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Passing of a Lady

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  • Passing of a Lady

    I find myself, this evening, crashed on the couch of my 94-year-old aunt. She is an amazing lady. Throughout her life, she lived a spirit of "just do it." She worked into her late forties. Then she and Uncle Norm (a retired cop) traveled together all around the U.S. for almost 20 years. Her husband had a stroke 25 years ago, and she nursed him day and night for three years until he passed. She was in her late sixties. Then she traveled with my parents until Dad was too sick to travel. At 90 she was going to the local health club, where anyone 90 years old or older had lifetime access for free, and participated in water exercises. She walked 30 city blocks every day...and then 25... and then 20...and then 10...and then 5...and then she walked the hallways at her retirement community. Now she is in assistive living, and she is clearly at the end of her road. Right now she is sleeping. Her heart is failing her and she has decided "no more procedures." She may pass tonight. She may pass tomorrow. Perhaps over the weekend. But she will pass.

    When that moment comes, my thoughts will turn to my mother, who is the last surviving member of her immediate family. She was the youngest child. Jean was the oldest. They are the only two remaining. By sometime next week (I suspect), mom will be the only one left, and I wonder what that is like for her. She has us, of course. Five children that love her dearly. But no one left in her generation. Is that lonely? It must be. She says she loves her life - and the time she is getting with us - but I still wonder.

    With 7 billion people on this planet, I know that a life ends pretty much every second. But this is a life close to me. We lost our dad 3 years ago. My godmother/aunt a month later. A close friend passed last year spring, and another late last summer. I was at my wife's uncle's bedside nursing him when he passed last October. Another friend died weeks ago. And now this. As I grow older, the pace of death seems to increase. It is not one of the more pleasant parts of growing older.

    But still, this is a life to be celebrated. Jean squeezed every ounce she could out of every day. She was always a character, and always a delight. I do not remember her being cranky so much as once, but that may be the fog of fond memories. Whatever it is, here's to Jean. May your last days be peaceful ones, and may you find whatever it is you wish to find on the "other side."

    I love you...

    Michel
    The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy...returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Martin Luther King

    I would unite with anybody to do right and with nobody to do wrong. Frederick Douglas

  • #2
    Lovely tribute, carpe. Thanks for sharing.


    Securely anchored to the Rock amid every storm of trial, testing or tribulation.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by mossrose View Post
      Lovely tribute, carpe. Thanks for sharing.
      Facebook just didn't seem like the right venue. This did. Thanks.
      The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy...returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Martin Luther King

      I would unite with anybody to do right and with nobody to do wrong. Frederick Douglas

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      • #4
        "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." - Jim Elliot

        "Forgiveness is the way of love." Gary Chapman

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        • #5
          My condolences to you and your family carpe. Aging parents, and other relatives can really suck the joy out of life just when you should be enjoying it the most, with grandchildren laughing and playing around you and enjoying the adult relationship with your children.

          I know a little of what you are going through, my Aunt has incurable lung cancer and her brothers and sisters are taking turns caring for her. There are 4 brothers and 3 sisters, (in that order) she is the oldest girl, but will most likely be the first to go. It's an end to an era isn't it? Visit your Mom often, enjoy her while you can, encourage your kids to do the same...some day it will be too late.

          "What has the Church gained if it is popular, but there is no conviction, no repentance, no power?" - A.W. Tozer

          "... there are two parties in Washington, the stupid party and the evil party, who occasionally get together and do something both stupid and evil, and this is called bipartisanship." - Everett Dirksen

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          • #6
            Thanks all.
            The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy...returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Martin Luther King

            I would unite with anybody to do right and with nobody to do wrong. Frederick Douglas

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            • #7
              Thank you for sharing, Carpe. It sounds like she was a fun, active, and lovely lady. My condolence to you and your family.

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