Results 166 to 180 of 1765
Thread: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
-
December 7th 2010, 01:02 PM #166
I'll Be Back, Therefore I Am
- Join Date
- January 20th, 2009
- Location
- Ryde, Isle of Wight, UK
- Posts
- 12,456
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
He's the CEO, he's the COO, and I'm the head of the agricultural division. The CIEIO.
Crab Battle
noun
Words uttered to incite an all in brawl. Whoever says the words 'Crab Battle' will usually be spear tackled to the ground by anyone else present, and all parties will then engage in a fight to the death.
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible to our fixed, restricted fields of vision. Existence taken for granted, absolute. Possessed, owned, controlled by the common sense-infected rational gaze, onward forever we walk among the ignorant. Never stray from the common lines.
My blog . My book. My YouTube channel.
-
December 14th 2010, 10:59 AM #167
I'll Be Back, Therefore I Am
- Join Date
- January 20th, 2009
- Location
- Ryde, Isle of Wight, UK
- Posts
- 12,456
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Dr. Jeckyll's assistant: "That's odd. The formula you use to turn into Mr. Hyde looks a lot like 6 cans of Stella."
Crab Battle
noun
Words uttered to incite an all in brawl. Whoever says the words 'Crab Battle' will usually be spear tackled to the ground by anyone else present, and all parties will then engage in a fight to the death.
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible to our fixed, restricted fields of vision. Existence taken for granted, absolute. Possessed, owned, controlled by the common sense-infected rational gaze, onward forever we walk among the ignorant. Never stray from the common lines.
My blog . My book. My YouTube channel.
-
December 16th 2010, 01:41 PM #168
Evolution IS God's I.D.
- Join Date
- December 25th, 2006
- Location
- Southeastern U.S.
- Posts
- 41,915
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow?
It’s making headlines
Which side of a cheetah has the most spots?
The outside
What is the best way to carve wood?
Whittle by whittle
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi
Always strive to keep an open mind – but not so open that your brains fall out!Still afeared of & dodging The PINTM
-
December 20th 2010, 11:17 PM #169
Anastasia's Grandad
---
- Join Date
- June 1st, 2005
- Posts
- 19,209
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - Christian (other)Re: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Helen calls her husband, Frank, and warns him that some nut is driving in the wrong direction on the highway.
"One nut, nothing" says Frank. "There are hundreds of them."Evil lurks in the hearts of men.
Tassman's POON Theory of the universe = It has "arisen naturally from nothing".
"I do like Tassmans mind" -- Bertatberts
-
December 22nd 2010, 09:50 AM #170
Anastasia's Grandad
---
- Join Date
- June 1st, 2005
- Posts
- 19,209
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - Christian (other)Re: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
A pastor goes on a safari.
First day the guide yells : "look at that! Did you see it? Did you see it?"
Pastor says "no what was it?
Guide says "It was a tribe of pygmies."
Second day the guide yells : "look at that! Did you see it? Did you see it?"
Pastor says "no what was it?
Guide says "It was a herd of elephants."
Third day the guide yells : "look at that! Did you see it? Did you see it?"
Pastor afraid to admit he did not says "Yes I saw it."
Guide says "Then why did you step in it?"Evil lurks in the hearts of men.
Tassman's POON Theory of the universe = It has "arisen naturally from nothing".
"I do like Tassmans mind" -- Bertatberts
-
December 22nd 2010, 10:10 AM #171
I'll Be Back, Therefore I Am
- Join Date
- January 20th, 2009
- Location
- Ryde, Isle of Wight, UK
- Posts
- 12,456
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Safari guide: "Can you see the lions, and the tigers, and the giraffes and the elephants? I cannot, because I am in Peckham."
Crab Battle
noun
Words uttered to incite an all in brawl. Whoever says the words 'Crab Battle' will usually be spear tackled to the ground by anyone else present, and all parties will then engage in a fight to the death.
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible to our fixed, restricted fields of vision. Existence taken for granted, absolute. Possessed, owned, controlled by the common sense-infected rational gaze, onward forever we walk among the ignorant. Never stray from the common lines.
My blog . My book. My YouTube channel.
-
December 22nd 2010, 10:50 AM #172
Anastasia's Grandad
---
- Join Date
- June 1st, 2005
- Posts
- 19,209
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - Christian (other)Re: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Farmer Brown heads off to buy a forth bull for his farm.
Largest bull: Well he’s not getting any of my cows.
Middle sized bull: He’s not getting any of my cows either.
Smallest bull: He is not getting any of mine either.
Farmer Brown returns with a huge Brahman bull.
Largest bull: Well I can spare a few cows.
Middle sized bull: Me too.
Smallest bull: snorts and paws the ground.
Largest bull says: Are you going to fight him?
Smallest bull: Heck no; I just want to make certain that he knows I am a bull.Evil lurks in the hearts of men.
