Trailer Park Heaven

[Brown Cat]

Hey guys, it's been awhile since I've been here. But that's okay since it is the habit of many cats to wander off only to show up when you least expect them.
Anyway, I composed the following ditty that I've shared with a few friends and family. This is about the third or fourth version. So just for fun, I wrote song lyrics for the Telestial Kingdom AKA "Trailer Park Heaven". I even came up with a melody although I haven't found anyone yet to put it to music. I'm thinking maybe a mandolin and such. I hope you enjoy it

Trailer Park Heaven
A whimsical view of Mormon eschatology and the Telestial Kingdom

I dreamed I had died
and gone off to judgment
to determine my eternal fate
Behind the Great Judge
in that heavenly courtroom
Stood hallways to four massive gates
He examined my life then looked at me sadly
shook his head as he said somberly,
“No glory celestial, nor even terrestrial,
it's Trailer Park Heaven for thee.”

Chorus:

Well it's all my fault, I could have done better
there's no one to blame except me
The thought that I'm stuck here and never to leave
doomed to never attain deity,
I look at those folks in the highest of heavens
and the sight makes me sigh constantly
Still in this universe, things could be a lot worse,
And it's Trailer Park Heaven for me

(Second verse)

In Trailer Park Heaven the sun always shines
and a soft breeze ever blows through the trees
No high winds nor storm clouds nor any tornado
Ever rises to disrupt the peace
And there is no night but that is all right
'Cept for times when you'd like to catch winks
Everything seems all right
But you know it's not quite,
And sometimes it just kind of stinks

Chorus

(Third Verse)

My neighborhood in Trailer Park Heaven
has some people who are unsavory,
That they're living here and not in “outer darkness”
is an unending mystery to me
Though I take no pride
in my big double wide
There is some kind of justice it seems
For the most evil despots, in the trailer park worst spots
live in busted and dinky Airstreams

Chorus

[Sparko]

I love it.

Reminds me of a John Prine song.

I wonder if you get satellite TV in Trailer Park Heaven, or just old re-runs?

[Sparko]

avant_trailer_park.jpg

The Album Cover.

[Brown Cat]

I suspect all they get is "Country Cable" which is no cable at all except that which is connected to one's rabbit ears.

[nrajeff]

Hey guys, it's been awhile since I've been here. But that's okay since it is the habit of many cats to wander off only to show up when you least expect them.
Anyway, I composed the following ditty that I've shared with a few friends and family. This is about the third or fourth version. So just for fun, I wrote song lyrics for the Telestial Kingdom AKA "Trailer Park Heaven". I even came up with a melody although I haven't found anyone yet to put it to music. I'm thinking maybe a mandolin and such. I hope you enjoy it

Are you asking for comments on it from just the anti-LDS posters? Or from the pro-LDS as well? Do you want it critiqued for cleverness and/or humor? For doctrinal accuracy? Or both?

[Cerebrum123]

That was pretty clever BC.

[Cow Poke]

Are you asking for comments on it from just the anti-LDS posters? Or from the pro-LDS as well? Do you want it critiqued for cleverness and/or humor? For doctrinal accuracy? Or both?

Sure.

[nrajeff]

Sure.

Uh, I need the answers to be from Brown Cat.

[Sparko]

Uh, I need the answers to be from Brown Cat.

Why? you answer for OC all the time.

[Brown Cat]

Just for fun, Jeff, that's all. In all the theological debate that goes on here, I think it's good to take a break once in a while for something that 's not so serious. Lighten up.

But critique away, if you wish.

[princesa]

Hey guys, it's been awhile since I've been here. But that's okay since it is the habit of many cats to wander off only to show up when you least expect them.
Anyway, I composed the following ditty that I've shared with a few friends and family. This is about the third or fourth version. So just for fun, I wrote song lyrics for the Telestial Kingdom AKA "Trailer Park Heaven". I even came up with a melody although I haven't found anyone yet to put it to music. I'm thinking maybe a mandolin and such. I hope you enjoy it

Trailer Park Heaven
A whimsical view of Mormon eschatology and the Telestial Kingdom

I dreamed I had died
and gone off to judgment
to determine my eternal fate
Behind the Great Judge
in that heavenly courtroom
Stood hallways to four massive gates
He examined my life then looked at me sadly
shook his head as he said somberly,
“No glory celestial, nor even terrestrial,
it's Trailer Park Heaven for thee.”

Chorus:

Well it's all my fault, I could have done better
there's no one to blame except me
The thought that I'm stuck here and never to leave
doomed to never attain deity,
I look at those folks in the highest of heavens
and the sight makes me sigh constantly
Still in this universe, things could be a lot worse,
And it's Trailer Park Heaven for me

(Second verse)

In Trailer Park Heaven the sun always shines
and a soft breeze ever blows through the trees
No high winds nor storm clouds nor any tornado
Ever rises to disrupt the peace
And there is no night but that is all right
'Cept for times when you'd like to catch winks
Everything seems all right
But you know it's not quite,
And sometimes it just kind of stinks

Chorus

(Third Verse)

My neighborhood in Trailer Park Heaven
has some people who are unsavory,
That they're living here and not in “outer darkness”
is an unending mystery to me
Though I take no pride
in my big double wide
There is some kind of justice it seems
For the most evil despots, in the trailer park worst spots
live in busted and dinky Airstreams

Chorus

i sang it with Randy Travis's voice in my head and the mandolin in the background, it was catchy.

[Sparko]

What was Randy Travis doing in your head?

[princesa]

What was Randy Travis doing in your head?

i conjured up his voice in my head 'cuz i needed someone country for this one

[Brown Cat]

Actually, princesa, I was thinking more of Delmar O'Donnell in the movie, O Brother Where Art Thou. I wanted it to have kind of an old-timey southern gospel feel to it.

"Somewhere in the key of C, fellers!"

images.jpg

[nrajeff]

Just for fun, Jeff, that's all. In all the theological debate that goes on here, I think it's good to take a break once in a while for something that 's not so serious. Lighten up.

I could make up songs that make fun of your eschatological beliefs "for fun" but for some reason the idea doesn't seem very fun or fair.

But critique away, if you wish.

Fairly clever. Doctrinally suspect in verse 3:

That they're living here and not in “outer darkness”
is an unending mystery to me

In LDS doctrine, the D&C (with support from the Bible) makes it fairly clear what type of people will end up in the kingdom of no glory, aka outer darkness--and why they will end up there. It is unlikely to be a mystery to any who inherit the Telestial Kingdom, since the answer is already available in the scriptures.