RMG CamPAIN Headquarters

[LGM]

There has been a grevious error
Made by Solly, and it’s bad
He tried to nominate Al Gore
But instead he punched my chad

So now I’ll write these verses
And I’ll give you all a tip
Do yourself a favor
And vote for ‘hound or Pig or Dip

It seems T-web loves elections
Where everyone participates
But if god had wanted man to vote
He would have given….candidates!

So now much like Lyndon Johnson
I’m in a spot I don’t deserve
Nominated, but not running
And if elected…I won’t serve!



RMG
...vote late...vote infrequently...

[LGM]

And now, in a series of ongoing posts, I’d like to share my stream of consciousness on why I’d vote for other candidates for this month’s Alumnus of the Month….

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote for One Bad Pig

Number 10...I like his name and avatar

Number 9...I like the idea that there is such a thing as a Christian “punk/thrash” band

Number 8...He's the "other" white meat

Number 7...He occasionally laughs at my jokes

Number 6...He has dramatically improved his hygiene since joining Tweb

Number 5...I loooove BLT sandwiches

Number 4...Without his fat behind...there is no football

Number 3...Ask Michael Jackson... “bad” means “good”

Number 2...He’s never moderated me

And the number one reason I'd vote for One Bad Pig...Rearrange the letters in his Tweb name and you get the mystical hidden message:

“God in ape b”

RMG
...Coincidence?...I don’t think so…

[LGM]

Jaltus, I truly thank you for the nomination, but ... considering my recent blow-ups at Jason and Apologist4Him, I do not feel I can accept this nomination at this time. I took my physical pain and frustration out on them in a most unfair manner, and I still feel considerable shame for my actions.

Again, I thank you, but I must respectfully decline.

Justin

I was gonna vote for Justin…but then I see he apologized for blastin’ Jason and A4H in that mushy acceptance speech…Clearly we don’t want no house of pancakes “flip flopper”, with a weak resolve, in the Alumnus House with his finger on the button. (or magic wand...)

Seriously folks…is this Wiccan milkin’ the “Oh gee, don’t vote for me, I’m not worthy, I’m just an evil sinner” - Christian vote?
I mean come on, I spotted that one a MILE away… look!...two voters already fell for it…

And check out his avatar folks, seems there’s already been a premature self coronation on the part of Wabbit boy. First the “King of Beers” and now this…

Anyway…if it comes down between choosing between a hearty BLT sandwich on whole wheat, or Wabbit Spam on Milquetoast…you know where my taste buds are heading…


RMG
…imagine…a Wiccan king in the Alumnus House…how’d it come to this?...

[Chuck Lee]

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote for One Bad Pig

Don't forget, he also sets the standard for excellence in numerous arcade games!

[Mark_S]

and he tastes great with an apple stuck in his mouth
:luau:

[LGM]

and he tastes great with an apple stuck in his mouth
:luau:

I am soooooo diggin' that custom smile Mark...I can practically SMELL it...

Anyway, here's somethin' else that’s been buggin’ me…Is that whole Duder nominating Rahab, Rahab nominating Duder, like an Alumnus “infinite loop”?...

…or is it simply a "divide by zero" error?

RMG

[luv1another]

woah Mark did you make that smiley? if you did I know who to come to next time I need something
by the way Mark you don't have a good pouting smiley do you?

[sylas]

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote for One Bad Pig

Quite so. However, at time of writing only one person had actually done the right thing in reponse to this insightful contribution. The Pig in 2005-3! You know it makes sense.

[LGM]

And now, in a series of ongoing posts, I’d like to share my stream of consciousness on why I’d vote for other candidates for this month’s Alumnus of the Month….

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote for Rahab (instead of me...)

Number 10...I like her name and avatar.

Number 9...I really like that song “I wish they all could be Madagascar girls!”

Number 8...Lemur, it’s the “other” white meat

Number 7...I love to read her posts out loud in my best sexy female French accent.

Number 6...She had the mercy to nominate Duder for Alumnus of the month

Number 5...I’ve been in and out of rehab my whole life

Number 4...She is always thoughtful and loving towards others in her posts

Number 3...Once I asked her what time it was, and she told me how to build a clock!

Number 2...She has the courage to go toe to toe with me, and JP Holding!

And the number one reason I'd vote for Rahab... She somehow stays married to a lazy agnostic. Something my wife constantly struggles with…

[LGM]

And now, in a series of ongoing posts, I’d like to share my stream of consciousness on why I’d vote for other candidates for this month’s Alumnus of the Month….

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote RepubWiccan (Justin) (instead of me...)

Number 10...His name is too long and his avatar frightens small children

Number 9...He’s pledged to lower the taxes on all magic spells

Number 8...Flying monkey, it’s the “other” white meat

Number 7...He’s one third of the Holy Bard Godhead

Number 6...Duder thinks he’s the best, other than his unsightly iambic pentameter.

Number 5...He likes Jethro Tull and Pink Floyd

Number 4...He’s wise to the benefits of worshipping female gods

Number 3...His 2 year old son is the cutest ‘lil son of a witch…

Number 2...He doesn’t have any purple hearts and has never even pretended to be in the Texas Air Guard.

And the number one reason I'd vote for Justin... He’s the benevolent Wabbit King we’ve been waiting for, to lead us out of Tweb’s dark ages…

[technomage]

RMG, as soon as I stop laughing, I will get you!

[Solly]

And the number one reason I'd vote for Rahab... She somehow stays married to a lazy agnostic. Something my wife constantly struggles with…

Your wife is married to Lazy A? No wonder she struggles...

[LGM]

And now, in a series of ongoing posts, I’d like to share my stream of consciousness on why I’d vote for other candidates for this month’s Alumnus of the Month….

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote for Studyhound (instead of me...)

Number 10...I feel a certain kinship with anyone who has a dog avatar

Number 9...I found his acceptance speech mildly amusing

Number 8...A trained hound will retrieve the white meat you just shot out of the sky

Number 7... He is easily amused…

Number 6...He sent me pearls for the top ten reasons to vote for a Pig

Number 5...Somewhere...there is a really bad pun about casting pearls before swine in reason number 6...if only I could make it work...

Number 4... In my younger days…I was quite studious, and quite a hound…

Number 3...He thinks Churchy is a hoot!

Number 2...There does not appear to be an ounce of pretense in the lad…

And the number one reason I'd vote for Studyhound... His Tweb name conceals the mysterious and cryptic message:

Oh! Nudy Stud

[LGM]

And now, in a series of ongoing posts, I’d like to share my stream of consciousness on why I’d vote for other candidates for this month’s Alumnus of the Month….

Top 10 Reasons I’d vote for Teallaura

Number 10...I think her avatar is smiling at me

Number 9...I like her campaign stump speech, it's very focused

Number 8...Her many cats would make her a rancher in certain Eastern provinces

Number 7...She has the Mossrose Good Rolling Pin Seal of Approval

Number 6...I had a teal Ford Taurus in the late 1980s…what was I thinking?

Number 5...I think Laura Bush is really hot!

Number 4... The middle of her Tweb name Teallaura reminds me of my beloved WTC twin towers

Number 3...Her Jim Elliot signature quote is marvelously thought provoking

Number 2...She seems to prefer pork over hound or lemur…

And the number one reason I'd vote for Teallaura... her Tweb name contains a hidden message that her subconscious remembers as the first words of praise from her mother upon finishing all her mashed peas at 8 months of age:

Ra! U ate all!

[Teallaura]

Thanks, that was very sweet of you (I'm pretty sure.... ).
Seriously, thank you.