Forgiving someone, but unable to forget the wrong

[Christian3]

Someone wronged me and I told them I forgave them.

But, I can't forget that wrong.

Can anyone tell me why?

Thanks.

[mossrose]

Sometimes the forgetting never leaves us. What leaves us is the bitterness and hurt that comes from the wrong done us.

[TheWall]

Forgiving someone doesn't mean that they did not hurt you.

[Christian3]

Sometimes the forgetting never leaves us. What leaves us is the bitterness and hurt that comes from the wrong done us.

Yes and I keep going over and over the hurt, thinking about it too much. I keep praying to God that he will erase these people from my mind.

I think for me I realize I should have done things differently when I was hurt as an adult by an adult.

However, how do I forget a hurt done to me as a child?

[Christian3]

Forgiving someone doesn't mean that they did not hurt you.

Good answer.

[KingsGambit]

If Christians were not allowed to take past wrongs into account, this would lead to conclusions we could not live with in the real world, even if we recognize forgiveness. To use an obvious example, if a man had abused a child, and had since been released from jail... yes, he's forgiven, but the church should still not let him be a youth leader.

[mossrose]

Yes and I keep going over and over the hurt, thinking about it too much. I keep praying to God that he will erase these people from my mind.

I think for me I realize I should have done things differently when I was hurt as an adult by an adult.

However, how do I forget a hurt done to me as a child?

A very hard question, my friend. All I can tell you is from my own experience, and that as an adult and not a child. With true forgiveness will eventually come a lessening of the hurt. God will bring you peace and comfort, and even though it may a while, it will come.

[Christian3]

A very hard question, my friend. All I can tell you is from my own experience, and that as an adult and not a child. With true forgiveness will eventually come a lessening of the hurt. God will bring you peace and comfort, and even though it may a while, it will come.

Maybe I need to wait some more.

I remember my uncle who was a deacon or an elder in the church sitting in front of me while I was sitting in a dining room chair -- maybe I was 8 or 10 -- the chair had arms on it -- he put his hands on the arms and kept me pinned in the chair so I couldn't get out. He kept laughing and I started to cry. My aunt was in the next room and finally said to him to let me go and he finally did.

Why did he do that? What kind of a Christian was he?

[mossrose]

Maybe I need to wait some more.

I remember my uncle who was a deacon or an elder in the church sitting in front of me while I was sitting in a dining room chair -- maybe I was 8 or 10 -- the chair had arms on it -- he put his hands on the arms and kept me pinned in the chair so I couldn't get out. He kept laughing and I started to cry. My aunt was in the next room and finally said to him to let me go and he finally did.

Why did he do that? What kind of a Christian was he?

Perhaps he thought he was being funny, as sometimes all people do without really thinking. And sometimes people, even Christians, especially Christians sometimes, can do thoughtless hurtful things. It doesn't make them any less a Christian, just human.

[Christian3]

Thanks guys. I found that just talking about this with you has helped.

[Thoughtful Monk]

Yes and I keep going over and over the hurt, thinking about it too much. I keep praying to God that he will erase these people from my mind.

I think for me I realize I should have done things differently when I was hurt as an adult by an adult.

However, how do I forget a hurt done to me as a child?

There are a couple people I really struggle with how to forgive myself. I hope that the passage about as you forgive so shall it be forgive you isn't applied too harshly or I'm going to fry for eternity.

Forgiveness is hard and I don't understand where the people who say forgiveness is easy are coming from.

[mossrose]

There are a couple people I really struggle with how to forgive myself. I hope that the passage about as you forgive so shall it be forgive you isn't applied too harshly or I'm going to fry for eternity.

Forgiveness is hard and I don't understand where the people who say forgiveness is easy are coming from.

Forgiveness is not easy, and I hope I am not one of those who gave the impression that it is. It took me years to forgive a hurt done to me as an adult and I found it extremely difficult. But the lifting of a burden that it gave me was almost overwhelming.

[Thoughtful Monk]

Forgiveness is not easy, and I hope I am not one of those who gave the impression that it is. It took me years to forgive a hurt done to me as an adult and I found it extremely difficult. But the lifting of a burden that it gave me was almost overwhelming.

I wasn't think of you. Mostly some pastors (some in churches and some on radio/tv) when they preach on forgiveness.

[mossrose]

I wasn't think of you. Mostly some pastors (some in churches and some on radio/tv) when they preach on forgiveness.

[Christianbookworm]

If something was easy to forgive, that something didn't really merit forgiveness. There would be nothing to forgive in that case.