"I Apologize"

[Steven]

"I apologize, and I really mean it this time..."

We have all heard many apologies, whether big or small, passionate or flippant. If we are human, we have all given them at one time or another; some we meant, some we didn't. Apologies have become as common as "Thank you.", or "Good night."; as abundant as greasy fries at a fast-food drive-thru.

In order to conceptualize the act of apologizing, one must understand the action of salvation:

If I have sinned against my brother I must go to him and apologize; if my brother has sinned against me I must forgive him as my Lord has forgiven me.

“But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca', is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, `You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell. 23. "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24. leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” Mathew 5:24-25

What does it mean to apologize? How do I reconcile with my brother?
Literally, an apology is made up of three parts:

• 1. An acknowledgment of sin - Psalms 32:5 Matt. 5:23 “remember that your brother has something against you”
• 2. With an expression of regret, contrition or repentance - 2 Corinthians 2:7 Matt. 5:24 “First, go...”
• 3. And a plea for reconciliation - Matthew 5:24 “and be reconciled to your brother.”

The Scriptures command, in the above verses in Matthew, to be reconciled with your brother whom has aught against you; there is, however, a common deception in today’s modern Christianity concerning this very subject: it denotes that one may use the act of apologizing as the reconciling tool to "smooth things over". It is not that the apology itself is wrong, but if I say that what I did was wrong, I had better believe that I did such a thing and that it was indeed wrong, that I am not simply patronizing the other party with a condescending “apology”.

What is a false apology? Unlike the true apology, the false “apology” is best described as a sort of ‘social gratuity’; it is not given out of true contrition, nor the stirring to make things right, but out of obligation or for the sake of “let’s all just say what we have to in order to get along.”
It is, in truth, a lie... given for the desperate appeasement of formulaic attempts to reconcile, spawned from the fear of man and the preservation of one's appearance.

In direct contrast, the true apology leads to the edification of the Body of Christ and demonstrates the power and work of the Gospel in a true believer's life.

So, let us examine ourselves, to make sure that we have chosen true humility through the work of Christ, that we do indeed mean what we say when we apologize and that we are really attempting to restore that which was broken by our sin.

- Steven

[ApologiaPhoenix]

This looks good, but my problem is that I don't see who this is an apology to, what it is apologizing for, and how you intend to go about reconciling to the offended party/parties.

[Sparko]

I accept your apology Steven.

[Steadfastlove]

I think that maybe we are not to try and judge whether the apology is a true one, or a false one, but to accept it at face value. Maybe the person doesn't mean it deep in their heart but has chosen to apologise because they know it is the right thing to do....?
The reason I have come to this conclusion is that when Peter asked the Lord how many times should a person forgive, the Lord Jesus replied seventy times seven. Well, honestly, if someone kept repeating the same offence against you and then kept apologising, you might be forgiven for doubting their sincerity. Hence me coming to the view that we are not to do the judging, but let the Lord, who sees the heart, do it.

Matt 18 : 21Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?
22Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

[Steven]

This looks good, but my problem is that I don't see who this is an apology to, what it is apologizing for, and how you intend to go about reconciling to the offended party/parties.

There's no apology here. The article is called "i apologize" and is on the subject of apologies in general.

[ApologiaPhoenix]

There's no apology here. The article is called "i apologize" and is on the subject of apologies in general.

Excuse me a nano-second to register my shock then.

[Sparko]

what was with all those shoutbox apologies then?

[!Fluffy!]

Excuse me a nano-second to register my shock then.

Hilarious!

[themuzicman]

Re: apologies, I have 1 rule:

Actions speak louder than words.

[GreatWhiteHype2]

Re: apologies, I have 1 rule:

Actions speak louder than words.

But the combination of the two is sweet!

[Steven]

I think that maybe we are not to try and judge whether the apology is a true one, or a false one, but to accept it at face value. Maybe the person doesn't mean it deep in their heart but has chosen to apologise because they know it is the right thing to do....?

Pardon our incredulity, but how can it be sincere if the apology is not meant by the person apologizing? Is that not in fact, lying?

For example, what if your sweet grandmother was brutally mugged, and the mugger came along later and said "Oh! I'm sorry... did I steal your purse?" Should your sweet grandmother say: "Oh, it's ok; I didn't need the money anyway..." and accept his 'apology' at face value, or, should she flog him a bit with her cane?

[Steven]

Does God accept our apologies at face value, without examining our heart?

In other words, can I just say after I've sinned, "Oh, I'm sorry, God. Stuff happens. Somewhere up there, I know you'll find it in your vast Kingdom to forgive me..."

[Mark_S]

Pardon our incredulity, but how can it be sincere if the apology is not meant by the person apologizing? Is that not in fact, lying?

For example, what if your sweet grandmother was brutally mugged, and the mugger came along later and said "Oh! I'm sorry... did I steal your purse?" Should your sweet grandmother say: "Oh, it's ok; I didn't need the money anyway..." and accept his 'apology' at face value, or, should she flog him a bit with her cane?

I vote for accept apology. Is this a trick question?

[Sparko]

Pardon our incredulity, but how can it be sincere if the apology is not meant by the person apologizing? Is that not in fact, lying?

Are you saying that your apology is not sincere? Then why did you post it in the first place?

I am shocked and dismayed.

[Steven]

I vote for accept apology. Is this a trick question?

So, let me understand you, that it is ok for the (fill in the in blank criminal) to continue in his criminal endeavors as long as he apologizes each time?