Official TAMS Pre-nuptial Agreements Thread

[lao tzu]

Okay, so you've finally managed to find that perfect, or maybe not so perfect, arranged TWeb partner, or had one assigned at any rate. You're engaged. Congratulations! Let the party begin!

Not so fast, there, kids.

Even with the best in pre-marital counseling and careful arranged selections, there's no guarantee that your bliss won't turn into hiss. Considering the available arrangers run from manky scots gits to lithping sith overlordth, the thoughtful couple will choose to hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.

And that's where this thread comes in.

Do you know what you want out of your TWeb spouse? You should. And you should get it in writing.

Girls, how many poems do you expect each week? How much IM time? How many sibling and pet goldfish names must be memorized without fail?

Boys, what's your limit on online personality surveys? One a week or one a month? How many xox's do you need before you sign off each night?

Spell it out, and you'll always have a club to wield on your significantly virtual other.

Now some of you are thinking, "Wait, I'm not engaged." Or, "Wait, I'm already married." Don't let that stop you from spelling out your needs. It'll give your prospective or future (pending current virtual marital dissolution) mate an idea of how to please you before they set out to find a matchmaker.

So, who's our first customer?

[Johnny MacManky]

Erm, yeah... official.

[Ice Angel]

[One Bad Pig]

[Jawa Man]

I'd like one if everything goes well with shay.

[Johnny MacManky]

Well, you have to list your expectations, etc...

[lao tzu]

I'd like one if everything goes well with shay.

Well, you're in luck. We've got a special this month just for the Jedi crowd.

1. Light sabers remain the property of their original owners, no matter how much time they spend sheathed in the back of one's virtual spouse.

2. Spouse must agree to put hair up in Leia spirals at least once a week, independent of gender.

3. Tales about family in any one IM conversation are limited to no more than one sibling, parent, cousin, or beloved pet goldfish.

4. All poetry requests must be made in verse.

Custom assignments are also available.

[Johnny MacManky]

Perhaps Jawa should consider the following custom clause...

Spouse shall not grow her hair more than 25 feet long and never any more than 24 feet 11 inches longer than mine.

[Elegy]

[lao tzu]

Hold on there just one minute, missy. We've got one around here just for teh 13375.

1. $|*0|_|$3 $|-|@|| \X/|21+3 @|| |0\/3 |3++3|2$ 1|\| @ |@|\|6|_|@63 0|= |\/|`/ (|-|00$1|\|6.

2. @|| J3[)1 $|*0|_|$3$ |\/||_|$+ |}3 |*|23|*@|23[) +0 |16|-|+ $@|}3|2 |*3+ 60|[)|=1$|-| \X/|-|3|\|3\/3|2 1'|\/| |=33|1|\|6 |}0|23[).

3. |*03+|2`/ |\/||_|$+ @|\X/@`/$ |}3 @((0|\/||*@|\|13[) |}`/ (|-|0(0|@+3.

4. |-|16|-| q|_|@|1+`/ (|-|0(0|@+3. |}|_||2|\| 1+ 1|\|+0 `/0|_||2 |=0|23|-|3@[) |}@(|<\X/@|2[)$ @|\|[) (@|2|2`/ @ |\/|1|2|20|2.

You'd be a fool not to take advantage of it, girlie.

[Elegy]

poetry must always be accompanied by chocolate. high quality chocolate. burn it into your forehead.

:w00t:

[CallistoSeeking]

Perhaps Jawa should consider the following custom clause...

Spouse shall not grow her hair more than 25 feet long and never any more than 24 feet 11 inches longer than mine.

!!


Hmm...maybe I should get my arranged engaged in here..though I don't really care for the idea much of a prenup...

[Jawa Man]

I have to admit, your accent of 1337 was so thick that it took me a few minutes to translate it.

[ApologiaPhoenix]

!!


Hmm...maybe I should get my arranged engaged in here..though I don't really care for the idea much of a prenup...

Present!

[Conductor42]

1. Light sabers remain the property of their original owners, no matter how much time they spend sheathed in the back of one's virtual spouse.

Who says it'll be sheathed?