... Still hurts. I pray for you and your family CP. Peace be with you, my brother.

[rogue06]

So, I'm not a very emotional guy - I tend to be somewhat of a toughnick (Former Navy/Air Force/Cop/Oilfield) but we had our Rebel Alliance meeting yesterday, and when we shared prayer requests, I had planned on just giving an update on my Dad, and turned into a blubbering idiot.

One of my Pastor friends, who had just lost his 92 year old Dad last month, said, "You know, we all turn into 4 year olds when Dad dies".

Yup.

When my father passed I was the one selected to call our closest relatives since I'm the one known for being a, well, hard ass. The one who didn't cry when he watched Old Yeller, Love Story or Brian's Song. But I broke down pretty much as soon as I started speaking and couldn't get a coherent sentence out. I had to hand the phone to my brother who is much more sentimental and emotional than I am to break the news.

[Cow Poke]

Yup.

When my father passed I was the one selected to call our closest relatives since I'm the one known for being a, well, hard ass. The one who didn't cry when he watched Old Yeller, Love Story or Brian's Song. But I broke down pretty much as soon as I started speaking and couldn't get a coherent sentence out. I had to hand the phone to my brother who is much more sentimental and emotional than I am to break the news.

That reminds me of when my son-in-law died, and we had his cop funeral. The Sheriff had asked me (I was officiating) to give a message to the officers from him - "Blake has our backs".

At the appropriate time, and with all due pomp and circumstance, I stood by the head of the casket, and said very clearly and officially... "The Sheriff has asked me to give you a message...." Then I got a lump in my throat and couldn't swallow, and stood there trying to talk, but just kept trying to swallow that "lump"....

I just knew the officers were thinking ... "WHAT, the Sheriff told you to tell us WHAT?!?!?!!" I finally got it out, but it wasn't so strong and official.

[Adrift]

My thoughts and prayers are with you CP.

[Cow Poke]

Hospice Nurse said "could be hours" - he's doing the 'death rattle'.

[DesertBerean]

Go with God, Bro. Your church can take care of itself.

[Cow Poke]

Go with God, Bro. Your church can take care of itself.

Yup - thanks.

[Cow Poke]

So, we drove through the night, leaving home about 6 PM Friday and arriving Columbus OH area some time after 4 PM Saturday. ONLY traffic congestion we ran into was Louisville and Cincinnati - VERY little congestion in Columbus. I've never come through Cincinnati without major traffic problems.

ANYWAY, my next-to-youngest sister from Atlanta area texted us as we were leaving Texas into Oklahoma, and they were just leaving their house. Long story short, we were comparing progress of our drives, and both of our GPS forecast an ETA of within 1 minute of each other. Sure enough, we arrived at the Nursing Home ONE MINUTE before my sister and her husband and daughter. That was kinda fun.

But what you're really interested in....

Dad was sleeping when we got here, and as we sat in his room (Nursing home was so accommodating - they put him in a room big enough for us (about 20 of us) to fit in with him - and he appeared to be in no pain or discomfort at all. I had a good time visiting with my siblings and their spouses and kids yesterday evening - then we reassembled there again this morning.

His breathing seemed to change from -- hard to describe unless you've been there - no longer chest or abdomen moving, but just light 'mouth breathing' - the brain was telling his body to breathe, but there was no force behind it at all. It was obvious to me he was really near the end.

Long story short - he "went to Sunday Morning Church in Heaven" -- passing very quietly and peacefully this morning about 11:35 AM.

All I can say --- It is Well With My Soul.

and -- Thank you, Jesus.

[mossrose]

Continuing in prayer for you and your family, dear brother. And praising the Lord that He has brought another beloved son into His presence.

[rogue06]

[Bill the Cat]

Praying for comfort and peace for you and your family, CP.

[RumTumTugger]

[Sparko]

I am glad you and your family got to be there with him!