Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: Dating advice and the problem of evil

  1. #1
    tWebber Theistic-Student's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Bible-Belt South
    Faith
    Christian
    Posts
    36
    Amen (Given)
    0
    Amen (Received)
    0

    Dating advice and the problem of evil

    This is my 1st thread on Tweb, so HI
    I know this section is supposed to be for prayer request, but I couldn't think of another place to put it. I seek some advice.

    I know that I'm setting myself up to get chewed out by some of you (or many of you,) but I still wanted to know any additional thoughts you may have.

    The situation is the following:
    For one year now, I, as a Christian teen, have been dating a girl that, although a very close friend, is an atheist. I am praying that God may bring the relationship to the best conclusion as he sees fit. I hope something along the lines of: the break-up won't be so rough, she'll be strong enough to handle it, or that she eventually turns to Christ, etc.

    I've tried to evangelize to her, but I'm coming short. I'm prepared to deal with intellectual barriers to faith (to some degree,) but since I'm not that good at understanding how others feel, I'm not sure how to deal with emotional barriers to the faith, which are the main objections from her (she's had a difficult upbringing, a not so great father-figure in her eyes, suffering in her family, etc.) She seems open to the issues, but I realize that these will be very hard for her to see past.

    At this point in the relationship, I don't think I will lead her to Christ myself, but I do think I can plant a seed of the gospel, or provide an apologetic that will help receptiveness to the gospel in the future.

    Your advice, thoughts, and prayers for guidance in this are appreciated.
    Thank you, and God bless you :)

  2. #2
    tWebber JohnnyP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Illinois
    Faith
    UdoxChristian/Adoptionist
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    794
    Amen (Given)
    24
    Amen (Received)
    40
    Perissos forum is good for advice.

    For now, 2 Corinthians 6:14 implies if you aren't already married to an unbeliever, don't do it. 1 Corinthians 7:12 implies that if you are, don't divorce but try to be an example. To me if you want to tough it out and see a real future, and aren't swayed by her unbelief, try to be an example. If you can at least get her involved in fun church activities, try that.

    But if you feel like you're banging your head against the wall and it really bothers you, you may want to move on. For me personally, preaching to an unbelieving partner never really worked and was an exercise in frustration. You aren't married so your options are pretty much open. That's my 2 cents.

  3. #3
    tWebber
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Faith
    Christian
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    415
    Amen (Given)
    222
    Amen (Received)
    45
    Welcome!

    The problem with the problem of evil is that it's never satisfied with a lesser experience. If God lined up all the evil things that could happen from the least to the greatest and then created a world where the most evil thing couldn't happen, then someone could still complain about it up until God created a word where the worst suffering possible was stubbing your toe. However, I think it goes farther than that because if there was a world where you could only experience joy and great joy, why would a loving God allow anyone to have the lesser experience? So it boils down to a choice between creating us in some sort of stasis field where we could have no change in experience and would be deprived of being able to do good, or creating us as moral agents who could have the will and the incredible opportunity to choose to overcome evil with good.

    It's an intellectual argument and not one I would use to help someone who is going through emotional pain, who needs to be comforted instead, but intellectually speaking, the problem of evil isn't actually a problem.

    If she's into reading books, then I suggest Mere Christianity by C. S. Lewis. Make sure to read it yourself first so that you can discuss it with her.

    http://lib.ru/LEWISCL/mere_engl.txt_...-pictures.html


    "Faith is nothing less than the will to keep one's mind fixed precisely on what reason has discovered to it." - Edward Feser

  4. #4
    tWebber Darth Executor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Kazakhstan
    Faith
    Christian
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    6,949
    Amen (Given)
    1710
    Amen (Received)
    2624
    If you're gonna break up I recommend becoming such a repulsive sissy that she'll want to break up with you instead. I think breaking up with her over religion will just turn her off Christianity more than it would have otherwise.

  5. #5
    tWebber
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    NH
    Faith
    Christian
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    273
    Amen (Given)
    14
    Amen (Received)
    22
    I'm not sure I often agree with Darth, but he has a point.

    That said, we're not responsible for others actions and opinions. Hate to say it, but you shouldn't have let it gone this far.

    Oh who am I kidding: you state you're a teenager. Upon the basis of having been one, you're not ready yet to considering anything similar to commitment. Date for as long as you want, as I presume you've still got college ahead of you. Leave the relationship as it is, perhaps as the years go by she will come around. Or leave you, or something will give.

    You're only dating. Nothing more. If she claims she wants more commitment, dig your heels in, state you've got stuff to do before you can settle down (college, job, career, etc). Who knows, maybe that will impress her.
    No Silicon Heaven? Preposterous! Where would all the calculators go?

  6. #6
    tWebber Theistic-Student's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Bible-Belt South
    Faith
    Christian
    Posts
    36
    Amen (Given)
    0
    Amen (Received)
    0
    Thanks guys. I actually feel a little better about the situation.

  7. #7
    tWebber Theistic-Student's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Bible-Belt South
    Faith
    Christian
    Posts
    36
    Amen (Given)
    0
    Amen (Received)
    0
    She actually LOVES books, and I read it a few years ago, so I just need to go over it again. This could actually be a good idea. Thanks.

  8. #8
    tWebber Theistic-Student's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Bible-Belt South
    Faith
    Christian
    Posts
    36
    Amen (Given)
    0
    Amen (Received)
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Darth Executor View Post
    If you're gonna break up I recommend becoming such a repulsive sissy that she'll want to break up with you instead. I think breaking up with her over religion will just turn her off Christianity more than it would have otherwise.
    Yeah, I figured as much.

  9. #9
    tWebber Manwë Súlimo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Upon Mount Taniquetil
    Faith
    Christian
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    916
    Amen (Given)
    65
    Amen (Received)
    307
    Point her to Ravi Zacharias. He's really good with dealing with emotional issues.

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •