I might have to become a Wiccan

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    1. #1
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      I might have to become a Wiccan

      The little pagan next door is so polite, and he's only 11.

      He came to my door last night:

      "Is Margo home", he asked.

      "No, she is not.", I replied.

      "When will she be home?", he asked.

      "At about 9:00PM"

      "Oh, that is my curfew. By the way, it is okay for me to come onto the porch to knock at your door, isn't it? Some people get upset when I do that."

      "It is quite acceptable."

      "Thank you, I'll be back tomorrow at 4:00".

      "That would be fine, have a pleasent evening."

      --------------------------------------------------------------

      If the kid actually shows up at 4:00 today, I'm gonna convert my kids to paganism and then have them get saved back to the true faith moments before they die. (1)




      ------------------------
      NOTES:
      1: Nothing to see but troll here people, move it along.

    2. #2
      tmancour's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by Mad_Gerbil
      The little pagan next door is so polite, and he's only 11.

      He came to my door last night:

      "Is Margo home", he asked.

      "No, she is not.", I replied.

      "When will she be home?", he asked.

      "At about 9:00PM"

      "Oh, that is my curfew. By the way, it is okay for me to come onto the porch to knock at your door, isn't it? Some people get upset when I do that."

      "It is quite acceptable."

      "Thank you, I'll be back tomorrow at 4:00".

      "That would be fine, have a pleasent evening."

      --------------------------------------------------------------

      If the kid actually shows up at 4:00 today, I'm gonna convert my kids to paganism and then have them get saved back to the true faith moments before they die. (1)




      ------------------------
      NOTES:
      1: Nothing to see but troll here people, move it along.


      I'm so proud! Please pass along to him that the High Druid of Durham has heard of his politeness and is pleased! Blessings to him!

      I've noticed that a lot of Pagan children are polite (by no means all -- there are monsters in every group). I think one reason for this is that Pagans often emphasize respect and some kind of chivalric code in the raising of their children. My oldest boy is polite to a fault, and when corrected about some point of politeness he immediately incorporates it into his personal system. My little girl is another story -- but she's only 3, so I'm hoping she comes around soon. If not, then there is always military school . . .

      Arion
      "Only the Sith deal in absolutes." Obi-Wan Kenobi
      "The Bible is a mite fuzzy on the subject of kneecaps." Shepherd Book
      "No power in the 'verse can stop me." River Tam

    3. #3
      furay's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      The Wiccans that I knew in High School were some of the friendliest people I've ever associated with. Still, if I were to pick a religion based on nice people I think Mormonism would be at the top of the list.
      * I apologize for any scandal I cause to those who doing a forum search read my old posts written before and during my journey to the Catholic Faith. If you read anything heretical, impious, or just plain wrong, please forgive my ignorance. I submit everything to the Magisterium of the Holy Catholic Church. Praised be Jesus Christ forever and ever! Amen. Also, sorry for the times I was a jerk. Lot's of those!

    4. #4
      Faramir's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by furay
      The Wiccans that I knew in High School were some of the friendliest people I've ever associated with. Still, if I were to pick a religion based on nice people I think Mormonism would be at the top of the list.
      :yeahthat:

      Both pagans and Mormons could teach a lot of Christians about respect and manners. I wish I could say that my kids had perfect manners, but they do not. But I can say it is not for lack of training.

      ( Why do I have to tell them every single time to say thank you. )
      Where is human nature so weak as in the bookstore?- Henry Ward Beecher

      "I agree fully with all Faramir has said" - Dee Dee Warren

      “Duty…is the sublimest word in our language. Do your duty in all things…. You cannot do more; you should never wish to do less.” -- Robert E. Lee

    5. #5
      technomage's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by Mad_Gerbil
      The little pagan next door is so polite, and he's only 11.

      He came to my door last night:

      "Is Margo home", he asked.

      "No, she is not.", I replied.

      "When will she be home?", he asked.

      "At about 9:00PM"

      "Oh, that is my curfew. By the way, it is okay for me to come onto the porch to knock at your door, isn't it? Some people get upset when I do that."

      "It is quite acceptable."

      "Thank you, I'll be back tomorrow at 4:00".

      "That would be fine, have a pleasent evening."

      --------------------------------------------------------------

      If the kid actually shows up at 4:00 today, I'm gonna convert my kids to paganism and then have them get saved back to the true faith moments before they die. (1)




      ------------------------
      NOTES:
      1: Nothing to see but troll here people, move it along.
      The first step in conversion is chasing the kids around the yard with squirt guns. They get squirt guns too. Everybody gets as wet as an "immersion" baptism, and it's a lot more fun. Wear swim togs. Have fun.
      Life sometimes needs to be grabbed by the throat and beaten with a lead pipe. ~ Sir Longpost, a good friend of mine.

