I Hit a Deer

[DesertBerean]

I was on the jury regarding a rather spectacular multi-car accident on one of our freeways where one of the vehicles, a 1950s- something pickup, had hit a bull. The guy was a rancher, and was able to estimate the bull at about 500 pounds. His solid steel hood and his windshield were crumpled pretty badly.

[rogue06]

OK, time for a cop story.

One night I was on routine patrol in my own city, when dispatch called my unit and asked my 20 (whereabouts). I replied, and dispatched informed me that a neighboring city (with whom we had a mutual aid agreement) had a patrol officer report that he was out of his vehicle on a main highway, and they haven't heard from him - he was not answering his radio. Dispatch was asking if I could go check on him. Obviously, I would, and did....

I saw his cruiser up the road, lights flashing, and pulled in behind his patrol unit. Several cars were pulled over, but none appeared to be in front of his patrol unit, as though he had stopped them. It was an odd situation, made more odd by the fact that there were no people around.

I looked up the hill that ran along this highway, and there was a crowd of people lined up along the cyclone fence at the top of the ridge, and the people seemed to be watching something toward the fence. I notified dispatch that I would be out checking, but the situation did not appear to be 10-13, or "officer in trouble".

As I walked up the hill, the crowd parted to let me through, and I saw my fellow officer literally pinned to the cyclone fence by a wounded deer, the deer leaning on John hard, blood spurting out from gashes in the deer's neck and chest, and John was beating the deer on the head with his flashlight. The crowd was waving and yelling "Shooo... go away, deer!" And John was beating the deer on the head....

As I'm trying to take in this scene, I realize that the butt of John's service revolver is lodged in the chain link fence, and he can't pull his weapon, so he's beating the deer with his flashlight. He sees me, and starts yelling "Shoot this thing!"

I immediately think of the Jerry Clower episode where John (John was my fellow officer's name, too) was up the tree and had cornered a lynx, and was crying "shoot this thang", and "Shoot up here amongst us, one of us needs some relief!" I start laughing uncontrollably, while trying to work my way around to grab the deer by the antlers and wrestle him down, or be able to get a clean shot without hitting John or a bystander.

Maybe the sight of me was too much for the deer to take, because he suddenly collapsed to the ground, quivered a bit, and died. I was still laughing, John was covered in blood and mad as a wet hen, the crowd was applauding, and I finally radio'd dispatch and told them everything was under control.


(The deer had been hit by a car, John had gotten out to investigate, the deer had run up the hill, and John had given chase to "dispatch" the deer, when things kinda turned around, and John found himself pinned to the fence by the shoulder of the deer. It was funny at the time, but deer hooves are sharp as razors, and could have done some serious damage, or antlers could have gouged John's eyes out. But it was hysterical at the time)

The first couple of paragraphs had all the earmarks of the start of a horror movie.

[Cerebrum123]

The first couple of paragraphs had all the earmarks of the start of a horror movie.

Well, I'm sure that at least two individuals were horrified during the event.

[Cow Poke]

Well, I'm sure that at least two individuals were horrified during the event.

And it was certainly beginning to look that way!

[supton]

I figure, deer or smaller, better to hit the brakes but not swerve. Odds of it coming through a windshield are pretty low. And something of a chance that it'll move--last thing I want to do is go the same way.

Moose, those are worth swerving for. They are known for rolling onto the roof and crushing passengers.

Pick your odds. Those are my plans.

Knock on wood, haven't hit any, yet. No close calls either. Couple of raccoon though. In both cases, just wasn't paying enough attention (one was early morning / not awake, other was "driving faster than my lights"). In both cases they were in the middle of the lane and I thought I could clear right over them. In both cases I was wrong...

[rogue06]

I guess if I had a choice I would aim the car at the rear end of the deer. It seems to me that there's a good chance that the deer might continue moving forward so I'll miss it and a much smaller chance that it'll move backwards causing me to hit it in the middle of the body. If it doesn't move and I hit it then I think it is more likely to be sent spinning off to one side rather than being lifted up and slamming through my windshield.