The Cult of Cabbage Worship

[Jawa Man]

Oh, okay. No harm done then.

[eudyptes]

it's never too late to turn from your evil green cabbage ways and follow the path through the garden of life to the one true cabbage...the Slawmighty Red:
[attachment]

Continued worship of the green will leave you saur, and bitter. Turn over a new leaf, cast aside the green...Red is the only way.

[Sparko]

If this is true then I wish to be the True List and Cult of Cabbage Worship Theologian (TL&CCW).

You must come up with a more pronouncible Acronym. TL&CCW is too hard to pronounce. It sounds like a sneeze.

[Spiritus Naturae]

speak to us of cabbages and kings, great cabbage prophet!

From, "The Tome of The Great Cabbages of Infinity Past". Book The First Machination of Brassica the All Powerful and Pungent. Chapter 12 verses 28-32*

The First Machination of Brassica the All Powerful and Pungent

And upon his leafy rotundness, he did find his first proselyte, KarnSla the flatulent and fearful. KarnSla didst then crawl out from the midst of the green splendor of the all encompassing verdant magnificence that is Brassica and in rejoicing didst declare a gleeful, "Ki-ki-ki Kahhh!" Thus to this day, all who hold to the truth that is Brassica declare so with a hearty and joyous, "Ki-ki-ki Kahhh!"

*All of our sacred texts are scribed upon the leafy flesh of cabbage heroes of the past.

So speakest the Cabbage, so shall it be...

Have you all completed your daily staring at the Cabbage?

[Spiritus Naturae]

it's never too late to turn from your evil green cabbage ways and follow the path through the garden of life to the one true cabbage...the Slawmighty Red:
[attachment]

Continued worship of the green will leave you saur, and bitter. Turn over a new leaf, cast aside the green...Red is the only way.

Repent, blasphemer and heretic! Shove thine face into a large green cabbage immediately and declare in muffled bliss that Brassica is the only truth of cabbagedom!

[Spiritus Naturae]

...ahem I need more "sheeple"...er, I mean, people to come on in and get a brain scrubbin'...

washy-washy, scrubby-scrubby

[QuantaFille]

Do you dry-clean brains? If so, how much do you charge?

[Gideon Brown]

It's free. And now you're in.

:cabbageyawn::cabbageyawn::cabbageyawn::cabbageyawn:

[Spiritus Naturae]

Do you dry-clean brains? If so, how much do you charge?

We do a lovely steam treatment and a one hour martinizing for your brain, cleansing you of all that cabbage hating poison you've had pumped into your overburdened cranium all your life. The only payment required is your free will, self worth and every last remnant of your dignity.

Now submit, heathen!

[Gideon Brown]

Now submit, heathen!

She already has! Now shhhhh, or she'll try to bail!

[QuantaFille]

We do a lovely steam treatment and a one hour martinizing for your brain,

The steam treatment sounds great, but if I go with the martinizing, will I think my name is Martin from now on?

cleansing you of all that cabbage hating poison you've had pumped into your overburdened cranium all your life.

I'm already forgetting the cabbage hating poison... I can't remember it anymore... I will do what the Cabbage tells me... the Cabbage is almighty and powerful... all hail the Cabbage...

The only payment required is your free will, self worth and every last remnant of your dignity.

Sounds good. Do you have any coupons or sales going on?

Now submit, heathen!

Yeah, yeah, I'm working on it. Just hold your pota-- err, I mean, just hold your cabbages.

[Sparko]

cabbage rolls.

[{Tim}]

Does membership in the True List automatically qualify me for the cabbage cult? If so, what is my position here?

[Spiritus Naturae]

Does membership in the True List automatically qualify me for the cabbage cult? If so, what is my position here?

Thou art the Proselyte Prognosticator of the Venerable Cabbage Cult and the One True List.

Enjoy your new found power!

[Spiritus Naturae]

The steam treatment sounds great, but if I go with the martinizing, will I think my name is Martin from now on?


I'm already forgetting the cabbage hating poison... I can't remember it anymore... I will do what the Cabbage tells me... the Cabbage is almighty and powerful... all hail the Cabbage...


Sounds good. Do you have any coupons or sales going on?


Yeah, yeah, I'm working on it. Just hold your pota-- err, I mean, just hold your cabbages.

washy washy, scrubby scrubby the brains of QuantaFille...

You are no longer the cabbage hating filth you once were, thus a new name is given. You are from here on out, Kohlrabi of the Oleracea!

Now go forth and set straight the Cabbage despisers and detractors that infest the forum that is TheologyWeb!