Yep. It'll stop with gay marriage. Honest!

[sprky777]

......but because if we have too many then we are doing too much of it. I guess that would be the reason for the prohibition against gluttony, drunkennes, etc.

I never considered that but it would be consistant. Just as too many wives would lead you astray, so may too much alcohol. Or too much time online for that matter...

[Busheses]

I never considered that but it would be consistant. Just as too many wives would lead you astray, so may too much alcohol. Or too much time online for that matter...

Exactly

[Champagne]

We can't forget, too, that the purpose for marriage back then was very different. Women had no way to support themselves- they had to be under the care of their father or husband. Although it surely existed, "romantic" love was not a main reason for marriage. Economics was. Women did not choose who they married.

In our society in the West today, marriage is much more of a romantic partnership- based upon physical attraction, friendship, commonalities, etc. It is rarely based upon economics.

A marriage system like ours necessitates monogamy, in the sense that you can't have an intimate, romantic, friendship partnership with more than one person at a time. Someone is going to be left out otherwise, and become jealous. Thinking of your husband sleeping with another woman regularly makes most women physically ill.

But back then, I'm not sure what type of romantic, intimate friendship Solomon could have had with each of his 700 wives. There simply wouldn't be enough time for them all, for one thing. And the wives, although they may have been jealous, knew what the situation was. That they were going to have to share the man sexually.

[sprky777]

We can't forget, too, that the purpose for marriage back then was very different...love was not a main reason for marriage. Economics was.

Love/lust is usually the precursor to todays marriage. Then when the warm fuzzy feelings start to wane, divorce is soon to follow. A true marriage is a union of responsibility. We care for our spouse as we care for ourselves. We don't punish our own bodies when we have a problem. We work to resolve the problem. We value our spouse as an extention of ourselves. Another point of view, another pair of hands, another shoulder to bear our loads and our sorrows. Another heart to share our joy. It is never just you again.

A marriage system like ours necessitates monogamy, in the sense that you can't have an intimate, romantic, friendship partnership with more than one person at a time. ... Thinking of your husband sleeping with another woman regularly makes most women physically ill.

MOST but not ALL. There is much more to marriage than sex or intimacy. The polygynous families I know are not jealous and the relationships are intimate. There may have been initial jealousy before the true depth of the husbands love was realized. For a polygynous relationship to be successful the husband must love each of his wives fully to their core. True each woman is different and should to be treated according to her needs, there is no reason for jealousy when the wives realize that by sharing his love the husband doesn't love either wife any less. Just as children are all loved by their parents and needn't fight for position to garner mom and dads sole affections for themselves. They should take joy that the love they know is also such a gift to another. The husband is in an even more difficult situation because he must not play favorites or even appear to love one wife over another. But realistically, the husband may have more common interests with one wife than another or one wife might be more social with him while another is more withdrawn. This can lead to an amplification of these behaviours causing the more isolated wife to become depressed or paranoid that the other wife may be conspiring against her. Such social responses must be recognized early in the marriage and brought to the attention of each member so as to avoid any misunderstandings.

An example, one wife may enjoy ballroom dancing and she and her husband join a class or group. Every week they go out dancing and romancing and having a wonderful time. The second wife that can't dance even if her shoes were on fire may feel left out or less desired. She may have a hobby of horticulture or astronomy that the husband has no interest in. She would like to spend more time with hubby but other than an similar interest in movies, music or culinary delights they don't get have so much 'activity' in an outside social life. When she was his single, first wife every minute they spent together was hers soley. Now the time they spend together seems to be just something to do between his time with her.

Now that is unfair to both the husband and his dancing wife. She may have been invited to these dances but would rather not be seen as a wallflower. The husband must make it clear to both wives that his love of dancing with his wife is not a sign of loving her more. When such a feeling arises it must not be kept back and hidden from the others. A polygynous family must have VERY open channels of communication so everyone can participate at a comfortable level and support each other. Perhaps wife number one would like to have wife number two share in a different activity that they both enjoy and spend a little time away from hubby. Or wife number two could take a day off to manage the household while wife one and hubby go spend the day relaxing with a nature hike and a picnic dinner under the stars.