      -----

    6. #6
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by A Cup of Mystery
      The first step in conversion is chasing the kids around the yard with squirt guns. They get squirt guns too. Everybody gets as wet as an "immersion" baptism, and it's a lot more fun. Wear swim togs. Have fun.
      Ah yes... and then serve crackers and grape juice as a snack.

      "Hey little pagan, did you enjoy your baptism and first communion today?"

      Muahahahahahah!

    7. #7
      tmancour's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by Mad_Gerbil
      Ah yes... and then serve crackers and grape juice as a snack.

      "Hey little pagan, did you enjoy your baptism and first communion today?"

      Muahahahahahah!

      Heh . . . of course, if we can convince them to hug a tree . . .

      "Hey little Christian! Did you enjoy communing with nature today?"

      Muahahahahahah!
      "Only the Sith deal in absolutes." Obi-Wan Kenobi
      "The Bible is a mite fuzzy on the subject of kneecaps." Shepherd Book
      "No power in the 'verse can stop me." River Tam

    8. #8
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      OH OH!

      The kid showed up at 11:00 and not 4:00 as he said he would.

      I KNEW it, the kids a lying pagan infidel stan(1) worshipper!







      ---------------------------------------
      NOTES:
      1: Mis-spelling a word is a necessary component of an incoherent rant. Stan=satan.

    9. #9
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by tmancour
      Heh . . . of course, if we can convince them to hug a tree . . .

      "Hey little Christian! Did you enjoy communing with nature today?"

      Muahahahahahah!

      NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

      Then I'd have to teach my kid to stomp on flowers for penance.

    10. #10
      technomage's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by Mad_Gerbil
      OH OH!

      The kid showed up at 11:00 and not 4:00 as he said he would.

      I KNEW it, the kids a lying pagan infidel stan(1) worshipper!







      ---------------------------------------
      NOTES:
      1: Mis-spelling a word is a necessary component of an incoherent rant. Stan=satan.
      Get it right, MG. We're not Satin worshippers ... we much prefer cotton.

      Life sometimes needs to be grabbed by the throat and beaten with a lead pipe. ~ Sir Longpost, a good friend of mine.

      -----

    11. #11
      tmancour's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by Mad_Gerbil
      OH OH!

      The kid showed up at 11:00 and not 4:00 as he said he would.

      I KNEW it, the kids a lying pagan infidel stan(1) worshipper!



      ---------------------------------------
      NOTES:
      1: Mis-spelling a word is a necessary component of an incoherent rant. Stan=satan.

      Hey, maybe your daughter is that cute and he just couldn't help himself.
      I bet he still says please and thank you.
      "Only the Sith deal in absolutes." Obi-Wan Kenobi
      "The Bible is a mite fuzzy on the subject of kneecaps." Shepherd Book
      "No power in the 'verse can stop me." River Tam

    12. #12
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by A Cup of Mystery
      Get it right, MG. We're not Satin worshippers ... we much prefer cotton.

      Hahaha!
      I like that better.

      You Satinist!

      LOL

    13. #13
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by tmancour
      Hey, maybe your daughter is that cute and he just couldn't help himself.
      I bet he still says please and thank you.
      *talks in a low, threatening voice*

      Now then, don't be talkin' about my daughter that way. Fer as I'm concerned, when it comes to my daughters all da boys be evil doers!

    14. #14
      technomage's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by Mad_Gerbil
      *talks in a low, threatening voice*

      Now then, don't be talkin' about my daughter that way. Fer as I'm concerned, when it comes to my daughters all da boys be evil doers!
      All dads with daughters have the Eight Simple Rules memorized.

      My daughter's thirteen. Next week, I make a down-payment on a howitzer.
      Life sometimes needs to be grabbed by the throat and beaten with a lead pipe. ~ Sir Longpost, a good friend of mine.

      -----

    15. #15
      Meh_Gerbil's Avatar
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      Re: I might have to become a Wiccan

      Quote Originally posted by A Cup of Mystery
      All dads with daughters have the Eight Simple Rules memorized.

      My daughter's thirteen. Next week, I make a down-payment on a howitzer.
      I'm looking into rules for my kids (my daughter is 12).

      So far the rule is that my daughters aren't allowed to date until they get a High School diploma. I'm trying to emphasize that dating is about finding a husband and that it is serious business.

      Another rule I heard on the radio is one guy who doesn't allow his daughters to go on dates unless the boy calls and asks him. I think this is a good rule as well.

      I don't buy the whole 'boys will be boys' and 'sex before marriage is normal' nonsense. I'm gonna fight it tooth and nail.

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