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Two Dozen (or so) Arguments from Bacon
The divine command argument from bacon: God told Peter eating bacon is morally permissible (cf. Acts 10); therefore, veganism is false
The ethical egoism argument from bacon: Eating bacon is clearly in my own self-interest; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral relativism argument from bacon (subjectivism version): I deem it morally right for me to eat bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral relativism argument from bacon (cultural relativism version): According to my culture, eating bacon is morally permissible; therefore, veganism is false.
The natural law argument from bacon: The proper end of pig is to be eaten as bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The argument from bacon from Hitler: Hitler was a vegetarian, hence he didn’t eat bacon, don’t be like Hitler; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral exemplar argument from bacon: Saint Anthony Abbot (patron saint of bacon) ate bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral nihilism argument from bacon: Nothing is wrong, so eating bacon can’t be wrong; therefore, veganism is false.
The metaphysical nihilism argument from bacon: There are no pigs, so there is no bacon, so eating bacon can’t be wrong; therefore, veganism is false.
The utilitarian argument from bacon: The pleasure gained from eating bacon >>> the pain the pig feels being killed for its tasty bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The aesthetic argument from bacon #1: Eating bacon produces an elegant, simple and hence, beautiful, savory symphony in the mouth of the one who eats it; therefore, veganism is false.
The aesthetic argument from bacon #2: The form of the average tofu fed person is objectively uglier than the form of the average bacon fed person; therefore, veganism is false.
The Bayesian argument from bacon: Let s be the proposition that you are moral scum, e be the proposition that you eat bacon, and t be the proposition that bacon has an amazing taste, then P(~s|e&t) >> P(s|e&t); therefore, veganism is (likely) false.
The consensus gentium argument from bacon: There is a certain presumption of the truth of any opinion held by many human minds, many minds are and have been of the opinion that there is nothing wrong with eating bacon; therefore veganism is false.
The Rawlsian argument from bacon: If the people in the original position were given a menu of food items to choose from, bacon would be on the list and they would select bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The Kantian argument from bacon: Pigs would consent to being eaten and so aren’t mere means to an end; therefore, veganism is false.
The Western Culture argument from bacon: Islamic terrorists do not eat bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The Moorean shift argument from bacon: If veganism is true, eating bacon is immoral, but eating bacon is not immoral; therefore, veganism is false.
The dialetheism argument from bacon: eating bacon is immoral and not immoral; therefore veganism is false.
The eudaimonian argument from bacon: Bacon is necessary for true human flourishing (just look at those who don’t eat it); therefore veganism is false.
The low-T argument from bacon: Science shows that the saturated fat in meats like bacon are important for healthy testosterone levels; therefore, veganism is false.
The longevity argument from bacon: The oldest woman in the world eats bacon daily; therefore, veganism is false.
The cognitive dissonance argument from bacon: Vegan tells herself that she doesn’t like bacon, “But I do…wait, I don’t…but I do…no, I don’t…yes, I do” [smoke comes out of ears]; therefore, veganism is false.
The dilemma argument from bacon: Either anemia or bacon, not anemia, so bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The direct inference argument from bacon: Bacon; therefore veganism is false.
https://argumentfrombacon.wordpress.com/
The divine command argument from bacon: God told Peter eating bacon is morally permissible (cf. Acts 10); therefore, veganism is false
The ethical egoism argument from bacon: Eating bacon is clearly in my own self-interest; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral relativism argument from bacon (subjectivism version): I deem it morally right for me to eat bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral relativism argument from bacon (cultural relativism version): According to my culture, eating bacon is morally permissible; therefore, veganism is false.
The natural law argument from bacon: The proper end of pig is to be eaten as bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The argument from bacon from Hitler: Hitler was a vegetarian, hence he didn’t eat bacon, don’t be like Hitler; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral exemplar argument from bacon: Saint Anthony Abbot (patron saint of bacon) ate bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The moral nihilism argument from bacon: Nothing is wrong, so eating bacon can’t be wrong; therefore, veganism is false.
The metaphysical nihilism argument from bacon: There are no pigs, so there is no bacon, so eating bacon can’t be wrong; therefore, veganism is false.
The utilitarian argument from bacon: The pleasure gained from eating bacon >>> the pain the pig feels being killed for its tasty bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The aesthetic argument from bacon #1: Eating bacon produces an elegant, simple and hence, beautiful, savory symphony in the mouth of the one who eats it; therefore, veganism is false.
The aesthetic argument from bacon #2: The form of the average tofu fed person is objectively uglier than the form of the average bacon fed person; therefore, veganism is false.
The Bayesian argument from bacon: Let s be the proposition that you are moral scum, e be the proposition that you eat bacon, and t be the proposition that bacon has an amazing taste, then P(~s|e&t) >> P(s|e&t); therefore, veganism is (likely) false.
The consensus gentium argument from bacon: There is a certain presumption of the truth of any opinion held by many human minds, many minds are and have been of the opinion that there is nothing wrong with eating bacon; therefore veganism is false.
The Rawlsian argument from bacon: If the people in the original position were given a menu of food items to choose from, bacon would be on the list and they would select bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The Kantian argument from bacon: Pigs would consent to being eaten and so aren’t mere means to an end; therefore, veganism is false.
The Western Culture argument from bacon: Islamic terrorists do not eat bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The Moorean shift argument from bacon: If veganism is true, eating bacon is immoral, but eating bacon is not immoral; therefore, veganism is false.
The dialetheism argument from bacon: eating bacon is immoral and not immoral; therefore veganism is false.
The eudaimonian argument from bacon: Bacon is necessary for true human flourishing (just look at those who don’t eat it); therefore veganism is false.
The low-T argument from bacon: Science shows that the saturated fat in meats like bacon are important for healthy testosterone levels; therefore, veganism is false.
The longevity argument from bacon: The oldest woman in the world eats bacon daily; therefore, veganism is false.
The cognitive dissonance argument from bacon: Vegan tells herself that she doesn’t like bacon, “But I do…wait, I don’t…but I do…no, I don’t…yes, I do” [smoke comes out of ears]; therefore, veganism is false.
The dilemma argument from bacon: Either anemia or bacon, not anemia, so bacon; therefore, veganism is false.
The direct inference argument from bacon: Bacon; therefore veganism is false.
https://argumentfrombacon.wordpress.com/
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