A husband with more than one wife will have a much more difficult time having to learn the needs and desires of EACH woman and they are more likely to be different than alike. If a man finds it difficult to keep one wife happy then he would probably fail to keep two happy.

[ShadowLands]

Love/lust is usually the precursor to todays marriage. Then when the warm fuzzy feelings start to wane, divorce is soon to follow. A true marriage is a union of responsibility. We care for our spouse as we care for ourselves. We don't punish our own bodies when we have a problem. We work to resolve the problem. We value our spouse as an extention of ourselves. Another point of view, another pair of hands, another shoulder to bear our loads and our sorrows. Another heart to share our joy. It is never just you again.

MOST but not ALL. There is much more to marriage than sex or intimacy. The polygynous families I know are not jealous and the relationships are intimate. There may have been initial jealousy before the true depth of the husbands love was realized. For a polygynous relationship to be successful the husband must love each of his wives fully to their core. True each woman is different and should to be treated according to her needs, there is no reason for jealousy when the wives realize that by sharing his love the husband doesn't love either wife any less. Just as children are all loved by their parents and needn't fight for position to garner mom and dads sole affections for themselves. They should take joy that the love they know is also such a gift to another. The husband is in an even more difficult situation because he must not play favorites or even appear to love one wife over another. But realistically, the husband may have more common interests with one wife than another or one wife might be more social with him while another is more withdrawn. This can lead to an amplification of these behaviours causing the more isolated wife to become depressed or paranoid that the other wife may be conspiring against her. Such social responses must be recognized early in the marriage and brought to the attention of each member so as to avoid any misunderstandings.

An example, one wife may enjoy ballroom dancing and she and her husband join a class or group. Every week they go out dancing and romancing and having a wonderful time. The second wife that can't dance even if her shoes were on fire may feel left out or less desired. She may have a hobby of horticulture or astronomy that the husband has no interest in. She would like to spend more time with hubby but other than an similar interest in movies, music or culinary delights they don't get have so much 'activity' in an outside social life. When she was his single, first wife every minute they spent together was hers soley. Now the time they spend together seems to be just something to do between his time with her.

Now that is unfair to both the husband and his dancing wife. She may have been invited to these dances but would rather not be seen as a wallflower. The husband must make it clear to both wives that his love of dancing with his wife is not a sign of loving her more. When such a feeling arises it must not be kept back and hidden from the others. A polygynous family must have VERY open channels of communication so everyone can participate at a comfortable level and support each other. Perhaps wife number one would like to have wife number two share in a different activity that they both enjoy and spend a little time away from hubby. Or wife number two could take a day off to manage the household while wife one and hubby go spend the day relaxing with a nature hike and a picnic dinner under the stars.

A husband with more than one wife will have a much more difficult time having to learn the needs and desires of EACH woman and they are more likely to be different than alike. If a man finds it difficult to keep one wife happy then he would probably fail to keep two happy.

Just a thought on polygamy:

Has anyone considered that the Genesis account involves the creation of one man and one woman? That was the original intent of marriage. God didn't make Adam and (insert number >1) wives.

[Conductor42]

Has anyone considered that the Genesis account involves the creation of one man and one woman? That was the original intent of marriage. God didn't make Adam and (insert number >1) wives.

Well, we could delve into the topic of Lilith... but I fear that would drive this thread too far off-topic.

But let's apply the logic further:

We should consider that God later made regulations for polygamy. Maybe his intent was that polygamy be allowed, and continued.

Maybe it was ideal for Adam, but not for another.

Of course, all of this is based on assumptions - and I don't think I need to remind you what assumptiosn do to you and me.

[Conductor42]

If it shows up properly on your browser;

This is written in Chinese

quite profound, yes?

lol