Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here

[roadwalker]

Two cannibals are eating a clown.

One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

I told that about three or four pages back. We're starting to repeat each other.

[Cow Poke]

I told that about three or four pages back. We're starting to repeat each other.

It's inevitable.

But did you hear the one about the cannibals who ate the clown?


OK... try this....


A couple cannibals go into a cannibal restaurant, and they're checking out the menu.....

US Congressman: $6.50
Lawyer: $2.50
West Virginia Hillbilly $27.50

one of the cannibals asks the waiter... "hey, I understand why congressmen and lawyers would be so cheap, cause they're in vast supply, and not worth a whole lot... but this West Virginia Hillbilly for $27.50 --- what's up with THAT?!?!?!?!

The waiter replies.... "You ever try to CLEAN one of those guys???"

[roadwalker]

A burglar breaks into a house. All of a sudden he hears a voice saying, "Jesus is watching you!"

He turns around, looks and doesn't see anything.

He goes into another room, and again he hears, "Jesus is watching you!"

Again he turns around quickly, looks and sees nothing.

He walks into a third room. There is a birdcage in it with a parrot. The parrot looks at him and says, "Jesus is watching you!"

"How would you know?" asks the burglar, starting to get angry. "Who are you anyway?"

"The name's Finistere!" says the parrot.

"Finistere?!" says, the burglar, "What kind of a moron would name a parrot, 'Finistere?"

The parrot answers, "The same moron that named the rottweiler Jesus!"

[roadwalker]

Q: Is it true that an alligator won't attack a man with a flashlight?

A; It depends on how fast he can run with the flashlight.

[roadwalker]

The waiter replies.... "You ever try to CLEAN one of those guys???"

Of course trying to clean up Congress would be a truly hopeless task.

[Cow Poke]

A Louisiana Swampland Exhibit was advertising free water skiing for Yankees.

A New York Reporter went down to take a look, and, sure enough, Louisiana residents with their boats were lined up, meeting up with Yankees on the pier taking turns being pulled out into the swamp, water skiing out into the bayou.

The Reporter mentioned to one of the Louisiana boaters, "I guess the hard feelings about the Civil War are all gone, and the South is being downright magnanimous"

The Cajun replied, Well, first, I don't know what mangammanous is, but you're obviously not very smart!

It's the "War of Northern Aggression", not the "Civil War", and I guess you've never seen Cajuns trollin for gators before!

[Cow Poke]

Of course trying to clean up Congress would be a truly hopeless task.

See my joke about "trollin for gators"

[roadwalker]

It was one year ago tomorrow... Bin Laden woke up, surrounded by clouds, and realizing he was dead, he eagerly began waiting for his 72 Virgins.

Instead, a furious looking George Washington strode up to him, beat the tar out of him and walked away.

Rubbing his bruises, bin Laden got up, looked up and said, "OK, I guess maybe I deserved that. Now where are my 72 virgins?" But when he looked down again, an enraged Thomas Jefferson was staring him in the face, and Jefferson beat the dickens out of bin Laden again.

This time, bin Laden was a little slower getting up, and when he did, instead of 72 virgins he was standing face to face with James Madison. Madison was a small man but he had a solid oak cane, which he weilded with great effect and beat bin Laden back down to the cloud surface.

Bin Laden was in a world of hurt by now, and moaned, "But where are those 72 virgins?" As he staggered up he saw a boiling mad James Monroe striding towards him, pounding his fist angrily into his hand. He also saw a long line, including Thomas Paine, Robert E. Lee, Woodrow Wilson and many others. Washington, Jefferson and Madison had simply cycled back to the end of the line, ready for another turn.

Bin Laden heard from the clouds a voice coming back to him. It thundered, "You read that wrong. You get to spend eternity with 72 VIRGINIANS!"

[roadwalker]

Speaking of terrorists, how come there are no blonde suicide bombers?

When they get to the part about 'blow yourself up' they keep checking all over themselves for the air valve, and never can find it.

[rogue06]

Speaking of terrorists, how come there are no blonde suicide bombers?

When they get to the part about 'blow yourself up' they keep checking all over themselves for the air valve, and never can find it.

Except the one who tried to blow up a car and burned her lips on the exhaust pipe.

[Cow Poke]

Except the one who tried to blow up a car and burned her lips on the exhaust pipe.

It was a school bus, and she has since "apowwowived".

[rogue06]

[rogue06]

It was a school bus, and she has since "apowwowived".

Did you know Austria suposedly has banned blonde jokes as part of their war on terrorism? Sorry, there's no punchline.

[Cow Poke]

Did you know Austria suposedly has banned blonde jokes as part of their war on terrorism? Sorry, there's no punchline.

Is that some kind of redirect for the Onion?

[Astra49]

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_CcHV2wFn64...mb+blonde1.jpg



Very funny!!!!! Love it!!!!