Tassman's POON Theory of the universe = It has "arisen naturally from nothing".
"I do like Tassmans mind" -- Bertatberts
-
December 22nd 2010, 01:18 PM #173
Evolution IS God's I.D.
- Join Date
- December 25th, 2006
- Location
- Southeastern U.S.
- Posts
- 41,915
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Why does a chicken coop have only two doors?
If it had four, it would be a chicken sedan
When is a school paper not a school paper?
When it's turned into the teacher
What's Mary short for?
She has no legs Always strive to keep an open mind – but not so open that your brains fall out!Still afeared of & dodging The PINTM
-
December 22nd 2010, 01:29 PM #174
I'll Be Back, Therefore I Am
- Join Date
- January 20th, 2009
- Location
- Ryde, Isle of Wight, UK
- Posts
- 12,456
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Paul's Third Epistle to the Corinthians:
"Dear Corinthians, I've written to you twice now... no reply. I don't know how you do things in Corinth, but in Tarsus, that's a bit rude."Crab Battle
noun
Words uttered to incite an all in brawl. Whoever says the words 'Crab Battle' will usually be spear tackled to the ground by anyone else present, and all parties will then engage in a fight to the death.
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible to our fixed, restricted fields of vision. Existence taken for granted, absolute. Possessed, owned, controlled by the common sense-infected rational gaze, onward forever we walk among the ignorant. Never stray from the common lines.
My blog . My book. My YouTube channel.
-
-
December 27th 2010, 05:18 PM #175
I'll Be Back, Therefore I Am
- Join Date
- January 20th, 2009
- Location
- Ryde, Isle of Wight, UK
- Posts
- 12,456
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
1873, the cold air ballon was invented, but it never really took off. 1891 Alexander Graham Ben received the first ever wrong number telephone call.
Crab Battle
noun
Words uttered to incite an all in brawl. Whoever says the words 'Crab Battle' will usually be spear tackled to the ground by anyone else present, and all parties will then engage in a fight to the death.
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible to our fixed, restricted fields of vision. Existence taken for granted, absolute. Possessed, owned, controlled by the common sense-infected rational gaze, onward forever we walk among the ignorant. Never stray from the common lines.
My blog . My book. My YouTube channel.
-
December 27th 2010, 05:19 PM #176
I'll Be Back, Therefore I Am
- Join Date
- January 20th, 2009
- Location
- Ryde, Isle of Wight, UK
- Posts
- 12,456
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
1530, Nostradamus predicts the pop band The Kaiser Chiefs. He also predicted a riot.
Crab Battle
noun
Words uttered to incite an all in brawl. Whoever says the words 'Crab Battle' will usually be spear tackled to the ground by anyone else present, and all parties will then engage in a fight to the death.
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible to our fixed, restricted fields of vision. Existence taken for granted, absolute. Possessed, owned, controlled by the common sense-infected rational gaze, onward forever we walk among the ignorant. Never stray from the common lines.
My blog . My book. My YouTube channel.
-
December 27th 2010, 05:46 PM #177
That moment when...
- Join Date
- November 16th, 2008
- Posts
- 4,896
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
No offense, but...
Q: A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy play a game of poker. Who wins?
A: The dumb blonde. The other three don't exist.
-
December 27th 2010, 05:53 PM #178
Anastasia's Grandad
---
- Join Date
- June 1st, 2005
- Posts
- 19,209
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - Christian (other)Re: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Evil lurks in the hearts of men.
Tassman's POON Theory of the universe = It has "arisen naturally from nothing".
"I do like Tassmans mind" -- Bertatberts
-
December 27th 2010, 05:54 PM #179
Donkey in revolt!
- Join Date
- February 23rd, 2010
- Location
- In a stable. In England.
- Posts
- 2,077
- Blog Entries
- 1
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - ChristianRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Santa isn't real?
Pin the tail on the donkey was more fun before people found out I was a donkey :/
-
December 27th 2010, 05:55 PM #180
Blu Ray Laser Phaser
- Join Date
- February 8th, 2006
- Location
- Copenhagen
- Posts
- 32,406
- Mentioned
- 0 Post(s)
Male - churchburnerRe: Tell Your Dumb Jokes Here
Originally posted by fm93
But the dumb blonde doesn't know that!
Quote
Similar Threads
-
Jokes
By OldManZangetsu in forum Rec RoomReplies: 180Last Post: April 18th 2012, 10:25 AM -
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
By Brandalf85 in forum AmphitheaterReplies: 9Last Post: January 29th 2010, 08:33 PM -
Tell all your best jokes here! Clean jokes please!
By Prometheus in forum Rec RoomReplies: 10Last Post: March 7th 2007, 08:39 AM -
Men Are Dumb
By Teallaura in forum SororityReplies: 1Last Post: October 17th 2005, 05:50 PM
Jolie's Choice
Today, 10:01 PM in Sorority